Home For Horny Monsters - Book FourChapter 17: Battlegrounds free porn video

The technicolor clouds of the Dreamscape parted as Mike fell through them, and he flipped himself over in an attempt to finally stick the landing on the beach. For a moment, he thought he had it, but at the last second his feet swung out from under him and he slammed into the ground hard enough that the beach crumbled beneath him. He fought to stay above the flowing sand that rushed in to fill the gap, and was busy pinwheeling his arms when a golden ray of light broke through the sky above to illuminate him.

The fairy queen descended slowly, her diaphanous wings spread out behind her. The regal attire she had worn in the court had been replaced with resplendent armor that glistened in the light of the Dreamscape. The clouds parted, and a choir of angels hummed a battle hymn as she landed on the beach, her bare feet pressing into the sand.

She looked around the island, her eyes scanning the water, then turned to look at the house and frowned. Curious, he followed her gaze and saw that the house was in a state of disrepair that made no sense, and the roof of his porch had collapsed.

“And so we see the inner workings of your mind,” she said. “I can’t say I’m disappointed. This is roughly what I would expect from a mortal.”

“Yeah, well—”

He tried to pull his foot out of the sand and fell on his face, getting a mouthful of grit. There was a rush of air, and a strong hand grabbed him by his other leg and yanked. He was pulled free of the sand, and now dangled upside down in front of the queen. She seemed bigger than she had been just a second ago, and his breath caught in his throat when another pair of arms unfolded from her torso.

“Let’s see what you’re made of, Caretaker.” She spun in place and hurled him through the air, and he careened across the beach and then slid across the sand.

He bounced over an errant boulder and landed in a tide pool, which caused the crabs inside to stand up on their hind legs and flee. A fat starfish cartwheeled behind them before performing a belly flop off of a large rock on the shoreline. Mike was almost back on his feet when she grabbed him by the hair and yanked him backward, then slammed him into the ground and placed her foot on his chest.

“Feel free to wake up when you’re ready,” she told him, then held up a hand full of purple fire. “But try to last. I want to carve you up first.”

Pain radiated through his body, but now that he had a moment to concentrate, he was able to disperse most of it. She had gotten the drop on him, that was true, but this was his Dreamscape, and he refused to let her get to him.

He caught movement off to his side and saw a crab within reach. The damn thing was wearing a top hat and a monocle, but he grabbed it by the face and smirked at the queen.

“Feeling crabby?” he asked, then threw the crab at the queen.

When it hit her in the face, it exploded into hundreds of tiny crabs, each one wearing a top hat or a monocle. She jumped away from him and shook herself off, the tiny crabs scurrying away in a hurry once they hit the ground. When she stomped on them, they burst into smears of blue and pink paint.

“Is that all you have? Mortal puns? Stupid jokes?” Her arms and torso were covered in red and white paint smears now, and Mike suppressed a grin. When she tried to rub it off, it just created long streaks of grime that sparkled when the light hit the smashed monocles just right.

“I’m just trying to buy myself some time,” he said, then struck his best martial art pose. Though inexperienced in the art of self defense, he dug into the mental intent of the act, and felt his mind connect with the beach around him.

When the queen ran toward him, he swept his hand dramatically in front of him. The sand of the beach erupted, blasting into the queen and smashing her into a grove of nearby palm trees.

He dramatically made a fist, and the beach followed suit. It was almost ten feet across, and as the queen pulled herself out of the trees, it slammed into her hard enough that one of her wings crimped, and he heard her shout something he couldn’t understand. He summoned another sand hand and then put his palms together, willing the beach to grind the queen like a stone in a rock polisher.

A blast of lightning hit him in the chest and blew him across the ground. He tumbled backward and landed on his feet, raising his hands for the inevitable followup. It was another blast of lightning, but he summoned a steel rod from the sand, and the lightning hit that instead.

“So, maybe I was hasty,” the queen muttered, her upper body free of the sandy prison. She had her fingers pointed like a gun at him, and a nasty looking storm cloud swirled overhead.

“Did you think this would be easy?” he asked her.

The queen ignored him, her eyes scanning the beach. He sent another sand fist at her, but she raised her own hand and created a barrier of stone. He tried a stone fist, but she countered with a piece of paper that covered the fist and caused it to implode.

“Clever girl,” he muttered with a hint of annoyance.

“I am older than the Dreamscape,” the queen said, then summoned a bubble to surround her. “What you do here is nothing more than cheap parlour tricks compared to its true potential. I thought I could pressure you a little at a time, make you think you had a chance, then frustrate you to no end.”

“So you’re toying with me.”

The queen smirked. “I believe the cliche you would use is ‘blowing off steam.’ I have taken your measure, Mike Radley, and know what you are capable of.”

Mike lowered his hands. “So ... does that mean you give up?”

The queen rolled her eyes. “Your arrogance is tedious.”

“It isn’t arrogance. I am going to win.”

“You have no idea how sad it is that you believe that.” The queen vanished, then appeared right next to him. “I’m tired of listening to you.”

A band of metal slammed against his mouth, and when he tried to pull it free, she yanked his hands away and then slammed him into the ground. He grunted, and she lifted him up and threw him hard into a nearby palm tree, causing the tree to snap and fall. Even though his pain was diminished, he was in agony as the bones of his body shattered and healed in seconds. She paused to lift him up, her extra hands pinching his face as if he was a cute child.

“I wanted to hear you beg, but this is far more entertaining.”

She grabbed his skull and slammed him into a nearby rock. The rock broke apart, so she summoned an even bigger rock. He whimpered when he saw it, and when she smashed through him, his whole body distorted like jello, then bounced back into shape.

“You have no idea how much I’ve wanted to do this to you,” she growled, then grabbed his arm and yanked it off. He stared in horror as she tossed it away, and then yelled when she grabbed the new arm that had formed and repeated the process.

He closed his eyes and tried to focus, but her onslaught continued. He was her hammer, and the whole world had become a nail. He was so distracted that he was unable to bend his own Dreamscape to his will. He reached out to try and find Naia, his ace in the hole, but she was centered in the middle of the house. Until the queen decided to go inside and smash some furniture with his head, he would have to hold on.

The queen was now over twelve feet tall and was casually smacking him into trees. He let the pain wash over him, his mind holding onto the idea that his real body was perfectly fine, and that nothing she did to him would leave lasting harm.

“You dare to defy a queen in her own court?” She slammed him into the ground, then pressed his face into the sand. “You miserable miscreant. I have lived many thousands of years on this plane of existence, and no creature would dare to say the things you have!”

She emphasized her point by picking him up and flying across the beach like a stealth bomber, only she shoved his face into the sand, using the beach as an industrial sander. When she lifted him up, she scowled at his appearance, then dropped him and stomped him into the ground hard enough that the world went black as he was buried beneath a foot of sand.

When she pulled him back out, she was still ranting, but in a language he didn’t understand. The sand beneath her feet was turning black as if scorched with heat, and she lifted him into the sky before slamming him down again. However, the longer she went, the easier it was to disconnect his mind from the sensations of his body. After another couple of minutes, he was only along for the ride as she took out her frustrations on him.

At some point, she must have noticed, because her assaults were now less ambitious, and she finally tossed him in the sand.

“It’s that damned succubus,” she told him. “I was aware she was training you, but no mortal should have a grasp on this place like you do.”

“Mmph,” he replied. It wasn’t a very kind thing to say to a queen, but he figured it was lost in translation anyway. He stood on wobbling legs and yanked at the metal on his face. It didn’t come off, so he held up his right hand as if he was wearing a sock puppet and mimed talking with it.

“You fucked up bringing me here,” he told her, his voice coming from his hand. “If I give up, I die. You can slow time, trap me here, but I’m aware that this isn’t my body. My real body is with Cecilia, and even if you trap me here forever, you’ll be trapped, too. So you can slap me around, set me on fire, whatever, but it’s far better than the alternative. Your show of power is meaningless, Your Highness, because this isn’t air we’re breathing, there is no fucking spoon, and you have no real power here.”

The queen’s face turned a dark green and she took several deep breaths, her eyes radiating with power.

“You will regret this,” she said, and the air on the beach went still.

“Wakka wakka, bitch,” he said with his hand, then gave her the finger.

When she teleported this time, she picked him up by his skull and pressed her fingers into his eyes. The assault on his mind was immediate, and he felt her tear through his memories as if desperately seeking a page from out of a book. His memories appeared and disappeared in a flash, and she aggregated many memories of his mother, literally ripping them from his head and tossing them onto the beach where they expanded and formed.

They were all yelling now, and the screams felt like knives against his flesh. He fought to tune them out, but now they were descending on him with raised hands and shrill cries. The queen dropped him onto the ground and he tried to fight back against the copies of his mother that attacked him, but it was no use. They were taking turns screaming in his face, and he could see their words appearing in the air before slamming into him and sinking into his skin.

It felt like he was on fire, and suddenly he was stuck in that burning car with his mother once more, the one that had killed her and left him with a lifetime of scars, literal and emotional. She screamed in agony as he tried to fight his way free of his seatbelt, for he was hanging upside down as dripping gas from the car ignited. The other memories of her kept pushing him back in as he tried to escape, their fingernails scoring his skin. Panicking, he sank his hands into the roof of the upside-down car, willed it to bend like clay, and then tried to dig his way to freedom. The hands grabbed his feet and pulled him back inside the car to allow the flames to consume him.

A strong hand grabbed him by the leg and pulled him out, and it was the queen. She snarled and threw him into the sand nearby, and he tried to squirm away, but his mother found him again.

“Did you think I wouldn’t use her against you?” the queen asked as she stomped toward him. He tried to scramble away, but his mothers were grabbing at his clothes and pulling him in every direction, their words now written on his skin.

Worthless. Disgusting. Nasty.

When he read the words, they swirled around, feeling very much like ants. In his fight to be free, he shoved his hands deep into the sand and felt something brush against his fingers.

When the queen grabbed onto him, he held onto the object out of reflex. As she dragged him free, he pulled a door wrapped in thick vines from beneath the sand. It had an ornate doorknob with a very big keyhole beneath it.

“Oh? What have we here?” The queen pushed the door away and it lifted up as if suspended by wires, then hovered above the sand. She looked at Mike, then looked at the door. Even with his mothers screeching at him from every direction, he had no trouble hearing the queen’s voice.

“Mmph,” he replied.

“I sense ... hmm.” She placed a hand against the door, then looked at him. “This was generated by your mind, wasn’t it? It’s an anxiety. You know what’s behind this door, don’t you?”

He shook his head vehemently, very much aware that she knew he was lying.

“Anxieties are a fickle thing. They tend to trap you in your own personal hell until you wake up.” The dark green of her skin was fading, and she now wore a huge grin. She grabbed the door with her hand and started turning the knob. “I can’t wait to see—”

She was cut off by the surge of water that blasted the door open and sent Mike, his mothers, and the queen tumbling across the beach. Now free of the queen, he kicked his feet and swam sideways along with the flowing current of bathroom water that had created a raging river that ran out into the ocean. Once free of the river, he sprinted toward the house, knowing it was his best chance at freedom.

There was a cry of rage from the beach when Mike reached the front yard, and he was almost to the door when he was tackled from behind. The two of them crashed against the shattered remnants of the porch, but Mike was able to grab a plank and smack it against the queen’s temple. She snarled and took the wood away from him, and he sent his mind and heart into the home, hoping he was close enough to summon Naia. The part of her soul that was bound to him had all of her power here, and he knew she would be able to help.

“Enough!” The queen picked him up and slammed him against the nearest wall, choking him with two hands while pinning his arms with the other two. Her body was dripping with sewage, and the curls of her hair had come undone, making her look like a drowned rat. “If I have to spend the next hundred years in here ripping you to pieces, I will!”

“Mmph!” he called out to the house, hoping that Naia would hear. Already, the memories of his mother were beginning to circle the yard, their words reaching out to him like clawed hands. He had no offensive plan, and his defenses wouldn’t hold up against the emotional assault of his mother for much longer.

The queen leaned in close, revealing that her teeth had become fangs.

“I will chew your goddamn face off,” she whispered in rage. “I will run my fingers beneath your skin, I will—”

Her eyes went wide and she leaned back to reveal that a thick, black tail had wrapped around her throat, choking her off. When she shifted to see her attacker, Mike was surprised to see Lily standing there.

“Oh, you must be the new girl,” Lily said. “Sounds like you’re into some kinky shit. The safe word is chucklebunny, by the way.”

Lily pulled with her tail, and the queen let go of Mike. The queen put her hands at her hips and drew a quartet of golden blades that appeared from nowhere.

“Treachery,” she growled. “No outsiders are allowed!”

“Mmph mmph, mmph,” Mike agreed, even though he was glad to see the succubus. Had she simply waited in the Underworld, and had now stepped in to intervene? And where was Naia?

“Hardly.” This voice came from the side of the house, followed by the sound of hooves on stone. Zel appeared, and she held what looked like a golden scroll in the air. “According to the terms of your agreement, his entire soul is eligible for this contest. After all, that’s why you’re able to use his own mother against him, isn’t it?”

“What? How?” The queen looked at Zel, then Lily, then Mike. Behind him, he heard movement in the house, and looked over his shoulder to see Ratu appear, carrying a large ball of fire in her hand that pulsed hungrily.

“It’s complicated,” Ratu informed her, and then threw the ball of fire.

Beth realized she was holding her breath, then let it out in a quick burst. Marco’s face was covered in black lines that looked like bulging veins, and she wondered if her former co-worker was even still alive.

Kisa, on the other hand, looked just fine, save for her crystalline blue eyes and the necklace around her neck. Beth recognized it right away; it was the same necklace Ratu had been studying.

“Well?” Marco pointed his wand at Kisa. “I can assure you, no matter how many lives she has left, she won’t survive a direct hit from this.”

Up on the roof, Abella stood with her fists clenched, her eyes now on Beth, awaiting instructions. Far above the house, the fairies had descended, most likely for a closer look. The spirits had pinned Sulyvahn against some bushes, and he had dropped his own head on the ground.

“You have nowhere to go,” Beth said. “Right now, your castle is under siege by demons.”

“I’m aware,” Marco replied. “I’m aware of everything. I’ve been watching everyone in this house for the last month, following your every step, predicting your every move. I put ideas in your heads, allowing you to go about your days thinking you were in control.”

“You couldn’t have known Lily was bringing an army,” Beth protested.

“Please. Even chaos is predictable. She was aware that I told the fairie queen when he was coming. I knew she would go with him, which gave her the opportunity to round up some friends on her return trip. Nothing that happens here happens without my approval.” His tone was smug, and she had never seen a shit-eating grin so big. “All they will find in that tower is a bunch of delays.”

Kisa looked over at him with disapproval, her mouth twisted into a grimace. Her left hand moved to the necklace, touched it briefly, then went back in the air.

“So you knew about Samhain?”

“Poor, simple Beth. Who do you think dropped that book in front of you?”

She gasped. The pieces were coming together, but she wasn’t about to admit it. Something was going on with Kisa, maybe something the shadow couldn’t predict, and he seemed very eager to chat about it.

“That was you?” she asked, feigning innocence.

“Of course it was. I’ve been watching all of you ever since the box was opened.” He tucked the book under his arm and took a step forward. “This place used to be my home, and I know all of its secrets. Granted, I have to wait until the Caretaker discovers them, but once they do, I have years of insights to pull from. Once this useful meatsuit delivered the box containing the observatory, I knew that the Grimoire would be mine again. All I needed was time.”

“But surely you couldn’t have planned for everything?” Beth put the palms of her hands against her chest, as if surprised.

“But I did!” He took another step forward. “Granted, Death and the dullahan were a nuisance, but easy enough to dodge. I whispered tales of Halloween in the goblin’s ears as she worked, had Marco post pictures of the Jabberwock on the internet to draw a crowd, all of this was me!”

Kisa threw another nervous look at Marco. “Let’s go,” she growled.

Beth couldn’t believe it, but the shadow was actually monologuing. Mike had mentioned how chatty the shadow was, but seeing it in person, she knew she could use it to her advantage.

“What about Kisa? There’s no way she would betray the house. What have you done to her?” Beth laid it on thick, knowing that whatever possessed the cat-girl saw right through it. However, the way that the hand kept reaching for the necklace made her think that Kisa was still in there, and she was fighting.

“Ratu always thought she was so smart, but it never occurred to her that the spirit inside the necklace may be one of your most dangerous enemies. She found it in the lake in the Labyrinth, and—”

“Stop talking,” Kisa said. “Let’s go.”

Beth moved her hands away from her chest, and while moving, used sign language.

Get the book, she signed, hoping Daisy was looking at her. On signal.

“How do we know you won’t just kill her when you leave?” she asked, then signed again. She tried to make it natural, hoping that the shadow or Kisa wouldn’t realize what she was up to.

“We need to go,” Kisa repeated, and her hand touched the necklace again. She swatted it away and hissed.

“Yes, right.” He held the wand at Kisa. “Get out of our way.”

“No.” Beth crossed her arms and rolled her eyes, catching a glimpse of the fairies. They were hovering in a circle about twenty feet above Marco, and she locked her eyes on Kisa. “Not moving.”

“I will kill her,” Marco threatened. “Mike Radley will be devastated to know that you could have saved her and didn’t.”

Beth held her breath, hoping she was right. The shadow had manipulated everything up until this moment, causing nothing but violence and chaos. Why not just blow Kisa to smithereens and escape in the carnage? Or even better, use the wand to clear the way and leave?

Everything he had done, he had done for a reason. He needed to leave, but there was something she had overlooked, a reason he couldn’t just blast his way out. She would understand if he was facing an army, but it was just her right now. Whatever decision she made, she would have to make it soon. Part of her wanted to move aside, to just hide and live to fight another day, but a huge part of her was indignant that her decisions had all been predicted, that this bastard was about to win so easily.

Was this how Mike had felt when he faced down the queen by himself? Was this how he always felt? The responsibility for the house was a heavy weight indeed, and right now, it was hers alone.

“No,” she told him. “If you want to get out, you’re gonna have to get out through me.”

Marco aimed the wand at Beth. “Do you think I won’t kill you?”

“If so, you would have done it when you broke in.” She narrowed her eyes, deciding to push her luck. “Is it because of the deal you made with Marco? What you used to trick him? You can’t hurt me, and I’m guessing you can’t hurt her either, not without killing your new bestie.”

“Fuck this.” Kisa snagged the wand from Marco’s hand and pointed it at Beth. “I’m not dying in this damn place again.”

The wand lit up, and for a moment, all Beth saw was the burning ring of light that expanded rapidly before coming toward her. The air roared with energy, then somebody tackled Beth from behind, slamming her face first into the ground. The spell passed over her, making her ears pop, and she let out a scream, then curled her hands up and frantically signed the word for now.

Marcus yelled, and Beth looked up to see that the fairies had descended on him, swirling around his face and blasting him with glitter. Kisa tried to snatch the book out of his hands, but Cerulea grabbed onto her face and shoved both her arms up the cat girl’s nostrils to brace herself. When Kisa tried to rip her away, the fairy’s body stretched like latex, then snapped back into place, rocking Kisa’s head backward.

Beth groaned as she tried to stand, but there was a heavy weight on her hips. She looked back to see Tink, her face covered in chocolate and bits of candy, wearing a big grin.

“Tink see bad magic, make good run,” she said, then turned her attention toward the house. For a moment, Beth wondered if the goblin might cry, but then frowned when she realized that Tink’s cheeks were turning red. Tink adjusted the goggles that had been twisted about on her head, and the lenses all clicked into place.

“Tink gonna kill someone,” she muttered, then ran back down the walk to where her club lay on the ground.

“Gah!” Kisa was being pulled around by her face now, and the wand went off, catching Abella in mid-air. The blast sent the gargoyle tumbling through the air and into one of the second-story windows, where she disappeared. Kisa grabbed Cerulea and yanked her away from her face, then threw the fairy on the ground and stomped on her.

Marco succeeded in slapping Daisy out of the air and then swatted Olivia with the Grimoire. Carmina fled back into the sky as a few nearby spirits made a grab for her, leaving Marco alone. He opened the Grimoire, his mouth twisting up as he read words of power that surrounded him in a crimson aura that turned Beth’s stomach. The hood of his sweater had fallen back, and she watched as Marco’s black hair turned grey from front to back as the spell drained more of his life away.

With a grin, he finished the spell he was casting, and then took a crossbow bolt to the forehead.

“Tink!” Beth looked to her left to see that the goblin had transformed her club into a crossbow and was lying on her back, using her feet to aim it.

“Bastard break house, earn goblin wrath,” cried the goblin, then jumped up from the ground.

Marco toppled over backward, but a dark silhouette remained standing in his place. The shadow held out his arms while letting out a screech, and his soldiers obeyed. They moved toward him and became motes of light, which he absorbed, his silhouette darkening until he seemed solid.

“No mercy indeed,” said the shadow, and he picked up the Grimoire. The crimson aura swirled around him and then coalesced into a pulsing sphere of energy that hovered just over his shoulder. The light from the sphere was bright enough to illuminate the features of his distorted face, sending chills down Beth’s spine.

She looked at Marco’s corpse, and a sick feeling filled the pit of her stomach. This was somebody she had known, someone that had sat across from her for years, and he had just been snuffed out in front of her.

A drop of rain hit her on the nose, disrupting her musings, and she looked up to see that ominous clouds had formed overhead. Puzzled by the sudden shift in weather, she was further surprised by the large creature that landed on what remained of the roof with a heavy thud.

The ball of energy buzzed excitedly, and then a beam of light arced out across the lawn, incinerating the yard and spirits alike. Beth ran from the beam as it chased her, and then collided with Kisa, who was also trying to flee.

The beam stopped just short of incinerating the both of them, and Beth looked up in time to see Kisa staring back, her eyes wild.

“Get out of my way,” she shrieked, then jumped to her feet. She didn’t make it far, because Tink launched herself at Kisa, and both of them became a tumbling mess of teeth and claws.

“Tink see nasty bitch ghost, get out of stupid cat!” She was on Kisa’s back now, and grabbed the cat girl’s ears and yanked. Kisa howled in agony, then grabbed Tink by the hair and smashed her into the ground.

“Get the fuck off of—ow, you fucking bit me!”

Kisa’s forearm was in Tink’s mouth, and Beth could see blood running out of the wound. She moved to help, but Kisa tried to use the wand on Tink, but only succeeded in pointing it straight down.

The blast sent the two of them flying apart, and Beth was tossed onto her back. She smacked her head on the ground and fought to keep her wits about her as the world tilted sideways.

From where she lay, she saw the shadow move toward her, his hands raised in excitement.

“Your world is about to—” the shadow’s proclamation was cut off when lightning lit up the sky to reveal the biggest bird Beth had ever seen in her life. It was clutching the remaining turret in its claws, and massive streamers of electricity flowed all along its feathers.

A second blast of lightning revealed Quetzalli, who stood nude on the edge of the roof. Her horn glowed an ominous blue color, and her arms were stretched wide. Nearby, Dana was hiding in what looked like a metal cage that had been attached to one of the iron beams.

Yeah, sure. Whatever. Beth only had so much brain power left, and asking questions would have used what was left up.

Several blasts of lightning struck the dragon girl, and the air became charged with electrical energy. Her face was a mask of concentration as she manipulated the powerful electrical arcs along her body, and everything in the yard lit up with filaments of electricity. Her outstretched arms blazed with flickering light as a loud hum filled the air.

The spirits in the yard came into focus, surprise on their suddenly human faces. The air around the shadow shimmered as he seemed to absorb the energy, but there was an outcry from inside the house as the second round of invaders was booted. Souls now flowed out of the building in rapid fashion, and the shadow turned his attention on the bird.

“No, stop him!” Beth cried, but her own voice sounded far away. Had she even spoken out loud? The thunder was making her ears ring.

A whip made of bones struck the shadow from behind, leaving a white mark that sparkled. The shadow stumbled forward, then turned his attention toward Sulyvahn. The dullahan’s head was back on his body, and his features were twisted up in anger.