Crash Landing free porn video

CRASH LANDING by Eric Thanks to Steve Z for editing Episode One: The Flight RICHARD My name is Richard Yokum (No Dogpatch jokes, or I'll bust you right in the kisser! I wasn't a heavyweight champ in the Navy for nothing!) I scowl at my approaching charter. They - especially the man - were the kind of people I can't stand! He was a Boston Dodge - filthy rich and a Brahmin - very effete and super condescending. He treated me like I didn't really exist. She was the former Cynthia Parker of the New York Parkers. She was editor of some god-awful fashion magazine - telling women new ways to look ridiculous at any time of the year! Her husband and her father had bought it for her. A rich kid toy. She is about two years younger than my 32. I guess she was pretty - even beautiful in some snotty way. Tall and slim (Too slim for my taste, I like a little more flesh on my women!) elegant, long blonde hair, blue eyed and so well-groomed and dressed it made you want to puke! As they drew closer, I changed my frown into my usual impersonal air, to which I was always happy to add an air of vague comtempt - not enough that they could complain, but just enough to make them uneasy. I bet myself a million bucks I know what the effete snob is going to say - 'Ah, my good man!' Dodge spoke (I still didn't know his first name - nor did I give a damn!) and sure enough, "Ah, my good man, are you quite ready to leave?" I just won - too bad I didn't have enough money to pay myself! I nod and turn to my pride and joy - my plane. She is a beauty - and so may I say is my wife. Maggie is flying with us, to act as hostess and smooth over my rough edges. She still takes my breath away. Maggie had been a dancer- stripper in San Diego - and was I ever lucky to get her to marry me! The guys were always swarming over her like bees around honey - and why shouldn't they! Midnight black hair, a smiling, pretty face and a figure that had more curves than a scenic railway! My attention went back to my snobs - I was to fly them from Oahu to all the Hawaiian Islands, and then on to Tahiti and then New Zealand. I would net a cool fifty-thousand dollars for a month of work. Not too shabby. CYNTHIA I didn't like our pilot, but it wasn't important enough to say so. His safety record was impeccable, and that's all that really mattered. He was both tall and burly, and he eyed us with fake contempt - I was used to the lower order's envy, and rather enjoyed it. His wife was the kind of woman I could not stand. I wasn't surprised to find out she had been a stripper and nude lap dancer! How disgusting! She was obviously one of those stupid women who think of themselves as a sexual being before all else. I glance at Hamilton, and am revolted by his behavior - he is eyeing her with ill-concealed lust. Men are just impossible! I admit this Yokum is a good pilot (What a droll name, suits him very well.) A sudden tropical storm comes up, but he gets us down with little difficulty. The island is beautiful, and I find myself relaxing. I must say that Yokum knows the island well, and after the storm subsides, flies us and drives us to the most breathtaking views! Of course, we don't associate with them on a social level, but I can well imagine what they do in their cheap motel down the road from the Ritz - vulgar bed wallowing! Hamilton despises him even more than I do. He keeps saying, "Cynthia, the Yokum chap - well, the man doesn't know his place." "Hamilton, dear, that's where you are wrong. Yokum knows his place very well, it's just that you don't like the place!" I smile at my witty remark, and Hamilton frowns. My smile becomes questioning, "I notice you seem to look on the distaff Yokum with approval, DEAR?" His face takes on the haunted look of a husband at bay. "You're mistaken, Cynthia, I am disgusted at her blatant vulgarity and lower class sexuality!" I let it pass - I have won the point. RICHARD I make the long flight to Tahiti without difficulty. I may act macho all the time, but I am not a fool - that long a jaunt in a small plane over open water is no joke - nor will be the flight to New Zealand. My passengers are too idiotic to know the risks! Speaking of my cargo, if the asshole Dodge doesn't keep his eyes to himself, he going to get a sandwich de-knuckles. Maggie says she can handle herself, but I still don't like it! Shit - both Maggie and his majesty have gotten the Tahiti trots - I have to laugh, 'shit' is just the right word! The thought of his snootiness groaning on a toilet bowl makes me bear Maggie's problems easier. It will be a few days before they are well enough to travel again! So that means I am stuck with the Cynthia bitch! I think of the money - well, it's a living - it beats having to pretend Officers in the Navy have any sense and having to obey every stupid order that comes my way. She looks beautiful and elegant as usual getting in the limo - God help me - I find her physically attractive. The curse of the male make up - thinking with our dicks. CYNTHIA I am uneasy being alone with Yokum. I despise the male and his blatant macho attitude. But curse female instincts - I find him attractive because he is a strong, dominant male who would be a good protector - I tell myself that these feelings are the result of being in a primitive setting and away from the fountainheads of civilization, New York and Boston. The island is breathtakingly beautiful. That night we end up overlooking the most beautiful spot I have ever seen. It houses the shrine of some island goddess or other. I have to keep him at a distance, as my cursed weaker instincts are urging me to take control of this man's feelings and make him my protector. I think it is Hamilton's fault. I have no confidence in him as a protector without his money. We stare at the moonlight scene. I am horrified to learn that I take pleasure in his obvious desire for me. He moves closer, and like some stupid heroine in those Romance novels (I despise when I read them!), I find my pulse racing. His husky voice causes me to tremble. "Get a hold of yourself, woman!" I tell myself sternly. "Legend has it, that the Goddess Pethe is a jealous god, and must always be shown proper respect and no - Ah - vulgar acts must be performed at her shine." God help me, all I can think of is vulgar acts. I turn to him, and Yokum takes me into his arms. God, what a night - me, Cynthia Parker, eagerly coupling with a blue collar, vulgar man on the grass before a heathen Idol! But, God was the sex goooooooooooood!!! RICHARD A few days later, I am flying the Dodges to New Zealand. I can't believe the Dodge bitch and I made out! What was I thinking! Of course, my question is my answer - I wasn't thinking at all. I chuckle, remembering how the old idol had seemed to frown with displeasure at us! I hope Maggie never finds out - she would be so hurt - she lives for my love, and I feel like a heel! Suddenly, a major storm comes up out of nowhere! It's impossible! The damn weather report had the chances of a storm at zero when we took off. The sky is one bolt of lighting after another! Then a lighting bolt from the heavens comes down and fries my plane. Shit - there goes the electrical system, and of course all the instruments and the fuckin' radio! "What's happened?" yells Dodge, with all the indignity of $200,000,000 million in old money. "Fuckin' lighting bolt has shorted everything out! We're going down!" "Do you think it is the idol!?" Cynthia screams. Fortunately, her husband is too terrified to hear. Maggie clutches at me. "I Know you will get us out of this, Dick! I just know it!" I wish I had her confidence! But it does make me feel better. With all my strength, I fight the plane and the winds! Slamming into a stormy sea at 400 knots is going to be like slamming into a mountain! I break through the cloud layer, and what's that below!? Thank God! An island! At least we have a fighting chance. Another bolt of the fucking lighting lights up the world before us. It's amazing how much you can see in a brief second's flash. The island has a huge beach. I bank the plane towards it - wheels down, flaps down! "Brace yourselves! We're going down!" I shout over the storm. "Please, God, I will be good!" I find myself whispering just as we hit. We bounce along the beach, and then we nose down and I blackout. I come to - the sun has come up. Shit! How did I get in the back seat!? I feel like every bone in my body is broken. The asshole Dodge stirs besides me. He looks at me and says, "Darling! Thank God, you are alive!" Then he clutches my hand. I have a very bad feeling about this! Episode Two: The Rebuilding Richard The effete snob was actually looking at me like I was a person, and not a piece of furniture. His smooth (Never did a lick of work!) hand was enfolding mine! I looked down, knowing and dreading what I would see. Double fuck! I was in Cynthia's body! Shove shit into my mouth - had I died and gone to hell!? I was Cynthia, and married to Hamilton Dodge! I open my mouth to say I knew not what, when I heard my Maggie scream. "Help me - Dickie is bleeding!" "Your point?" asks an annoyed Dodge. Boy did she ever slap his face, and I grin... "Get your sorry, two-faced ass up here, or I will scratch your pretty boy face, asshole." I had never been so proud of her. White-faced Dodge did so, and between the three of us, we hauled my poor bleeding body out of the plane. I knew first aid, so I examined my old self. First I stop the bleeding - Yuck! - blood on my hands. I hear myself say in a cultured voice that I find very annoying, "Just a mild concussion. He should come out of it soon." 'Richard Yokum' groaned, and came awake with puzzled eyes, only to be roundly kissed by Maggie. Was I ever jealous. Dodge tried to say something about what a lousy pilot he was, and even his wife as a beginner could do better, and Maggie slaps him so hard his teeth rattle. "I've always wanted to do that," said 'Richard' in a daze. Then 'he' saw me, and screamed and fainted. Great - just fuckin' great - what was happening to my rep - now I was going to known as a sissy. Me - who had got medals for bravery under fire in the US Navy - and they don't hand out silver stars like door prizes! I looked at my beautiful plane, and groaned. Her nose was buried in the sand, and one engine looked damaged. Without thinking, my nervous hand went up to smoothing now long, blonde hair. I looked at my hand, and just blurted out, "Oh no - I have broken a nail!" Oh my God, what did I just say? I felt like fainting myself. Damn that idol anyway! My 'husband' came over, and tried to take me in his arms and comfort me. I squirmed out, and he did not act too surprised. Then 'Richard' came awake again. Hamilton went and stood over the supposed pilot with his hands on his hips, and said censoriously, "Well - just don't lie there, fix your stupid little plane so we can get out of here!" I looked like I might break out into tears. "Oh, Hamilton, how can you talk like that to me?" I thought Hamilton might have stroke then and there, and I smiled hopefully at the beautiful thought. I looked around, a beautiful tropical island - all it needed was to have Hamilton's grave to be even more beautiful. The endless stars overhead seemed to twinkle slyly, and say, 'Bury him deep!' Hamilton's snotty voice broke into my happy dreams. "Enough of your sarcasm, my good man - fix the plane!" And he stalked off down the beach in high dudgeon. "I'll get you a drink, darling," said my Maggie. She shot me a dirty look, and 'accidentally' almost knocked me down with her too large hip as she went by. For the longest time, Cynthia and I stare at each other in unbelieving wonder. The tropical moon shown down on on the strangest scene in the world. Two enemies, wearing each other's bodies. God, I hated him - her - hated Cynthia. Then she broke the ice. "A fine mess you have gotten us into! Asshole! You angered the idol, and look what happened. Now we've got to get back and suck up somehow to get switched back." "Me?!" I squealed indignantly. "Me? You were the one who seduced me." The large male shoved me down on my padded rear. I was speechless with indignation. "Yes, you! Or do you want me to knock some sense into that empty head?" said Cythia, threatening me with my own huge body. I glare at him with withering contempt - it went right over his empty head. "As far as I'm concerned, you have stolen my wonderful body, my wonderful golden life and my husband, and left me in your tawdry blue collar one!" "Do you think I want to be you, or have your life - and your asshole husband - as if!" "What's wrong with my life and my husband?" he says in a dangerous voice. I laugh hysterically. "I don't have time to go into it all - let me just say I would rather be dead in a ditch than be married to Hamilton Dodge the sixth!" Cynthia turns my former face red with fury. I don't know what would have happened then, but Maggie came back with a large bottle of bourbon. God, did it look inviting, but the selfish brute just took it unthinkingly and drank out of it. "Let's all get a good nice rest, and decide what to do in the morning," said Maggie, being the peacemaker. As paying passengers, Hamilton demanded and got the comfortable sleeping bags - while the crew got blankets. Cynthia I still cannot believe it! What a demotion! From Mrs. Hamilton Dodge to bum in one hour. God, I would like to set fire to that pushy statue. I stare across at Yokum in my own body, and hate the way he misuses it. He - or she - has no sense of grace. I feel like choking the asshole who is responsible for this, but it would be my own body I would be choking. We need to talk. I get sleeping pills out of my purse, and slip a few into drinks for Hamilton and Maggie. God, the thought of her for my spouse almost causes me to lose my cookies! What a vulgar slut. I look at her again. I guess she does have a good figure, though. Soon Ham and Maggie are cutting zzzz's. I grab Yokum in my body, and shake him until his teeth rattle. "Now, listen up, I say." "Okay, Okay, you ugly unprincipled brute," my old voice says. My former blue eyes start weeping. "If you're going to be me until we get switched back by the goddess, you ought to act like a lady - not a drunken swab. Get me?!" Resentfully she nods, glaring at me - as if I give a fuck. I teach Richard, in my beautiful body, how to talk and move. I am surprised that he - she - picks it up fairly quickly. I explain a little of my glorious world, and she explains a little of her lunatic fringe one. "God, this bra is killing me!" she groans in an unladylike manner. I start to rebuke her, until she raises her arms above her head taking her sweater - my former sweater - with them. I start to get more than a little hot - it's humiliating. "Would you help me with my bra?" Richard asks in my most pleading voice. I wonder what the bitch is up to. Well, it is a reasonable request, so I go over and take it off. My beautiful tits swing free, and I catch my breath. My old voice has a smug smile. "Go ahead and touch them, if you like," she says coquettishly. God, do they ever feel good. I feel so hot and bothered. Shamelessly, Richard presses my former body against me; she grins wickedly wide-eyed. "Well, sailor, I can tell you are glad to see me!" I flush - the hard on is already rock hard. Let me tell you that fucking yourself is the weirdest experience of my life! I wake up in the morning and find Richard has discreetly disappeared. The plane doesn't look too bad in the sunlight. With Richard's whispered aid, I went about making a rough crane to lift the nose. "I understand your wife has some experience as a pilot," I say to Hamilton, who raises his eyes brows. "Yes," he answers reluctantly. "Good! I can use her. Why don't you and my (I choke on it, but get it out) wife get some water and bamboo," I say as I hand him my ax. "And keep your hands off - this thing can cut more than wood," I add. I didn't like the way he had been looking at her. I hate unfaithful spouses! Well, I guess I had been unfaithful, but it was his own fault for getting the shits in Tahiti. I don't like the way Richard is using my eyes and face as they leave. "What a pompous ass," he says, using my cultured voice for his uncultured thoughts. "Well, at least he's not a slut!" Red-faced Richard slaps my face. "Lay off Maggie, she is loving and sweet, two qualities sadly lacking in yourself." We glare at each other. Then we set to work fixing the plane. It's great being so fuckin' strong, and I grin to see Richard in my elegant body straining away. "Now I want you to at least be kind to Hamilton!" I order. "If we don't get back into our real bodies, I've decided to divorce him." "What!" I yell, loud enough that the trees above us shook! She nods my former head decisively. "Yep, as I said, I would rather be dead in a ditch than married to such an asshole." I grabbed her roughly. "Hey, you're bruising me." I ignore her. "Listen! Don't you dare get a divorce - no member of my family has ever gotten a divorce! It's death due us part with the Parkers!" Her lovely blue eyes glance involuntarily up the cliff Hamilton and Maggie are climbing. "Hummm!" she says reflectively, with a sinister smile. "Death do us part, you say?" I tighten my grip, and she squeals. "Listen, you bitch! Whatever happens to Hamilton will happen to Maggie, divorce or death - if you divorce Hamilton - or if he has an 'accident', the same thing will happen to Maggie! Do you understand?" "You monster! Maggie's sweet and kind and loving and Hamilton is a major, self-absorbed asshole!" "Nobody's perfect!" I respond hotly. "And your Maggie is nothing but a low class slut!" Richard knees me in the balls. Wow, does that ever hurt! We glare at each other, and continue working on the plane. It's a great effort of will not to wring her neck. Our spouses come back hot, tired and complaining about each other. I have Maggie prepare the meal, while the new Cynthia maliciously gives Hamilton a spade and tells him to dig a hole under the right propeller. I just remember - I will have to fly this crate out of here! Somehow, I find myself confiding my worries to Maggie. "Don't worry, cuddlecums," she coos, "Mommie will make all those worries disappear." God, her talented whore hands and body are all over me! "But..." I croak! She giggles - "Who cares what those ice freezing asses over there think. We're on a beautiful tropic island, and we need each other!" Boy, is the slut talented. I find myself losing it. She giggles again, and slides a fingernail along my hard prick and I lose it completely. I can't help myself - I plunge deep within her with uncontrollable ardor! She cries out - no, screams - really screams - I plunge deep within, with my teeth tearing at her huge tits! Richard What is going on over there? Using the sneaky quality of my new body, I creep over. Damn Cynthia! He is making love to my wife! How dare he! I am livid with fury. I almost burst in, but what can I say. 'Stop! I am really Richard!' Right! Well, what is sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander! Two can play at that game! I stalk back to where Hamilton is washing his naked body under a tropical water fall. I lure him back to our bedrolls. I want Cynthia to hear as I did - sex with the other's spouse. "What's going on, Cynthia?" "I need you Hamilton," I say seductively. I am proud of myself - I say it without throwing up. Now to loosen the stiff as a board asshole up. Hey, I used to be a man - who knows better how to turn a man on? Soon I have him panting and asking for more. I smile smugly - putty in my hands, silly putty! I really drive him wild with desire. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Cynthia standing there with a look of unbelief on my former face. I scream out in fake passion that then becomes not so fake - I've fooled my new body too - now it's enjoying itself. Afterwards, Hamilton looks adoringly at me and says, "Darling Cynthia, thank you, thank you, thank you! That was far and away the best time!!" I hear my former voice gasp, and I grin. Hamilton falls off into an exhausted sleep, a broad grin on his repulsive face. I get up and smile at Cynthia. "Think you're so smart, do you?!" he asks furiously. "As a matter of fact, yes!" "Well, for your information, you whore, MY Maggie has said that our time together was the best time for her ever - too! - and said I was much more passionate and considerate then before! So there!" "You're lying!" "Fuck - ask her yourself, you bitch!" The tropical moonlight stares down completely unappreciated. Episode Three: The Return! (Or is it...) RICHARD The next day was the most beautiful morning I have ever seen - the sun was magic across the azure sea - I hated it. Why did I hate it? Because I woke up being kissed by Hamilton. God, he was my husband. Why did I have sex with a man I hated - just to get back at the real Cynthia who had sex with my wife. I was worried - it sounded too uncannily feminine to suit me! "Darling! I love you!" he said in his snotty, 'I am better than you' voice. God, do I want to strangle the man, but I find myself dissembling! "I love you, too!" I say, and feel my stomach churning. But if I act too unlike Cynthia, God knows what he in my body will do to my darling Maggie. One thing surprises me - well, I can counterfeit feelings - the reward must come with the chase! All day we worked, and finally the plane was ready. "I hope lightning doesn't strike twice!" I say in the patrician voice I am getting used to. I have changed my clothes to a darling jumpsuit of blue silk - the color of my eyes. If I am going to die today in the takeoff, at least I am going to look good. Cynthia looks gross - why can't the man at least put on fresh underwear? I blush a little, thinking of the flimsy things I am wearing! "Weird thing, darling," says my husband who I hate. He touches me, and I smile lovingly. "Lightning did strike twice - in the air and just after we landed - you and that uncouth Yokum were almost bathed in it. I thought maybe you were dead for a second!" I shiver. 'Richard' looks up from the plane. "I think we're ready to give it a shot!" CYNTHIA God, I look at the jerk Richard. What does she think she's playing at? A trip to Buckingham Palace? She's wearing an outfit I know cost ten thousand dollars - and for what? A do or die attempt to takeoff from the beach. I asked her for help in cleaning filters. But she refused - said she was afraid of ruining her hands! What a woos! The clinging vine in the form of Maggie comes over. God, the woman is so obvious - how could Richard have married a woman like her - sure, I guess she is sexy, but she might as well have 'White trash' tattooed on her butt as a label in a fuckin' store! "Tea time!" I say sarcastically. But my heart is racing. Richard should be flying, not me, but in my body, she doesn't have the strength - plus we would be thought lunatics if we suggested it. The passengers climb in, and Maggie slides in beside me and with her wet lips gives me a sloppy kiss! Yuck! I glance and see Hamilton trying to reassure who he thinks is his beautiful wife, but it's obvious that she is reassuring him - the man is trembling like a leaf - what a coward! Oh well, I married him for his money and social position, not courage. With sweaty hands, I start the engines. They cough and sputter. Fuck! I try again. Fuck - 'Cynthia' suggests I lower the fuel mixture. I tell her to fuck off, I am flying the plane. Hamilton reproves me for talking to his wife in such a fashion. A tangent thought, maybe I should let Richard in my body murder him? I blast the carburetor with extra air and fuel, and hit the igniter. They explode into life. I stand with all my strength on the brakes as I rev up the RPMS, then I let go and the plane roars down the beach, bouncing and tilting every which way! "For God sakes - wheel to the left!" screams Richard in my former voice. Worth a try - that's better - a huge rock looms out of the sand! I pull back on the stick. Fuck! Hamilton shits in his pants, and Maggie screams. We clear it by millimeters! Safely airborne! The sweat is rolling off my forehead into my eyes. Maggie wipes it with a perfumed hankie. I want to gag, but at least I can see. Tahiti is closer, besides, we have a date to grovel with an idol - maybe there is an island priest who can help? "See, I told you my husband is the best fuckin' pilot in the world!" Maggie says proudly. Then "Phew! Mr. Dodge - why don't you use the bathroom in the back, and change and get rid of your underwear." With as much dignity as he can muster (it isn't very much) he staggers to the rear of the plane. I can see the contempt in Richard's blue eyes as she follows her retreating husband. Interesting, the new Cynthia is in exactly the same place I was when I was her with Hamilton as my husband. After what has happened before, the flight and landing are routine. I am pleased to receive hero worship from other pilots and ground crew after out tale is told. Strange, the first time I have been feeling so proud of myself since - well, I guess ever. God damn it! I was a fuckin' hero! RICHARD It is utterly revolting the way everyone is fawning over him and the way he soaking it up. I hear Maggie say what bar they are going to - it looks like an all night celebration! 'Will he even have a head tomorrow?' I think with savage satisfaction. He's out with my hot sexy wife, and the hero worship of the pilots, and what do I have - Oh Joy, Oh Rapture - I have Hamilton Dodge the 6th! How lucky can a girl get! I talk my husband into checking into the local hospital for observation. It wasn't hard - among his many failings is his health, like Moliere's imaginary invalid. This thought brings me up short. How in hell do I know about Moliere - weird! An evening without my husband is a good evening. I put on my evening gown from Paris, and dine elegantly at the Ritz - I even send back the first bottle of Chat Lafite 1959 they bring me - it is corked - the general manager is called in to apologize to the filthy rich Mrs. Dodge, and even pours the wine himself. I smile at him, and think sadonically, 'There's something to be said for having 200,000,000 dollars. I think of my - no, HER mansion home. I shake my head. What the devil is going on here?! A waiter comes up and discreetly coughs, "The old island priest is here, Mrs. Dodge!" "About time!" I crab. I greet the old man in a private room, and give him a thousand dollars. I sound him out on his belief in the supernatural. The old man smiles at me. "I see you are not in the body you were born with," the dignified old man says gently. I almost faint. "The Goddess must have been very angry with the two of you - it has been fifty years since she has done a similar thing - this to an island whore and a visiting seaman." "Did they make it back?" "No." I clear my throat to get rid of my heart, which has jumped within it. "Can we?" He shakes his head. "Your Christian God is a forgiving one. Not our island ones!" I open my mouth to speak, and he hushes me with a gesture. "Do not attempt to bribe Pehle the great - do not ever even think it - I fear for you!" How did he know I was going to do so? He kisses me gently on the cheek, and is gone. Damn! Double damn! Looks like I am stuck. I go into my room (Thank God Hamilton and I have separate bed chambers!) and I look in the mirror. I take stock. I am very beautiful, very, very rich. Horses and servants and yachts. So I will live with it. It is a pity I have to share it with Hamilton! Ah, well - such is life. I think of sex with Cynthia when she was in my old body, and this female body of mine grows wet with desire. Maybe I can use my sensual nature to make Hamilton at least a tolerable bed companion. It was worth a try - never underestimate the power of a woman! I go out for a carriage ride, and see a drunken 'Richard Yokum' and his loving wife and friends, and I find my lips curl at the sight of his drunken revelry. Honestly! The man had no class at all!! CYNTHIA I am having a fuckin' good time - except for the slut, Maggie. I look up and see 'Cynthia' looking down her patrician nose at me. Well, fuck her! The snob doesn't know how to have a good time. Maybe I would pay the lucky woman a visit before we switched back, and show her a good time in bed - I give her this, the woman is a good lay! She beckons me over, distaste in every expression. Well, fuck her! The news sobers me up a little. I break free of the group, and head on out to where the idol rests. I see an old man bowing before the wooden statue. In the moonlight, it seems to him that its smile is smug. Then I feel - something - become aware of me with cruel amusement. Then I am dismissed, as I would a dog or cat. I go back down. Fuck - Maggie will be all over me tonight, and this traitor body won't let me kick her out of bed! A few days later, we continue the charter - only now I am the low-life pilot, and Richard is the snotty rich bitch, married into the best family in Boston! I sure think she has the best of the bargain! RICHARD It feels so weird to be flying as a passenger in my own plane. I look over at the pilot, and sigh. So strong and handsome - such freedom, and married to my sexy Maggie - he sure got the best of this deal! Epilog The new Cynthia took over the reins of the magazine which became even more popular with its new slogan, Sexiness Wins! Some feminists have protested, but who cares - also, designers are pissed because the powerful Cynthia Dodge refuses to show clothes that are unflattering to women! Maggie secretly loves it, and reads it often - especially the part on now to control and manipulate your man - the editor, Mrs. Dodge, really knows men. Still, she is careful to keep the mag hidden from her hubby Richard, as he hates Mrs. Dodge! Hamilton cannot believe the change that has come over Cynthia - he used to dread coming home and listening to her usual dull lectures, but now she is quite a pleasure to be with, and he can't believe how sexy she is now! If anyone has a frigid wife, he tell his friends, crash land on an island - she might undergo a similar sea change. 'CYNTHIA' I still hate Hamilton, but find pleasure in using him as sex toy. Of course, I have other lovers, but being a New York Parker, I am of course discreet. I think I will have to dismiss the butler - I caught the man watching pro football! 'RICHARD' Fuck! Maggie has another kid on the way - this will make five! She is such a low-life, and won't use birth control! Well, I am having my tubes tied - what the slut doesn't know wont hurt her. THE GODDESS NOBODY BUT NOBODY FUCKS WITH ME! (the end)