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Star Light, Star Bright! Players: Roger, Roger's Aunt, Susan. Synopsis "Star light, star bright, first diaper I see tonight!" Susan hummed just a few minutes after eight. Roger was in the lens of her telescope, and like those nights before, laying before his aunt getting pinned into his night diaper. One day, Susan vowed, he'd be lying in front of her, and she would be pinning him into that delightfully fluffy piece of cotton. The only thing she would add, she mused, were a few more accessories. Facts From Fiction I went back into diapers at the age of eight following a bout of bed-wetting that followed the birth of my sister. Mom's approach was pragmatic and discussed with only a small bit of apprehension on my part. Truth was I hated waking in that cold wet bed, and the other truth was I couldn't wait to get put into those diapers and plastic pants. Of course I was already cross- dressing a little by then so my sister and I had a lot in common. I could go on with those accounts, and will someday, but for the sake of this story it's one of the reasons that Roger and Susan come together as easily as they did. Story The platform had taken two weeks to build, but sitting on the roof as it did gave Susan another sixty feet from the ground, and more importantly almost three hundred and sixty degrees of observations. It frightened her mother knowing her daughter sat on the roof that high, but she'd given in to her budding young astronomer. "Jacket please!" Susan's mother said as Susan wolfed the last of her sandwich down while moving for the steps. She got to her new platform from the attic and dormer her father changed into a small door. "What is so important that you've got to hurry?" Her mother added as Susan, stopped, turned and grabbed her thermos of coco. "Mom! Saturn rises soon after sunset during November and remains visible for most of the night. I want to start taking the time lapses by eight!" Susan said making it sound like her mother should have known that. "Of course, why didn't I think of that." Her mother said smiling as she watched her daughter run up the steps. That last was true, but that wasn't why Susan hurried, nor would the pictures she'd take be a time lapse of Saturn this night. She already had a beautiful set of photos of Saturn. What pushed her to that platform so urgently was that house four blocks away, and those time lapse shots of her newest heartthrob. At eight o'clock Roger walked into his room in front of his mother, removed his bathrobe and stood waiting for her to open and ready his diaper. A real baby's diaper or at least the kind of diaper you'd see on a baby. A cloth diaper, and he was powdered before that, with plastic panties following that last diaper pin. A whole set of pictures taken a week ago hurriedly sat in Susan's studio. This set planned. She'd started clicking when she first stood open mouthed at what she was seeing. At first, a naked boy, and that perhaps was reason enough for Susan's mouth to be open, but odd that his mother was in the room with him. A mystery for those first few moments. Curiosity turned to surprise and a bit of shock changing quickly to fascination as he stood patiently while his mother opened a large square pad. The diaper followed from a drawer and Susan shuddered. It wasn't the cold that caused it, as Roger sat down on the white hourglass shape before laying back. He wasn't crying nor doing much of anything other than doing what he had to do so his mother could do what she had to do. He laid back, spread his legs and a moment later, after a lot of baby powder, he was pinned into that diaper. A moment after that he slipped his feet into a pair of plastic panties. His bottom came up, his baby pants went over the diaper and with that done his mother was gone. Roger then stood, and as casually as he might wearing shorts, walked to his student desk and began doing homework. By ten or thereabouts he would walk to his bed, shut the light and leave Susan as fascinated that second week of nights as she had been on that first. Susan did try and understand what she was feeling, but couldn't get past just being turned on by the whole thing. Why that was so wasn't clear, but it was so and that much was very clear. As soon as he lay over his diaper Susan's world grew warm and fuzzy and it got better from that point on. Susan was using a fairly powerful refractive telescope. Unlike her last, this one had a precision coated 120mm achromatic objective lens. Only important to Susan and those like her, but critical if you wanted to see things without risk of distortion. With it's magnifying ability and resolution she could actually detect subtle lunar and planetary features. If conditions were right and night clear she could discern the different rings of Saturn. She could also record them with her 35mm camera that shared space with the eyepiece. She'd gotten the telescope last year and the camera soon after. She hadn't started scanning the world around her till one hazy night when stargazing wasn't going to be worth the effort. Before long she found as much pleasure in those nights roaming the city as she did plotting the heavens. It was only by chance while slewing left to right that she caught Roger than night. With a focal length of 1000mm what she caught had delighted her instantly. A telescope that can show you the details of a ridge on the moon was more than capable of showing Susan all the detail she cared to see. In fact she could even discern the small white elephants shape of his diaper pins his mother used to close the diaper around him. She started clicking her camera immediately. Susan had a dozen albums filled with some spectacular images of the heavens, but none excited her more than the one she started keeping of Roger. She had details of his experience better than what she'd have standing in his room, or at least as good, including some breathtaking close ups. It's what she looked at before bed, and smiled over when she turned her own lights off. Susan wasn't sure if diapering him was what turned her on most, or simply watching his shiny plastic panties and so very puffy bottom refracting his bedroom light as he moved about. What was clear was that he wore them each night, and with some morning observations that followed, she already knew they were there for a reason. He was a bed wetter clearly. Which wasn't so odd in some ways. What was odd was the size of his night things. What he wore was as proportional as a baby might wear given the scale of his diapers and plastic pants when he stood. Far more than she thought he'd need. His bottom stood out distinctly as did the front and sides. It was driving her crazy. Crazy enough that more than one friend asked 'where she was suddenly' when she drifted off at times. Susan found him in the yearbook, but only that years discovering he was four months younger than her and a senior as well. Roger, Susan decided, was one of those middle of the class sorts of boys after some observations in the days that followed. Not a geek nor a jock but one of the majority of students his age in a school that size. She hadn't even known his name for those first few weeks and was careful about it when she finally did. It had taken some time but she'd found his path home and some of his habits and mapped her's to his. Their meeting was as casual as any might be that day in the library. She smiled first, and introduced herself over a light discussion of what he was reading to finally his plans after graduation. Both of them, she discovered happily, would be going on to junior collage right there in town. Susan wasn't sure if she'd ever date Roger had she not known about him. Although, she was sure that she wanted to because she did know about him. What she had planned, because she knew, wasn't clear either, but she had fantasies. Some of those daydreams leaving her shivering for a second or two even in the middle of class. It wasn't his mother either she'd found out. That part caught Susan off guard, as did knowing Roger's mother was in an institution. An accessory after the fact to an armed robbery. A boy friend, Roger said, and his mother was appealing her conviction. So it was his aunt that was diapering him Susan discovered. Of course all of this took a dozen casual dates to come out, but that was the nice thing about casual dates. Susan also came to like Roger on a boy girl level, but she was clear headed on why she was dating him. One day he'd be laying before her, she'd decided, only he'd be nursing a baby's bottle then. It was her telescope that got them together in the evenings, and she was always sure to keep it pointing at the sky when he stood on the platform with her. Roger's house stood four blocks away and Susan allowed him to show her where he thought it was. Fortunately that was said in passing, and forgot ton, as she shared what she knew of the sky Roger was looking at. Susan's house stood on the crest of a small hill that slopped down into town. Behind her another rolling hill and behind that a valley. It was a spectacular view and a good reason to be together on that sturdy platform alone. Their first kiss came when she shared the eyepiece with him tracking a meteor arcing across their part of the sky one night. It was that meteor that pushed the telescope towards the horizon bringing that part of town where Roger lived into the bottom edge of the lens. He moved it further when Susan left for another thermos of coco. Roger found his room while Susan stood watching the water boil and, of all things, his aunt clearly folding his diapers into his drawer. His shock was almost overwhelming. More so as he watched in horror over the detail of what he was looking at. If Susan had ever looked in that direction, and at those particular times... Those times when he was diapered for bed Susan would have seen it all. Roger was quick to bring the telescope back up when Susan came through the dormer. "See any more?" Susan asked taking the ten steps to the roof's peek where the platform stood. It was her casualness that gave Roger his only sense of security. If she knew, Roger thought, she wouldn't have been so casual about it. He was sure of that as he fought for control before saying: "Nope, just that one!" Necking, this night, was out of the question for Roger, and Roger was just able to hang on to his nerve as he said good night. He'd waited an hour before breaching the subject of leaving saying he had a test tomorrow, and would see her at school. The kiss was casual but Susan knew something was wrong. She also knew what it might be and cursed giving him that time alone with her telescope. She knew without a doubt what it was when she slewed to Roger's house, some time later, and found the drapes pulled. It was the first time he'd done that. His room couldn't be seen from the street, nor from any place else without the aid of a telescope like Susan's so it was clear he'd seen what Susan had been seeing, or at least what she might have been seeing. Roger sat in his room trying to focus on his homework, sitting in his diaper and plastic pants like most nights, but now in a robe. He'd pulled the drapes the moment he'd arrived home, and thankfully his aunt hadn't noticed. He also felt lucky to have discovered that exposure before Susan had. He was a mix of concern, fear, foreboding, and oddly enough, excitement over the possibility of being seen like this. That last only a thought. A wondering with an obvious conclusion that if Susan did know she would never have shown an interest in him? He laid it aside convinced by that reasoning alone that she didn't. Girls don't date guys that wet their beds. He'd always had that lingering fear of discovery. Right from the first. Right after his aunt had insisted on him going back into diapers. He'd argued over being put back into diapers, when it was brought up, but the fact was he did sometimes wet his bed. Not always but often enough to make her point valid, and his arguments academic. He'd given in to her demands knowing he had to anyway. What bothered him most, when that time did come, was that his aunt had made them instead of buying something from a pharmacy. She'd made his diapers far too thick and he knew it was on purpose. He also suspected it was why his diaper pins had those little characters on them that she used. Not to mention the fact that his plastic pants were far too loud besides. She wanted him to stop and this was her way of helping him do that. It wasn't going to happen, because what bothered him most was that he liked them. Not at first, or if he did it was overshadowed by his embarrassment, but he did. He hated that part of him that found it so comforting when his aunt said it was time. Exciting, even at first perhaps, but Roger wouldn't admit to that either. Roger's logic simply worked itself to a point suggesting his comfort in wearing such things was more subconscious than conscious. His diapers and noisy plastic pants touched something from his childhood, and thus not Roger the adult. A rational that left him, more or less at ease, over how he was now sleeping. Of course his aunt had made them for the very reasons Roger guessed. She'd looked at what was available but feared that the clinical approach would make him too comfortable enough not to want to stop. She reasoned that looking more like a baby would embarrass him enough to stop. So, with those thoughts, she had picked up a pattern for a baby's diaper, and baby pants. Those baby pants designed with the legs facing forward for a reason. It took some doing to change the sizes from the baby's pattern to the boy, but she'd modified patterns before and it served her well this time. Seven layers of Birdseye cotton, hemmed in a white flat satin edging. Shaped in that hourglass contour was as close as she could get to a real baby's diaper. It was pretty damn close given the pattern she'd used, as were those baby pants that truly looked like baby pants. It was funny in a way when she purchased the plastic. Funny because the woman helping her find the "right" plastic for his panties warned her that the one she wanted might be a bit too noisy. That was exactly what his aunt wanted, and she loved the noise as she fashioned his first pair. She loved that look when the diaper came up between his legs. That smell and noise of his baby pants as well, and some of it had to do with the act of diapering him. It was soothing on a level that both thrilled and bothered her a bit. Pleasing even which also bothered her. He'd argued over her diapering him, but she insisted and, of course, won. She was shaking so badly when she left his room that first night she could hardly stand it. It got better after that, and that might be subjective in some ways because her shaking didn't go away. It was almost painful that waiting till it was time on some nights. It would be another irony that Susan was feeling those same sorts of emotions and cursed those drapes that now blocked her pleasure. Meanwhile Roger was not making any headway with his homework, and he kept lifting his hand away from his baby pants when he found it there again. It seemed to have a mind of it's own, and he smiled suddenly wishing it was Susan's. There is always an odd sense of humor in such things, and all three might have found it that night if they knew what they were sharing in. Roger began thinking that still sitting at his desk. He finished those thoughts lying on his bed. Susan, at nearly that same moment, was looking through Roger's "Baby Album and shuddered herself. Almost exactly near the time that Roger's aunt clicked off her "personal vibrator". She had purchased it long before Roger arrived, and smiled at the box that read: "For the relief of stress: Contoured for personal comfort on those hard to reach places." All three lay with their private thoughts that night. All three smiling. "Hey Roger!" Susan said catching up with him on the way to school. Before meeting him she rode the bus all the way. She got off now a block before Roger's place and made her way to his house for those walks. "Hey Susan!" Roger said feeling his anxiety climb when she appeared. He always talked freely about something after that greeting, but not this morning and another point of confirmation passed. Susan was sure Roger now knew, but given it was Susan, she faced it head on. No better time like the present she decided. "Would it make any difference if I told you it doesn't matter?" Susan said hoping the lack of information would still leave him understanding her subject. If he did know, and she was sure he did, then he was thinking about it as well. "What?" Roger said but making it sound more like shock from a disclosure than a question. "You know!" Susan said and then added: "I mean it doesn't matter. It never did even when I saw you that first time." If Roger wasn't clear on what she meant before, he was now, and his abrupt stop confirmed it. His face glowed almost crimson, and his eyes were searching her's with a touch of fear in them. If she had said boo in that instant he would have bolted left or right like a deer. "Hey, I'm serious. It really doesn't matter!" Susan said putting her hand on his arm. "How long have you known?" Roger asked already resigned to whatever fate awaited him. "Long enough to be able to say that it doesn't matter!" Susan said with emphasis before she smiled slightly and added: "Long enough to be turned on a little by it." There were kids walking past, and their close proximity caused Susan and Roger to pause till they were alone again as Roger spoke: "Are you serious?" "Definitely! Most definitely!" Susan said bending in to kiss him. He didn't kiss back for a time, but did after a time and a weight lifted then. "I can't help it. I mean I've tried but it seems to happen when I'm stressed." Roger said feeling the need to explain it in someway. Susan took his hand and started walking towards school and said: "It's like I said, it doesn't matter." Roger thoughts were swirling at that moment and speechless over this series of revelations. A sense of quiet surrounding them as they walked. A quiet not chilling, but more of a comforting calmness for a bit. Each lost in their thoughts, until Susan said: "Can I ask you something? Personal?" "Personal? Yes!" Roger said with an ironic sort of laugh. It didn't get any more personal that what had already been shared he thought. "Do you like them in some sort of way?" Susan asked. Roger stopped, but only a step before starting to walk again. It wasn't a question he'd thought he'd be asked, so no answer was played out first, but none was needed suddenly and he said: "Some. A little I think. Yes, I guess so." He realized the risk of that answer and added: "I mean I'm kind of use to them I suppose." "But they turn you on a little don't they?" Susan asked sounding hopeful. It was her tone more than the question that made him capable of answering. It was a nice sort of tone that suggested she was hoping for a yes. "Yes." Roger said answering honestly. Truth was Roger was already turned on, and so was Susan. "Think you might be able to handle me putting you into those things someday?" Susan asked almost in a whisper. Roger was suddenly feeling slightly faint or giddy. His legs rubbery. He could hear his heart pounding in his ears and lost his voice as he croaked: "Yes. I mean no! I mean I wouldn't mind, but I'm not sure I'd be able to handle it. I mean I..." Susan had put a finger over his lips after tugging his hand for him to stop and said: "I know what you mean. So is your aunt out for the day?" They stood within sight of the school, but it had drifted out of their focus in those seconds. Most of the world was a blur in those seconds. Cars honked, bells rang in the distance and a siren sounded off near town. None of it noticed by either as Roger said: "Yes!" They turned together and joined hands again walking back to Roger's house. That silence again, but this time it wasn't awkward. There were fantasies forming. Each with their own and slightly different version, but common over what was about to happen. Susan shuddered a bit and matched what Roger was feeling as he walked. His key let them in and their books landed on the floor. Susan didn't know the layout of the old house but she knew where Roger's room was. She led. He followed falling slowly away from the reality he'd had till the door opened. He felt this way when his aunt said it was time. At least after a time. That lack of reality shifting slightly into his fantasy, and he was always a mental baby by the time they reached the top of the steps. He was in that place again and Susan saw his glazed look as she turned to kiss him. Susan knew boys as well as most girls know boys, and she had seen that look before but she also knew this was different given what they were going to do. It was a kind of test question to confirm what she suspected more than a precursor to their roles. She knew there was going to be some sort of role between them. That was almost a given knowing what was about to happen but she asked: "Will you be a baby for me precious?" His face softened instantly and he nodded a yes. He seemed almost catatonic in that state as she walked him down the hall to his room. He was already her baby, she mused, and with that thought shuddered again. It was her third orgasm since catching up to him that morning. She knew there would be more as they reached the door. He was as passive as anyone could be, and for those entire set of moments she took to undress him. Everything was up to Susan. Her motions were hurried but not feverish. There was some amount of pleasure in this part and Susan savored it. More when she moved to his dresser. Susan knew where everything was and brought the changing pad out first. The diaper followed and felt exactly as she imagined. A soft almost spongy softness between her fingers, and so cute. He stood as he had so many times before till she eased him to the bed's edge. Not exactly as before with his aunt, she noticed, making her smile. She smiled wider because if she waited too long he really would need it. He went meekly to the hourglass shape of that diaper and lay back with a soft smile on his own face. Susan, carefully, purposefully, twisted the baby powder open, upending it before she shook it. That smell drifting into both fantasies as Susan rubbed it between his legs. His own hand slipped under her skirt. She flinched slightly at his touch but it was from the pleasure of it. She was incredibly sensitive as was he and she knew instinctively when to stop with his baby powder. She also knew she'd never finish diapering him. A second after her panties fell she straddled him knowing it was ok, this pause. OK, because their passion would build again. The outside world closed around them before their eyes did, and for those few brief seconds nothing mattered. There was sex and then there was sex, and this went just a bit past that. All of those fantasies, each had formed, fell into something incredibly wonderful and impossible to describe. Even as their passion ebb there was that lingering feeling of warmth making you want to hug yourself. It remained with both as Susan stood again, and stayed strong as she brought the diaper up thinking if this really was the reason or not. It was, and she did what she'd wanted to do for all the weeks she'd seen it done. This time though Roger wasn't that fearful young man. His eyes said as much. He was gone from there as that glaze returned with the touch of cotton. He was lost in his own world, she guessed, knowing at some level that there was no adult in those eyes. She pinned his diaper closed, found the baby pants, and added those as slowly, savoring the process itself before the end. They lay together for a time, sharing that time but in their own way and for their own reasons. She at his back and he formed in front of her like two spoons sitting in a tray. Her hand resting comfortably on his baby pants. For a time that hand still. It wasn't after a time. They shared each other within that hour, this time his baby pants and diaper part of their play and every bit as complex and simple as the last. Longer as well and that was more than ok when she closed his diaper around him again. That third time took them to the point of exhaustion, and he'd breast fed his way to that threshold. They left for the day, walking most of it quietly, till they could both return home at the proper time. They window shopped some of it. Her teasing him over some of the baby things she found within the mall. He took the pacifier as her gift promising to have it in his mouth that night when she pointed her telescope at his window. Those pictures would be added to the album soon after, and how delightful they would be she thought as he waved at the small speck of light blinking on the hill. Susan had borrowed two diapers and a pair of plastic pants from the pile held in reserves his aunt kept in his closet. He owned two dozen of those diapers and eight pair of baby pants. They were waiting for him that Saturday morning when he told his aunt he was going to the library. He knew Susan had purchased things because she had said as much. That pacifier he had hidden in his room wasn't needed she'd promised. It was his first baby bottle when he laid over her pink satin spread and his diaper. There were a lot of first that day and he resisted some of it. That quilted satin bed jacket from a thrift store wasn't meant for boy he'd said. A point made before she countered. He wasn't a boy, nor a man and a baby needed a top! Besides, she'd noted, it was powder blue if you ignored the pink satin ribbon that tied it closed. He did, and she tied it closed. Her mother's tennis panties were large enough to be a baby girl's ruffled pair of Rhumba panties when she brought them out. When those did appear it was too late for him to argue against them. He found no reasons, after a time, to argue against any of it, and cuddled her pink plush bear as if he'd owned if for all of his life. He liked the pudding, hated the carrots, and tolerated the rice and beef. He was also torn between the bottle after or her breast. She shared time between both finding that the bottle was more convenient after they made love, and the breast best working up to it. By the time Roger reached home that night there were no fantasies left. Those were replaced with reality. Some of it having gone well past what he'd dreamed. He almost skipped over his memories of that day. He was well past what he could have ever imagined. More than enough to carry him to bed that night. Although, as Roger's aunt diapered him for bed, Susan was in her room savoring her own memories of that day. For her they were as satisfying as with him. Satisfying but not nearly enough as she sat there working on his new dress. She was humming: Star light, star bright, first dress he'll see tomorrow night.... Post Script: Roger's co-worker was a wreck. It showed in his eyes and in the way he slumped into his chair that morning. Roger wasn't and that was clear when they greeted each other. His co-worker suddenly angry as he said: "How the hell can you be so chipper in the mornings with what we face?" Roger smiled and said: "You've got to learn how to separate what you do here and what you do away from here." "Easier said than done." His co-worker said in frustration. Roger nodded in sympathy but thought on what he'd said. It was easier said than done, he mused and almost said as much. Of course his wife, Susan, was a large part of that. Susan and he had started dating as seniors and continued till they graduated. So had that touch of a life style few would understand. Roger's first baby dress was unnerving, but his resistance faltered the moment she threatened not to diaper him if he didn't cooperate. His next dress easier to get into after that. Some of it because he'd grown use to them. Although his cooperation was always rewarded. Roger wasn't sure where he went mentally when he came home, as Susan began his transformations, but he liked being there. Susan herself wasn't sure exactly where she took Roger as she went through those steps, but she knew she enjoyed those trips as much as he did. She also adored Roberta when she finally surfaced. Which wasn't too unlike how Roger's aunt felt when she took her new boarder's hand to walk him to Roger's old room. The End Mary Beth Sanford