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Hi! Im new to writing stories and would love feedback! Feel free to let me know how I'm doing [email protected]. Simon Leery was stressed out and so was his flatmate. Our financial situation seemed to be in the final stages of absolute failure. Neither of us had any money and we were unable to pay this month's rent. Me, having failed engineering uni, I had amassed an impressive 90k debt. My flatmate, studying to be a OR nurse, was 130k in debt. He still needed another 80k in loans for his final year of studies. I had a job as a burger flipper and I was working double shifts and still not getting enough money. My flatmate couldn't get a job because it would have to be part time and few places were looking and I was struggling because of my failed education, inexperience and young age. I had just turned 19 and my flatmate and childhood friend was 20. We moved in together when I failed my school and he got dumped by his girlfriend so it just made sense. Now, rent was due yesterday so we still had a few days or a week before the landlord started hounding us. Problem was, this wasn't the first month we were late for payments, in fact, it was the fourth consecutive month. We were on thin ice. "Dude, what the hell are we going to do? My student support for this month is gone.. We are 300 short for rent and then we need an additional 200 for the loan payments this month, not to mention food, phone and internet payments for this month." My roommate was talking as if it was up to me to fix the situation. Stress was understandable and as this seemed to be a monthly occurrence, it was getting really annoying and to make matters worse, I don't think we had ever been quite this broke before. We needed at least 600 to be able to survive this month. "I don't know. I'm working double shifts, I feel like I am going to burn out if I keep doing it." "Have you looked for other employment? I mean, really looked? There has got to be an office temp job or something that pays better. What about that medical research I told you about? Did you check out the link?" My flatmate, Chris, had told me about a medical research that would supposedly pay a lot of money for test subjects. Chris had mentioned it many times now, to a point of annoyance. I was not keen on testing some prototype drugs. Getting cancer for a small amount of money did not seem worth it. "Uuh, I have been looking for work. You know I have, no one is hiring, not for decent pay. Getting an office job would require working for free for at least 6 months probation and I, we, cant afford me not getting paid for six months." Chris noticed my lack of response about the medical study. "What about the drug testing? Dude, I've mentioned it enough to understand that you are uncomfortable with it but we need the extra cash. I would go for it but you know students aren't allowed to take part in them." I was getting more annoyed now but I couldn't think of a reason to say no flat out. "Alright! Fine, I will check it out. I still have the link saved on my browser." My statement was more in defeat than annoyance. The talking stopped and we both went into our own rooms. I went to my computer and opened the browser, I figured I better check out the link in case Chris asks me about later. 'Omnilos Medical' - Government funded and supervised medical research Blah blah blah, there was tons of text about the corporation needing willing people for medical research and drug testing. Documents about how the media made it seem more dangerous than it actually was and safety. I skipped most of it but one big banner stopped me. It seemed like an advertisement more than a medical study. In big bold letters it stated an urgent need for medical test subjects but what really stopped me was the 1000 dollars per month payment for participants. 'Shit, one thousand dollars a month?' Was the thought running in my head. Before I knew it, I had clicked the apply button and was filling in my personal information. It took me a long time to fill the application and there were a lot of questions about my medical history. Then there was a 30 page document which I was strongly advised to read before continuing but it seemed like a EULA agreement, a bunch of legal jargon. I skipped to the end of it and clicked accept. The last message was for me to wait for my application to be reviewed and I would receive an email in a few days about how to proceed. I closed my browser and chuckled by myself on how quickly I got over the fear of being an experimental drug tester when the money they would pay was good enough. '1000 bucks a month... man, I hope I get in.' I thought as I booted my favorite game and tried to ignore the stress of having no money and having to get up for a 3 AM shift flipping burgers. --- TWO DAYS LATER --- Coffee, ramen noodles, the burger that I stole from work, barely any sleep, masturbating in the shower before Chris got home, playing games and two double shifts. A lot can happen in two days but for us, it didn't involve money. I asked my boss for an advance and he laughed at me. Chris tried to borrow money from his friends, they were broke too. Chris got cornered in the hall by our landlord and thus, a deadline was set. If we didn't have rent money by the 15th, we had to be out of the flat before the end of the month. I had told Chris about sending my application to the medical study and he said he hoped I would get in. I had been home since noon, having pulled a night shift and doing another shift in the evening, I was browsing porn on the internet, trying to ignore the stress and hopelessness of our situation. I found a nice hardcore clip of two lesbians trying to break theirs strap on dildoes when my computer gave me a notification. 'Omnilust Inc' - Application for medical research. Dollar signs flashed past my eyes and I stopped the porn, adjusted my boner in my boxers and opened the email. Dear Simon, We are looking for people who would be willing to participate in a medical experiment. You have been chosen to participate because you are a healthy male in your 20's. When you are out of money, small things can feel like you have been given another chance. I smiled when I read the email, I had been pre approved for the research. I skipped most of the text in the email but I understood the following; they liked my application and would like to see me for a full medical check up before admitting me as a research subject. There was a link to their google schedule where I could book my medical exam date and it had an open slot for tomorrow. I reserved a time for myself for midday and immediately sent a text message to Chris about it, he was still at school. His response was: 'Fucking aces, dude! Nice job! Go and get yourself in that program!' I mean, we weren't out of the woods yet, I hadn't been promised any money but I still got up from my computer, did a small victory dance and went into the shower with my boner in my hand. I edged twice and then erupted into the shower drain. I loved masturbating, have loved it every day ever since I was 12 and I am sure when I get my first serious girlfriend, sex will be just as awesome. For the rest of the day I felt better, even with the threat of eviction in less than two weeks away. I even went to work in the evening with a smile. When I got home after midnight, I managed to see Chris just as he was going to his room to sleep. He gave me a thumbs up and wished me luck for tomorrow's medical exam. I went into my room, crashed on my bed and barely managed to set the alarm for the morning before falling asleep. I woke up at ten, Chris had already left for school so my morning started with coffee, shave and a shower wank. I was very happy to find out the medical exam facility was close, only 30 minutes with a bus. When I arrived at the office district I saw the building and it was a fancy looking office block. Huge building with big windows but no company logo. Many firms are probably renting offices here and when I got to reception and had to state the name of the company to the cute reception girl, it was confirmed. I was told to take the elevator to the basement which didn't ring any bells in my head but rational thinking would have told me that they weren't renting the most expensive offices. I took the lift down and immediately realized that I was underground, it was still a nicely decorated long corridor but there were no windows. I walked for a good distance before I reached a door labeled 'Omnilust Inc', it was a paper taped to the door. I knocked, waited for less than ten seconds and I could hear footsteps on the other side. The door was opened by a middle aged woman dressed in usual office attire. She welcomed me in, confirmed my identity and told me to go to the waiting area where I would be called by name for the check up. As I got to the waiting area with sofas and chairs, I immediately noted the two other people waiting there. They were young like me, probably students. One was skinny like me, barely any meat on his bones, the other was a slightly overweight kid, he looked young due to the slight overweight. No one spoke, everyone was staring at the floor or on their phone so I mimicked them when I sat down. Time passed, my battery ran low so I pocketed my phone. A door opened and a nurse called a name, it wasn't mine. The skinny kid stood up and walked in the door and it was closed. The silence continued. Another door opened and my name was called "Simon Leery." I stood up and made my way towards the open door where my name was called through. As I walked through and closed the door behind me I saw an attractive nurse sitting on a stool raising her gaze from a chart to meet mine. We exchanged a quick greeting, I confirmed my identity by handing over my ID card and she asked me to sit down. The whole process got off on a very professional pace. She asked me all kinds of medical questions, making notes on the computer all the while. She asked me if I had participated in medical testing with any other companies as this was my first participation with them, to which I responded 'no'. She was happy to hear this as it would have been the first eliminating factor. Everything from allergies to STD's was asked and I was told not to lie as before I was accepted to the study I would have to give them access to my full medical records. It took a good twenty minutes for her to finish her questions and she seemed content with the information I was providing. At this point she handed me a legal document and explained it would give them the right to see my medical, tax and legal history. I scanned it over, it seemed to be in order so I signed it and handed it over to her. She took the paper with a smile and said that the questionnaire seemed to be in order and they would like to proceed to the medical exam. I was told to strip naked behind a paper screen and put on an examination gown. As I was getting undressed the nurse explained the process to me. "Mr. Leery, you have had a physical before but you should know this will be a more in depth examination. We have to get a good baseline of your physical condition before approving you for the trial so we will do a full body check up, including glands, testicular and prostate. We would be taking blood, semen, stool and urine samples along with three needle aspiration biopsies. One biopsy from your prostate, one from testicles and the third from your marrow. Additionally we will need a erec...- " I was naked behind the paper screen, just starting to pull on my examination gown. My eyes were as big as saucers and cold sweat started to run down my back as I listened to the nurse talk. She seemed to go on forever but my mind was stuck on the prostate exam. I knew what it was and I had heard a few jokes of what older men have to go through. I shook my head and tried to tell myself it's a routine medical procedure and I shouldn't worry about it. I finished donning my gown and heard her ask if I would be okay with all of this and if yes, she had another legal document for me to sign before the medical tests would begin. With nervous steps I walked around the paper screen and took the document into my shaking hand. I was told it was a standard liability release form for medical procedures. I looked at it and I had become too nervous to read it properly. I swallowed and spit seemed to linger in my throat as the realization started to sink in. I would willingly submit to a battery of tests, hoping they would clear me to become a part of the medical testing so I could possibly, maybe, get some money out of it. For a moment I thought if this would be worth it, then I remembered the rent, the bills, the loans... I wrote my signature on a piece of paper for the second time and my hand was shaking slightly. A full two hours later I was a changed man. I was behind the paper screen, still blushing, sore, annoyed and hoping the ground would open up and swallow me whole as I with my now trembling hands was trying to get dressed in my own clothes. Never in my life had I been this thoroughly examined. I was weighed, measured, rubbed, poked, pinched and humiliated. I felt like it had been days, like I had been reduced from a human being into a laboratory animal. I thought the prostate exam would have been the worst part but fuck me was I wrong. I learned very quickly that this woman was not a nurse, she was a doctor. Because after all the basic examinations she prodded her finger in my ass and I thought the worst part was over. Then she took every possible measurement of my penis, which was weird. Then came a stool sample, then urine, then blood and I was already at a point where I really wanted to just go home. But no, after less than an hour I came out of the toilet and handed her my semen sample with blushing cheeks. I felt like I was being stripped to my basic elements. I hoped, no, I prayed it was over but before I could even rest from my orgasm I was on the examination table, lying on my side and was given a barium enema. When I came out of the bathroom, having evacuated my bowels for the second time, now with 90% liquid content I was once again on the examination table. This time a camera tube snaked its way into my rectum. I felt like crying. If you have never had a colonoscopy, it is an embarrassing experience. They pump air into your rectum in order for the camera to see better and it has small tweezers to take surface biopsies and a needle for deeper ones. It hurt, it was uncomfortable and once the tube left my rectum, having uncomfortable gas is the least of your worries. The doctor was satisfied with my colon examination and prostate biopsy and proceeded to the testicular biopsy. Local anesthesia saved me from the pain but as I had two testicles, one biopsy was two needle pricks. I was exhausted, debased and mortified after this. And nearing two hours of poking, prodding and needles, I was lying on the exam table on my side, hugging my knees as a needle poked my spine and they took a marrow sample. It was almost three hours later that I left the building. I spent 30 minutes sitting on a toilet trying to recover from the hellish ordeal. I was walking weird as my backside, my lower back and my testicles were sore and I had an ungodly amount of gas. I got on the bus to take me home, carrying a thick folder of documents. I was told it contained an info package that would better prepare me for the clinical trial if I was accepted in. I glanced at the contents of the folder while I was in the bus but I was far too tired, irritated, humiliated and debased to make any sense of it. I pulled my hood up and tried to imagine myself to another planet. Thank god I didn't have to go to work tonight as I had a note from the doctor ordering me to rest, reason; biopsy. I got off the bus and started to make my way home. When I got home, Chris was there and he had a surprise for me. He had bought a six pack of beer with money he had loaned from a schoolmate, so it had not made a dent into our rentmoney. He was asking me a lot of questions about the trial and I told him I didn't know much. I showed him the folder but being a full time student, he was not interested in doing any extra reading. He also asked me about the physical exam, knowing a thing or two about it as he was studying to be a OR nurse but I did my best to downplay the details. Basically I told him it was a routine exam and left out all of the intrusive stuff. Chris being the great friend that he is, he let me down 4 of the six beers to congratulate me and hoped I got in the clinical trial. I quickly got wasted as I had not consumed anything but two cups of coffee today, I had been given local anesthesia, painkiller pills and even my colon was empty after the enema. The mixing of the alcohol and drugs quickly got me puzzed and my guard lowered as I became much more relaxed. I hope I would have realized my intoxicated condition sooner but I was not so lucky. Chris and I started cracking jokes, talked about girls and somewhere along the line Chris made a joke about me still being a virgin at 19 years of age, I messed up. Normally my retort was to tell him to fuck off and that I was working on loosing my virginity but tonight, drunk off my ass, having been physically invaded earlier today by a hot doctor my response was: "I may be a virgin in the front but I think technically Im not a virgin in the back anymore." Followed by an awkward laugh from me. I glanced at Chris and he was looking at me like, well, like I had had way too much to drink, which was the case. But as my joke did not get a laugh out of him, I felt like I owed him an explanation. I told him about the good looking doctor and her finger. Now that got a laugh from Chris, especially when he realized that I was too embarrassed to talk about it earlier. He told me it's nothing to be embarrassed about as it was a routine medical procedure. Chris even told me he had done his fair share of them. But he further downplayed my joke by saying that I was a virgin still in the front and the back. That sparked a debate whether lesbians could ever lose their virginity by Chris's standards and when we agreed that anal virginity could be lost much easier but only in a sexual context and not medical, I laughed and said "Thank god, 'cos then the enema and the footlong camera that she shoved up my backside also didn't take my butt virginity!" Now this had Chris rolling on the floor, howling in laughter. He wiped his tears and told me to come clean. I told him about everything that happened in the medical exam and even he was surprised by the amount of tests I went through. We concluded the evening and retired to our own rooms when my speech became too slurred to be understood. The next morning I woke up with an aching head and a sore backside as it was still sore from the doctors treatments. I had to go to work today so painkillers and water would have to work their magic. Even if last night's evening was fun, I tried not to think about the embarrassing details I shared with Chris as we greeted each other over morning coffee. Work was a welcome distraction for the next few days. CHAPTER 2 The rentmoney was due on the 15th. Today was the 7th, we had one week to get the 300 bucks we were short for. Me and Chris both called our parents, begging for money. I had no luck, Chris got 130 from his folks. In the evening as I was on my way home from work flipping burgers, I got a phone call. It was Omnilos Medical. Actually it was the same doctor that had done my examination. "Mr. Leery. I'm happy to inform you that we would like to enroll you on our medical testing program. The tests all came back good and your physical condition is good enough to become a test subject. Some values on your blood test were low but we will provide all the necessary supplements in the program." For a brief moment I was reminded of the exam, the humiliation I felt. I wondered if I could go back to see this doctor. Then I remembered Chris saying that they are standard medical procedures and that I shouldn't feel ashamed about it. But what the doctor said next, made me feel better. "Given your age, your application and location, which is close to our laboratories, we are keen to enroll you on our highest paying clinical trial. This would require a commitment from you and a minimum of two visits per week to our facilities for the foreseeable future. We understand that it is asking quite a lot from our test subjects, which is why we pay the 1000 dollars per month reward for participation. Payments can be done weekly if necessary but this program also requires a commitment of a minimum of 6 months." WOW! For every week you stay, you'll get paid. I know that they will also provide me with all my nutrition and some place to stay but Chris and I really need that money! My mouth was gaping. 6000 bucks guaranteed if I took part in their medical trial. That along with my burger flipping, I would actually make a decent living. Or better yet, I could quit the shitty job and concentrate on finding a new one, though the 1000 a month alone wouldn't be enough. And to top it all off, if I can get money weekly, there should be just enough time to get my first payment before the landlord gives us the axe! I realized time was the issue here and I asked the doctor about it. "I hope you understand but the reason I applied for this medical trial is because I am financially in a difficult situation. Is it possible to fast track this so I can get my first payment next week or sooner?" "Uhm, I am sorry for your situation but it would be quite unorthodox to have you get started so quickly..." My anxiety grew as I listened to her. I didn't want to beg but I felt compelled to do all I could. "Doctor, I understand that there are procedures that must be followed but if I can't get some help soon, I'm pretty sure I won't be able to participate as I will need to move homes." The doctor eased off and sounded much more sympathetic as she spoke. "Your situation is truly that bad? Alright, stay on the line please. I will consult my colleagues about this." The silence on the phone felt eternal and the moment felt like my future was on the line. If she can, she will save me and my flatmates' future.. If she can't help me get started sooner, I'm probably going to have to move states back to live with my parents. I heard the phone move on the other end and heard her inhale. "Right, Mr. Leery, are you still there? Good. I spoke to a colleague and as it happens, we do have one trial starting tomorrow. Now before we agree on anything, you need to understand a few things..." We spent a long time on the phone. I was so happy I could have burst. I was so happy I was barely paying any attention to what she was saying! I could start tomorrow but there were a few obstacles in my way. I would have to be at the facility at 6 tomorrow morning. The trial itself would start at 9 AM but I would need to be early so they can brief me on everything. I promised the doctor that I would be there, even though I knew in the back of my head I may have to burn some bridges. You see, I had agreed to work two shifts tomorrow at the burger joint and the only way this could work is if I got rid of those shifts. I made a nervous phone call to my boss. It did not go as I hoped it would. My boss got quite angry when I flat out refused to come to work tomorrow: "Listen here, you little shit. You think I can't find someone to replace you? You already skipped a shift with your medical leave bullshit. Either you show up tomorrow or then you don't show up at all. If you don't show up, don't even think about getting your salary for the shifts you have worked at the start of the month, I have footage of you stealing food." The phone was hung up. Fuck, I would have to weigh my options although I promised the doctor I would be there tomorrow. Then again, I also made a commitment to flip burgers. I headed home, updated Chris on the situation and consulted his opinion. "Shit, that is a bad situation to be in, dude. But If I understood it correctly, I think the medical trial is your better option. Fuck, I think its our only option. Think about it.. If you do it, we get money for rent on time. You get to quit a job you hate working. Okay, we might be screwed for next month's rent but that is a problem for next month." I was a little shocked by what he said but I agreed with Chris, the medical trial was the better option and considering rent, it was the only option. I went to bed with mixed feelings. I was nervous about the medical trial, sad that I would be unemployed tomorrow and maybe a little happy that I wouldn't have to flip burgers anymore. CHAPTER 3 I woke up at 4:30 AM, sneaking silently around the flat so I wouldn't wake up Chris. I cleaned myself up as best I could, had a cup of coffee and left the apartment. The bus ride in the early morning felt very long. I was on pins and needles and it felt like the last 24 hours had turned my world upside down. I tried to focus on the positive, especially on the fact that in approximately one week, rent would be paid and there should be enough money to maybe even spend a little. Eventually my stop came, I got off the bus and made my way inside the laboratory. I thought I would meet just the doctor but there were 4 people waiting for me in the lobby. We made introductions, headed to an office and sat down. In the office there was one unemployed sad sap; me, one lawyer in an expensive suit, two doctors, and what I could only describe as a corporate suit. The doctor, my doctor, started first. "Right. Mr. Leery, we are happy to see you here. Since we spoke yesterday, we have had to move a few mountains to make it possible for you to start the clinical trial today. First off, your marrow sample has been sent forward and its processing has been expedited greatly. The legal documents needed have been prepared through the night and all the necessary documentation has been done to allow you to partake in the trial. We only have a few hours to go through the details so for your sake, I hope you studied the folder that was given to you in great detail. The program you are taking part in is the CRISPR/P1 preliminary program. You read the material about it?" I put on my best poker face and said yes. I wasn't about to ruin this opportunity just because I hadn't done my homework. "Good. So you understand the concept of the trial and the possible, pre approved side effects?" I swallowed uncomfortably but did my best to keep my poker face. I nodded. "You are okay with all of them? In order to participate, you accept that the pre approved side effects, if occurring, won't be compensated and are most likely permanent?" In my head I was cursing the lack of details. I didn't know the side effects. I didn't know what the trial was about. Yet, I nodded, I needed to be in this program. "Great. I will let legal take over now, we need to get the signatures quickly as they need to be faxed to our headquarters and need to be signed before we can begin. So time is of essence here and it's good you have familiarized yourself with the trial." This time I gulped and did my best to keep my composure. I was about to sign documents about a clinical trial I knew nothing about. My head was filled with horror images. Cancer, growing a third leg. Death. But, I needed money. I needed to be in this trial. I nodded affirmatively and the lawyer started. "I won't go over the exact laws that are in play here but in the CRISPR/P1 preliminary trial, you will be among the first 20 test subjects, helping in research in a revolutionary field of medicine. In legal terms, human genome alteration is banned by federal laws but in this state, since the beginning of this year, a law has been passed that allows such testing. In order to conduct the testing, the participants must forgo certain rights willingly and that is the reason we have us four here and this meeting is recorded, both audio and visual. Normally this whole procedure would be conducted with the subject, Simon Leery, personal legal advisor present but due to the nature of the situation, Mr. Leery is willing to forego that right?" The lawyer looked at me, expecting an audible answer. I clumsily responded "Yes." The lawyer looked at me and gestured to me to keep going. "I, Simon Leery, choose to be here without legal counsel." The lawyer seemed satisfied. He handed over a document to me, it was multiple pages. "This is the legal agreement you will need to sign in order to proceed. I will go over the main parts in layman's terms for the recording of this session. Please stop me if I am going too fast. The document you are about to sign restricts your rights in multiple fields. You waive your right to seek compensation in additional sums other than what is listed, which I will not go over now due to time restrictions. You waive your rights to sue Omnilust Incorporated. You agree to a legally binding NDA and you willingly accept the sums you will be required to pay should you fail to abide by the NDA. You waive your right to not have a DNR and you waive your right to accept surgery or to make medical decisions on your own body. If deemed necessary, or if your mental capacity is brought to question as a result of the trial, you agree to be placed in legal custody to Omnilust Incorporated..." Suddenly I felt dizzy. I wanted to stop him but every time I thought it sounded bad, it got worse. I felt like I was about to vomit. It was hard for me to pay attention. I wanted to go home. The Lawyer kept on going but all I heard was a distant voice. Somewhere along, I snapped back into reality. "..You understand the listed pre-approved side effects. You waive your right to appeal the contract since you, Simon Leery, requested the expedited schedule. You understand and approve everything stated in this document?" I think I missed most of it. Yet, in front of me there were 4 people, all expecting me to give a response. I slowly nodded my head feeling like I was being led to slaughter. The lawyer sighed. "Please state audibly that you understand and approve everything stated and written in the document." "I understand. And I approve. Simon Leery." I felt like an idiot or a retard saying it like that. I couldn't correct it either as the corporate suit took over. "Alright, good. We are ahead of schedule, great. You now have 35 minutes to go through the contract on your own, we will give you the room. You accept the limited time, even if normally such restrictions wouldn't be allowed?" My legs were shaking under the table. I nodded. And quickly added "Yes." Everyone except me stood up and walked out. My doctor stated one her way out. "Please make the most of the time you have and study the document. After you sign it and the corporate signs it, you will be legally and financially prohibited from exciting the medical trial." The door closed and I was alone. Have you ever fucked up so bad that waiting for the axe to fall feels like an eternity? I looked at the clock, I swear, one second was one hour. My mind was on warp speed. I was going to allow a corporation to take legal custody of me if they thought I was mentally challenged by the trial? I felt like there was no turning back. I knew the cameras were recording every second of this so I thought I must get to work. I started going through the contract, tried to make every second count. It was more than 20 pages, tiny font, legal bullshit. My only hope was to skim. Read every other sentence or go through all the headers. I started with that, headers. Legal, right, personal, medical, testimony, compensation... I stopped at compensation, started reading it. Holy fuck-a-molly! They would pay me for side effects?! stage 3 cancer - 8 million, amputation - 5 million, loss of hearing - 3 million, loss of eyesight - 4 million... The list was huge! And the smallest listed sum was 1,5 million. Christ, silver linings! I glanced at the clock. The fuck?! 15 minutes had passed?! I got back to the headers; payments, NDA, sanctions, waivers, termination.. I read on termination. It stated I was not allowed to stop my participation in the trial for the minimum period of 6 months. Only if both parties involved agreed on it, I would be allowed to stop. I'm not sure but I think it also states that if I stop without Omnilos Medical approval, I agree to a prison sentence? And repayment? God damn this legal mumbo jumbo, it was making my head hurt. I looked at the time again. I could hear the second hand ticking on the clock on the wall as every pounding strike hammered my fate to the document. I had 40 seconds left. I stared at the clock until I heard the door open and the four people walked in again. "Well, from what we saw, you used your time effectively. You were practically glued on those pages." I looked at the lawyer who was speaking with a dead stare. I was beginning to lose grasp on reality. What the fuck had I gotten myself into? "So, Mr. Leery? Are we ready to sign?" I kept staring. My mouth was dry. I tried to rationalize this whole thing. Maybe this was all in my head, I was making elephants from ants.. Or however the expression goes. Maybe this was all my fault, I didn't read the folder, I wasn't prepared for this. Maybe the legal mambo jambo just seems scary but it isn't all that bad in reality? It's possible, right? It felt like I had been sitting there, silently contemplating for hours, when it had actually been mere seconds. I thought about rent, bills, loans, unemployment and my friend Chris. After all, he would be screwed too if I messed this up. I felt my head nod slowly, it was the most out of body experience I have had to that point in life. The first signature on the first page felt like I was carving granite. The second signature on the second page felt like my arm was paralyzed. The third felt like I was writing on air. After ten signatures I was committed. I was beyond that, in for a penny, in for a pound. I made it this far, how bad could it be? In my mind I was desperate to make this whole situation seem rational but my mind was far from any rational thoughts. The lawyer took the document and stood up to leave. "We will get you a copy as soon as we fax this. Thank you for your cooperation mr. Leery." Everyone left except my doctor and myself. She looked at me, seeming concerned. "Are you alright, Simon? I hope you don't mind me calling you Simon?" "No, Simon is fine. I uhh.. I have a bit of a dry mouth." She stood up and got a pitcher of water and a glass. She filled the glass and placed both the glass and the pitcher in front of me before sitting down again. "I know the document seems intimidating, you are not the first to be nervous to sign it. Your draft was more strict in legal terms due to the schedule, which once again, you requested. Are you sure you are okay with all of this? You seem.. Overly stressed." I took a big gulp of water to ease my dry mouth. I coughed awkwardly and did my best to seem accepting of the whole situation. "Yeah, of course. The legal text is always a bit jarring but me okay. I'm okay, is what I mean. Meant to say, I mean." She didn't believe me. "Are you absolutely sure? If there was ever a time for you to back out of this, now is the time." I shook my head "No.. uh, no. I'm good." She tilted her head a little bit. "Okay. So you are ready for the trial. You read the folder, you know the program you are in?" I nodded nervously. "You know you will be subjected to weekly prostate exams?" She was bluffing? She was trying to trap me? No, the cameras! The cameras were still on! She wouldn't lie here. So, weekly prostate exams was not a lie. Shit. Fuck. Shitfuck. I nodded "Yup. I read the folder." My hands were sweating. She continued. "So you are fine with the required enemas, the limited diet, the possible surgeries, the schedules, biopsies, overnight monitoring? You know all of this?" She was watching my reaction intently. I felt my eye beginning to twitch, I caught it with a weird eye rub and kept nodding, all the while feeling like she was the Grim Reaper, coming to collect my soul. "..uh, Yup." "And you are aware of the possible side effects, some of which are pre- approved and won't be compensated for? Like you said you were? The increased libido? Increased seminal and sperm production, prostate hyperactivity, prostate cancer? Intermittent impotence? Insomnia, headaches, possible hallucinations, trouble focusing, nymphomania, incontinence, irrational behaviour and last but not least, likely involuntary ejaculation?" I wanted to scream. I wanted to jump out the window. I wanted to commit a crime so the police would come and take me away. Rationalize! Side effects, like on painkillers.. They are always over dramatised! She is just trying to freak you out! Stand your ground man, one thousand bucks a month, baby! My inner monologue screaming gave me little hope. With shaky renewed faith, I nodded my head yet again. "Yup. F-familiar with all of that." I wanted to bite my own tongue off. She smiled faintly. "And you know that you will be taking experimental CRISPR gene altering spine injection to mutate your prostate to be theoretically complication and cancer free forever?" That didn't sound so bad. I nodded. "And you know for the minimum duration of 6 months with a possible extension up to and including 4 years in case of complications, you agree to be physically prevented from ejaculating the usual way?" She stared at me. Is that a hint of a smile I see? What the fuck? This had to be a joke. I blinked. "Uhm.. uhh, what? Physically prevented?" "It was all stated in the folder. In order to maintain chemical balance and keep producing steady results, test subjects will be prevented from masturbating by physical means. The prostate is heavily connected to the male orgasm and this is the only way to conduct the testing. You must know all this? Don't get me wrong, we need young test subjects so I am not trying to scare you here, I'm concerned for your well being and that you understand what you are getting into." I wanted to dry heave. Instead I felt myself keep up the facade, I nodded. Fuck it, Im dead anwyay it seems.. Might as well become a guinea pig. She smiled and nodded in return. "Okay. Perfect, if there are no problems with your contract, you will be processed in one hour. You can stay here if you'd like, there is coffee and water on the side table and the toilet is at the back of the room." She stood up, got her purse and extracted a tube of lotion and placed it on the table. She looked at me like I was a lamb headed for slaughter. "It's scented, hope that's not a problem but it will make.. If you want to.." Now she was blushing! "I mean, 6 months is a long time." As she said it, she motioned towards the bathroom and left. I seriously considered jumping out of the window at that point. 'Prevented from ejaculating the normal way?! 6 months?! Up to 4 years?! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! I felt like fainting, like having a panic attack. If I faked a heart attack they couldn't do this to me, right? Holy shit and the nerve of that doc, suggesting I go masturbate..'- I was already in the bathroom, tube of lotion in hand and the door locked. I may have been scared out of my mind but never has an attractive female given me lotion and suggested I masturbate. And I tell you, as I undid my jeans, lowered my boxers, it was the weirdest masturbation session ever! Don't get me wrong, I can get worked up pretty fast and pretty much just touching my cock gets me ready but I had also just sat through the weirdest meeting of my young life. I slowly pulled back my foreskin and as precum was starting to leak, I tried, I really tried to think of something sexy but all that was going through my mind was the last two hours. Legally binding, prostate exams, enemas?! The doc's lotion smelled nice, smelled like her.. Or does she smell like the lotion? Maybe I can still get out of this? Yeah, there can't be a contract that you can't get out of somehow, given good enough reason? Fuck, concentrate man! I was losing the hard on and I tried to focus on the first sexy thing that popped in my head. What did she mean by listing nymphomania as a side effect? Isn't every 19 year old male pretty much a nympho already? Shit! Come on! Focus! My arm was getting tired now and I tried to switch to my left hand, awkward unrhythmic jacking off ensues. Ok ok, the doc is sexy! She smells nice, probably gets paid a lot of money, she was nice to me! I wonder if I would have a chance with her? Maybe a nice dinner and then we go to her place and I show her my ungodly talents as a woman pleaser! Oh yeah! Here we go! This is working, time to switch gears. I changed back to my right hand and really started going at it. Then the image of me lying on my side on an examination bed with her finger in my ass popped into my head. Fuck you imagination!! I'm not stopping! Where there is a will, there is a way! My right bicep was burning but I beat it and I beat it good. I couldn't shake the image of her fingers in my butt but I didn't care, at least it didn't hurt. Ok, here we go.. I can feel it rising. Oh mama! Come on, blow the load already! It has never been this hard! Suddenly I thought about the barium enema and the smell of it all when evacuated. No! Please, no!! Then I thought about the camera tube in my ass and the air being pumped in me and how uncomfortable it was. No, back to the doctor, come on!! I felt like crying now, I was desperate to cum! I stopped and let out a sigh of desperation. If there was one thing I needed right now, it was to cum. My late teenage brain was thinking of little else, my balls were boiling. I need this! I need this small victory after the shit I was just put through!! I took out my phone and turned mobile data on. I immediately went to pornhop and tried to maintain an erection. I was losing it. Jesus H! I know the side effects listed impotence but I haven't even been given any drugs yet! Focus man!! I started rubbing the tip and tried my best to block out any and all negative thoughts. I quickly clicked through the recommended list trying to find a video that got me horny. What was the name of that lesbian clip I saw the other day? Damn it! Ok, here we go 'Girls first time', sounds good! Skip the intro and small talk, that's good. Let's do this! I set the phone down on the edge of the sink and even though my right arm was still burning, the video was giving me renewed faith. I started slowly pulling on my cock, trying to maintain a nice strong pace and just enjoy it. Come on right arm, little bit longer! It was really starting to hurt now, both my arm and my cock. As I felt heat rising from within me and was starting to pant and sweat profusely.. It was coming, this is happening. I need to cum. Oh yeah baby! Here we go! --- I heard the door open in the conference room and I heard talking. Then I heard the doctor call out. "Mr. Leery, are you ready to go?" Motherfucker!!! I cursed in my head. How the fuck did an hour pass already?! My knees almost gave out. Not now, just a moment more and I could have cum! But it happened, just as I couldnt pee in public urinals, it seems I couldn't masturbate with people listening. My arm had already given out and my cock was already wilted, smeared with feminine smelling lotion and so much precum. I wanted to cry. I wanted to cum! CHAPTER 4 --- BECOMING A TEST SUBJECT --- An hour had not passed. they had returned to the conference room immediately after receiving a signed copy of the agreement. I stood there like an idiot, sweat still on my forehead and I could smell the lotion all over myself. They gave me a copied version of the agreement and we said our goodbyes, they all wished me success in the drug trial and we all shook hands. My doctor said goodbyes last and I stealthily handed over the lotion back to her. She let out a little laugh and said I can keep it. Made me feel like an idiot. As we all left the conference room, there was a nurse waiting for me outside. Before I knew what was going on, the 4 people had vanished and me and the nurse were walking the corridors. "Right, Mr Leery. Welcome to Omnilust drug trials. I will talk you through a few key points but as you don't have the time for a full orientation day, we will need to keep it brief. All patients are assigned codes that they will go by inside our laboratories. I know it may seem immoral but anonymity within drug trials is key. The computer assigns these codes per patient and decides who is placebo and who is on the actual drug. I know this is a preliminary trial but we are doing a simultaneous trial for effects as CRISPR/P1 is a highly irregular test. Your code is.." She quickly opened the folder and glanced at it as we were walking. "015. You will need to remember this code but don't be too worried about it for now, it will be in all the documents that you receive today. In fifteen minutes we will all start at the auditorium, the head doctor will speak after which everyone will be called by their codes to examination rooms. One thing, Mr Leery, you haven't had a chance to fill a questionnaire about the trial so I will need to ask a few questions now, is that alright?" I tried to keep up with her in the corridors and when she asked me, I just quickly replied "Sure." "Great. Your preliminary testing didn't show any eczema but we saw skin sensitivity conditions. If you had been through orientation yesterday, you would know we recommend the test subjects attend with a shaved groin region. Sorry to be so blunt. It is so the physical restraints don't irritate or cause a rash on the subjects and it makes the examinations much easier. If you have no objections, we will provide a depilatory hair removal for the groin. Also, we will provide you with a bag of equipment that you will need for the trial. In the bag you will find the same depilatory that can be used while wearing the restraint, an enema bag, months supply of enema solution and any additional prescriptions or supplements that your doctor has assigned for you. Most likely there will be some vitamins and food supplements, possibly more depending on your test results. There will also be instructions for everything inside the bag." I hated the word 'restraint'. I knew what it meant for fucks sake. And enemas.. Auuu, this trial is going to suck so bad. I really didn't want to do this. I had to get out. I would rather move back home to my parents than do this shit. "Uhmm.. I know it's not what you want to hear at this early point but what would it take if I wanted to.. Uhm.. not attend this trial?" The nurse stopped and looked at me with a surprised gaze. "How do you mean? We haven't even started yet. I understand if you are nervous about a drug trial but don't be concerned, we take good care of our test subjects." "No.. it's not the tr.. well, I just.. I'm getting cold feet, okay. I have never done anything like this and it all seems a bit intrusive. Please, if it's possible, I would like to leave." The nurse seemed a bit perplexed. "You already signed the agreement, yes?" I nodded. The nurse looked crestfallen. "Then it will not be easy, in fact, it is the opposite of easy. It's normal to be nervous but you should have brought up any concerns earlier, before signing. Your marrow sample has been processed and the solution is being made as we speak. And as you have signed the contract, you have accepted certain conditions. We understand the intrusive nature of the trial and that is why we compensate our trial patients with 1000 dollars per month. If you want to leave now, which no one will prevent, you will be required to compensate Omnilust for the costs that have incurred. The marrow analysis and the CRISPR solution cost is 30 000 dollars. I don't know how they would handle your case since you jumped in quite quickly but I would expect them not to be happy..." She kept talking but it all became white noise. 30 000?! I mean I could take the added costs, I was already up to my neck in loan payments but what exactly am I taking extra costs for?! For signing a contract? This was bullshit! I was getting angry. I missed most of her speech but.. "..And please understand that we are handling the trial with every caution in mind. We have a trial psychiatrist and we provide additional services per patient needs. We only want to test a drug and if all goes well, you will end up with a healthy prostate and we all go our separate ways. Please do consider at this point that leaving the trial, even if it hasn't begun yet, will be difficult. You signed the agreement so you are legally bound now." 30 000 bucks.. Would it be worth it? The whole ordeal just doesn't seem like something I could survive. And yes, it might seem superficial but I don't think I could survive not masturbating for 6 months. I gathered all my courage and approached that subject. "It's just.. The restraint, it really freaks me out. I don't.. I don't know if I can cope with it. I can not go 6 months without spilling my seed." The nurse smiles pleasantly and nodded "Yes, it is a conundrum and let me be clear from the start. You will ejaculate during the trial. It would be harmful for a male to go 6 months without ejaculation of sperm, it would raise the risk of prostate cancer greatly if not and we need regular samples. But masturbation and as follows, intercourse will be prevented during this medical trial for the entire duration. Let me rephrase that, penile intercourse will be prevented, patients are allowed other intercourse if they are so inclined." Oh great, now shes referring I go the faggot way, no thank you! I didn't fully understand what she meant by ejaculating since masturbation and intercourse were off the table but I didn't have the courage to make follow up questions, there was only so much embarrassment I could take. So, either go along with it or face payments of 30 000 and lose your home and move back to your parents' home. I sighed heavily and looked at the floor. "Ok. I guess.. I guess I will go along with the trial then." The nurse nodded and patted my shoulder. "I know it seems like a big deal and it will be challenging but we will do all we can to make your trial time as pleasant as possible. And you are helping the world by potentially coming up with a cure for prostate cancer, please don't forget that either." Great, just fucking great. We resumed our walking and behind a corner we saw big double doors with the label 'auditorium'. The nurse gave me a folder labeled 015, wished me good luck and told me to go in and take a seat. CHAPTER 5 --- GETTING FITTED --- There were four people in the auditorium seats, five counting me. No one said a word and there was an anxious atmosphere in the room. I sat down and began to open the folder, better start reading now as I should have done from day 0! I can not believe I had so royally screwed myself with this whole mess. I lost my job to be here and now it seems I'm going to lose the ability to masturbate. Job.. fine, take it. Masturbation.. That's my number one delight, I don't want to lose it! Soon a male doctor walked on to the podium in the front stage, great, so no time to read these papers. He started giving a long winded speech about how we were pioneers and explorers in the medical frontline and congratulated us all for the time and sacrifice. He then fired up a powerpoint presentation about the drug itself. I swear, every other slide was a crosscut of some man's rectal cavity and rectum. Felt like hours later but only 30 minutes had passed, the doctor gave us a thumbs up and wished us good luck in the trial before walking out of the room. Immediately at the back of the auditorium a female voice called out "Patients 009 to room 3 and patient 103 to room 1, please. Bring all your belongings with you." Two men stood up and left the auditorium. I decided to try and be productive, I opened the folder that the nurse had given me earlier. I chose to ignore the signed agreement, no point reading it now, it was already signed. The folder had very little in it. One paper described the trial itself and one sheet was a help guide to living with the restraint on. I chose to read the help guide and it made my stomach turn. There were these home tips on how to improve comfort and how to sleep better with the restraint on. It was very tidy and had little info about the device itself. One section about sleeping difficulty read for example 'Problems sleeping while wearing the restraint can and are most often caused by NPT, which stands for nocturnal penile tumescence. These can be alleviated and will become easier to deal with after several nights of sleeping with the restraint on but at the beginning, it can cause difficulty falling asleep and cause discomfort in the mornings. In some cases the discomfort can be so severe that wearers are woken in the middle of the night. If you experience any of the problems stated above, please keep reading for helpful tips on how to avoid the discomfort...' It went on like that, making it look like wearing the restraint was perfectly normal! I hated it. I kept on flipping the pages and one paper was titled 'Biopsies and prostate exams, preparation needed!'. I felt sick reading it and learning about conducting enemas at home. It seems I was given two choices.. Small enema an hour before the examination for small check ups and large enema for longer examinations. I really fucking hated this, enemas at home?! Christ, what had I gotten myself into. I chose to change pages but before I could read anything, I heard; "Patients 114 to room 2, please. Patient 015 to room 4, please. Bring all your belongings with you." 'Well, here goes, dead man walking. I actually miss working in that fucking burger flipping joint. I miss working double shifts and being miserable. This is going to suck so bad!'. These were some of the thoughts going through my head as I exited the auditorium and walked along the hallway. I wished the walk would last forever but before I knew it, I was in front of door number 4. I knocked, knowing full well I was walking my last steps as a free man. "Come in." I heard a deep voice say. I opened the door and saw a huge man in a white coat, with a stethoscope around his neck, reading a folder. "Patient 015, I assume?" I nodded feeling nervous and anxious. "Please go behind the curtain, remove all your clothes and put on the examination gown so we can begin." I did exactly what was instructed and felt like I was on death row. I knew what was about to happen to me and we all acted like nothing weird was going on! I tried to take my time undressing but it only took a minute or so and I was standing in front of the doctor, wearing a paper examination gown, feeling my face turn red. The doctor typed something on his computer and then turns towards me while grabbing a pair of latex gloves and started to pull them on his hands, one by one. "You seem nervous patient 015." I didn't respond as I felt like there was nothing to say. The doctor continued "Right, a nurse will come in shortly and take you to the washroom where you will receive the depilatory treatment after which I will meet you here, okay?" I nodded and before I could even try to speak, there was a knock on the door and the doctor said "Yes?" The door opens and an attractive young nurse pokes head head in. "I'm here for patient 015 depilatory treatment." The doctor nods and motions for me to follow the nurse. As I make my way out of the room, I can't help but notice how attractive the nurse is. I follow her to a washing room that looks very professional. The nurse also puts latex gloves on her hands. "Alright, please remove the paper gown so we can begin. This procedure will take roughly 15 minutes after which you can take a shower." I feel myself blush but I comply. I pull off my examination gown and stand stark naked in front of the nurse. She takes a spray gun looking device and begins to apply this shaving foam looking gel to my groin area. The gel seems to be expanding. "If you would please, spread the gel all over your mid section, including between the buttocks." I hear the nurse say. With more emotions of humiliation and embarrassment I begin to lather the gel all over my groin and midsection. The nurse seems content as she watches me closely as I spread the gel around. She tells me to go wash my hands and asks me to stand still for 15 minutes, while the gel does its work. As I wait, I try to calm myself down and figure out what to do. It's very difficult to concentrate while I am standing there, naked, with the foam all over my genitals and an attractive nurse close by. I start feeling a thermal reaction from the gel, it's spreading all over my groin. The warmth feels kind of intense and to my utter humiliation, I feel myself grow erect and blush furiously. The nurse smiles and looks away and tries to console me. "That is fine, 015. You are not the first to have an erection during a medical procedure." She gives me the courtesy of looking away. "Please let me know when the situation has passed." She says. I stand there like an idiot, with my cock erect feeling horrified by the situation. I hope and beg in my head for the erection to go away. After 5 minutes, my dick finally gives in and goes flaccid. I mumble with a face as red as a tomato. "Uuh.. uhm.. the situation.. uh, has passed." I squeak out. "Good, 8 more minutes and you can have a shower. If it starts feeling warm or heated, it is to be expected and is nothing out of the ordinary." Time seems to crawl as I stand there with my groin feeling warm and prickly now. After an eternity the nurse declares the time is up. She emotes for me to get in the shower, thank god there is a curtain for some privacy. I step in the shower and hope I could get a chance to finish my failed masturbation session but the nurse stays in the room, no such luck. With a scrubby washcloth, I wash away the foam that was applied to my genitalia. It takes effort to wash off the goo but the warm water helps. As the gel is removed, all my body hair, which was light and sparse, falls off with the gel. My mid region is as smooth and hairless as a baby's bottom. I knew this was going to happen but it does not make the situation any less humiliating. I step out the shower and put on a new examination gown. The nurse states that I am done and asks me to follow her. As I walk behind her back to the doctor's examination room, I notice how my buttocks seem to glide more now without any hair there. The nurse brings me back to the room with the doctor and tells him "015 has been prepped, all yours, doctor." The doctor nods and the nurse leaves, leaving me alone with the large man. He looks up from his folder to address me. "No easy way around this, we are going to have to do procedures which we do not normally do in medical examinations. First things first, I am going to need to examine your genitals so please lift up your gown." My heart skips a beat. This is it, end of the line. No more erections for 6 months to little mister Leery. I feel like having a panic attack and screaming. But instead, I simply do as the doctor orders and lift up the examination gown. The doctor looks at my flaccid cock for a moment and then looks up at me. "I am going to measure you now, please, try not to get excited, we need you to remain flaccid." I feel myself getting very warm as my chest starts rising and falling rapidly. I try to keep focused but the situation is difficult. I look into the ceiling as I feel the doctors latex covered hands prod and pull my flaccid penis every which way. After a while, I see him write something down on a medical pad. He then goes to a cabinet and pulls out a sterilized bag, rips it open and spills the contents on to a medical tray. I see shiny metal pieces resembling a flaccid penis. I feel sweat in my armpits. The doctor arranges the metal parts and brings the tray closer to my groin. "Very good. Here comes the difficult part then." The next few minutes are almost indescribable. I again avert my gaze and look into the ceiling as I feel the doctors hand on my genitals and he begins to work a solid steel ring on my penis, behind the testicles. I keep hoping this is all a bad dream. He does this a few times and informs me that he got the size wrong. The ring feels much tighter on the second time. I still keep telling myself that this isnt happening. My eyes fixed on the ceiling. I pray in my head that this isn't real and this is all a dream. I feel the heavy steel ring at the base of my cock and then I feel the doctor take my penis and feed it into a tube of some kind. The tube feels tight and small. I look down and see my dick has disappeared in the small steel tube. I feel him seal the tube to the steel ring with a locking mechanism of some kind and write something on the medical pad. The doctor moves away from me and removes his gloves. "Okay! You can lower your gown, the embarrassing part is over. You have been given the restraint which you will have to wear for the duration of the medical trial. In a week, if all goes well, we will administer you with your first dose of the CRISR/P1. Please monitor yourself for any discomfort for the next few days. In your folder there are instructions and advice on how to adjust to life with the restraint and there is a number which you can call at any time should there be any problems or concerns." I lower my gown but I still feel indecent. The weight of the steel chastity device or, 'the restraint', is heavy on my groin. My armpits have sweat stains as I sweated through the paper gown. The doctor seems professional while all this is happening but I feel anything but normal or professional right now as I try to adjust to the weight of the chastity device on my penis. The doctor steps forward to shake my hand. "Okay. Thank you for taking part in the trial. You may change back to your clothes now and you are free to leave." I quickly get behind the paper screen and take off the examination gown. I need to get out of this place. I spend a few seconds looking at the horrible device attached on to my penis and feel hopeless and desperate about the situation. I dress in record time, take my paper folder and I leave the building which I now believe to be a portal to hell! I thought the medical examination before was bad, with the enemas and prodding and poking but even though this didn't last nearly as long, this was by far the worst. As I exit the building, I feel myself walking a bit weird, the chastity device still feeling so out of place in my groin. I also notice I am sweating profusely, when I get to the bus stop, I feel that I have broken a sweat. This has got to go. No way can I live like this. This is insane! I keep telling myself and cursing my stupidity in my head. How the hell did I agree to go along with this?! 6 months?! I feel panic rising and I feel sick to my stomach. I hate myself for being so idiotic and stupid. I keep violently calling myself all kinds of bad things as I do realize I have only myself to blame. As I get on the bus and start my way home, I try to rationalize my situation but it all seems so bleak. I have no job, no education and no sex life! I think what the hell I can do is contrive a suicide note and go into one of the many bridges around here. I hug the folder and curse the heavens silently for my bad fortune. But as any person in a desperate situation, I try hard to rationalize. Ok, the good news? I get 1000 bucks a month, that's good. I may help cure prostate cancer, that's good too. I no longer have to work a shitty job flipping burgers. Me and Chris will not get evicted this month. And all I have to do is... I grit my teeth and groan.. is not masturbate and live as a sexless pathetic virgin for 6 months. Ok, so the cost does seem extreme but maybe, just maybe, I can do this? I reach my block of flats and start to walk up the 3 flights of stairs to my home with the folder in my hand. I get through the door and am happy to find that Chris is still in school. I dive into my room, close the door and get naked. Time to get a proper look at this 'restraint' thing. I sit on my bed, spread my legs and take a good long stare at my crotch. You know the saying, a sense of impending doom? That pretty much describes my situation and how I feel. I see my penis is encased in a medical grade titanium chastity device. My first instinct? Escape. Hell or high water, I need to figure out a way of getting my dick out of this thing. I tug on it, it's on there, solid. I tug some more and I curse my teenage hormones as I feel blood rush to my groin! My mighty erection is no match to the relentless titanium and soon I feel pressure, a little pain and nothing close to resembling pleasure, something which my cock used to be a crucial part of. After about 5 minutes I give up, defeated. I need to get my head straightened out and accept my situation. Time passes... I wake up with a startle, it's dark inside my room. I hear Chris knock on my door and my first instinct is to dart over and get my boxers on! No way in hell am I going to let Chris see this device on my crotch! I pull my boxers on and start pulling my sweats on too. Hesitant, I call out to Chris who enters with his bag in hand. "Hey man, I just got off school. So? How was it? Tell me everything." I panic and try to think of an excuse for now, no way am I going to tell Chris the truth of what happened today. I decide to fake fatigue, well not fake as I am really tired, exhausted really but I still play that card. "Hey, Chris. I uuh, I just got home too and I was actually going to go to sleep.." Chris cuts me off. "Sleep? It's three in the afternoon." I struggle to come up with an excuse. "Oh, yeah.. I know that. But the medical trial drugs are really making me tired. I'll tell you more in the evening or tomorrow, ok?" This excuse seems to satisfy him and he leaves me be with a shrug. I am content staying in my room for the rest of the day. Something about getting your manhood placed behind a lock and a key just bums a guy, you know? I spend the rest of the day feeling sad for myself and hopeless about my situation. I decide to go to sleep, not because I want to but just so I can pass the time. CHAPTER 6 I wake up in a startle. I'm hazy from my deep slumber but I know something pinches, hurts in fact. A second later as my brain reaches full awareness, I realize the pain is in my crotch. I sit up and a wave of nausea hits me. I fall back and try to understand what is happening. 'The NTT or NPT or whatever the fuck it was called.. night time erections! That must be it!' I think and I quickly realize it is no joke, I feel like my balls are on fire! I stumble out of bed and rush to the folder, hopping on one leg as it really fucking hurts down there! I find the guide leaflet again and open the page on NPT advice. 'Blaa blaa, medical bullshit yadda yadda, where is the fucking advice!' You curse as the pain seems to be getting worse and your erection seems to refuse to quit and the chastity device is absolutely crushing you poor little dick. Finally! I find the page I need. NPT night/morning help! I start reading and quickly discover some possible solutions. 'Peeing. Apparently peeing helps you go flaccid in the morning as the reason you wake up with a boner happens for two reasons.. yeah yeah, yadda yadda.. so peeing? Got it.' I continue reading. 'Squats or other exercise helps to reallocate blood flow elsewhere.. good to know!' '..cold shower.. yeah, that one is obvious and I even I knew that!' Then suddenly the advice gets weird. '..sleeping with tighter underwear, like speedo or a thong also helps reduce.. sheesh, what?' '..rapid insertion of a finger or thumb into the anal cavity can help alleviate NPT problems whilst living with the restraint.. What the fuck?!' I stop reading the leaflet. Thankfully, the dread I feel from reading the last two pieces of advice actually did the trick. My erection wilted away and the pain is gone completely. I make a note for myself 'Reading boring medical bullshit about fingering yourself seems to help too, should write that in fuckers!" I take a quick inventory of my surroundings. I am still in my shitty room, the clock shows it's 2 in the morning. I curse my sad life and get back in my bed, hoping sleep takes me quickly. I have one of those time jump sleeps. As soon as I closed my eyes it feels like a second passes and I see light coming through my window. I groan and feel a burning pain in my groin again along with a need to take a piss. I look at my phone, it's 5.30 in the morning?! I curse this device that is ruining your sleep cycle and slouch to the bathroom. To further underline my humiliation, I learn that I now need to sit to take a piss. I also learn that relieving my bladder does help with the morning wood pain but it's quite slow to work and it takes a few minutes until my dick gives up trying to get hard. I hate this device so much, so fucking much. I swear, no human being should ever be subject to this! 'I hate to be awake this early in the day, especially since I have nothing planned. I hate the device on my cock so much! If this is the norm now, that I don't need an alarm clock but instead I get to look forward to waking up in pain every day, I think I will rather call it quits and pay Omnilos the 60 000 in damages. My life seems so worthless right now.' I lie in my bed wide awake now. I take my phone and start browsing some meme sites. No more than a few memes go by and I see an image of a sexy woman. I put my phone away quickly! 'Nope, nope, nope nope nope.' I cant fucking see that stuff, not in my condition. I start thinking how badly I want to masturbate, how badly I miss having an erection. It's barely been 20 hours since I got locked in this thing and it seems like an eternity has passed since the last time I was hard. I remember my failed masturbation in the bathroom after signing the contract and I realize just how horny I am feeling right now. My brain seems to know that I have no access to my cock and my brain's reaction is to be a douchebag and make me want to maturbate ten times more. I spent a good 20 minutes getting lost in these thoughts until I catch myself going down a dark path and I snap out of it. I shouldn't be horny, I musnt be horny. If Im horny, I will go crazy! But saying things don't change the facts. I was horny. I have gone from masturbating every day, sometimes multiple times a day to never being able to get a hard for the next six months. And let me tell you, that kind of a thought is soul crushing. I feel panic rising within me and I need to do something, anything to try and help my seemingly doomed situation. I get up from my bed and look out the window, feeling sorry for myself. There is noise coming from the kitchen. I check my phone for the time, it's little past 6 in the morning, Chris must be up and getting ready to go to school. I dont feel like I can face him right now but I realize I left my door wide open and before I can say 'fuck my life' I see Chris peaking into my room. "Hey Simon. What are you doing up so early?' "I uuh.. went to sleep so early last night that I woke up early too, it seems." My voice is weak and silent. Chris looks around and comes in. "You look terrible man, have you been eating or drinking anything?" "I..I dunno man, just tired I guess. "Well, make sure you eat something, you look worn out. I have a few minutes before I gotta head to school, can you tell me how yesterday went?" I feel my face turn red. "It was uuh, good. I am part of the medical trial as a test patient. So we are good for rent as soon as I get my first payment." "So can you tell me what drug you are on, what are they testing on you?" "It's an experimental drug to help or possibly cure prostate cancer." I say quietly. "Prostate cancer? That's odd, you don't exactly belong in the risk group for prostate cancer." "It's something to do with a technology called CRISPR, I don't know." I shrug and kind of hope Chris would leave me alone. "CRISPR? Sheesh, that's pretty cutting edge! I didnt even know they had progressed into human trials. You are part of the future, my man." I shrug again, trying to seem indifferent "Well, I guess." I feel like I shouldn't even ask but on the other hand, Chris is my friend "Uuh, Chris? I do need to warn you that I might not be able to finish this trial.. theres some.. complications." Chris looks concerned "What do you mean? We need the money, it can't be that bad?" "You have no idea.." I blurt out accidentally but I catch myself and shut up, feeling my face heat up. Chris looks at me with a worried gaze. He checks his watch and then steps into my room. "Come one buddy, tell me... what's going on? Why do you want to quit the trial?" I take a deep breath and consider telling him but I can't, it's too embarrassing. I sigh deeply and groan. "It's just... I'm not sure I can do this trial, okay? I can't tell you why but just trust me okay?" Chris is perplexed and a little annoyed at me withholding information from him. He shrugs and gets up to leave "Ok, whatever you say buddy. I gotta go to school. Just.. hang in there until I get back okay? We will talk and go from there, okay?" I groan and wish I could tell him that I might not even survive an hour, let alone many hours until he comes back home. But something compels me to humour him. I nod "Okay.. I can do that." Chris nods and leaves. I am crushed by the thought that usually, when I have the flat all to myself, I masturbate... something I can't do now. I am left to think about my situation alone, which leaves me more depressed. I pick up the folder and start going through it. Maybe there is some advice on how to deal with the emotional side of wearing the restraint. Not sure if I should be surprised or not but there is in fact, a whole chapter dedicated to it. I start reading. An hour later I curse my existence and all the events that have lead me to this moment. The so-called help in the folder went into long drawn out philosophical bullshit. I should try to accept my horny state and how I should incorporate it in my everyday life. How women express sexuality much more freely than men do. I should try and learn to enjoy the prolonged state of arousal and more such bullshit. No advice, just some self help meditate-your-way-out-trouble crap. There was a mention about a service the medical trial provides and it was the worst part. At any time during the day, from Monday to Sunday there is an on-call nurse available at the medical trial center where they provide PIE, which stands for prostate-induced-ejaculation. So my options are meditation, learning to like being horny, frustrated and desperate or then having some fucking nurse stick a finger in my ass! I tossed the folder to the corner of my room and started pacing around feeling angry and incredibly frustrated. Masturbation is a core function in a man! it's not fair to take that away from someone! I feel embarrassed and ashamed about my current predicament but I also have a voice in the back of my head that tells me to hush, that this is for the greater good and I also tried to keep my mind on the money. Bullshit, I say! I kicked my bed, wished the whole world would die in a nuclear cataclysm and went for a run, I couldn't be alone with my thoughts a second longer. And as nice and relaxing I thought a good run would feel, it was not so. 5 minutes in and I feel the heavy chastity device swing and trash around in my boxers like it was a wrecking ball. Another five minutes and it had yanked on my balls so badly that it hurt to walk. So a jog turned into a walk which turned into a pained limping and in 30 minutes I was back home, taking a long albeit cold shower with no happy ending, which was, or rather used to be, the norm for me. I dry off and get changed. No more than 10 minutes I was alone with my thoughts and I went out for a run again, feeling like I would explode if left alone at the flat. This time however, I did wear my smallest pair of boxers wedged up to my ass crack so the chastity device would stay in place. Small victories.. or not. I did manage to run for an hour this time but there was a new problem. While the chastity device was held in place, now the amount of cloth I had stuck between the crack of my ass was causing so much friction my ass was on fire. Again I limped home but this time I walked like I had just shit my pants as my buttocks were raw and sore. Another cold shower and I went to bed and took a nap, hating everyone and everything in this world. I can't say it was a pleasant nap as I woke up feeling like I had been beaten up. I woke to the sound of our flat door closing, Chris had come home. I hear him calling from the kitchen. "Simon, buddy? We gotta talk, man." I stumble up from my bed and make my way out of my room, one eye still closed and I am half asleep and feeling croggy. "Oh hey Chris. How was school?" "Nevermind school! Dude you are in serious shit! I called around and there is only one CRISPR medical trial that is on stage of patient trials. Dude! Are you okay?" The way Chris said it not only told me he probably knows and suddenly I am wide awake. My best friend knows that I have been locked in chastity? My best friend knows that I am half the man I used to be? Am I still a man? I shuffle on my feet and almost retreat back to my room, I cannot bring myself to look him in the eye. "Yeah.. the one thousand a month did seem like it was too good to be true.." Your voice is weak and you feel so ashamed about your situation. Chris is struggling with his words too, which is weird from a medical student. Usually they can happily talk about anything and everything, no matter how weird or gross. "Is it true? I was told the patients in the trial need to be... uuh... wearing... something?" "Mhm" I blurt out feeling my face turn so red it might melt off. I look down to avoid his gaze, I can feel the tears welling up but I try not to cry. Chris throws his bag into his room and walks around the kitchen "Oh fuck... man, I am so so sorry. I had no idea they would do something like this! I mean I know it's a trial and all and they usually do weird stuff but this?! Why on earth did you go along? Why did you agree?!" Chris is practically shouting at me. I had no excuses. I had no good reason or explanation to give him. I thought I couldn't be humiliated further than I already have but nope, here is some more. I speak like a child that has been caught doing something wrong "I.. Well, I had to rush to be involved in the trial, right? And I got in it so fast... I.." My face is melting off, I am sure of it. "I didn't read the material they handed out, I just signed the papers before I knew what they were going to do to me." I fight back the tears, feeling like I'm about to have a mental breakdown. "Fuck, you are so stupid! This has got to be the dumbest thing you have ever done, Simon! There is no excuse for this." Chris is now giving me a stern look with his eyes wide open. I feel like a petulant child and my voice cracks. "I didn't know, ok! I had no idea they would do this to me! And I really don't need your anger, don't you realize that I feel bad enough already! It's my fault we are going to be evicted!" Chris rubs his temple and wipes his hand across his face, seemingly very frustrated with me. He is still angry but he speaks in a calmer voice. "Well have you read the papers now.. do you know just how much we are neck deep in shit? Do you know if you quit, not only do you NOT get paid, you have to pay them a minimum collateral of 30 000 dollars!" I fought back as hard as I could but a single tear rolled down my cheek and I hang my head in shame and utter defeat, Chris knows the situation it seems. I look at my feet and nod "I know. But I still don't think I can do this. It's horrible, Chris." Chris slumps down on the sofa we have in the kitchen/living room. He looks stressed and angry. Neither one of us says anything for a full minute. The silence is soul crushing. Chris leans forward and looks at the floor and flails his arms frustrated. "We have no options, man. You have to do this. You messed up and I can only imagine how much it sucks to have to be locked in that... that thing. But we have no other solutions. You have got to soldier on, no matter the circumstances." I can't believe what I am hearing. I cant believe what he just said. Now I feel a surge of anger in me. "Hold on! You have no idea what I am going through here.. don't think you can just say that and expect things to happen. I've been on the trial barely a day and... just.. I have not decided yet what I am going to do." Chris slaps his hand against his knee. "We gotta decide together. Both our livelihoods hang in the balance, Sammy! You quit, you have to move back to your parents, buuhuu? What happens to me? I become homeless and I get kicked out of school. The deal was, you bring in cash until I graduate and I would pay you back once I get a job!" My face drops. "But..." Chris stands up and shouts. "No buts! No nothing! Scuse the phrasing but you have got to man up, Sammy! You got yourself in this situation and I'm sure it sucks.. hell, I can't even imagine how much it must suck but there are no other options right now! I will help you in any way I can of course but you have got to see the next 6 months through!" I try to shout back "Easy for you to say! You're not the one with his manhood locked up in titanium!.. I!.. " The room falls silent. Neither one of us says a word and we both realize that this was the first time either one of us had so explicitly mentioned the chastity device locked on my poor cock. The silence seems deafening. Chris speaks and this time there is the slightest hint of a smile on his face "Sammy, man.... you have to do this. I mean.." He tries to suppress a chuckle but it gets out. "I mean.." He lets out a laugh "I cant believe you actually let yourself be locked in a fucking chastity device, you fucking dummy!" He is still obviously frustrated and angry but at least the situation got a little lighter with the mention of the 'restraint'. My legs feel weak so I simply sit down on the floor, wipe the tear off my face and hug my knees. I too let out a laugh "Yeah.. it happened and now I gotta live with it.. literally!" I chuckle briefly before looking down at my feet again "But yeah... I know I messed up. I just have to.. I don't know, I have to see how this goes and if I can even do this." Chris seems to perk up after hearing me. "Well, that sounds better.. see how this goes. Yeah.. take it one day at a time. Don't quit today at least, okay? This has been such a shit day I don't want to have to think about eviction right now. Promise me you wont do something stupid like quit the trial, at least not today?" I groan and bite my lip. Chris has no idea how difficult this is and how humiliating. Just the idea of having to live with this device on my body seems so fucking foreign and bizarre. But I can't really argue his logic and maybe a day won't hurt? I sigh feeling utterly and completely defeated. "Fine. I won't quit the trial today, I can promise that," I say. Chris hands me a paper bag, which I take a look in. It appears to be a sandwich from Subway, which I could definitely go for right now. Chris stands and goes to his room and I hear him say "Thanks man. I appreciate it. And I will help you in any way I can. If you want to talk, let me know and I will be there for you." I drag myself to my room, close the door and pretend that none of this is real, it's just a bad dream.