Good Medicine Freshman YearChapter 22 Fallout
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December 21, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio
“Mikey!” Liz squealed when I walked into the house on Monday evening.
“Hi, Lizzy!” I said.
She ran to me and we hugged lightly, then went into the living room where she had been sitting with my parents.
“Welcome home, Mike,” Dad said. “How is Jocelyn?”
“Pretty good. She has most of her range of motion back and they’re working to see if they can get her some more. Her bones have knit well, and she’s able to move around more freely.”
“That’s good to hear. How are things with Dale?”
“He’s having a very good time in Madison,” I said with a grin.
“Dinner is in the oven and will be ready in about ten minutes if you want to go unpack,” Mom said.
I got up and took my bags to my room and unpacked. I was happy to be able to come home, but I was going to miss sleeping in the same bed with someone I cared for. The past week at Nancy’s had been very nice, and so had the few days at Jocelyn’s. I liked the idea of having someone to snuggle close to each night. Driving to Nancy’s house each night after midnight, and driving back in time to run and pray, just didn’t make sense, and I couldn’t safely have Nancy stay the night in the dorms, not to mention she had to be home in the morning to get to school. I wondered, mostly in jest, if I shouldn’t take Jeannette and Marie up on their offers.
Mom called me to dinner just as I put the last of my clothes away. We had a nice family dinner, then after Liz and I cleaned up the kitchen, we played Scrabble as a family, then popped some popcorn and watched MASH. When the show ended, Mom made hot chocolate.
“Emmy stopped by Jocelyn’s house yesterday,” I said.
“How is she?” Liz asked.
“Bummed about not being able to see either of us. But I did point out you guys could see each other at school.”
“Her dad is a real prick,” Liz spat.
“Elizabeth,” Dad warned gently.
“YOU told me that, Dad!” she protested.
“So I did,” Dad said with an ironic smile. “Let’s not use that word, OK?”
“But it’s true! He a racist moth ... uh, idiot.”
“Yes. And there is very little any of us can do about that at this point. For now, just see Emmy at school and hope that Lenny relaxes a bit about it.”
“You know there isn’t much chance of that,” I said.
“His wife might be able to get him to calm down a bit,” Mom said. “Just give it a bit of time.”
“For Liz’s sake, I hope so,” I said.
“Did you hear from April again?” Mom asked.
“No. I don’t expect to. Unless she shows up at Holy Transfiguration asking to be chrismated, I don’t think it’s worthwhile. And even if she did, I don’t think she’s the girl for me.”
Liz smirked, “She was the only girl who would go out with you!”
“Liz,” Mom warned gently.
“She’s right, Mom,” I said. “How many girls did I ask out before April who didn’t even make it to the second date?! Cassie made it for about a month, and that was the longest before April.”
“Things seem to be different now.”
I nodded, “A bit. I suppose I’ve changed.”
“You have. Just enough to be more interesting to the opposite sex, but not enough to lose sight of who you are.”
“Speaking of the ‘opposite sex’,” I said, “I’m going out with Tasha after Vespers on Wednesday.”
“When are you going back, Mikey?”
“Sunday afternoon. I have to work Monday morning.”
“I’m glad you’re home.”
“Me, too.”
December 23, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio
“Where are you two going?” Deacon Vasily asked.
“The usual place,” I said. “Marie’s. And then to Yellen’s, if that’s OK.”
“It’s a bit cold for ice cream, don’t you think?”
“They have really good hot cocoa, but it’s never too cold for ice cream!”
“OK. Please bring Tasha home straight from Yellen’s.”
“I will,” I said.
Tasha and I left the church and I drove to Marie’s. We were quickly seated in a booth, but instead of sitting across from me, Tasha sat next to me and scooted close so that our shoulders and legs touched. I smelled her perfume or body spray, and it was intoxicating.
“I don’t think this is what your dad had in mind,” I grinned.
“He’s not here, is he?”
“No.”
“And you aren’t complaining, are you?”
“No!” I grinned. “I have a very good sense of self-preservation!”
The waitress came to take our drink orders, and we ordered our food right away as well. We were still in the Nativity fast, so we each ended up ordering a salad.
“You can put your arm around me, Mishka!” Tasha said.
I shifted a bit and put my right arm around Tasha’s shoulder and she slipped her arm behind me and around my waist.
“I hope your dad doesn’t have a spy in the diner!” I chuckled.
“We are not doing anything at all improper!”
“I’m not so sure he’d see it that way!”
“Then kiss me, and he can have something to complain about!” she teased.
I turned my head and our lips met in a soft kiss which quickly turned into a steamy French kiss. We were interrupted by the waitress bringing our drinks, and we broke the kiss. The waitress, who had worked at the diner for as long as I could remember, set our drinks on the table, then winked and smiled, and left us alone. Tasha clearly wanted another kiss, so we kissed a second time.
“Very nice,” I sighed, when we broke the second kiss.
“I enjoy kissing you, Mishka,” Tasha said softly. “Very much!”
And if she were ANY other girl, I’d do my best to take her someplace where we could kiss a lot, and do a lot more. But not Tasha Antonova. It had nothing to do with lack of desire, and everything to do with respecting her wishes. She’d once told me it was, in effect, my job to keep us on the correct side of the line, and I was determined to do it, even if she seemed to want to edge across it. Or leap across it. Or simply forget it existed.
“And I, you,” I said.
We sat quietly with our arms around each other and waited for our food to be brought to the table. Once it was, we moved our arms and scooted slightly apart so I could use my right hand to eat. As I ate, I wondered if I was up to the challenge of keeping things proper with Tasha or not. And if I wasn’t, THEN what?
If I thought being with April that way was a commitment, being with Tasha that way was as good as being married. And I was NOT ready for that, and neither was she, despite protestations to the contrary. Getting married so we could have sex was probably the worst possible reason I could think of. Fortunately, her parents had the same fears, and put strict limits on where we could be together and what we could do together.
When we finished eating, I put a tip on the table, then we went to the register to pay the bill. After I paid, we bundled up and walked out into the frosty air and got into my Mustang.
“Dad said we had to come straight home from Yellen’s, but he didn’t say we had to go straight there!” she said as I started the car.
“That’s asking for serious trouble, and you know it,” I said. “You know we’re only allowed to do what we asked about.”
“Did you ask about kissing me?”
“No.”
“But you did anyway!”
“I believe that’s different. Tasha, I don’t want to get into trouble with your dad. What if he says we can’t see each other?”
“I wish I was eighteen,” she sighed as I pulled out of the parking lot.
“We’d still have the problem of being able to support ourselves.”
“Life isn’t fair,” she sighed.
We rode the rest of the way in silence, and at Yellen’s each got a turtle sundae. When we finished our dessert, I took Tasha home. I walked her to the door and we exchanged a soft kiss before she went inside.
December 25, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio
Christmas began as it always did, with Matins and the Divine Liturgy for the Nativity. We’d been to Vespers the night before and this would complete the cycle of services for the Nativity fast. Once we left church, we’d have no more fasting until the feast of Theophany, which was celebrated the same day as my non-Orthodox friends celebrated Epiphany. I made sure to take the small gift I’d purchased for Tasha with me so I could give it to her at the end of the service.
I was happy that Liz was going to church with us, despite the fact that she didn’t usually go. Dad had asked her, nicely, if she’d please join us so we could be together as a family, and she’d agreed. I didn’t expect her to receive the Eucharist, but just being in church was a big step. Perhaps she could find some peace there, as I always had. The services were beautiful, as they always were, and I was comforted by the familiarity of the hymns and prayers which I had prayed from the time I was little. The Orthodox calendar provided a nice touchstone in my life, the endless cycle of services providing a framework for every other important event in my life.
When the Divine Liturgy ended, I walked over to Tasha and handed her a small box and after ensuring it was OK to open it, she tore off the paper and opened the box to find a necklace with a stylized ‘T’ and a diamond chip in the center.
“Mishka!” she gushed. “It’s beautiful! Thank you!”
“You’re welcome,” I said.
She grabbed my hand and led me out of the nave into the narthex where she gave me a chaste kiss. Kissing inside the nave would offend quite a few people. I helped her put on the necklace and she gave me another quick kiss. She asked me to wait, and went to the cloak room and returned with a gift which was obviously a record album. I tore off the paper to reveal a double-record set of Handel’s Messiah, something I didn’t have in my small classical music collection.
“Thank you!” I said, then kissed her softly.
“Have a blessed Nativity, Mishka. When will you be home again?”
“I’m not sure. Probably during Spring Break, which is the week before Western Easter. But I might work that week because all the other students who work usually take it off. I will come home some weekends to see you, I promise. And I’ll call you.”
“I miss you when you’re away.”
“I miss you too, Tasha. I promise I’ll call you and come see you.”
“Thanks!”
She kissed me once more and then we both went to join our families to head home for our family Christmas celebrations. Ours was always focused on family, rather than on gift giving. We were hosting this year, which meant that once we exchanged our gifts, we’d be busy preparing for having both sets of grandparents, my mom’s brother and his family, and my dad’s brother, and his family, at the house.
Our gifts were always simple - I’d bought the new ABBA album, The Visitors, for Liz and she bought me a new shirt. Gifts from our parents were almost always clothes, and our gifts to them were similar, though once or twice I’d bought them a small item for the house. If we got any ‘loot’ as such, it came from our grandparents, but even that wasn’t over the top.
Once we’d opened our presents, everyone pitched in to begin preparing the house and the food for our guests who would arrive later in the day. I did take a short time out to drive over to Jocelyn’s house so she, Dale, and I could exchange gifts which we’d done since second grade. Our gifts were always simple and inexpensive, hearkening back to when we were all so much younger. I couldn’t stay long, and once we’d done our exchange, I shook hands with Dale, hugged Jocelyn, and headed home for the meal with my extended family.
December 27, 1981, McKinley, Ohio
“How was your Christmas?” Nancy asked when I arrived at her house on Sunday evening.
“Good, especially being able to celebrate at home and see my sister. How was yours?”
“Pretty good. We went to visit my aunt and uncle in Wheeling, West Virginia. Are you interested in going to see Ghost Story tonight after dinner? We could take Mom with us.”
“Sure. What are we doing for dinner?”
“Mom is making pizza. Don’t let our last name fool you! She’s really good with Italian food. This won’t be Pizza Hut!”
Nancy and I set the table and made a salad to go with the pizza. I’d never had a pizza quite like the one that Mrs. Landers served - freshly made crust, with diced tomatoes, fresh basil, thickly sliced pepperoni, and a modest amount of cheese.
“This is awesome!” I said, taking my third bite of the crispy crust and toppings.
“Told ya’!” Nancy laughed.
“Thank Luisa Carboni! She’s been my best friend since we were twelve when she was Luisa Segreti.”
“Well, tell her thanks! Have you taught Nancy how to make this?”
“I’ve taught her how to cook most everything!”
“Cool!” I grinned.
When we finished eating, we all pitched in to clean up, then headed to the theater to see Ghost Story. I found the movie entertaining, and the acting superb, but, in the end, I didn’t particularly like it. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but it was probably related to a big build up leading to what I felt was a very anti-climactic ending. I also wasn’t big on movies about the supernatural, preferring science fiction, though at times those two genres mixed nicely.
When the movie finished, we headed home and had some hot chocolate before Nancy and I went to bed. I was a bit surprised when she left her panties on and climbed into bed with me. She snuggled close and I put my arm around her.
“My period started yesterday,” she sighed.
Which explained why she was wearing panties.
“I enjoy sleeping in the same bed with you whether we have sex or not.”
“I could give you one of my fantastic blowjobs!” she said saucily.
“You could, but I’m content just to cuddle you.”
“You’re sure?”
“I’m sure.”
She turned and rolled a bit so she could switch off the lamp on the bedside table, then we cuddled again, falling asleep in each other’s arms.
December 31, 1981, McKinley, Ohio
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” I asked Nancy, probably for the fifth time.
We were on our way to her friend Beverly’s house for a New Year’s Eve party.
“There won’t be any drugs or any booze, and you’re with me.”
“I know, but going to a New Year’s Eve party with a bunch of kids who are still in High School, including ‘Miss Delicious’ who’s only fifteen, concerns me.”
“It’ll be fine, Mike! We’ll listen to music, dance, and have a good time. At midnight we’ll drink carbonated grape juice. And Beverly’s parents will be there the whole time. What’s really bugging you, Mike?”
“I’m not sure. Six months ago, it wasn’t a big deal to hang around with kids who were fifteen and sixteen, now it just seems a bit strange. Maybe it’s just being in college and having a different perspective than kids who are Freshmen, Sophomores, or Juniors.”
“Didn’t you date a Sophomore? And isn’t your friend Emmy a Sophomore? And your friend Tasha?”
“Yes,” I said. “But I knew them before I started college. I guess that’s the big dividing line. Life suddenly became much more serious. Add in the situation with Liz, and I just feel like I’m in a completely different world than I was in May. A whole lot has happened since then, including basically living with you for a few weeks. Does that make sense?”
“I think what you’re trying to say is that you’ve grown up in these last six months. Or are you trying to say something about me?”
“No way! This isn’t about you. I didn’t mean to imply that, and if I did, I’m sorry. It’s about me and my reaction to being around younger kids, that’s all. You’re eighteen, a Senior, and you had to grow up a few years ago, long before I did.”
“I suppose we do live in something of a different world, don’t we?”
“Yes, we do. I don’t think there’s a real problem, just one in my mind, that’s all.”
“You’re changing,” she said evenly.
“I think that’s pretty normal when you leave home for college, even though I only moved about 35 miles. And it’ll happen again when I get into the REAL ‘real world’ and start working in a hospital. The way you said that seems like it might bother you a bit.”
“It’s the unknown, I guess. I do like the fact you can joke and tease more, but if you won’t be the same person, then what?”
“Isn’t that always going to be a problem?” I asked. “Nobody stays the same forever. Everyone changes.”
“So what happens if one day you change and decide you don’t want to be with me?” she asked softly.
“I think normally I’d say that’s what making an ‘until death do us part’ pledge is all about, but your experience in that area calls out just how hollow that claim would be, at least in your mind.”
October 17, 1981, McKinley, Ohio There was a knock at the door just before 6:00pm and I was sure it was the girls so I called out for them to come in. As expected, it was Jeannette and Marie. “Ready for hot meat between buns and slurping creamy white liquid?” Jeannette teased. “My bedroom is right there!” I grinned. “Should we leave you two the room?” Marie smirked. “Dinner first, then dessert!” Jeannette laughed. I took Angie’s hand and the four of us left the dorm and headed for the...
June 8, 1981, West Monroe and Rutherford, Ohio “This entire conversation is going to be ‘too much information’, isn’t it?” I said when Liz and I left the house on Monday evening. “Probably. Is there anything you don’t want to hear?” “Anything at all about my little sister’s sex life!” I laughed. “But I guess you want to talk.” “‘Cause you won’t judge me, Mikey. You’ll listen and give me good advice.” I pulled out of the driveway and headed towards Rutherford. The Rutherford Free Clinic...
September 14, 1981, McKinley, Ohio On Monday, after lunch, I did as Doctor Orosco had insisted, and met with a counselor from Student Health Services, who, amazingly, was available immediately. The problem was, as I’d argued, that I wasn’t going to repeat what I said, even to another counselor, under any circumstances. I spent ten minutes going around in circles with Doctor Ralph Hart, and made no progress. “I’m not sure what you’re doing here, if you won’t talk to me about what...
October 6, 1981, McKinley, Ohio I met Pete and Jason for breakfast in the dining hall. As usual, Clark was just getting out of bed when I left our room. “You got in pretty late last night, I guess,” Pete said. “We didn’t break up the study group until about 11:30pm.” “I had a long talk with Jocelyn.” “How’s she doing?” “Better, but she has a long way to go, physically, emotionally, and mentally. But at least she’s talking to me.” “I heard you’re invited to the Wednesday biology...
October 4, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “Let me guess, you’re sleeping on the couch again?” Mrs. Landers laughed. “Actually, I just came to talk to Nancy for a bit, then I have homework. I didn’t spend any time on it yesterday.” “Come on in. She’s in her room.” “Thanks.” I walked back through the house to Nancy’s room. She got up to greet me and we exchanged a hug and kiss. “Sorry for putting you off at work,” I said. “But I didn’t want to be interrupted.” “It’s OK. How is Jocelyn?” “I found...
October 9, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “You’re really going to cut back your hours to just the six-hour Saturday shift?” Nancy asked. “That’s what I told Mr. Sokolov yesterday, yes. And he can reduce the hours whenever he finds someone to take them.” “What happened?” “The Biology Department secured a grant for $1500 per semester for me. I explained my situation to Doctor Stanton, my advisor, and he talked to Doctor Norris. I’m starting in the honors program next semester, and there is a small...
September 6, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Mike!” Emmy squealed, launching herself into my arms when she opened the door. “Missed me?” I asked as I carefully spun around with her. “Yes! Let’s go! I’m STARVED!” I put her down and we walked to my car for the drive to Marie’s Diner. “How was your first week of school?” I asked. “Nothing changes. I mean, sure, I’m a Sophomore now, but otherwise it’s all the same. How about you?” “It’s a huge change, especially the amount of homework. I used to...
August 29, 1981, Columbus, Ohio “What are you talking about?” I asked. “Despite spending two days screwing like bunny rabbits,” Jocelyn said with a smile, “I think you’re STILL afraid of sex. May I ask another question?” “I guess,” I sighed. “Why haven’t you and Emmy done it? Because of her? Or because of you?” I could give her the answer that immediately popped into my mind - that Emmy wasn’t sixteen and was under the age of consent. But I knew there was some truth to what Jocelyn said....
December 3, 1981, Rutherford, Ohio “Well that went south pretty quickly,” I said. “They’re playing hardball with you,” Mr. Winston said. “It was always a possibility, but I didn’t think they’d go that route; they didn’t with your dad or sister.” “But they did with my mom?” “Yes, for the same basic reason. I believe they are under heavy pressure from someone to charge you with something; anything. And unless I miss my guess, it’s likely Mrs. Laramy from Family Services. She is certain...
March 15, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “Is it OK if I interrupt?” Clarissa asked on Monday evening. “Sure,” I replied. “What’s up?” “I wanted to check on class schedules for the Fall. I’d like to take the same classes. It’ll help with our study group.” “Sure. Pete, Kurtis, Jason, excuse me for a bit.” Clarissa and I went to my room and sat down with the course catalog. “We need O-Chem, the second semester of cellular biology with lab, a humanities course, and a language course,” I said. “Do...
February 15, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “Mike!” Angie squealed when she opened the door to her room. “Hi, Ang!” She hugged me and kissed my cheek. “I missed you! How was home?” “Good,” I replied. “Have some time for me?” “Always! Your place?” “Sure.” She took my hand and we walked back to my room where I put on Shadows by Gordon Lightfoot, then grabbed a couple of Cokes from the fridge. “How was your weekend?” I asked. “Quiet. Yours?” “I spent some time talking to my dad. I haven’t...
March 27, 1982, McKinley, Ohio I was still thinking about Katy as I walked to the Quick Mart for my weekly shift on Saturday morning. There was no doubt in my mind that sooner, rather than later, Katy was going to ask me to ‘go all the way’ and I’d have a very big decision to make. When I’d mentioned going steady, she’d immediately thought about having sex. The linkage was just as clear as Tasha’s linkage between marital crowns and sex. If I decided to ‘go all the way’ with Katy, it would...
August 24, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Whoa!” I gasped. “It fits, Mike. And it explains everything that happened afterwards.” “Mom, Abby exhibits the same behavior. She basically offered to have sex with me when she said hello the first day, and Becky implied Abby has been doing that since she was twelve.” “Stay out of that Mike. That’s an issue for the van Dorns.” “Is it? Emmy told me that Abby was here earlier and that Liz and Abby were acting crazy so she left and went home.” “You think...
November 27, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio On Friday morning, just after 10:00am, I was surprised when April showed up at the door of Jocelyn’s house. “Your mom said you were here. I guess you and Jocelyn decided to go steady?” I shook my head, “No. There are some problems at home that mean I need to stay here.” “Problems with your parents?” “It’s a family thing I can’t really talk about. What’s up?” “I wanted to apologize for getting upset and sending you away on Monday.” “Apology accepted....
February 14, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio “How are things going, Mike?” Dad asked when I sat down on the stool in the corner of his workshop. “Good, now that all that stuff with Family Services is done. How have things been at home?” “Your mom and sister put on brave faces, but Liz is struggling.” “They both said her schoolwork was good and she seemed OK when I talked to her.” “She has good days and bad days. Doctor Newton says she’s struggling with her feelings for Paul.” “Paul?...
August 26, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “Michael Peter Loucks,” I said. “Hi, Michael! Welcome to William Howard Taft!” the young woman sitting at the table marked ‘Dorm Check-In: H-M’ said. “Thanks.” She flipped through some envelopes in boxes and pulled one out. “The envelope contains your room key, student ID, dining hall card, parking sticker, a campus map, a set of dorm and campus rules, and a schedule of activities for the next five days. There are carts available on the first floor of your...
October 3, 1981, Rutherford, Ohio “Hi, Mike.” “Hi, Mr. Mills. I was just going in to see Jocelyn.” “One of the staff psychologists would like to talk to you first.” “Me? Why?” “To talk to you about Jocelyn. I can’t force you to do it, Mike, but I think it would be a very good idea.” “When? I want to see Jocelyn today.” “If you go back down to the ground floor, there’s an outpatient clinic. Just go to the desk and ask for Doctor Henderson. She’s expecting you.” I turned and went to the...
May 24, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio I was up early on Sunday morning to head to Holy Transfiguration. As Head Acolyte, I was responsible for being at the church about ninety minutes before Matins so that I could refill and light all the oil lamps, replace the tapers in the candle box, sift the sand in front of the icon of the Theotokos to remove the candle stubs, and ensure that the nave was in proper order. When I arrived, I unlocked all the doors, adjusted the thermostat to cool the nave,...
October 12, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “Well THAT stinks,” Nancy said on Tuesday afternoon. “What happens now?” “I don’t know yet. I talked to Doctor Norris this morning after my chem mid-term and he’s confident nothing will happen. The problem is, I’m sure I’ve made an enemy of the Dean, and any minor slip-up on my part is going to become a Federal case.” “But why you?” “I had the misfortune to draw someone who felt she could use the discrimination procedure to get something she couldn’t...
August 16, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio Liz threw her arms around me on Sunday morning when I walked out of my room. “Thank you! Thank you!” I hugged her tightly to me. “Mom let you out of ‘house arrest’?” “Yes. And I know you’re responsible. If you weren’t my brother, I’d kiss you!” “Just remember, you have to behave, because if you don’t...” “I know,” she sighed. “I’m on parole. Did Mom tell you that Paul agreed to plead guilty to one count of statutory rape and one count of oral sodomy...
September 28, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “Mike?” Nancy whispered. “Wake up! I need to eat breakfast so I can catch the bus!” “I’m awake,” I replied. I stretched and yawned and sat up. “Are you doing OK?” Nancy asked. “Much better after last night. That was just what I needed. Thanks.” “I think I’m calling Ripley’s,” Mrs. Landers laughed, coming into the room. “Teenage boy shows up and asks to spend the night with teenage girl. She agrees and gets permission from her mom. Boy desires only...
September 7, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio When I stopped home just before 8:00pm on my way back to McKinley, I found my dad alone, in the living room, sitting in his easy chair, drinking Scotch on the rocks. “Hi, Dad. Where’s Mom?” “Sleeping. She’s completely worn out by last night and today. I’m surprised you’re not.” “I’ll crash when I get back to my dorm. How did it go?” He held up his glass, “Third one. How do you think?” I slumped down onto the couch. “Not good,” I sighed. He took a...
March 23, 1982, McKinley, Ohio I had been extremely distracted during my drive from Circleville to McKinley, and was having real trouble concentrating on my review for O-Chem, and the guys noticed. “What’s bugging you?” Jason asked. “You seem like you’re on another planet.” “I know,” I agreed. “I’m having real trouble concentrating.” “That must have been a hell of a concert!” Pete laughed. “Of course, seeing my girlfriend wrap her lips around a saxophone might distract me, too!” “You’re...
April 30, 1982, Circleville, Ohio “Mom and Dad are out tonight,” Katy said. “Let’s cook together!” “Sure. What did you have in mind?” “Well, now that you have no restrictions because we don’t fast during the Paschal period, I was thinking two small filets, small lobster tails, and broccoli. Surf and turf, I guess.” “That sounds awesome!” I said, then smirked, “What about dessert?” Katy laughed softly, “I have some ideas!” “I bet!” I chuckled. “But we need to make sure we’re on the same...
November 8, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “Do you want me to disappear?” Angie asked as we walked into the dorm after church. “Why? Emmy knows I’m dating you. She’s not jealous. You know she’s coming to visit and she knows you know. It would be REALLY dumb to invite her here otherwise, don’t you think?” “Guys have been known to do dumb things from time to time!” “Not ones who want you to stick around.” “You do remember I told you my High School boyfriend screwed a close friend of mine behind my...
Great and Holy Friday, April 16, 1982, McKinley, Ohio As Angie and I stood quietly waiting for the Lamentations service to begin late on Friday, I thought about the series of services which had brought us here - Bridegroom Matins on Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday evenings; Holy Unction on Wednesday evening; a Vesperal Divine Liturgy on Thursday morning celebrating the Last Supper, the Twelve Gospels service Thursday evening, celebrating the passion; the Royal Hours kept all day Friday; and...
November 2, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “I did not come here for a lecture,” I said firmly. “I did what I felt was in Liz’s best interest. Again. Dad said we needed to talk, and I’m willing to talk. I am NOT willing to listen to a lecture.” “You do not decide what is best for your sister,” Mom said. “That is for your father and me, as well as the professionals.” “And what is Dad’s opinion on this?” I asked. “That is not the point, Mike!” I sighed. We’d been going around in circles on the...
March 5, 1982, Circleville, Ohio “What became of that police investigation?” Mrs. Malenkov asked when I arrived at Katy’s house on Friday evening. “Nothing so far. They haven’t caught the rapist. The school added some security and started a service to walk girls to and from class or work after dark.” “Why did they check on you, specifically?” “The suspect has brown hair and is about 5’10” and I came into the dorm maybe an hour after it happened. At first they had reports it was a black...
November 23, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio On Monday morning, just after breakfast there was a knock at the door. I got up from the couch and went to open it. “Phil?” “Hi, Mike. Can we come in?” “We?” “This is Mrs. Laramy from Family Services.” “Hang on a second.” I went to the kitchen to get my dad, who followed me back to the foyer. “Hi, Phil,” Dad said. “What’s up?” “This is Mrs. Laramy from Family Services.” “Mr. Loucks? I have an order here to take custody of Elizabeth.” “What?!...
May 23, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Good morning, Mike!” my mom said when I arrived at the kitchen table for breakfast. “Hi, Mom,” I said. “What do you have planned for today?” “It’s all on the calendar, just like it has been since I could write,” I replied with a smile. “I work from 8:00am to noon, then I have my Saturday karate class at 1:00pm. Dale and I are playing chess after that, and Vespers are at 6:00pm. I’m taking April to the movies after church.” “What are you going to...
May 31, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio On Sunday morning as I dressed for church, I faced the true reality of what happened the previous night. My make-out sessions with April had, except on that single instance where I’d fondled her sweater-clad breast for more than a second or two, not gone far enough to be included in my confession. What had happened the previous night certainly had. I now faced effectively the same dilemma I would have faced had April and I gone to the motel after Prom. I...
August 21, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio On Friday morning, Mr. Mills called just after 6:00am to let me know that Jocelyn had gone into surgery, and that it would likely be mid-afternoon before he had any news. I thanked him and sat down at the table in the kitchen with a mug of tea I made and read the Rutherford Tribune. Nobody else was up, and I enjoyed the quiet for about an hour before my parents came into the kitchen. “Was that Jocelyn’s dad who called at 6:00am?” my dad asked. “Yes. I...
February 13, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “I visited Ohio State yesterday,” Nancy said when we had a chance to chat on Saturday morning. “And?” “I’m pretty sure I’m going to Taft like we talked about because I can live at home. But the tour was cool and our tour guides were absolutely hysterical.” “Oh?” “Yeah. A guy and his fiancée. He’s a criminal justice major and wants to be a US Marshal. She’s in pre-law and wants to be a criminal defense lawyer. They told some of the funniest stories about...
April 4, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio “Mishka!” Tasha squealed, hugging me tightly, but quickly releasing me because we were in the narthex of the church. “Hi, Tasha!” I said with a smile. She grabbed my hand and led me to the church hall where we got some food and coffee, then sat down by her parents. “Michael, how is school going?” Deacon Vasily asked. “All A’s so far, and I should finish the semester with a 4.0 average.” “Very good. And you’re attending church regularly?” “Yes. Every...
June 6, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio After Vespers on Saturday, I spent a few minutes talking to Tasha. “My dad isn’t sure karate is ‘ladylike’,” she said. “The uniforms cover more than those nice dresses you wear during the Summer!” “You noticed, Mike?” she asked with a soft laugh. “If I may be «некультурный», yes, of course! It’s difficult to miss a pretty girl with a nice body!” “Thank you! But do NOT say that around my dad! He’ll never let you see me again!” “So the answer is ‘no’?” “I...
September 26, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “What?!” I gasped. “How is she?” “I don’t know, and that’s the God’s honest truth. Her dad called from Rutherford Hospital and asked me to call you. All he said was that they were working on her.” “I’m leaving in about three minutes. That’s what I’ll need to get dressed.” “What about Becky?” “I’ll bring her, I guess. I can’t imagine her parents are going to be in Rutherford.” “She’s there with you?” “Yes. Beat me up about that later! I’m on my way to...
October 10, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio I froze and realized my first inclination to go back to McKinley had been the right one. I’d thought my talk with Becky the previous weekend had resolved the issue, but I was very clearly mistaken. I could actually go back. It was early enough, and I hadn’t told Tasha I was going to be home, so she wouldn’t be upset, and a phone call would make her very happy as the two I’d made so far had done. But there was one problem - all I could hear in my head was...
October 11, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio On Sunday morning, Becky and I got out of bed and snuck across the hall to the bathroom, where we got into the shower together. “Thank you,” she said as I lathered shampoo in her hair. “I was afraid you’d say ‘no’ and I’d have missed that.” “You’re OK?” I asked. “Mike, it’s what I wanted from the day I met you. I just knew you’d be perfect. You let me do exactly what I wanted and how I wanted. As I said, patient and gentle.” “You weren’t very gentle...
November 9, 1981, McKinley, Ohio “OK?” I asked, shocked enough that I was rocked back in my seat. “Yes. OK.” “OK to WHAT?” I asked warily. “Getting married.” “You can’t be serious! You’re afraid of French kissing and you want to get married?” Angie smirked, “Gotcha! You should see the look on your face!” “Nice.” I laughed. “You did get me!” “Sorry, I figured at that point I needed to do something to change the mood.” “By making my heart stop?!” “Oh, come on! The first thought that...
January 4, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “And so another semester begins,” I said when I met Angie at the elevators on Monday morning. “I saw your class schedule was basically the same.” “The only real change is I have the creative writing core requirement replacing the scientific writing class. I am so glad I chose to take those in the order I did - it made all the difference in the world for doing the lab reports.” “I’m not complaining! I ended up with an A in biology which I NEVER would have...
January 12, 1982, McKinley, Ohio Influenza was making the rounds of the dorm, and just about everyone had it by Tuesday morning, including me. I dragged myself out of bed, realized there was no way I was going to run, and climbed back into bed. I took some decongestant tablets from the box on the shelf next to my bed and swallowed them with a gulp of water. I hoped to fight the worst symptoms and be able to make it to lab. Angie had already said she wasn’t going to run, so I stayed in bed...
January 25, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “I have a message for Michael Loucks,” a young man announced just as biology class ended. “That’s me,” I said. “Dean Parker would like to see you immediately.” “I’ll go with you, Mike,” Doctor Stanton said. I had no clue what she could possibly want, but I appreciated Doctor Stanton coming with me. We made our way to the administration building. “I’m here to see Dean Parker,” I said. “I’m Mike Loucks.” “One moment,” the young woman at the desk...
January 31, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “You’re STILL struggling with that issue?” Jocelyn asked during our regular Sunday afternoon call. “Does it really surprise you?” “No, I suppose it doesn’t. I think the circumstances of the last year really caused you some serious heartache and anguish, and I’m not just talking about you and me. If you think about it, you and Emmy were ripped apart by her dad; you and Nancy were ripped apart by her difficulty with commitment; you and I were ripped apart by...
September 19, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Why are you sending me such mixed signals?” “Mixed signals?” Jocelyn and I were sitting on the couch, and she was cuddled next to me, at least as best she could, given her obvious discomfort from the injuries, catheter, and physical therapy. I had thought a lot after my talks with Doctor Hart, as well as my talks with Nancy. One thing I was seriously concerned about was getting more deeply involved with Nancy and messing things up with Jocelyn. I...
October 30, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Hi,” Jocelyn said when her dad led me into the living room. “Hi! I’m glad to see you at home.” “And we’re glad to have her home,” Mr. Mills said. “If you need anything, let us know.” I went over to sit next to Jocelyn on the couch. She scooted close and I put my arm around her. She sighed, kissed my cheek, and then snuggled. “I was glad to hear from Doctor Henderson that you could leave the hospital.” “And you should be seeing your sister!” “I will....
March 1, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “I have a meeting with the Dean to get permission to put up the flyers this afternoon,” Kurtis said at lunch. “We’ll only be escorting girls from our dorm. I talked to a couple of guys in other dorms who will organize theirs. I figured we couldn’t take care of everyone without some help.” “Cool,” Clark said. “Did anyone hear any more about the investigation?” “The Times said the police didn’t have any suspects, but were following leads,” Jeannette said. “What...
August 7, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio The Summer was rapidly disappearing and there were but two weeks before I moved to McKinley. Once my dad had calmed down, the Summer had returned to normal. It was almost as if everything was in a holding pattern, where each week had followed a simple pattern. I worked at the hardware store, went to the dojo, had dinner with Tasha on Wednesday, a date with Emmy on Friday, and the usual triple date on Saturday. Liz was still grounded, but Emmy was allowed to...
September 1, 1981, McKinley, Ohio Tuesday wasn’t quite as crazy as Monday. My first class after breakfast was the biology seminar. After the first day, this would be run by Laura Peters, a graduate student. I immediately decided the seminar would be valuable, as she would provide study guides, sample lab reports, and a host of other useful information, as well as address any challenges we encountered in our first semester at Taft. The most important thing is that there would be no outside...
November 1, 1981, McKinley, Ohio It was just past midnight when I walked into the Landers’ house. “Hi, Mike,” Mrs. Landers said. “Nancy said you might show up. I’m glad you did!” “Hi, Mrs. Landers,” I replied. “Don’t mind me,” she smiled. “If you two want to go on to bed, that’s OK.” “You better call Ripley’s once more,” I grinned. “I’m going to turn Nancy down on her offer. Again.” Mrs. Landers laughed and shook her head, “I told her you were a keeper! Then I will go to bed so you can...
February 19, 1982, McKinley, Ohio “Angie!” I exclaimed, as I hurried toward the girls, who appeared tired, but otherwise OK. I took Angie in my arms and hugged her tightly. “Are you OK?” I asked. “Yes,” she said. “I’m sorry I’m late, but we were at the party and the police wouldn’t let us leave or make phone calls until they interviewed everyone who was there.” “What happened?” Melody asked. “A girl from the seventh floor was raped,” Jeannette said. “Who was it?” “Some girl named...
April 8, 1982, West Monroe, Ohio “Liz wanted me to talk to you,” I said to my mom on Thursday evening. “I assumed she’d put you up to this.” “I only promised to talk to you, and told Liz not to count on anything changing.” “Good call. We’ve given her as much freedom as your father and I think is reasonable. Has she talked to you about Paul Reynolds?” I nodded, “I know how she feels about him. But he’s in prison. Don’t forget she was raped before that, and anything that happened after the...
May 30, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio It was with more than a little trepidation that I drove home from karate class. I didn’t really want to talk to April, but I knew I had to. The bottom line was church. It didn’t matter to a lot of people, but it mattered to me. I feared that my conversation with April was simply going to go around in circles, and end with her crying again. Unfortunately, I didn’t see how that could be avoided. “You should go see her,” Mom said when I came downstairs after my...
June 10, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “OK, now I am SERIOUSLY worried about coming to church on Saturday!” I laughed as I put the car in gear. “And why is that Mishka Petrovich?” Tasha asked with a small laugh. “Your dad told me it was OK to take you for ice cream after dinner without me asking. I swear, if I come into church on Saturday for Vespers and the table is there with the crowns...” I was laughing and so was Tasha. “And being married to me would be so terrible?” she asked with fake...
June 15, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “Negative,” Liz whispered happily when I came home from work on Monday. “Thank God,” I said. We both had been on pins and needles since the previous Monday, and the news had come as a relief. Jocelyn and Dale had noticed I was on edge on Saturday night, and I’d pulled them aside briefly to tell them what had happened. They were both in agreement that I had no choice but to report the guy. Jocelyn offered to emasculate him with a rusty spoon, which had me...
August 22, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “What do you want to do today?” I asked Becky as we walked to my car. “Anything you want.” “Anything?” I smirked. “Like saying that was really a risk?” “You never know,” I chuckled. “What if it’s all been an act?” “HAS it all been an act?” she asked in a silly tone as I opened the passenger door for her. “Of course not!” I said, closing the door. I walked around the car and got in, started the engine, and backed out. “Not implying anything,” Becky...
November 20, 1981, McKinley, Ohio I got up from the couch and walked over to where Nancy was standing. She took my hand and led me to her bedroom where she shut and locked the door. She stood in front of me, and I held out my arms. She stepped forward and melted against me, sighing deeply as she put her head on my chest. I wrapped my arms tightly around her and held her. “I’ve wanted this for months,” she whispered. I moved one of my hands to lift Nancy’s chin so we could kiss. Our lips...
November 25, 1981, Rutherford, Ohio “Family Court for Harding County is now in session, Judge Martha Lee, presiding. You may be seated.” The small courtroom was packed with doctors, lawyers, and our family. Nobody from the general public was permitted because Liz was a minor. “Ladies and gentlemen,” Judge Lee said, “this is a status hearing on an emergency custody petition which I signed on Sunday evening. The procedure is a bit less formal than in a normal courtroom. That said, please...
June 5, 1981, West Monroe, Ohio “What do you want to do tonight?” I asked Emmy after she got into my Mustang on Friday evening. “Anything,” she said with a smile. “Whatever you want!” “There’s a new skydiving place that opened in Clermont County over by Cincinnati. I saw an ad in the newspaper.” “OK,” she laughed, “maybe not ANYTHING!” “Too exciting for you?” I laughed as I put the car in reverse and backed out of the driveway. “Too risky! What happens if your parachute doesn’t...