Determinisme Naturel
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"What?" Adam asked tired and still bleary-eyed.
"I am merely asking," Sarah said in a sanctimonious voice oozing with fake sincerity, "what the purpose of that bag of peanuts was last night? After we went upstairs, you were here playing on the willy substitute and shooting fuck knows what with ya takeaway and ya had peanuts. Why?"
Adam groaned, and scratched his testicles through the blue dressing gown. "Err ... to go with the beer."
"You mean the beer that was in the beer can there, there, there, there, there and there." Sarah pointed to eight discarded lager cans on the table and looked at him. "The cans that have stunk out the lounge all night of stale beer. Not to mention the takeaway cartons left there. Do you think we want to have our lounge smelling of curry and cheap lager?"
"Yeah OK, chill. It's a couple of cans, for god's sake," Adam said derisively and Sarah clenched her fists. "I'll move 'em. I always clean up in the morning. It's not a problem."
Sarah sighed loudly. "It is a problem. So I ask again, what is the point of the effin' peanuts?"
Adam hummed and held out his hands. "I don't get it."
"Because normally, I would think you eat peanuts, but you seem to scattered them to the four corners of the fucking room," Sarah snapped. "What is it? Is your mouth not big enough for a peanut this big?" Sarah's fingers moved millimetres apart and Adam looked at her in shock.
Adam screwed his face up. "Oh. You always miss a couple when you chuck them up in the air," he said defensively. "But I'll clean it up before I go to work."
"But I shouldn't find them the following morning. You clean up ya shit from the night before. We have outside bins for that and that and the twenty-two peanuts I found this morning."
Adam chortled in disbelief. "Seriously, you counted them? Fuckin' 'ell. Carl warned me about t'is. It's bang out of order, a few cans and I'll clear 'em up for fucks sake."
Sarah's scowl deepened and she pointed to a pile of peanuts on the small fireplace. "They need to go in the bin," she said firmly. "We like to keep the house tidy." Adam groaned and Sarah crossed her arms. "If you are going to live with us do try and be house-trained."
"Oh for fucks sake," Adam muttered.
"We dain't want to live with an untidy little shit."
"Oh fuck off," Adam snapped. "Leave me alone." He snatched at the small pile of rubbish he had left in front of the television and stuffing into the white carrier bag his takeaway was delivered in.
"Me fuck off? This is our house, and we don't want you here," Sarah replied back angrily. "But if you have to be here, then show us some respect."
"Well I didn't want to move in here either," Adam snapped. "And to be living with you lot. But I had no fucking choice."
Sarah went to reply but she glanced at the clock and swore, pushing past her new house mate with as much force as she could muster to get herself some breakfast.
Adam swore after her as he was bundled against the wall, calling her a "fuckin' witch" and glared after her, holding the carrier bag. He waited for a minute for her to finish in the kitchen before going to make himself some porridge and a cup of tea. He was beginning to hate Sarah, and Tabitha had made it perfectly clear the night before how much she disliked him; that only left Natalie and she didn't appear overly friendly.
He picked up his phone and texted Carl before leaving for work at the alarms factory where he was a supervisor. He had had a bad start to the day and just hoped it could only get better.
It didn't, two of his members of staff phoned in ill and then one of the machines broke so Adam spent most of the day not worrying about his little problem; he reasoned, that if the girls didn't like him then he would just stay out of their way and just live his life on his own.
Of course, the house was very small and Adam was used to having an entire flat and not just a box room to himself but if they didn't like him there was little he could do about it.
Adam opened the door to the sound of loud voices from the lounge and walked into the kitchen to get himself a drink. Although it wasn't a long walk to his employer he had sweated in his coat and wanted refreshment when he got home. He rubbed his hands on his dirty sweatshirt and walked back into the corridor, and then into the dining room.
He knew he would probably not be appreciated in the front room and took his half-drunk pint of water to sit down at the dining table, yawning. He just wanted five minutes peace and quiet to read his newspaper.
He was interrupted by the curvy Natalie, who grunted the moment she saw him. "Don't tell me you buy that shit," she said forcefully as she looked at the front page.
"What's wrong with it?" Adam asked as he sat down. "So it isn't the Guardian or the Times or whatever you read, but it's a solid decent paper."
"It's," Natalie stopped and rubbed her eyes. "It's a foul paper," she told him forcefully in a highly pronounced Scottish accent.
"It's just a newspaper," he sneered. "And, oh for fucks sake, can I do anything right?" He muttered and walked out of the room, coming face to face with Tabitha and a friend.
"You," her friend screamed. "He was with the one who attacked me in my car," she shrieked. "It was him."
"It wasn't," Adam said immediately. "It was Carl. I had nothing to do with it."
"He hit my car and did loads of damage," the girl shrieked. "He called me all sorts of names. Horrible names."
"No wonder he didn't want to move in," Natalie said behind him. "Bloody racist in our house."
"I am not a racist," Adam said quickly and rubbed his hands. "I..."
"You watched your friend walk out in the road and then attack my car while you sat back and cheered him on," the girl said firmly. "You encouraged him do a racist attack."
"Accessory," Tabitha chimed.
"I didn't and..." Adam started. "We didn't know he was going to do that. And you did try to kill him."
"He walked out into the road," she shouted. "He was lucky I didn't kill 'im."
"Bollocks," Adam cried. "You messed up and nearly hit him. He was a bit angry, probably said some things he shouldn't have. But you were being a shit driver 'cause ya a..."
"A what?" Tabitha asked forcefully. "So she's a shit driver. Is it 'cause she is black, she is a shit driver. Or because she is a woman?"
Adam shrugged, "she nearly killed a good friend of mine by her not paying attention to the road. Carl was out of order, but so were you."
The girl gasped and Adam felt his pockets; he had left his mobile phone somewhere. He saw it on top of his newspaper on the dining room table and strode in to get it as it vibrated.
"Arranging to go to the next BNP meeting?" Tabitha asked and Adam swore, grabbing the phone and pushing past her towards the front door.
With a snarl, Natalie picked up Adam's discarded newspaper and threw it into the bin. "Fucking twat," she muttered in annoyance as Adam slammed the front door.
He had been a resident for all of 24 hours and already he was feeling annoyed and angry. Why did the Sarah girl have to "go ballistic" at him in the morning; it was hardly as though she was going to be there all day to smell the remnants of his curry, and he was going to clear up before going to work even before she said anything.
Sarah hadn't accepted that it was the way he liked to keep his house clean and tidy. He would always clean up before going to work, and in the four years he had rented from Sarah's dad he had never had to speak to him about his rented property being in an inappropriate state; why couldn't Sarah understand that?
As for Tabitha accusing him of being a racist; well that was well out of order. He was in charge of two ethnic minorities at work and he never had any problems with them. Of course, Carl was a bit of a lad and he did have a small issue with certain sections of society, but that was just Carl. Tabitha didn't know him.
Natalie's problem with him was his newspaper – why should she object to the Daily Express? Sure, it might not have been her favourite paper, but it was hardly along the lines of the Daily Sport that was littered with nudity.
Adam tutted to himself; their problem with him was purely because he was a man and they just didn't want him around. He idly kicked at a pebble and watched as it bounced along the pavement and then made a satisfying ping on a lamp-post.
In true Beckham style, Adam looked up and brought his hand out in front of him, jumped onto his left foot, while his right swung around in an elaborate arc and struck the pebble to watch it fly off down the road, bounce once and hit a parked taxi.
Adam smiled briefly but then on seeing the taxi driver get out of his car, ran down a path to his left going into a house estate. He heard the Asian voice shouting at him and Adam sprinted down the alleyway, turned left and ran up the hill.
He didn't stop running for a couple of minutes and then looked up; it was at the end of the road where James lived and shrugged, looking back. He had no desire to see the girls any time soon and crossed the road to knock on his friend's door.
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Adam hesitated in the doorway as Natalie crossed her arms. "Well get 'em off then." "I've only just got in," he muttered as he looked around the room of naked girls watching him. Sarah was tapping away on her phone and looked up at him. "Well? I'm not answering you until I see skin." Adam sighed and pulled off his sweatshirt and then his grubby jeans as Natalie's eyes flicked towards his bobbing erection. While he soon got used to being around his house mates without getting...
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"I knew it. A bunch of dykes." The was silence as Adam looked all three of them. "Well I don't mind watch—" "We're naturists," Natalie interrupted sharply with a scowl. "What?" Natalie looked at the confused man and shook her head. "We are naturists. We like to live without clothes." Adam gulped. "You mean..." He started and his throat felt dry. "All the time?" The naked Sarah coughed and he tore his eyes away from her pert breasts and radiant skin, covering his crotch...
"I can't believe you talked me into this," Natalie cried as she downed a single vodka shot. "I could've been at home, being middle-aged. I'm 23 not 18." Adam laughed and took his vodka downing it and turning his shot glass upside down. "What dya fancy next?" Natalie looked up and down her set of glasses and picked the blended whisky which Adam matched from his set, they clinked it together and downed them. Natalie coughed, looking at him and tilting her head back up towards the...
"Sarah," Anne called and held out her hands to hug her daughter. "Sarah, how are you?" "I'm fine," Sarah said frostily. "Tabitha had a little girl, by the way." "A girl? Ahh, well, we got Adam's text message but we didn't know any more. How is she?" "She's fine," Sarah muttered and held her coffee tightly, looking around the empty coffee shop. "Keeping us awake half the night, but fine." There was silence for a minute as Sarah looked at her mother. "Well, you wanted to...
George Dayton pulled up at the house in Elm Park Road in his executive salon. He spotted the frustrated figure of Adam, sat on the garden wall and smoothed his jacket as he got out of the car. "Hiya," Adam called out to him and George nodded. There were a few people milling around but his property was in darkness and silent. "What's happened?" Adam sighed. "They reckon the guys next door put a chip pan on and didn't turn it off and then they went out," Adam said calmly to groans...
"Nat. Tab," Sarah called, the moment she opened the door. "Anyone home?" "In here," the booming voice of Tabitha answered from the lounge and Sarah turned right through a door at the foot of the stairs. "Ahh, we have a problem," she called out as she kicked off her shoes across the tiled hallway so they landed against the wall in heap. "You'll never guess what my stupid, pig-headed ... shit, Nat, are you OK?" Sarah paused as she looked down at the couch and saw her curvy house...
"Get out of my room," the tall girl screamed. "Get out and don't come back." "Ivy, come on girl. Let's just talk 'bout it." "You shafted that slut. And you got her pregnant. Where's my baby?" "I've tried, hun, you know I have. But maybe ya just barren." "Barren," Ivy screeched and threw the nearest object to hand – his can of deodorant which bounced off his head. "Get out of my room, get out of this house." "Oww," he cried. "Baby, lets talk. 'Cause I was thinking....
"Five grand," Sarah whispered and looked up as Adam opened the door. "Pardon?" Adam asked and Sarah scowled towards him. "I wasn't talking to you." "Sorry," Adam muttered, dismissing the teacher with an abrupt tone and leaving the room. Sarah watched him leave and then returned back to Natalie. "£250 to African Aid and another grand to build a mosque in Manchester. A further £250 to Let's Fight Racism and £1000 towards a Lesbian Student Advisory Service. Joined Greenpeace and a...
"I want him out," Tabitha told Sarah with crossed arms. "He is just simply not appropriate to live with us." "Yeah, I know," Sarah snapped and then apologised as she shook her head. "I'm sorry, I know. I tried talking to my Dad. Told him, Adam living with us was as appropriate as bacon sandwiches at the Middle East peace talks but he just said we will have to make do." Tabitha sighed. "But he is a racist. And he is so intolerant. And I daren't tell him our secret, can you imagine...
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The Fappening‘To me it’s not really a green. When I think green, I think of grass. That’s more like lemonade color.’ Erica’s nose was far too close to the glasses for my taste. Pouring the nearly clear absinthe over the rough-cut, cane-sugar cubes I favor, I tapped my spoon for a second to get her to back up. I wished I had my full setup here like I have at home, my Absinthe fountains water drippers are missed when I began to try and slowly pour water over the sugar cube. ‘Don’t you light it on fire?’ she...
Have you ever heard about a wonderful site called “Motherless”? I have a feeling that was a dumb question, of course, you fucking have. Well, I am here to talk about Motherless, but I shall also pay special attention to their Arab category. If you think Arabian sluts are hot, well you are in for a tasty treat, believe me.First, I should probably warn you that the name of this place comes from the fact that their content might be a bit too hardcore or questionable for some of you. Back in the...
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Harry and Rob sat in the local pub in their usual spot in the corner by themselves. They were having a discussion about what to do with Ethel. Rob has been adamant that he wants to hang Ethel by her ankles and butcher her. Harry strongly disagrees with him. Harry is convinced that if he talks to Ethel he can persuade her not to go to the authorities and they will be able to use her the same way the other men. Rob agrees to try Harry's way first but he says" if she wants to argue I'm going to...
kEthel sat with her tits nailed to the work table. Her tits were swollen to twice their normal size from the beating they had received from Harry and Rob and the axe handle. Ethel sobbed both from the pain and the feeling of despair and hopelessness. She knew she would not be able to sweet talk the men into letting her go without anymore abuse. Harry and Rob arrived and again Ethel begged and pleaded with them to let her go. The men laughed and told her they still had a few more things they...