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Gender Studies A story by Kayooger Note: The character of Dr. Neuman and his technology are from Morpheus' "Four Days." PART ONE: PROPOSAL "What makes a man a man? What makes a woman a woman? What defines our sex?" Dr. Miranda Meyer paced the front of her classroom, eyeing the students in her Advanced Theories in Gender Studies seminar. It was a small class, only 10 students, five male, five female. The gender balance had been ensured by Dr. Meyer when winnowing down the long list of applicants to one of the university's most popular courses -- popular both because Dr. Meyer was an extremely charismatic, energetic professor, and because she was a famously easy grader. In other semesters she hadn't been as strict about an exact split, nor would she have selected some of these applicants, but she had a specific project in mind, and these 10 young men and women were ideal candidates for it. "Is it one specific body part?" she asked. "Do your muscles make you a man, Chris?" she asked of Chris Truffant, strapping senior linebacker. Chuck Tam, with a reputation as both a class clown and campus stud, raised his hand. "I think you have another body part in mind, Dr. Meyer," he said, while exaggeratedly spreading his legs. Meyer smiled. "Maybe you're right, Chuck. But I have a way we may be able to find out for sure. And it's one that would spare you all the hassle of a final exam or term paper." That had their attention. "What would we have to do?" asked Ashley Parker, one of three Theta Pi sorority sisters in the class and a young lady of impeccable style and grooming. "Well, it's a little unconventional, but with the help of one of my colleagues from our school of engineering, you would all find a way to see how the other half lives." "Engineering? Is he going to build me some kind of tranny push-up bra?" asked Dimitri Karros, an aspiring musician working the heavily-tattooed, buzz-cut, goateed look expected of him. "Not exactly, but gender-bending will be involved. You will be paired off into five opposite sex duos, and each of you will swap some traits, be they physical, mental or both, for one week." "Swap?" asked Gina Wong, petite and graceful, a sophomore gymnast. "What do you mean by that?" "Exactly what I said," replied Dr. Meyer. "Dr. Neuman has a device that could take something from a man's body and put it on a woman's and vice versa." That *really* had their attention. "You're, like, kidding, right?" asked Beth Van Dyke, another Pi Theta and Paris Hilton wannabe. "No, I've heard about this," said Ron Howser, drummer in Dimitri's band and an energetically nerdy boy whose midterm essay had been about gender stereotypes on the "Superfriends" cartoon. "A friend of mine is in Dr. Neuman's quantum mechanics class, and he's done all kinds of freaky stuff there. There was some fat kid who suddenly got real skinny, and a skinny one got fat, you know? He sent me the before and after pictures on my cell phone. I can show them to you if you want." Before Dr. Meyer could stop them, the entire class was gathered around Ron's chair, marveling at the blurry images on his phone. "No way," insisted Kelly Rhodes, a Theta Pi blonde with the sort of curvaceous body for which wars have been started. "Dude, that's just Photoshopped," insisted Tommy Duggan, a muscular shooting guard on the men's basketball team. "I don't think so," said Valerie Wolensky, a cute but shy girl who had a tendency to blush once every three minutes during Dr. Meyer's lectures. "Everybody take your seats, please," said Dr. Meyer. "I can assure you that those photos and Dr. Neuman's technology is real, and if you're interested, you can find out tomorrow. Are you all interested? It has to be an all-or-nothing proposition." "I don't know," said Valerie. "This sounds dangerous." "My buddy said the fat guy and the skinny guy got switched back a few days later without a problem," said Ron. "What would you be swapping for each of us?" asked Ashley. "That I can't tell you in advance, as your immediate reaction to the change will be part of the project, along with each of you keeping a video diary, meeting with me for interviews at various stages of the experiment, and a few other details we can get into once the transformations have taken place." "I think it sounds kind of cool," said Dimitri. "I'm in." "Me, too," said Gina. One by one, all the students agreed. The longest hold-outs were Chris, who finally gave in to appease Kelly, his on-again, off-again, currently-on girlfriend for most of college; and Valerie, who needed 10 minutes of cajoling from the other students and reassurances from Dr. Meyer. "Wonderful," Dr. Meyer finally said. "Then I'll see you all at Bennett Hall tomorrow morning at 10 a.m. Be ready for the most unusual week of your lives." PART TWO: CHANGES The following morning, the class arrived at Bennett Hall, some looking the worse for wear from the night before, which had included a long set for Dimitri and Ron's band, a Theta Pi rager for the sorority girls and the jocks, a threesome for Chuck (which he would not stop bragging about) and a cram session for another class for Valerie and Gina. "Does anybody really think this is going to work?" asked Chuck. "I hope so," said Gina. "I don't want to have to take a test if it doesn't. I'd like one simple grade this semester." They entered a waiting room where they were greeted by Dr. Meyer, her two teaching assistants Mark and Brian, and a tall, skinny man in his mid- '50s, wearing a white lab coat and a crazy mess of white hair to match. "This must be the mad scientist," muttered Chris. "Class, may I introduce you to Dr. Neuman?" said Dr. Meyer. "Dr. Neuman, these are my students." Neuman barely looked at them, kept darting his eyes to the windows and the exits as he said, "Wonderful, wonderful. Shall we begin?" "Okay, our first couple will be Dimitri and Ashley," said Dr. Meyer. "Come this way, please." The two stood and studied each other, wondering what traits they would be exchanging, and followed the two professors into a large adjacent room containing two glass and metal boxes that resembled telephone booths, with wires and cables connecting them. "Whoa," said Dimitri. "Remove all your clothing, please," said Dr. Neuman, as Mark turned on a video camera. "Here?" asked Ashley. "Why do we have to be naked? And on camera?" "There have been, um, problems when clothing has been involved in the process before," said Dr. Neuman. "And chronicling the immediate changes to your bodies in real time is an important part of the project," said Dr. Meyer. "Rest assured, the recordings will be used for purely academic purposes." "I'm sure some academic is going to have a lot of fun with the part where Kelly turns up in the buff," cracked Dimitri. "Or Chris," said Ashley. "Let's be fair." Dimitri shrugged and quickly stripped, dropping his shirt, khakis, sneakers and underwear in a random pile at his feet. After a moment, Ashley followed suit far more slowly and carefully, making sure to neatly fold her sundress and underwear and place them next to her sandals. Dimitri tried to avert his eyes, but they were drawn to the bright red triangle of pubic hair that Ashley was quickly moving to cover with her hand. "The male subject will go into the left booth, the female into the right," said Dr. Neuman. Each stepped into their respective chamber. Dr. Neuman closed the doors and stepped over to the control panel. After a moment, the chambers lit up and began to loudly hum, and Dimitri felt a chill moving up and down his body, followed by an unexpected sensation: hair tickling the back of his neck, then his shoulders, then down to the middle of his back. He grabbed a handful of it and realized it had the auburn color and silky consistency of Ashley's. "Wow," he said, as his eyes were drawn to the arm grabbing the hair. His tattoos were fading rapidly, as was the coarse black hair that covered those arms --and his chest and legs and everywhere else. The humming stopped and the lights turned down so Dimitri could see his reflection in the glass. He now had Ashley's hair -- or lack thereof -- all over his body, from the plucked and arched eyebrows to that little red triangle he had just been so turned on by. He also had her creamy white skin -- complete with all the lipstick, eyeliner and other makeup Ashley had been wearing that morning -- her manicured, fire-engine red fingernails and toenails, and not a single tattoo anywhere. Dr. Meyer opened the chamber, smiling broadly. "Don't you look wonderful," she told him. Dimitri looked over to Ashley exiting the other chamber, knowing what he would be seeing but still not believing it. Ashley had his body hair, his beard, his buzz cut, the dragon tattoos that used to run up and down both his arms -- all of it. Even her breasts were hairy, much to her chagrin. "I'm a circus freak," she said. "Ugh." "No," said Dr. Meyer reassuringly. "You're part of groundbreaking research." "What does switching our hair and skin prove?" Ashley asked. "We'll find out," said Dr. Meyer. "That's why it's science. But you may be reassured to know that you two have one of the more mild transformations. Physically, your genders are intact, even if it may not appear that way when you're dressed." Ashley, still in shock, and Dimitri moved over to the piles of clothing. Ashley held up the sundress. It showed a lot of skin, which had been just fine a few minutes ago and now was not fine at all. "I can't go out wearing this," she said. "Wanna swap clothes?" offered Dimitri after a moment. "You'd do that?" asked Ashley. "Why not? I'm going to look like a girl no matter what, might as well dress like one. Plus," he said, wiggling his painted toes, "who wants to hide these babies in sneakers?" After some haggling over who would wear whose underwear (Ashley still needed a bra for support, though Dimitri's baggier clothes made her breasts largely invisible to the casual observer), they quickly got cross- dressed and exited, followed by Brian and his second video camera into the debriefing room, to wait for the next couple to join them. That turned out to be Tommy and Gina, also wearing each other's clothes, not for vanity's sake but to accommodate even more radical physical changes. Tommy, who had once been 6'4" and muscular, was now only 5'2" and rail- thin, while Gina had gone the opposite way. Gina still had some semblance of a womanly figure -- at least as much as she'd had originally (like most gymnasts, she had small breasts and mild hips) -- and Tommy was built more like a boy than a woman, but beyond that they each had the other's basic size and shape. "Ho. Ly. Shit," said Dimitri. "I could say the same to you," said Tommy, doing a double-take at Ashley's new facial hair and Dimitri's flawless skin. "They switched your size?" asked Ashley. "More than that," said Gina. "Our height and our muscles and, according to Dr. Meyer, our athletic ability." "Watch this," said Tommy, as he did three rapid handsprings, followed by a deep split. "Or this," said Gina, who picked up the basketball Tommy had been carrying and did some fancy crossover dribbling. "That is pretty cool," said Ashley. "Even if my hands were still big enough to do that," said Tommy, studying his petite new digits, "I don't think I'd know how to right now. I'm just glad basketball season's over, or Coach would kill me." "And it's nice to be the big one for a change," said Gina, who flexed a large bicep. The four sat down to marvel at each other's transformations, and a few minutes later Chuck and Valerie came out. Both were wearing their own clothes, but something wasn't quite right. Chuck looked ashen, and Valerie was red-faced. "Didn't they change you guys?" asked Gina. "It's gone!" moaned Chuck. "It's gone!" "What's gone?" asked Tommy. "IT!" wailed Chuck. "Now she has it!" Valerie, still blushing furiously, moved up to Ashley to whisper in her ear, but before she could even speak, Ashley knew what it was from the bulge pressing into her from Valerie's midsection. "You got his thing?" Ashley asked, laughing uproariously. "That's hysterical!" "Shhh!!!!" insisted Valerie, more embarrassed than ever. "Oh my god," said Gina, pointing to Valerie's rapidly-tenting skirt, "she's got a boner!" "That's my boner!" complained Chuck, whose pants seemed especially baggy at the moment. "Dude, then you have..." said Dimitri. "A'yep," said Chuck. "I am the proud owner of her virginal little pussy. Her other lady parts, too. Dr. Meyer even told me to be careful so I wouldn't get pregnant." "You are not going to have sex with my, my... my flower!" said Valerie. "Like I would want to," muttered Chuck who, without realizing it, had crossed his legs in a very feminine style. "And you better wear a condom. I don't want to get Big Chuck back with some social disease." "You think I..." Valerie started to say before all the air rushed out of her head and she began to faint. Tommy moved in to catch her, not remembering he was now much lighter and weaker, and both crumpled to a heap on the floor. "Dr. Meyer! Help!" Dimitri called, while Gina picked up Valerie in one arm, Tommy in the other, and helped them into two adjacent chairs. Dr. Meyer rushed in, trailed by Dr. Neuman and by Ron and Beth, who seemed unchanged, other than their swapped wardrobes. "Is everything all right?" Dr. Meyer asked. "Valerie fainted," explained Ashley. "With my boner," griped Chuck. "She had an erection?" asked Dr. Meyer, obviously pleased. "Does anyone know what she was thinking about at the time?" As the gender-mixed-and-matched students looked at each other, not sure how to respond to this, Dr. Neuman examined Valerie and Tommy. Dimitri went over to get the scoop from Ron, who looked very silly in Beth's pink blouse and frilly skirt. "Oh my god, your hair looks awesome, Dimitri!" squealed Ron, who immediately reached out to touch Dimitri's silky new locks, then to study his hands and his arms and the rest of his changes. "You're, like, so lucky." "Sweet. This is like that 'Gilligan's Island' episode with the friendly physician," said Beth, who was tapping Ron's drumsticks against the back of a chair. "Or maybe that Superman comic where Myxyzptlk turned Superman into Superwoman and Lois Lane into Louis Lane." "So, um, what did you guys change?" asked Dimitri, though he suspected he knew the answer. "Theirs was a purely mental swap," explained Dr. Meyer. "They have the core of each other's personalities: their likes and dislikes, their manner of speaking, etc." "Then why are they wearing each other's clothes?" asked Ashley. "They don't have anything to hide." "Like I would be caught dead wearing a loud Hawaiian shirt and jeans from Sears!" sneered Ron. "I'll buy something more flattering later. Beth, loan me your plastic, 'kay?" "It's in my purse, which you're already wearing, duh," said Beth. "So, wait, are you Beth now?" Ashley asked Ron. "And she's Ron?" "No," said Beth. "I'm still me. I remember my parents and sorority rush and everything else. I just... I'm into other things now, I think." "Yeah, all that dorky crap I used to obsess over," said Ron, who then flashed back to something Beth had just said. "Oh, god. Which one of us gets to be in Theta Pi for the next week?" "We can figure all of that out once the final transformation is complete," said Dr. Meyer, who looked to Dr. Neuman for approval. "Both subjects are undamaged," said Dr. Neuman, talking about Tommy and Valerie as if they were lab mice or car parts or something else impersonal. "Wonderful. So let's finish up Phase One," said Dr. Meyer, as she and Dr. Neuman headed back into the lab. "The only ones left are Chris and Kelly, right?" asked Dimitri. "Yeah," said Chuck. "What's left to change, though?" Almost everything, it turned out. Kelly emerged from the lab a few minutes later, wearing Chris's t-shirt and track pants. From the neck up, she was still the blonde bombshell. From the neck down, though, she was an All- American tackling machine, not as tall as Gina now was, but wider and stronger, and the tightness of the pants showed that, like Valerie, she now had an impressive piece of male equipment. "I don't know whether to be turned on or disgusted by that," marveled Ashley. At the discussion of arousal, Valerie blushed again. Then came Chris, his chiseled jaw topping an impossibly soft, curvy body that was squeezed into a backless halter and Daisy Duke shorts. Where Tommy had walked confidently in his new proportions, Chris seemed uncertain in his movements, teetering on his platform sandals and knocking his ample hips this way and that. "I keep feeling like I'm going to break something," said Kelly. "And I feel like I'm going to get broken," said Chris, who finally gave in and slipped his now slender feet out of the shoes. Dr. Meyer followed, and as Mark and Brian continued to videotape everything, she gathered her transformed flock together. "As you can see, you've been through a variety of changes: cosmetic, muscles and size, sex organs, personality, and complete physical exchange. "In addition to the parameters we discussed in class yesterday," she went on, "there are some additional ground rules. For those of you borrowing some physical aspect of your partner, you are not to make any significant changes. Ashley, for instance, can't shave and Dimitri can't get a haircut or a tattoo. Those of you with borrowed sex organs must use protection if you choose to have sex, both to avoid disease and, if it comes to that, pregnancy. Any drastic physical changes could complicate Dr. Neuman's reversal process." "There can be complications?" said Chuck. "You promised that we'd all be put back to normal in a week." "And you will be," Dr. Meyer reassured him. "You just have to be careful. Obviously, there will be adjustments required, so I'd like each of you to spend the rest of the day with your respective partners, learning as much as you can about each other -- and, if need be, making arrangements about wardrobe, lodging, and whatever other issues arise. I'd like you to record as much of your interactions as possible with the cameras Mark and Brian will provide, and if you have any concerns, don't hesitate to call me on my private number." "What if we want to change back now?" asked Chris. He was poking at his breasts, until Kelly grabbed his hand away, more forcefully than either one was expecting. He winced in pain. "Sorry, Chris," Kelly apologized. "I don't know your own strength -- my own strength. Whatever." "And that is the sort of thing you'll have to start learning today," said Dr. Meyer. "As to your question, Chris, it can't be done. First, because your bodies need 18 hours to adjust to Dr. Neuman's process before any additional exposure to the machine is possible. Second, because I need all 10 of you for my study to have validity." "Come on, Chris," said Tommy, "be a man." "That's easy for you to say," said Chris. "At least you're still a guy... underneath." "And I'm not," said Chuck, "and I'm dealing. Just because you have a pussy doesn't mean you have to be one." Gina put her now large arm on Chuck's shoulder. "Let's try not to be so crude and sexist, okay?" "Sorry, ma'am," said Chuck. "Sir. Whatever." They were all having noun and pronoun trouble. "This'll be fun, Chris!" insisted Kelly. "I can dress you up in all my favorite outfits! You'll be like a Barbie doll!" "That's not helping, Kelly," sighed Chris. He looked around at his classmates, all of them radically changed in some way, and sighed. "What the hell. My daddy didn't raise a quitter." He paused for a second and looked at his now muscle-bound girlfriend. "But you're not due for your period, right?" "No, sweetie," she said, wrapping her arms around him. "That's not for another week and a half." "By which point you will all be restored to normal," said Dr. Meyer. "And on that note, it's time for you all to get oriented." PART THREE: EQUIPMENT MALFUNCTION Chuck and Valerie sat in the dorm room she shared with her best friend Wanda, who was out of town until late that night and didn't know anything about the experiment. Valerie shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "How do you sit with this thing?" she asked. "Or walk with it? It always feels like it's in the way." "That's because you're still trying to sit and move like Little Miss Prim and Proper, when you're now the proud owner of the biggest, baddest snake on campus," he told her, as she glared at him. He knelt in front of her, put his hands on her knees and pulled her legs apart. She flinched, but he also got a foot in there to kick her feet apart. "Relax," Chuck said. "I'm just showing you a better way to sit. I'm not going to have my way with you." "You couldn't, anyway," noted Valerie, who realized that she did feel much more comfortable with her legs splayed out like this. She made a mental note to start wearing pants for the duration of the experiment. "I've been thinking, though," Chuck said, as he demonstrated several ways to stand and walk that would keep her new equipment out of the way. "About what?" she asked. "Remember how I said I had no interest in breaking your flower? Well, I'm still not into dudes, but it occurred to me that if you and I did it..." "No," Valerie insisted, backing away. This was making her more uncomfortable by the minute. She was a good girl, a wholesome girl who had barely even been on kissing dates, and now she had a, a penis! And some boy had her vagina! And he wanted them to have sex! This was a nightmare. "No, no, no!" "Hear me out, hear me out," Chuck said. "If you and I did it, it wouldn't be like gay sex or anything. It'd be more like masturbation, since it'd be our own junk. Plus, if you're really a virgin like you say, I could break in your pussy for you. I hear it's always painful the first time, anyway, and you wouldn't have to ever experience that." "You are the grossest man I have ever met," said Valerie, whose new body part immediately betrayed her by standing at attention. She was near tears. "Oh, why does it keep doing that?" "Maybe it's confused, being attached to a girl's body and getting touched all the time by girl's hands," said Chuck, amused. "Or maybe it's like when it first went through puberty with me, and everything got it hard. Or maybe you really want to do me." "How do I make this go away?" Valerie asked, as she felt her lacy panties begin to rip from the strain. Finally, she just tore the panties off altogether in frustration. "Wow," said Chuck. "I don't know if it's just me seeing it from a new angle, or you being a girl, but Big Chuck looks even bigger on you." He saw how confused and afraid she felt and said, "You've got three choices here, and the first two are iffy. One, try thinking about the least attractive thing possible. Ordinarily, I'd say think of a girl, but I don't know if you're doing the thinking or Big Chuck is. Two, cold showers sometimes work, but not if you're feeling really hard and horny." "And three?" Valerie asked, afraid to admit how good this throbbing feeling was -- or that images of both attractive men and women were flashing through her head. "Beat off or get off with some girl -- or me. Again, I'm happy to help you in your time of need. After all, you're only going to have a cock once. Might as well find out what it's like." Valerie stared at Chuck for a minute, then went into her bathroom and slammed the door behind her. "Oh, so you want privacy for your first wank," said Chuck. "That's cool." "Shut up, pig!" yelled Valerie through the door. Chuck could hear the sound of the shower running. "If that doesn't work," he said, "you can always make the water warmer and use the soap to get yourself off." "Go away!" she yelled. "Come back in 20 minutes with some of your underwear! These panties are useless!" Chuck eyed the torn pair on the floor, then started going through Valerie's underwear drawer. He drew out several pairs of panties and let himself out. PART FOUR: MAKE-UP TIPS Dimitri's eyes widened as Ashley reached into the bag she had packed and pulled out one styling product after another: moisturizer, special cleanser, a mud mask, shampoo, conditioner, three different hairbrushes, a hairdryer with multiple attachments, and on and on. "Do you do anything all day but sit at the mirror?" he asked her. "Once you get used to it, it doesn't take long at all, and it's totally worth it," she said, then half-proved Dimitri's point by spending the next two hours explaining how to remove and apply makeup, style his hair, keep his skin clean, etc. "Do I really have to do all this?" he complained. "Yes," she said firmly. "I spend a lot of time maintaining that skin and hair, and you're not going to return it to me with pimples or split ends or knots or anything else, okay?" "Okay, okay," he said. He noticed her half-walking in place. "Do you need to use my bathroom?" "No, it's just so itchy down in my crotch now," she said, wincing. "Is there anywhere you don't have these short 'n curlies?" "Sorry, I come from a line of very hairy men," he said. "And I have to admit, it felt kinda nice, the breeze blowing against my smooth legs in this dress." "Then you're in luck," she said, reaching for the second bag. "I brought over nothing but skirts and dresses." "In for a penny, in for a pound, right?" Dimitri said. "You're taking this a lot better than I am, I think," she said. "Doesn't it freak you out that you look so feminine now?" "But it's the whole point of Dr. Meyer's experiment. Besides, I like women. I've known a lot of great women in my life. I don't think it's so terrible to look like one for a few days." He noticed her staring at him with a slight smile. "What?" "And here I thought you were some macho heavy metal shithead," she said. "You surprise me." "Good," he said, slipping into the bathroom to try applying the makeup on his own. "And we're not a heavy metal band. I just like to look a little badass. Mostly we play power-pop stuff. Ron's influence. Do you play anything?" "Took piano lessons for 15 years, and I was third soloist in my high school choir, if that counts." "It does. Everything does. Now how do I look?" he asked, emerging from the bathroom. She stepped back and studied him. "Really hot, I have to say. You're skinny enough to wear any of my clothes and look good in them, even with no breasts. You've got these high cheekbones and full lips that aren't as noticeable behind the beard, but clean your face up and slap the right coat of paint on, and you make a foxy-looking chick." "Who knew?" He studied his reflection in the mirror. "I'd do me." She stood next to him and looked decidedly less pleased. "I'm sorry, but I feel really gross right now. I just want to wax everything and buy a wig." "You'll get used to it," he said. "Plus, there's a bonus. Let me show you my beauty routine." He went back into the bathroom and returned a moment later with a bar of Irish Spring and a pair of electric clippers. He tossed them on the bed in front of her. "That's it. Now go with God." PART FIVE: WE CAN WORK IT OUT Chris kept turning backwards in semi-circles, hoping none of his buddies from the football team happened to be in the gym at the moment. He would have been fine hiding out in his apartment or Kelly's room at Theta Pi for the next week, but she had insisted on putting her new muscles through their paces. Where he still felt off-balance and squishy, she was obviously enjoying this. On the walk over from Bennett Hall, she had stopped several times to do pull-ups on sturdy tree branches, and she even slung him over her shoulders for a minute until he yelled at her to put him back down. "Now you want to take it easy," Chris told Kelly as she settled in on the weight bench at the gym. He could no longer even load the barbell himself, but he told her what to get. "My football career's over, but I still don't want to pull a muscle, or, worse, get a tear." "This is going to be so cool," Kelly said, clapping her hands together in giddy anticipation. She took a deep breath, gripped the bar, and brought it down and up so easily and quickly that it nearly flew out of her hands. Luckily, another guy was standing nearby and helped her with the spot. "That's way too light for you, man," the guy said to Kelly. Then he got a load of Chris from behind and his smile brightened. "Well, hello there. Are you two together?" Chris turned around, and up close there was no disguising his masculine face, especially after he said in a very deep voice. "Yes. Now get lost, tough guy." The guy did a very long double-take and walked away, but he kept looking back to stare at both of them on his way to the locker room. Kelly giggled. "Oh my god, he was totally hitting on you!" "Shut up, Kelly," he said, again wondering why he agreed to go through with this. "Why wouldn't he? You're slammin'." She stood up and put her meaty hand on his round, firm bottom. She leaned down and kissed him on the shoulder, and a wave of pleasure went down his spine. "How did you know how to do that?" he asked, looking up at her. "I know what that body likes," she said. She whispered in his ear, "Especially in the bedroom, if you know what I mean." Chris backed away. Kelly advanced on him. "What's the matter, baby?" she asked. "I don't know that I'm ready for, you know... that. This is too much already. Maybe it was a bad idea for us to hook up again right before we did this stupid experiment." "Okay, okay," she said, stepping back towards the weight bench. "So let's see how strong I really am --no holding back -- and then I'll take you to yoga class so you can see how I keep in shape. Don't worry about the other thing. It'll be like we're still broken up." "Good, good," he said, directing her towards the weights. "For now," she whispered to herself. PART SIX: SHE SHOOTS... Tommy insisted that he and Gina put their getting-to-know-you orientation on hold, as he had promised his girlfriend Claire that he would come see her as soon as he was done with whatever Dr. Neuman was going to do to him. So instead Gina walked over to one of the outdoor basketball courts. She couldn't get over how it felt to be so tall, so big and powerful. She loomed over almost everybody she passed on the sidewalk, and when she accidentally bumped into some jerk who was too busy talking on his cell phone to look where he was going, he was the one who got knocked off- balance, not her. Even stranger was how natural it all felt -- the size and the strength and, especially, the basketball part. The court was empty when she arrived, but she had Tommy's ball and quickly went through an assortment of layups and dunks that she wouldn't have even been able to name a few hours before, let alone do. On one dunk, she went up very strong, stuffed the ball through the hoop with both hands and hung on the rim for what felt like several glorious hours. "Hey, you want to play in our game, dude?" a male voice from behind her asked as she let go and jumped to the ground. She turned around and saw three guys who would have dwarfed her before but now seemed relatively small. "Whoa, are you a girl?" one of them asked when they got a better look at her. "Yeah, I'm Gina," she said, as she leaned over to shake that one's hand. "Damn, Gina, you got some mitts on you," he said, still appraising her. "Some guns, too. I'm Dwight, this is Marshall, and that's Kenneth." "Do you play for the women's team?" asked Kenneth. "No, I'm usually a gymnast," she said, laughing. "It's a long story. I'll explain it to you after Dwight and I whip your butts in half-court, okay?" PART SEVEN: ...HE SCORES "That was, like, the most amazing sex we've ever had," gasped Tommy's girlfriend Claire. "Really?" asked Tommy, drenched in sweat but feeling less winded than he often did after the deed was done. He wondered if Gina's body had been in even better condition than his own. "Yeah," said Claire. "No offense, but sometimes you're a little rougher than you need to be. But now I get to control the action a little more, and you're so... limber." He grinned, thinking back to all the positions he never would have contemplated before but that he had just pulled off with ease. "Gina must be a hellcat in the sack." "Well, you know what they say about gymnasts," said Claire. She stood up and stretched. At 5'11" -- the height had been the thing that initially drew him to her -- she was now the giant in the relationship. "Stand up, I want to get a better look at you." He did so, and she paced around his new naked form, giggling as she loomed over him. "I like looking down at you for a change," she said, still studying. "Interesting." "What?" he asked. "For the most part, you have a guy's proportions, just smaller, but those are some pretty girly legs and that," she cupped his tight little butt, "is a very round, sweet behind." "I guess that's what Gina's leg and butt muscles are like. Still, this is nothing. You should see Chris's ass." "I wish you had taken pictures or something. I'm trying to imagine what everybody looks like now, but it's too weird. When you walked in that door, I didn't believe it was you for a second. Aren't you totally wigged- out by this?" "A little," he admitted. "But it's sort of cool. Watch this. " Slowly, he lifted his left leg so it was practically pointed straight in the air, his hand holding up his ankle, his balance on the other leg more than enough to keep him standing. "You've just given me about 17 different filthy ideas, young man," said Claire, as it occurred to Tommy that maybe he and Gina didn't need to get together until tomorrow to swap clothes and advice. PART EIGHT: LET'S GO TO THE MALL (TODAY) "Are you done yet?" asked Beth. Ron had dragged her on an all-day odyssey through the mall, as he bought (with her credit card, not that she minded so much) an entire new wardrobe, styling products and more. Beth could recognize that she used to love this mall more than any place on earth, but at the moment all she could think about was how it didn't have a decent comic shop or used record store. "And voila!" said Ron, emerging from the dressing room wearing ironed slacks, a crisp pink shirt, Armani jacket and about eight pounds of styling gel in his hair. "You look like you should be on Queer Eye," said Beth. "It's called being metrosexual," snapped Ron. "Look it up. And I can't believe you'd rather be wearing those hideous thrift store clothes of mine instead of some of the beautiful outfits in your own closet." "This stuff's more comfortable," she said, "and I felt stupid when you made me try on that dress." "Evs," said Ron, which had been Beth's new go-to term, short for "whatever." As they walked to Ron's van -- which Beth now had to drive, since apparently knowing how to drive stick-shift had been part of their swap -- Beth was whistling an old Matthew Sweet song when they were passed by two big, good-looking guys. Ron's head turned around to follow them; Beth's didn't. "Those guys had smokin' bods," Ron told her. "Why didn't you check them out?" "I don't know," Beth shrugged. "Didn't really notice." She went back to whistling the song, then lost her breath and concentration when a blonde in a mini-skirt and spike heels emerged from her car. When the blonde was out of sight, the two of them stopped to look at each other. "Dude, exactly how much did we swap?" asked Beth. PART NINE: FUN WITH ROOMMATES "Hey Val, I'm home," called Wanda as she entered the dorm. It was the middle of the night, and Valerie was asleep in her bed with her back to the door, but Wanda knew Valerie would want to be woken up to say hi and find out how her trip went. Wanda put down her bags, walked over to Valerie's bed, and pulled off the covers. Valerie rolled onto her back, still mostly asleep, and Wanda was stunned to see that her friend was wearing boys' underpants --with what looked like a massive hard-on trying to burst out of them. She screamed, waking Valerie from her slumber. She opened her eyes, saw it was Wanda and tried to spring out of bed to explain, but the latest in what seemed to be an endless series of erections got in the way. She tripped, crashed into Wanda and fell to the floor on top of her. "I have to stop falling down," she muttered as she tried to untangle her body from Wanda's. "Valerie, what the fuck!" asked Wanda as she scooted as far away as she could in their small dorm room. "Is that what I think it is?" "It is," said Valerie, "but I can explain. Just calm down, please!" While Wanda insisted they sit on opposite sides of the room, Valerie explained about Dr. Meyer's project, and Dr. Neuman's machine, and the changes it had put them all through. "I can't believe that's actually possible," Wanda gasped, her eyes now locked on the bulge in Valerie's BVD's. "Can I see it?" Valerie blushed for the thousandth time of the day. "Really?" "I feel like I need to, you know?" Valerie stuck her thumbs in the elastic waistband of her underpants, pushed them down around her ankles and stood up straight. "Wow," said Wanda. "That is so cool!" "It won't go down," moaned Valerie. "I tried everything Chuck said. Well, almost everything. But even when it goes away for a little bit, something new gets its attention. I tried going to the library to study, and I wound up having to hide in the stacks until it calmed down long enough for me to make it home. Everything gets it excited!" Wanda's eyes were very wide now. Where Valerie was sexually inexperienced by choice, Wanda had spent most of their freshman year lamenting her difficulty getting laid. She wasn't ugly, but she was quiet and bookish and had a hard time getting noticed by guys. And here was this big (she didn't have much experience, but she knew enough to realize this was much larger than average), purple, stiff as a board cock right in front of her. So what if it belonged to her female best friend? She walked across the room. "Can I touch it?" she asked, trying very hard to conceal her excitement. "Um, okay," said Valerie, nervous but wanting to trust Wanda. Wanda put her hand around the shaft, and Valerie moaned, this time not with discomfort but with pleasure. "It's so warm," said Wanda, as she slid her hand back and forth along the surface. "I didn't know it would be this warm." "Oh my god, please don't stop doing that!" exclaimed Valerie with a ferocity that surprised both of them. Wanda licked her lips and continued. "This is going to be a very interesting night," she thought. PART TEN: MAKE-UP TIPS, TAKE TWO "Dimitri, how do you get your lipstick looking so good?" asked Chuck. "Easy," Dimitri said, and he did a quick demonstration with the makeup in his purse. "Wow, you're really good at that," said Chuck, who couldn't get over how much like a woman -- a very pretty woman, at that -- Dimitri looked. The makeup wasn't overstated, working with his facial features, and the wet red lipstick was a fine match with the flowing red hair. "It's been three days now, and I've been practicing a lot," said Dimitri. "Why do you want to know?" "Because I think the only way I'm going to get laid this week is if I look like a girl," said Chuck. He explained that on the first two nights since the transformation, he had picked up a different girl and gone back to her place, but each time he pulled his pants off, she went nuts and ordered him to leave. "Guess they're not into hermaphrodites," he said. "So you think looking like a girl will help how?" Dimitri asked while re- moisturizing his elbows. "Lesbians, bro. Lesbians are my salvation. I dress up like a chick, go to one of those rug-muncher bars off campus, and go home with some lipstick lesbo hottie." "Isn't that false advertising?" "How? I'm technically a woman now, and I'm into women. I'd say that makes me a lesbian. I just need to look the part. I figure maybe a wig, a push- up bra, some borrowed clothes and whatever makeup mojo Ashley taught you, and I'm golden. We will eat each other out all night long." Dimitri thought about it. "Okay, but on one condition: Beth and I get to come. I want to see this when it blows up in your face." "Beth? Why Beth? I thought you and Ron were the buddies." "Not right now. It's weird, like he's still sort of Ron, but not. Beth and I have been hanging out more the last two nights. I even think she's going to play drums in the Battle of the Bands on Friday." "Dude, Beth's wicked hot," said Chuck, "especially now that she's not being so stuck-up. You should totally do her." Dimitri shook his head and laughed. "I don't think so. I'm bringing her because I think she's technically a lesbian now, too." Chuck laughed, too. "No way! That's awesome! So does that mean Ron's..." "Yep. It's been very strange around the breakfast table, me in my silk nightie and Ron all over some random guy. He got lucky twice in two nights. I don't know if he had that much sex in two years when he was straight." They stood up and began walking towards Dimitri's apartment. Dimitri was wearing a pink sweater set, his heels click-clacking on the pavement in a pair of Ashley's black slingbacks, a silk skirt swaying with him as he walked. "Can I ask you something: Is that hard to do?" Chuck asked, pointing at the shoes. "Took me like a day of practicing, and it hurts like hell after 20 minutes or so of walking, but they look really good on me, and I'm trying to get the full experience. Now let me ask you something." "Shoot." "When those girls shot you down for having Valerie's equipment, did you take care of business on your own?" Chuck stopped him and put a hand on his arm. "Bro, you have no idea. You have no frikking idea how amazing the female orgasm feels. I barely was able to leave my house to come see you. I have half a mind to spend the rest of the week just touching myself, it's so awesome." "But you want to try it with a partner instead." "Yeah." "Have you thought about a guy?" "No way, bro," said Chuck. "Not going there for a million bucks. So let's get with the lip gloss already." PART ELEVEN: EVICTED "There's been a vote, um, ladies," said Theta Pi president Veronica Moss, "and while I want you to know we all still love you like sisters... brothers... whatever... we'd prefer you not stay here for the rest of this week." Ashley, Kelly and Beth sat surrounded by their suddenly-judgmental sorority sisters, and as Ashley looked at herself and the other two, she could see where Veronica was coming from. She was now hairy and rough- looking, and after a few days of trying to mix and match her own wardrobe to look presentable, she had given in and was wearing Dimitri's clothes (most of them making her look like a gas station attendant) until they switched back. And she was the least problematic one. "There have been several incidents in the shower," said Veronica, and Ashley flashed back to two days earlier, when Melanie Cho had walked in on her as she was toweling off and passed out from the sight of Ashley's hairy chest and legs. "You scared poor Melanie half to death, Ash, and you, Beth -- all the girls say you've been staring at them." "Can I help it if I appreciate the female form?" shrugged Beth. "I'm admiring my sisters, that's all." "You were drooling, freak," snapped Shelly Palmer. "And as for you," Veronica said to Kelly, whose massive arms were folded smugly across her chest, "I don't care whose body you have, I don't care if it was consensual, sex with another sister against the wall of the common room in the middle of the day is not acceptable!" "You're just jealous I got with Angela instead of you," Kelly said as she stood up and put a hand on Veronica's cheek. "Don't worry. There's enough of me to go around, ladies." Veronica's face turned purple with rage and confusion. "Out! All of you! And you'll all have to undergo a disciplinary hearing before we'll even think of reinstating you!" Ashley and Beth stood up to follow Kelly out the door, Kelly miming "Call me" to several girls on her way. When they were gone, Veronica slumped on the couch and exhaled deeply. A comforting hand patted her back: Ron's. "There there, girlfriend. You had to do what you had to do," he cooed as his hands began to massage her shoulders. "We don't want this place turning into a freak show." "Thanks, Ronnie. I wish the bylaws would let you join. You're the best gay friend we've ever had." "I know," he said. "I know." PART TWELVE: COURTSIDE "Kelly and Angela Wilkes?" Tommy asked Chris. "I can't believe it." "Believe it," Chris said glumly. "When I told Kelly I wasn't ready for sex like this, I didn't realize I was giving her permission to sleep her way through Theta Pi." "Who would have thought she'd take to being an alpha male so easily?" said Claire. "I had an inkling, actually," said Chris. "You wouldn't have guessed it to look at her, but sometimes she would get into really kinky stuff in bed: tying me up, spanking me, that kind of dominatrix crap." "And you put up with that?" asked Tommy. "To get my hands on this body?" said Chris, who currently had that body concealed -- as he had since the humiliating trip to the gym -- in the baggiest sweatshirt and sweatpants he could find. "Abso-damn-lutely. There was one time she even suggested sticking her vibrator in me, but I drew the line there." "So she had interest in being the dominant one already," said Claire. "This must be like her ultimate role-playing fantasy come true." "Great," muttered Chris. They were seated in the bleachers, watching Gina play an outdoor scrimmage with the women's varsity team. Though all the women on the court were big, Gina was the biggest, fastest, strongest and most creative, and she was dominating both ends of the court with an array of dunks, steals, blocks and rebounds. "Damn," said Tommy, admiring the way Gina fought through a pick, stripped the ball from the opposing point guard and fired a cross-court pass to a teammate who banked the ball in. "Look at that move. How often did you see me do something like that?" "Dude, she's better than you ever were," said Chris. "You think?" asked Tommy. "You're not just saying that because she's playing against women with my strength and speed?" "No, he's right, Tommy," said Claire. "Sure, it's an advantage to have a man's body and game and go up against women, even really good women like this, but she's got an extra gear that I've never seen on you." "Yeah, like she wants it more," said Chris. "Huh," said Tommy. He thought about it. He had always been tall and strong and well-coordinated. Basketball came easily to him, and so he played basketball. But as he watched Gina carve up a defense with a shark-like grin plastered on her face, he realized that it had been a long time, if ever, since he had felt that driven, that happy on the court. "Some things you never really notice until you're on the outside looking in." "Maybe you'd be a killer gymnast," said Chris. "Not competitively," Tommy said. "Men's events are more about strength, and Gina's got most of that. I'm graceful, but I wouldn't be that great on something like the rings, and my privates would get in the way if I tried a woman's event like the uneven parallel bars." "Ouch," said Claire, picturing Tommy's pelvis crashing into those wood bars. "There are some definite advantages to what you got, though." "You know it," Tommy said, thinking of their amazing love life. He and Claire had been on the verge of breaking up out of boredom, and this change had revitalized everything about the relationship. "Chris," he added, "I hear Dimitri, Chuck and Beth are going to go in drag to some lesbian bar downtown tomorrow. I'm thinking it might be funny to go, too. Maybe you want to come? Do you some good to have an evening out, wouldn't it?" "They want to act like girls, that's their right," said Chris. "I'm just going to ride this one out low-key, okay?" Claire tried to think of something to say that wouldn't make Chris's discomfort even higher than it already was, but before she could, Gina ran over, drenched in sweat and ecstatic. "That rocked!" she said. "Coach Torella even said it was a shame this switch is temporary, because she'd give me a scholarship and a starting spot on the team in a heartbeat if I was going to stay this way." Tommy and Claire looked at each other for a second, then shook their heads and said, "Nah." "What?" Chris asked, but neither answered. "Hey, isn't that Valerie?" asked Gina, pointing across the quad. They all turned and saw Valerie wearing baggy cargo pants and a tight t- shirt that accentuated a bosom nobody had realized that she had. She was holding hands with a cute black girl Tommy recognized as her roommate Wanda, and as they continued to walk, Valerie started nibbling on Wanda's ear. "No way," said Tommy. "Chicks with dicks, man," lamented Chris. "This is what happens when you give dicks to chicks." He stood up and told them "I'm going to talk to Dr. Meyer." PART THIRTEEN: THE WOMAN IN THE MIRROR Dr. Meyer was in her office, taking notes into a digital voice recorder. "Both female subjects to receive male sex organs have reported multiple sexual encounters with other females. Both were heterosexual before, but neither seems troubled by the shift. Subject 114 in particular, the female half of the genital exchange, has made the most radical change in behavior, from a virginal female to a sexually voracious genetic male. Whereas their male partners both claim to have avoided any sort of male- female intercourse, and Subject 126, the male half of the full body swap, has been the least willing to embrace the study of any participant. Is there something in the female DNA that makes the women recipients more willing to experiment? Are they being driven more by their new sex organs than the men are? Is it a cultural bias? Something unique to their personalities? Note to self: for Phase Two of study, consider dramatically increasing number of swaps along these lines, if Neuman's equipment is available and capable of such." There was a knock at the door, and Chris poked his head through. "Can I talk to you, Dr. Meyer?" he asked. "Of course, Chris. My door's open to you at any time." Chris sat down and made an effort to spread his legs out, as if he still had male genitalia in need of space. "In fact," she added, "I was just thinking about you and your difficulty getting into the spirit of this experiment." "I already told you, doc, I'm not having sex with a dude, no matter what." "And I'm not saying that you have to," she assured him. "Or with a woman, or even to masturbate -- though I feel fairly confident that you would enjoy it." As he winced, she changed tactics. "Look at Dimitri and Ashley. Unless they're lying to me, they've been completely celibate so far this week, but they've been willing to walk in each other's shoes -- literally --in a way that you haven't." "I'm wearing Kelly's sneakers," he told her. "Probably the most masculine piece of clothing she owns, and you've paired them with those oversized potato sacks designed to hide any hint of your new feminine curves." "So, what, you want me to show a little skin?" "Yes, that's exactly what I'm saying. You need to really look at that skin, let other people look at it, to feel truly comfortable in it, and only when you do that can I get the data this project needs. Would you have a problem disrobing in front of me here?" "I'm sorry, what?" he asked. "Please. It's nothing I haven't seen before, either on my own body or at the time of your transfer with Dr. Neuman's machine. I really think this will help." Chris thought about it and reluctantly agreed. Anything to make him feel better about all this. He pulled off his sweatshirt, then the sports bra he had been using (traditional bra hooks gave him a problem, and his breasts were too big to go unsupported), then kicked off his shoes, his socks, his sweatpants and a pair of his boxer shorts he had tightened up with a safety pin. "Very good," said Dr. Meyer. "Now, please, go stand in front of that mirror on my closet door." Chris did as instructed, but he averted his eyes, as he had for most of the last few days when the possibility of seeing this body -- which he had examined so many times when Kelly was wearing it --came up. "Now, please, I want you to look at yourself. Really study this gift Kelly has given you." He took a deep breath and stared at himself full-on in the mirror. If he ignored what he could see from the neck up, it was really a spectacular sight, he had to admit. Perfect teardrop-shaped breasts, big but not too big (except the nipples, which were large and pink and perky), tan and slender arms, a taut stomach, an ass you could use as a bottle opener, a golden tuft of pubic hair concealing the vagina he knew so well, long and shapely legs, even the prettiest feet he had ever seen on a girl. God was not messing around when he built Kelly, Chris thought as he swiveled this way and that to get the full view. "So? How are you feeling now?" asked Dr. Meyer. "I've got the hottest bod on campus," he said, barely noticing that his manicured hands were working their way down below his waist. "See?" she told him. "So why don't you try to enjoy it for the time you have left in the project?" Chris continued to stare at himself, to the point where he didn't even mind the incongruity of his head on her body. Eventually, he turned to Dr. Meyer and nodded. "Tommy said some of the guys are going to take Chuck to a lesbian bar to pick up girls. Maybe I could get dressed up and go with them." "Excellent," said Dr. Meyer. "You don't have to try too hard, just so long as people can see some of what you have to offer." She waited for him to put his clothes back on, but he had returned to staring at himself in the mirror, and his hands kept creeping down below his waist. She decided to let nature take its course. "Chris, I just realized I have this big coffee craving I have to satisfy. Are you okay if I step out for a little while? That way you can take your time getting dressed." He barely even noticed her exit, she realized with a feeling of scientific pride. PART FOURTEEN: GUYS (OR WHATEVER) NIGHT OUT "Glad you could join us, Chris," said Dimitri as they walked towards the bar. "I figured I'd been staying inside long enough," Chris said. "If Kelly can score with women, maybe I can too." "That's the spirit, bro," said Chuck, as he teetered on the red pumps Claire had loaned him. They were an odd group: four men of varying degrees, all dressed convincingly like women, and a woman in body only who was wearing jeans, a Ramones t-shirt and canvas sneakers. By now, Dimitri was an old pro at dressing in drag. He was sporting one of Ashley's little black dresses and strappy sandals to show off the new black toenails he had given himself (fingernails matching, obviously). Tommy had to be creative to hide the male parts of his anatomy, but Gina had turned up a hoop skirt that flared out enough, which he paired with a red spangly top and flip-flops. Chuck had squeezed himself into the tightest pair of pants Claire had to offer ("So there's no confusion from the ladies about what I'm packing," he explained), along with a pink blouse augmented by a stuffed push-up bra. Chris needed no special padding, and he had chosen the flimsy white dress Kelly wore that year she was Marilyn Monroe for Halloween, along with open-toed white pumps that were higher than he had thought himself capable of walking in. "Man, you're almost as good in those things as Dimitri," Tommy noted. "I guess once I stopped fighting the change, the muscle memory kicked in," Chris figured. The new guys were all sporting make-up jobs courtesy of Dimitri and Ashley (who had participated only after everyone agreed to let her videotape the process and take pictures on her digital camera) and wigs courtesy of Valerie's "friend" in the theater department. No one had wanted to ask whether the "friend" was male or female, or the nature of their friendship, but all of them had been hearing rumors that Valerie was putting some of Chuck's old records to shame. "It's not fair that she's cool getting sucked off by gay guys," Chuck complained. "If I was willing to do that, I could be cumming all day, every day, you know?" Chris returned to his earlier "chicks with dicks" theory, still amazed at how much more aggressive both Valerie and Kelly were since the transformation. "But I'm worried about you, Dimitri," he said. "Why's that?" Dimitri asked, as he adjusted the diamond-studded choker Ashley had loaned him to complete the outfit. "Dr. Meyer said you haven't been getting any this week. Valerie and Ashley are nailing anything that moves, Tommy and Claire barely see daylight anymore, Ron, Beth and Chuck are all trying to play for the other team and I hear Gina went home from Murph's last night with some Sigma Nu guy who's into big girls. How come you're not putting yourself out there?" "Who says I'm not?" asked Dimitri as they entered the bar. "I've been hanging with Ashley a lot." "Dude, there's hanging and then there's hanging," said Beth. "Yeah, have you sealed the deal with her hairy self yet?" asked Chuck, who was scanning the place for a likely conquest. "She's been sleeping on your couch since they booted her out of Theta Pi, but I don't see any rug burn on you. " "It's not like that," said Dimitri. "So what's it like?" asked Chris. "I just like her, you know?" Dimitri explained. "Like, you wouldn't have thought it to look at her before we did our switcheroo, but she's really down to earth, she likes a lot of the same music I do, and she's starting to really own her new look. Like she's had a shaved head and a beard all her life, and if you want to say different, she might just mess you up." "Really?" said Beth. "That last part doesn't sound like the Ashley I know." "I thought you had Ron's memories," said Tommy. "It's jumbled. It's hard to explain," said Beth. "I know that I'm friends with Ashley and all those girls, but right now I don't feel like I have anything in common with them. On the other hand, I see a girl right over there I want to have a lot in common with. Excuse me, gents." Chuck watched Beth walk across the dance floor and quickly make a connection with a knock-out in a black leather miniskirt. "That's totally not fair," he whined. "You take a hot babe like Beth and you give her that nerd Ron's libido and interest in chicks, and she's gonna own us all at being a lesbian." "Maybe that's because she's a real woman," said Tommy, who was sipping on a strawberry daiquiri, the kind of fruity drink he would have been mocked for trying days ago. "Hey, I'm a real woman, too," insisted Chuck. "Sort of." "Then go out there and prove it," said Dimitri. "And remember, call yourself Charlie. It's more gender-neutral these days." Chuck gave them a salute and tottered on his heels towards the bar. "So how's it feel, Chris?" asked Tommy. "After what happened in Dr. Meyer's office, I feel like I've wasted half this week. Not anymore, though." Chris marched to the center of the dance floor, climbed up onto a platform and began writhing and gyrating like he was a Pussycat Doll. Dimitri and Tommy just stared, awe-struck, as did most of the bar's clientele. "He wasn't kidding about that muscle memory," said Tommy. "Are you as turned on as I am right now?" asked Dimitri. "More," said Tommy. "This is so wrong, isn't it?" "No, it's an experiment," said Dimitri. "And one I don't think Chris is regretting anymore." He started rifling through his purse. "Now where did I leave that camcorder the professor gave me?" PART FIFTEEN: GIRLS (OR WHATEVER) NIGHT OUT When Dimitri had told Ashley about the lesbian bar expedition, she decided that she and the girls (plus Ron) had to have their own outing. There was much discussion over whether to truly parallel the guys and go to a gay bar, but in the end Ron was the only one really pushing for it, as everyone else was fine just going to Murph's. As she and Ron walked out of the apartment, she realized this was the fastest she had ever gotten herself ready for a night on the town. No time slaving in front of a mirror, making sure every eyebrow hair was the right length and every blemish covered. She supposed if she had made the swap with any of the other guys, she might have needed to spend a few minutes drying and brushing their hair, but it would still be vastly quicker than her old routine, especially if she didn't care about seeming masculine. Ron, on the other hand, was practically living in front of the bathroom mirror, and it had taken the threat of Gina or Kelly coming up to forcibly evict him that finally got him moving. Ashley had dressed for the evening in some of Dimitri's Army surplus stuff, including camo pants, combat boots and an olive drab jacket. Ron wore a yellow silk shirt and tailored brown slacks. When they arrived at the corner, she saw that Kelly was again going out of her way to accentuate her muscles, in a white tank-top that seemed in danger of bursting to shreds if she flexed too much, tight jeans, and a baseball cap to hide her long hair. Gina's shirt was looser but still sleeveless to show off her big arms. Valerie remained a mix of masculine from the waist down with her cargo pants and hiking shoes, and feminine from the waist up in a tube top. She was a girl who was ready to go both ways, possibly at the same time. As they walked toward Murph's, Ron put his hand on Valerie's forearm and said, "So I heard a rumor that you had your way with the girl's softball team this afternoon." "Get out!" said Kelly. "That's not true at all," insisted Valerie. "It was just the second baseman... and I got the shortstop's number." "Gotta keep that middle infield in synch," said Gina. "What happened to the girl who fainted at the thought of doing anything with Chuck's penis?" asked Ashley. "She had a lot of orgasms and got okay with it in a hurry," said Valerie. "Amen, sister," said Kelly, who gave her a too-vigorous high five. "I just think it's cool that nobody's getting too bent out of shape when a cute girl like you turns out to be packing major male weaponry," said Gina. "Word spread quickly," said Valerie. "I'm a curiosity. Half the girls on campus want to try me out. Some of the guys, too." "And I'll take the other half of the girls," said Kelly. "Have you thought about sex with guys at all, Kelly?" asked Ashley. "You used to be the boy-craziest girl I knew." "I know, right?" she giggled, and it again sounded completely incongruous coming from that big strong body. "But I haven't even thought about guys since the change. Except for Chris. And he's not really a guy anymore, is he?" "Nope," Ashley acknowledged. "Check this out." She reached into a pocket of her Army jacket and pulled out some photos she had printed while Ron was still getting ready. "I took these of the boys before they went on their little fishing expedition." Kelly grabbed a shot of Chris in the Marilyn Monroe dress. "Oh my gosh, that is the sexiest thing I have ever seen. I want to do unspeakable things to this body." "That's your body," said Gina. "Not right now it's not," said Kelly.