Stars In My Eyes free porn video

Stars In My Eyes By Geneva On a space expedition Brett experiences a stellar phenomenon that changes him to a woman over some weeks. She slowly mentally adapts to the change. This story is set in the near future. No magic books are involved! START "Couldn't this be done with robots or remote sensors?" the director had asked at the first meeting. Bill Mitchell was staring at the cost estimates, unsuccessfully hiding his dismay. "It would save a lot of expense. I mean, to send two guys, just think of the weight! Couldn't we do it with something robotic or radio controlled, either of these. We've done things like that in the past. We have the expertise." Dr. Simonson, Mark, as he preferred, my immediate boss, was the guy who had originally proposed the expedition. He stood up, wiping his glasses for effect. "The trouble is, we don't know exactly what we will see but it is possible the effects might be so transitory that we may not be able to respond as fast as we should to catch all the details of the different possible events. We need somebody right there to anticipate or at least respond quickly to any changes, fine tune the detectors, switch the frequencies, whatever. Otherwise we might miss something. After all, we will be well beyond the orbit of Jupiter, and a radio signal from a craft in the right position would take about seventy minutes to get to Earth then that's seventy minutes to radio back. And that's not counting the time to decide what to look at! The theoreticians and astronomers can't be precise, but it is possible the effect could last less than a minute. "The stars are massive, but they are so far away that all we'd get could be a few seconds because of their relative movements." The discussion went back and forward for three hours but at the end the mission had been given approval and Roderigo and I were selected to take part in the mission/ experiment. I was an astronomer and he was an engineer and we both had extensive training on spacecraft. The mission was to study gravitational lensing. That is, when the light from a more distant star, on the the way to The observer, is bent by the gravity of a nearer star. But this case was going to be extra special, a kind of double whammy. My colleagues and I had calculated that yet another star would be lined up with the other two and there might be strange effects. The theoreticians were all agog and hopping up and down in their white coats or whatever they wear as they discussed what would happen. Given the immense distances it was a wonder that it would be detectable at all. I only hoped we had done our calculations properly. The whole organization I worked for was massive. It was a kind of hybrid setup, with scientists, engineers, but with strong military and business components. It was a wonder we could all work together as harmoniously as we did. I was pretty happy to be chosen as one of the crew. The expedition was a big enough deal. Advances in propulsion, spaceship design, navigation, electronics, the works, made a trip like this possible in a few weeks. Even a few years before this the trip would have taken years. I had seen an old sci-fi movie where the crew of a vessel going to Saturn were even put in suspended animation. Because of our speed we would age just a tiny bit less than on Earth because of relativity effects but I wasn't very concerned with that. If I didn't get old so fast as others that was a bonus. The vessel was comfortable enough too, maybe slightly cramped when all the electronics, spectroscopes and other optical staff and detectors and recorders were put on board. The vehicle would take off from the moon, and refuel at the depot on Mars' moon Phobos but the nice thing was, on the way back we'd let the Sun pull us and we'd only need to use the engines to steer when we were getting near home. If all went according to plan we would spend four weeks getting there and more or less the same on the way back. So, eight weeks in all. I could put up with that long easily enough and the data we obtained would keep my section busy for years. My buddy on the trip was going to be Roderigo Maldonado. I had worked with him before and liked his manner, meticulous when needed, easy going otherwise. We'd be able to work together and make good co-astronauts. This was all part of our screening and 'Rigorous', as a lot of his colleagues called him behind his back, and I would be okay provided he didn't start snoring or get bad breath or spout politics or religion. However, after a week I just called him Rigo. The start from the moon base was eventless and so was refueling but we had to divert a bit from the plane of the Solar System because of the asteroid belt and then our trajectory actually passed close to Jupiter. These large planets are always a thrilling sight in our telescopes but seeing it close up was an extra thrill. About a week later we started our manoeuvres to get into the right position, balancing the thrust of the motors with the various gravities so we would be in the best position to see the lensing effect. We were looking at a star in a galaxy five billion light years away that would distort the light of the stars behind it. The scientists had figured we would see the effect for just less than a minute. We had the right orientation and I had the multiple scopes and everything set up. I gave Rigo a high five on that morning. Well, we really had no real mornings but for convention we used a twenty for hour clock that was synchronized with HQ on Earth and helped communication with it. I guess we were slightly tense as the time approached, not that we really had much to do with the preliminaries. The equipment and the electronics and computers too care of all of that. Our job was to visually monitor the appearance of the stars with an optical telescope while keeping an eye on the infra-red and visible, ultra violet, radio and so on monitors. It got to an hour, then ten minutes a minute, ten seconds... five.... The first star had already been lensed but now the window began when the other star would come into play. I felt myself holding my breath. "Wow!" I cried. The lensing was clearly visible but then what I got was a sudden increase of the light followed by a spectacular burst of a pink glow. It hit my eyes and seemed to penetrate to my brain. I almost recoiled but I kept my eye stuck to the scope. Mesmerized, I kept looking then remembered to flick my eyes to the infrared detector and it was spiking too. Then, as the scientists had predicted, fifteen seconds later the pink glow tailed off. All that was visible was the simple lensing, and we could leave the automatic systems to do any further monitoring. I rubbed my eyes as the pale green after-image faded. "How about that? Spectacular! Did you see it, Rigo?" He was rubbing his eyes too. "Brett, my friend, that was the experience of a lifetime!" "Yeah, that pink! I've never seen anything like that." "Oh well. They'll have all sorts of spectroscopic analyses so they should be able to get a good idea what caused it." "So that's us done. Oh well, time to clear up and go home now. A bit of a let-down. We'd better start thinking about our press interviews and start practising the right expressions. You know, enthusiastic, rugged but charming." We had plenty of time to tidy up, four weeks. All the data we had taken were stored electronically but all had been transmitted too and we got a confirmation it had been received. We were halfway back again, skipping over the asteroid belt when I noticed I didn't have the same strength doing the exercises that I used as part of my daily fitness routine. I dIdn't seem to be able to pull the same amount. I measured myself the next day and it was even worse so I spent an extra ten minutes on the machine. I had grown a beard too on the mission. It had started beginning to look quite good too, but I was surprised one day that some beard hairs rubbed off when I was washing. I ran my fingers through the hair on my head. At least it was still very firmly anchored. Then my chest hair started to fall out too. It looked as if I maybe had some infection but I couldn't figure it out. By this time we had been isolated more than six weeks. That should have been enough for some bug or virus to show itself unless it was some special one that took a long time to manifest itself. I put it down to just one of those things then there was even more hair came off the next day. "Must be some effect of us being cooped up," I grumbled to Rigo. "What's that?" "I'm losing some of my beard hairs." "You too? I was shaving yesterday and it was as if some hairs had just pulled out." I explained more of the symptoms and he shrugged. "Yeah, I'm weaker too. Something for the medics to ponder, I guess." There was more the next day, actually worse. All of the hair on my chest fell off. That was followed by others, the hairs on my legs and arms. Comparing notes again, Rigo was having the same effects. We looked at each other. "Something helluva strange is going on!" I muttered. These were minor effects, but all had to be reported. Mission control had nothing to offer when we told them, other than to ask if we had eaten any food that might have spoiled and suggested we up the amount of vitamins we took. They told us to hook ourselves up to the health monitors, and after a few tests we waited nervously until three or hours later the results came back from Earth. All it said was that all the readings of our physiological functions looked as if they were fine and within the natural range. Somebody made some suggestions that it might be our speed, but that was shut down because in fact our speed was less than had been used by another crew, with no ill effects. We hadn't gone through the same acceleration either. Another was that radiation might be leaking from the motors but we ran all the tests and the shielding was in place and effective. They asked us if it could be a burst of cosmic rays but when we checked the monitors and the data stored there were no surprises. All were well within the usual range. So the real answer was, nobody had a clue and we'd have to wait till we get back to Earth for more thorough tests. Then there was something else. We both noticed we had started to lose weight and we started feeling dull aches from our joints, our hips and shoulders especially. Then my voice began to squeak. Same with Rigo. I had a fairly prominent adamsapple and that seemed to be shrinking away too. By this time we were only two weeks from touching down at moon base and I was looking forward to getting thorough tests because my whole body was now changing noticeably. My clothes had been fairly loose, like most astronauts. If you are in a confined set-up like a spaceship you don't want confining clothes but now they were even looser on my chest or middle. But they were actually snugger at my hips and at my ass. These even felt different, plumper and softer and they actually appeared to have grown. Rigo was going through the same changes too. The next day he stood or I should say he floated before me. To my surprise he pulled off his shirt. "Brent, look at my chest. What do you see?" My mouth dropped a bit. It looked like his chest had changed shape. His shoulders looked narrower. His pecs had been the usual male shape but now they were fuller, getting to be more of a conical shape, more prominent. The areolas were larger and the nipples more prominent too. I remembered the last few mornings my own chest had felt tender when I put on my shirt. A wave of heat, embarrassed heat, washed over me . I was blushing and I pulled off my own shirt. He gasped at me. "You're the same as me. It looks like we got tits growing!" "Oh shit!" We pulled off all our clothes. Once we saw it, it was obvious. Our bodies had changed shape to about half between male and female. The overall shape and proportions had changed, but noticeably, we both had budding breasts. We gaped at each other, then as one we bent down to have a look between our legs. At least everything was still there but my penis had shrunk, and I remembered I hadn't had a morning erection in about two weeks. I held my face and yelled out. It was worse when I found the last of my beard has just fallen out and was covering my hands. Rigo was gasping, crying out too. I gasped at the sudden awareness of what was happening. I guess I had seen the changes, but maybe they hadn't really registered, or perhaps I had I unconsciously suppressed them. But here was the evidence, two guys turning partly into girls. "What's going on?" Rigo asked. "It's obviously affected both of us whatever it is. At least we've still got cocks and balls." "Yeah?" I shook my head. I yanked at my penis. "For how long do you think? Mine's shrunk." Rigo put a slim hand under his balls and cock and lifted them to examine them. "They've all shrunk!" "What the hell's happening to us.? I'm a scientist. You're an engineer. We're both trained as astronauts. There must be some logical reason." "Logical reason or not. I want it to stop and get fixed!" Mission control had no advice either. After the first hilarity they decided we were serious and told us to hook ourselves up to all the on- board medical monitors to record the symptoms. They had no other advice. We were two scared people who finally landed at the moon a week later. Of course we had the customary checkup but it was totally overshadowed by the incredible changes that had taken place on us and... were still going on. "This is fascinating! It must be unique! What a great chance to do some research," said one of the medics. I had to resist slugging him. I am not sure how much damage I would have done him either. My fists had shrunk and the muscle tone in my arms was going too. My legs were long and slim but my feet had dropped several sizes. There was a lot of debate about us. If we had some disease, we could be better isolated on the moon, but the total medical facilities and diagnostics were better at HQ on Earth so the decision was to transfer us there, all wrapped up in sterile container. I wondered what was happening to me. I had tried several times to stimulate erections but they failed miserably and my penis had shrunk further too. So when we finally got back to Earth they hustled us into a hospital and gave us virtually every medical test known and every type of medical imaging, blood tests, urine tests, DNA analysis, CAT, ECG, EEG, even a mammography. Meanwhile,m the changes were continuing. My penis had become virtually non existent. It had shrunk to only a small lump now, still as sensitive but essentially gone. My balls had disappeared, retracted to somewhere in my body and the scrotum had rearranged, and then split. The next day it had rearranged further into some folds and, worst of all, I had developed an extra opening between them. My body was more and more like that of a woman, my hands and feet had shrunk too. My hips had changed so there was a gap between the tops of my thighs where my new female parts were nestled. My neck had lengthened while my Adamsapple had gone and I was speaking higher. I didn't dare try to sing in my usual bass voice in case I would have come out as a tenor if not a contra tenor. I only hoped I would not become a soprano. Then they called Rigo and I in for more DNA analysis and... Dr. Mitchell looked at us over the top of his glasses as we were ushered in. Several of my astronomer colleagues were there but along with them were a whole bunch of medical specialists and I felt my stomach shrink. The eager expression on their faces was as if they were viewing a special rhesus monkey, or was it a lab rat or a drosophila? "Mr. Doering, Mr. Maldonado, we have examined you both thoroughly and as a result of these we find we have a great numbers of issues to discuss and work out possible courses of action." No kidding! "Brett, Roderigo, if I can call you that, as you are terribly aware, your bodies are changing. I will go over these issues first. I won't go into each medical test in detail but let me just say just say that you both appear to be completely healthy. There are no viruses or bacteria that have have shown. All of your physiological functions appear to be normal except, for the obvious changes in your bodies. "You see, you are both now essentially women. You have essentially changed sex. You have lost all the primary sex characteristics of men, and instead obtained those of women. That is true externally but internally as well. All of our medical imaging tests tell us that you now possess the internal organs of women, vagina, uterus, Fallopian tubes and ovaries. "But, it is the DNA results that are concerning, or I should say astounding. To explain briefly, I don't have to tell you that men have a chromosome that is popularly described as XY. Women are XX. For some reason, you have both become XX, like women. The Y parts of both your chromosomes have gone and we think the remaining X part has doubled up. That was found in as many samples of DNA we took so we must assume this is the same for every cell in your bodies. "That still puzzles us, although these effects complement the changes in your anatomy and physiology. In the time you have been here these effects that modified your bodies have continued. So, having the extra X chromosome has rewritten what your genes did, affecting your physiology. Your total physiology is changing. As well as the primary characteristics, you now have the hair patterns of women. You have women's figures. Your limbs, feet and hands have women's sizes your faces have remodelled too." He made a face. "And unfortunately we see no way of reversing this. That leads us to another question. What to do next? What do you want to do?" This was overwhelming. It was as if the roof had fallen in. I could hardly take it in. Rigo's face was stricken and his eyes stared. "Crudely, you have two choices. We could remove some of the more obvious effects by surgery. I mean we could remove your breasts and ovaries and other internal organs. Perhaps some sort of penis and testicular sac could be made from your body tissue or grafted from a donor. And with steroid treatment that would make it more possible for you to live like a man, except, you would be sterile. "The other possibility is that, as you might say, you go with the flow. So you would let your body develop all the way so that you are a complete woman. And live as a woman. Our own tests show that you are producing hormones in the correct ratios for most women. You are almost completely there now. "These hormones will probably have their effect on you too, both in your female rhythms, but the psychologists tell me that you'll develop the effects too in your feelings and emotions, how you behave. If the changes do not complete naturally, perhaps a synthetic hormone regime would be effective would complete the process. We could give you all psychological and psychiatric help as necessary. "As you are now anatomically almost totally female is possible at some point you will start to menstruate. It could be that you will get female behaviour and start to be attracted to men naturally." I just about dropped in shock. Then I realized I was crying. Talk about female emotions and behaviour! He had just announced my life and that of Rigo were irrevocably changed. I was stunned. He continued. "Brent, Roderigo, I am sorry about this. We had no idea this would happen and there is no way we know of to reverse what has happened to you. I realize that this is a terrible decision that you face. We have assembled a medical team and a counselling team too, and some of them have a lot of experience in transgender counselling. I advise you to discuss your futures with them thoroughly before you make any decisions. You will of course, be entitled to compensation and medical care. "But there is another very important facet. We need to find out exactly how this was caused, so we can make sure that it never happens again. We have a committee of astronomers, physiologists and psychologists assembled as well." He gestured to those seated. "We want to know what might have caused the phenomenon. Almost certainly the changes you are experiencing arose from the experiment you were engaged on. So, we need to know what happened, then why it affected you, yes, and how it affected you." I did not like the gleams in the eyes of his cohorts. "However, I am sure you are both tired and need some time to think about this. You need to rest, but we need answers too, as soon as possible." We were dismissed. Rigo and I staggered out. We had been given medical leave until they were sure the changes were done. We had been assigned semiprivate quarters, but we were not ready to go there yet. Instead, we staggered to the bar, trying to keep our female hips from swaying to much and each of us ordered a large drink, Scotch for me , tequila for him. "What the hell do we do?" Rigo asked. "We have to sit on it. They tell us the changes are almost complete." I wriggled my chest. "I don't like it, but my chest keeps moving around on me. I need to support it. That means I'll have to get a bra, you too." "That's for girls!" "Yeah, and what are we? We look and walk and talk like girls." I wriggled in my clothes again. My pants were uncomfortably loose at my waist. "Look at our clothes. "They're all the wrong proportions now. We must have looked sloppy in front of that committee." "How our clothes look is the least of our problems," he yelled. We must have taken quite a few drinks as I do not remember getting back to our quarters. I suppose some Samaritan must have been on the ball and taken pity on us. We were having breakfast the next morning in the canteen, still in our ill fitting clothes, when an attractive smartly dressed woman suddenly presented herself before us. "Mr. Maldonado, Mr. Doering, I'm Jess Lloyd. Dr. Mitchell called me. I gather you have a serious problem. But first, and I can see I'm needed, there is another." She looked us up and down. "You both need new clothes and maybe advice on them." "Actually I don't know what to think about this but I'm one of the science advisors, a psychologist. Dr. Mitchell must have noticed how I dressed. He asked me to get help you get new clothes. I suppose I should be flattered that I was given the job." It she did not sound exactly thrilled. "Please don't be offended but I think you will now have problems getting clothing if you use men's clothing or sizing." She eyed us firmly. "You will need women's styles. Given your uh.. male history, I imagine you'd be happier in pants outfits. You wouldn't want skirts and dresses, although you are welcome to try these if you want. No, I see you don't." She gave a faint smile at our stricken faces. "All right, if you want, I can take you shopping to get outfitted. I mean with proper fitting women's pants, and tops, and shoes. So, when you are ready? Would today be fine. I mean, if you want to do it, I mean." I looked at a Rigo and he shrugged. "I suppose we have to do it sometime." In a half hour we were standing outside a department store. "Are you ready then?" Jess asked. "You look as if you were heading to the gallows." "I suppose I'm ready," I grunted and Rigo rolled his eyes. "Me too." "Then here we go. Oh, I should tell you, first we have to get you some proper women's underwear." "Wait a minute," I protested. "I didn't agree to that!" "I'm sorry! I didn't ask you specifically, but do you want to look proper, not like a street person in too-big clothes that someone had put in a charity bin.?" "Well, no, I mean I want to look proper." "All right, and tell me, how do you like your shirt rubbing against your nipples?" "I don't like it. I'm aware of it all the time and it gives me strange feelings." A smile played round her lips. "Yes, there is that, but do you feel sore?" "Yes, it's irritating the nipples." "Then that's why you need a bra, it protects your nipples from rubbing on rough clothes. And it also supports and controls your breasts, them, you, so they don't swing about. I bet you'll find a bra a bit confining too at first, but you'll just have to put up with it." The situation was bizarre. Jill was discussing our need for a distinctive intimate female garment in front of us without any embarrassment, at least on her part. Rigo and I were red faced. It was as if she saw us as women, not as men. She nodded to the lingerie department. "So, that's where we're heading first. Get you all properly bra'd. And you and Roderigo need to get measured too so the fit is correct. I'm a psychologist, not a lingerie expert. So we need to get a professional do it." She ignored our looks of dismay and In a few minutes she had commandeered an assistant and we had been shepherded into a fitting room, and stripped to the waist. By this time we had developed as far as we would get. I couldn't help comparing my breasts with Rigo's. He, she was fuller than me and her nipples were brownish to my dark pink. The efficient looking assistant had been mildly surprised when Jess told her what we wanted. It must have been unusual for her to see two confused bra-less women getting fitted together, and clearly under the supervision of another woman but she made no comment. The fitting seemed to take an inordinate amount of time as she tried on several styles until she and Jess were satisfied. Rigo and I were given virtually no say, not that we would have been able to contribute much either. All the bras we tried felt strange and confining but we ended up three each and left wearing one each. I felt held and firm but the sensation was better than the disconcerting feeling of breasts moving on my chest. "I got you very plain, functional ones. I don't imagine you're ready for lace and underwires yet. Next thing, let's get panties for you." "No need. I can wear my shorts," I complained. "No you can't! I suppose you'll want to get women's pants rather than skirts but even relaxed fit pants are tighter over your butt than men's so you need your underwear to be smoother." There was a faint smile on her face. "And you don't need a front opening on them either. I gather you don't have the anatomy for that now. Sorry, that is cruel of me! This is difficult for me. I imagine it is much worse for you." "Don't worry about stripping to fit panties. You don't need to try them on in the store. You both look like a medium size and plain cotton panties will do for a start until you get used to them. Then you may want to try fancier satin styled ones. "You'll need nightwear too. I suggest you go for simple styles like long T-shirts. They'll be comfortable and practical." Pants were next and as she said, she inspected us while we selected some women's pants. They weren't too bad, other than being lighter material and some of the pairs had the zippers on the wrong sides. At first sight the rear parts looked too big but they actually fitted well. She steered us to another department. By this time we were loaded with parcels and we took them to the car first. "You'll need blouses or women's shirts too." These were a bit tighter too, except for the unfamiliar tapering cut to accommodate a bust over the slim waist. "You want them loose enough but too much, nor too tight either. You don't want the buttons strained." She pointed us to racks of other stuff. "You'll need some other tops too, light sweaters and stuff." These were not too bad either, brighter colours and a lot of styles but I opted for one in gray, another black and a dark blue. "You're not one for bright colours, I see. I suppose these are okay but you may want some more colour in your future. "Now I guess at this stage you'll be happy with socks. As you get used to your new bodies you may want to try skirts or dresses and then maybe you'll want to use tights or pantyhose or stockings but you're fine now." Getting some outerwear was next next. I opted for a casual zippered jacket and a trench coat. Rigo much the same. In the shoe department we got our sizes taken. I was shocked by how much my feet has shrunk. I chose a flat heeled lace up pair but Jess persuaded me to get a slip-on pair with a slight heel. "I hate to keep bringing it up but you are both stuck, so the sooner you get use to women's styles the better. You're young women so you should use younger women's styles. You should get heeled shoes at some time." It had taken several hours and It had been a traumatic experience for Rigo and I , but Jess had shown a lot of patience. "Thanks very much, Jess," I said. "That's all right. I'm glad to help. Now get these women's clothes on you. And get used to wearing them. You might as well dump all your old male stuff." She gestured to our purchases. "The best I can say of these clothes is that they're functional but at least they will look much better on you at your next sessions with the various committees and investigators than your former clothes did." "But!" She put her hands on her hips and glared at us. "You look like two of the dowdiest old maids I have ever seen! But it's what you wanted. "Look, there's a bar there. Come on in and we'll get a drink. I'm going to put on my other hat now. I'm intrigued by your case. I'm a psychologist, as I said, so I'd like to understand your own minds and your futures now. I can probably offer the best advice of anyone." We had got ourselves seared in a secluded booth. Jess had a cocktail while Rico and I ordered beers. I sipped at it but it didn't taste as good as I thought it would. Jess looked at us. "Um, so, what do you see for yourselves? You've got women's bodies, but you still carry yourselves like guys. Have you decided to accept these bodies or take surgery I know it's early yet, but, are you thinking about your alternatives?" I ran my hands down my body. "All this feels strange. But getting things cut off and maybe with some replumbing, doesn't appeal to me either," "Nor me," said Roderigo. "But, the alternative?" "All right, your futures, if you decide to stay as women, we don't know what will happen at all. The tests tell us you've got female hormones soaking through you so maybe your new bodies will start to feel natural to you and you may start to feel as a woman and act that way too, you know, adopting female mannerisms and behaviour . And then you may start to take more interest in the things women do and that's a helluva lot and different from men. "Take shopping for clothes for instance, as we've just done. Some women love that. I can think of few guys who do. Men are interested in tools, cars and mechanical things, women not so much. Same with sports. "Women are more interested in household things, everything that goes into making homes. One of the big things is babies and children and health, as you might imagine." "What is it like being a a woman?" I asked. Jess laughed. "That's actually a kinda dumb question, if you'll excuse me. I should ask you what it's like being a man. Could you answer that? Anyhow, I was born female. I grew up a girl. I did girl things with other girls, I had crushes, I dated, I married a man. Now I'm a mother with two kids that I love. I always accepted being one and actually never thought much about it. Maybe my destiny as a woman was marked out in my genes. "Maybe I can tell you the things I don't like and those I do. I don't like having monthly periods. I don't like that I have a weaker body and I have to watch in case I find myself in a vulnerable position. I like having looks that can attract men, but I'm always aware that that I could attract the wrong sort of man. "There's work too. I have to put up with assholes. Worse, they're sexist male assholes. They tell me things have improved professionally but I think men still have the advantage. For instance, here I am acting as a fashion advisor for you two. That is taking time from my professional work. They could have hired some store's fashion coordinator instead and a lot cheaper." "Sorry, Jess!" "No, I should be sorry I said that. I didn't think. But actually, There are pluses too. So I should be glad to do it. I may be able to incorporate this into my professional work. We're all sworn to secrecy, but your's is a unique case and I'm privileged to be in on it. I'll be super interested to see how you both develop and what paths you take in the future. "What are the good things about being a woman? Dressing up, having close female friends, having a body that is attractive to men and to women too. "I think women feel life more intensely. Although I guess that could be a disadvantage. It's a joy to feel you can produce and nurture children, but I must say the last months of pregnancy didn't appeal to me. "Maybe you want to make a list of the things you liked and disliked about being a man. Then see what your opinion is some months on. However, for the present, let's only stick with help and advice with clothes and behaviour. Yeah, definitely with clothes! You may even want to try makeup." She stood up and straightened her clothes. "I've said enough. I gotta go now. But just call me and I'll be glad to help." "Thanks, Jess." We relaxed as much as we could and in a few days, dressed in our new clothes, we presented ourselves at the medical section of the facility. It took two weeks to get all their tests repeated then we were left alone for another week before the next investigation. With our new clothes on, we went in to a session with Bill Mitchell. "I see Dr. Lloyd has been helping you. All right, we'll get started. What we need to find out is what exactly caused your changed condition. You need to go over absolutely everything, no matter how trivial. We have the data from all monitors and we've already had you tell about it but let's do this absolutely thoroughly. See if there is some anomaly." So Rico and I, individually and together, went over everything we had done and experienced on the expedition. Every word and action was recorded then we went through the whole voyage and the observations again and again. The only thing that seemed unusual was the pink flash of light. A week later Dr. Mitchell called us in. "We are floundering here. The only thing that appears to be non routine is the actual lensing study. Even that-" He held out his hands. "We've studied galaxies and every type of variable star there is. The only thing is that light, and you described it as pink. We don't know what stellar phenomenon caused it. That's intriguing enough, but as to it's effects, they're incredible. Catastrophic to you two. We've been speaking to a lot of psychologists and medics and we've come up with a plausible scenario. No, I should say hare- brained, we haven't a clue. "But here is what one of the teams thinks the course of events is. As you know, your job was to measure and study the lensing effect of one star on the light of another. We are a helluva long way from the nearest one, probably five hundred light years. Then there's more than another hundred to the other and the furthest star is about a thousand light years away. Stars are big things, but with the vast distances they were supposed to be lined up for only the fifteen seconds. "We think what happened was the furthest away one went nova, so there was a sudden burst of light and the two nearer stars lensed and in some way modified the radiation that you saw. Then that radiation hit your eyes. Both of you were looking at it so you were both affected. "We know light affects some of the glands in the human body and then some glands further control the action of others so possibly, just possibly, and it's a big stretch, some process started that modified your hormones and chromosomes and set in motion a process to destroy all your Y chromosomes it but also doubled up the X. The Y chromosome is pretty small compared to others so maybe it was more sensitive to the effects started by that light. The geneticists don't like that, but... He grimaced. "If it wasn't that, far fetched as it is, we don't have fucking clue, excuse my French. We are also still trying to figure out though, why your body has reformed. Hormones can remodel the body to some extent, but the endocrinologists say they have never seen it as much as this. In your case bones as well as soft tissues have been affected. Organs are remodelled. I think you've both dropped a couple of inches too. So your whole bodies have been reshaped. "They really want to have you take a whole new bunch of other tests and try some types of treatment." That was depressing. I shook my head. "I know we're scientists of a sort, and maybe we should be interested in finding out what happened but sorry. Much as we'd like to know what's going on we don't fancy being guinea pigs, or more like lab specimens. I've had enough of being prodded and poked and jabbed for the time being." "Me too!" said Rigo. "I understand but I really wish you would, so we can find out. And the army brass are wondering if there could be some military potential. An experiment is being set up with to study the effect of that pink light on mice and a bunch of other animals. They were able generate the same wavelengths by other means." "The answer is still, No!" He sighed. "Then we're about done. Now we have to decide how to go with you two?" He raised his eyebrows and I took that as a question. "Dr. Mitchell, you know we were or we were, pretty regular guys. We liked girls and we wanted sometime to get married and have kids. Now that's all gone. We're now faced with totally replanning our lives, changing our fundamental attitudes. We'll have to rebuild our lives from the most basic level." "I'm sympathetic and I can't tell you how sorry I am. All the administration feel that way. Personally, I am devastated so maybe I have a slight idea how you feel. We'd try and fix it if we could, but there's no way, because we don't know how! All we can do is to make your future lives as rewarding as possible." "That sounds like a doctor telling someone they have a terminal disease!" "Yes, a terminal disease of womanhood!" Rigo spat out. Bill went red-faced. "Look, ...guys, I want you both to take some weeks off. Get away from here. Go someplace where you can think of what you want to do." That seemed like a plan and I discussed it with Rigo that night over a bottle of wine. I just didn't fancy a beer. "You know, these effects have been going on almost four months now. And it looks like they've maybe reached their limit. To all intents and purpose we are completely women." He gave a hard laugh. "Intents and purposes? It was none of these. We certainly didn't intend these crap things that have happened to us. Neither did anyone." "I want to get away from this for a bit." I waved my arm around our accommodation and the whole base. "There's just so much stress. I need to go somewhere and try to get my head straight again. Away from people. I feel that I'm in a goldfish bowl. "I suppose there are a few mountaintops you could go and sit on. Look up gurus on the web and see who is recommended!" "It's too cold on mountaintops. Maybe I'll try some tropic island instead. Trouble is, there are too many tourists on a lot of them. Do you want to come?" "No, I pass. I'll stick around here. I don't want to show my face around anything unfamiliar in case of problems. Maybe I'll see some medics here and talk about surgery." I winced. "You sure?" "Not at all, but I gotta get enough information." "Well, I wish you luck, I want away from all this." But I actually ended up in a spot in Hawaii. The Director pulled enough strings and I got a new, and false, but complete documentation. I had selected a new first name, Brianna , and I would use Bree for short. I had a drivers license, and passport with the same name. They even gave me a credit card loaded with money for a holiday. I chose a small resort on Maui near a small beach on the North coast of the island. The resort had a central office centre with a number of units directly attached to that. Then, in addition, I suppose to give an 'authentic' Hawaiian experience, there were a number of different sized cabanas. I had chose one of these hoping I might get more privacy. For cooking facilities I had a kitchen spot with a microwave, a fridge and a stove top. Most of the other units were occupied and saw different groups come and go, but I preferred not to interact with them too much, still trying to get my mind in order. The resort was out of the way of the major tourist stream but it was near enough to a small town with a grocery store. It had all the electronic communications that I could use to read or check up on news if I wanted, but I just wanted to relax and let ideas about my future life drift in and out of my mind. That worked for a week but I was still undecided. I slept a lot too but I began to get bored. I missed the company of Rigo or any other human being. We had been buddies for months and shared experiences and the trauma. One day, about a week after I arrived, I heard excited laughing, and I saw a small party of girls had arrived at the next cabana. It looked like they were there on their own as I did not see any men. In fact it looked like an extended girls night out. They had hardly been there a hour when I saw them, all bikini-clad, running into the ocean and the next few days and evenings too were filled with the noises of them running around, swimming, playing in the surf, sunbathing, and playing games, laughing and giggling. I actually didn't mind that. In a way it was company for me and they did not carry on too long at nights so I could get to sleep. They were mixed racially, two black girls, two white and one who could have been Asian. They were often splashing and playing on the sand and in the ocean but I didn't mind at all. It was good to see them all having a good time and I looked down at myself, dressed in shorts and a man's shirt, just lying in the shade and obscuring myself, out of human contact. Getting a bit bored, I wondered if I should get out a bit. I started taking strolls along the small beach between the two headlands. The lava rocks were well eroded and I liked looking at the wild life in the pools. When I looked down into the ocean water I could see at least five types of fish so I thought it would be an idea to go snorkelling. I'd be able to rent the equipment at the resort shop. I had chosen the snorkel, mask and flippers when I realized I did not have a swim suit. That would mean choosing one and trying it on and taking my courage in my hands I went to a store in the small town. I was faced with the enormous variety of styles and patterns that I was totally confused but it had to be done. I was still self-conscious about my female body so I tried on a one- piece maillot style, self consciously removing my clothes and stepping into it in the changing room and pulling it up past my ass and then manoeuvring my breasts into the cups. At least it covered everything between my bust and hips. I suppose it was a standard one piece suit but it emphasized my female curves. I would have preferred something more shapeless and covered but there was nothing else for it if I wanted to go into the water. I was terribly nervous when I finally shuffled across the beach and into the water, but once I was in the water I felt a great sense of accomplishment and I had a great time snorkelling along beside the rocks. But then I had to face coming out and I got the feeling that all the girls were looking at me. I kept wondering if they would recognize I was only pretending to be a girl. The next day I had intended to do some more snorkelling, but the girls were out playing a sort of volleyball on the beach and I did not have the nerve to go past them. I decided instead to get just a little sun on my chaise longue. I was concentrating on looking up news on the internet when I was interrupted. "Whatcha just sittin there for, girl? You trying to avoid people? You look a bit lonesome there!" I looked up with a start and saw a girl looking down at me. Her skin was a lovely cafe-au-lait colour and I recognized her as one of the girls next door. She had a shock of dark curly hair. "Hi! I'm sorry. No, I thought I'd check up on some stuff before I went snorkelling." "You're on a holiday! You want to shut off all the outside. Oh, I'm Cindy." "Nice to meet you. I'm Bree." "Then what you lying there for?" she scolded. "Come on girl, join the world! I feel sorry for you. You can't lie there wasting away!" She actually took hold of my only slightly resisting hand and pulled me up. She looked me over critically. "Bree, you got a nice body and you go and hide it in that old woman's swimsuit. What you want to do that for?" She must have seen me blushing but she did not wait for a reply. "That suit all you got? I'm going to take you shopping. Get something that's better for your age and your body. By the way, how old are you? "I'm twenty nine," I admitted. She looked friendly but she had put me on the defensive. Her eyebrows went up. "Well, you sure don't look it. You look only about nineteen! I see you don't have a ring. How come you ain't married? A good lookin' woman like you." "Well I...." Her hand went to her mouth. "Oh, sorry Bree, I shouldn't a asked. Me and my big rude mouth. Anyway, you need to come over and meet my friends. You just can't lay there on your ownsome." The girls were genuinely friendly and if any of them saw me or my bathing suit as relics they did not show it. The other black girl was LeeAnne, the Asian girl was Mandy, and the two white girls were Emma and Melody. They were all from Minneapolis. Cindy was a receptionist, LeeAnne a teacher's assistant. Mandy was a hostess at a Japanese restaurant, Emma was a real estate agent and Melody was a beautician. When they asked what I did, I said I worked in the Astronomy Department of a university as a receptionist. I was deliberately downplaying my own education. In a day I was hanging around with the girls, chatting, drinking, playing in the surf or on the beach, cooking, grooming each other, talking about clothes, and pop idols. I must admit my knowledge of these was lacking. I was being pulled into the orbit of these girls, but I was not really resisting. I needed the company and the distraction. The more I was with them, the less I thought about my dilemma and my future. A lot of their continual chatter was casual and trivial, but I did not need anything deeper. A couple of days later Cindy announced she was indeed taking me shopping . Two other girls, Emma and Mandy demanded to go along too so I endured, in an amused way, their flurry of comments in the change room in a swim store as I tried on garment after garment. This time I ended up with a bikini outfit, not a brief postage stamp size like some of the girls wore , but definitely a bikini. Now I was showing a fair amount of bare female skin but all the other girls wore skimpy bikinis constantly, occasionally with loose cover - ups. It soon got that I didn't even think about it their swelling breasts and butts. Now when I looked down and saw breasts on my chest and my own waist flaring out to wide hips and butt I was pleased. My figure compared well to those of the girls. We all ate together. Like me they did their own supper so we pooled our supplies and wine. Then one night, after dinner, the conversation got onto intimate talking about past or current boyfriends or love interests. Of course too they wondered about my current situation. "You twenty nine, you said. You must've have had a man in your life?" Cindy asked. I had to lie to them again. I knew they were expecting me to talk. Then what could I say? I had to make up some stories, from what I knew of my own exploits with girls, my male friends' exploits and a little bit of careful fiction, all with a transgender switch. "Just waiting for Mr. Right," I said, or words to that effect. It did not go further than that. I was a female virgin of course, but I couldn't tell them that. Their last night the girls decided to go into town, to do some clubbing and dancing. I watched as they slipped into skimpy bras and panties, made themselves up, fixed elaborate hairstyles then shimmied into short tight glittery dresses,m none of them with hemlines longer than mid thigh. By this time I was totally used to naked female flesh. "Ain't you coming too?" asked Cindy but I shook my head. "Not ready yet." "You missing out on a lot, girl, but I'll let you be!" They left me wondering what my future life held. I saw them one more day, then they were all heading back to the winter chill of Minneapolis and I kissed them all goodbye. "You're a strange one, Bree," said Cindy. "There's something you're hidin'. I hope you find your way." I was sad to see them go. I had enjoyed their company, and their fun and good spirits had been immensely good for me. They has shown me there could be another life waiting for me if I was willing to put out the effort and adapt myself. The main change was that I was now in a state of mind where I was willing to explore it. Maybe at some point I would get to where I was happy and confident enough to accept it. When I got back home, the first thing I did, apart from restocking groceries, was to take a look at my wardrobe. Some wasn't that old but I was now horrified to see how dowdy, plain and shapeless most of the garments were, especially the old ones. I looked at my male clothing too. I now knew I would never wear them again so I took several loads to a charity store as a major clean out. That done, the next thing was to go shopping in one of the big stores, followed by some boutiques. I guessed I would still want to wear pants but this time I looked for a far better cut and I was happy with the results when I was done. I thought they flattered my tidy rear and waist. I was less confident about getting other clothes so with a little hesitation I called up Jess again. She actually was delighted to hear from me and we made a date for her to help me. She came over to my apartment first. "All right, Bree. Oh, I like the name. You got some new clothes already. Let's see what you've got." I showed her my purchases. She was complimentary, but not as much as I would have liked. "You don't like these," I said. "No, they are fine. For work in fact, they'll be appropriate, but they're still not what you could be wearing for dressy casual wear, not to mention when you really want to go out on the town and show off your assets. You're an attractive woman. Don't be afraid to be a stylish well-dressed one too. So I'm glad you called me." So, it was time to go looking for some more stylish tops and in fancier styles and better fabrics that flattered my bust line. We went lingerie shopping too and I got some lacier bras and panties. I even bought a smart skirted suit and pantyhose and some stylish black shoes with three inch heels. Finally, with a bit of cajoling, she shepherded me into a salon and had my hair styled, got my ears pierced and she helped me choose some small studs. "Better wait until your tastes had developed enough before you get more elaborate ones." "I can't thank you enough, Jess." "Glad to help but, another thing, Bree, I want you to think about wearing some makeup. And a little more than just a dab of lipstick. I'll show you the basics. After that it's up to you to practise. You probably won't use much makeup for your usual work, but for going out on dates, or even with other girls, you'll need to learn. You might even think about going to a salon and getting it done." My stomach gave a little jolt when she mentioned dates. Did she mean with a man? Could that be in my future? "I see the afternoons's getting on. How are you getting home? Can I take you?" "No." She looked at her watch. "I asked my brother to collect me, a couple or so minutes from now." "I'll come down with you." We had been waiting only two minutes when a car drove up. "Here's my ride. Now Bree, call me again if you need me." She gestured to the driver and he rolled down the car window. "Bree, this is my brother Kyle." "Hi, glad to meet you." He stuck his hand out the car window. I saw his eyes look me up and down approvingly then he gave me a faint smile. Back upstairs again I looked at my face in the mirror. I had never worn makeup until I had been with the girls in Hawaii. They had made themselves up for going out on the town and had made me up too, even though I wasn't going to accompany them. I studied my face. It was totally and unmistakably female. My eyes were not as deep set, my cheekbones were higher, my lips fuller, my chin a bit more delicate. My male identity and looks were gone. Jess had suggested I go to a salon, but instead I decided to go to a store where I approached a bored looking girl in a white smock standing at the cosmetics counter and asked what she recommended for me. I think she was pleased with the challenge and she actually offered to make me up and self consciously I sat on a stool while she did her tricks on my face and around my eyes. I was amazed at the end result. My appearance was like a model and I was pleased I had taken that step. So I got her to recommend some basic supplies and the next days I practised again and again in front of a mirror until I was satisfied. At the back of my mind was that if I got back to my old work I would not have much need for makeup. That reminded me. It was in this new image I presented myself back at Dr. Simonson's office. He did a double take "My goodness, Dr. Doering. What a change! I can hardly believe you're the same person." "Yes, it is a change although I'm still working on it. I'm not sure if I'm the same person or not! But I've got a new first name too and we might as well use it. It's Breanna now, and I use Bree for short." "Uh, it looks like you are adjusting well. At least by your clothing and your face. You look very smart, and I hope you don't mind me complimenting you." "Not at all. Yes, it's taken several months, though, and I'm still not quite there." "In what way?" "I'm still a little self conscious, as if I'm acting." "I don't detect that at all. So, Bree, what now?" "I wanted to ask you several things. First, has any more been found on the pink glow?" He shook his head. "Nothing at all. We duplicated the radiation but none of the test animals were affected. That means there has to be some other factor somewhere. We are still trying some other variables. Maybe we're totally on the wrong track. "How about yourself? By your appearance I'd say you had accepted your change well. I think Dr. Lloyd would be glad to go over things with you again. Are you willing to meet her?" "Actually, I already did. Jess has been very good to me . She's quite intrigued by my change. "But the next thing, I want to know and I'm sure your budget can't carry me forever, I want to get back to work." I could almost see the relief on his face. He would be thinking of his budget. "Certainly Bree.You can get your old job back if you want. In fact I'd already talked about this with Bill. Whenever you want to start. You did great work before and we need you. Although, would you like the same section of another? I don't know how you and your former colleagues would react to each other." "I think I would be fine, as long as they are. Just one thing though. I don't ever want to go back to space again." "Yes, I can see why. Anything else? "The third thing, how is Roderigo doing? Roderigo Maldonado? He said he was staying here and was going to think about his options. I'm saying 'his' because he hadn't decided to take surgery or what. He's not in the place he was." "Yes, I was discussing him with Bill too. He says they tried to contact him but they had no answers. The Agency would like to help him but we can't force him." "What is the last contact?" "It's his quarters here, where he used to live, but then he took an apartment in town but apparently he left there too. Now he doesn't reply to any mail we don't have any email or telephone number either. "I want to contact her." I had plans in mind. Mark's eyebrows raised when I said 'her', but he said nothing other than, "Please let us know if we can help." I went first to the apartment but, as the director had told me, Rigo was gone. I went to the block's custodian and almost had second thoughts when I saw his eyes run up and down me, giving me the male once over. "Excuse me, I'm looking for a tenant who used to live here, Mr. Maldonado." "Sorry, miss, he left here a week or so ago and didn't leave a forwarding address." His body language said he was not interested in helping me either so I turned to go but as I was leaving an older woman came up to me. "Excuse me, miss. I heard you asking about a former tenant. I may have seen him. He left here some weeks ago, but I've seen him down at the market the last two Saturdays. It was quite early on." The next Saturday I went to the market At eight o clock and hung around, walking slowly round and round the booths. At one point a security officer confronted me. "Excuse me, miss, you've been hanging around here for some time. Can I ask your reason?" "Yes, I'm looking for a friend I've been told he was here. Look, here is my drivers' license. That will do as ID." He checked it and nodded. "Very well, Miss. Hope you find who you're looking for." It was at that time I spotted her and ran to her. "Rigo!" I cried. She looked up startled. Then a stricken expression came on her face and she turned as if to run but I had caught her arm. "Rigo, what's going on?" "Brett?" She stared at me. "Yes, but I call myself Breanna now, Bree for short. I have to speak to you. Why are you hiding?" At that she broke down. Ignoring the curious looks of onlookers I steered her outside. "Is there a place we can talk?" "Yeah. We can go to my place. It's just round the corner." By her looks Rigo hadn't been taking care of herself. By her shabby clothes she hadn't moved on from the dowdy style we had first used. The apartment was totally untidy, and things just scattered Around. It looked like she had given up on life. Her face was lined and worn and gray looking but, despite that, it was definitely a woman's face. "Brett, I mean Bree, I can't believe it, looking at you. You look just like a woman!" I looked at Rigo, slightly severely. "I am a woman. You know that. So are you. Whatever that phenomenon did to me, it did the same to you too ! It's no use trying to hide it. Rigo, look, you were a bright guy. Now you're living like this. Are you doing yourself justice? You can do better. We both had our lives turned upside down and we're not ever going to change back. So we have to live with it. I've started." "Brett, I mean Bree, when you left on holiday I felt I was abandoned. Sorry, Bree. You had asked me to go with you, and you've a right to make your own decisions but I just felt lost. Then I couldn't decide what to do. So I just slid into a funk. I couldn't make any decisions. Then I wanted away and I ended up in this place." "Rigo, I had my own problems, but I was lucky. I met a bunch of young women in Maui and they showed me how. It was not deliberate, more just by example, I suppose. It may not be easy, but you can do it too." I changed my tone. "From now on you're going to live as a woman and I'm going to help you. At first you may feel like an imposter or feel like you're acting, but it will become natural. "Now first. You are going with me to get some new clothes. To start with, I want you to start thinking of yourself as a woman and that means a name change. How about, uh Regan?" She twisted her face. "Sounds Celtic, and for a Latina like me? I guess it's okay." I saw her sounding out the name. If she was thinking of herself as 'Latina'. It was a good start. "Come on then! Right now we're going to get you new clothes. Definitely girl clothes." Panic in her eyes. "But people will see me!" "So what! You will look completely like a woman, a Latina, didn't you say? So do you really think they would single you out or even notice you? Other than how you look just now. You look like a street person!" I was glad I had decided to wear a skirt with pantyhose and modest heels. Seeing how I had adapted might make it easier to get her along that path. Thank goodness for department stores. We could get a reasonable choice of all we wanted in one store and we did not have to be running in and out of boutiques. We started in the lingerie department. She'd still been wearing a bra at least, but it was the same old thing she'd first got months ago with me. It was worn too. Functional? Barely! Stylish? No! Attractive? Definitely not! So we got her a variety, mostly in pretty colours but a black one too. We got her more panties too, nice coloured satin ones with lace and flowers to replace her plain white cotton ones. I just ignored her objections and used all of my persuasive powers and by the time we were finished in the store she was even making constructive comments. We dropped her old bra in a garage can in the store and I would put the rest in the trash when I got her back home. Pantyhose were next. She just gaped at the selection at first and I knew I'd have a struggle ahead of me getting her to put them on. I showed her my own legs, lifting my skirt slightly. "Look how smooth they look on my legs! Your's will be the same!" She just made a face but back home I would get her to put them on. For nightwear, I wondered about throwing out her T-shirts and getting her into a satin one but I actually found my own cotton T-shirts comfortable so I left that for another day. I hesitated when we passed by the section with pants and jeans. Like me, she'd probably end up wearing pants when she decided to go back to work or just everyday activities but I wanted to get her into unmistakably and distinctive women's wear to get her used to it. So that meant skirts and dresses. I was throwing her in at the deep end because the wading section approach hadn't worked. I was the one pushing her now, but I mentally thanked the five Minneapolis girls who had helped me over my last hurdles. By the time we had chosen several nice tops and skirts for her I began to feel hungry. We weren't finished at all but I needed break so first we adjourned to my place, where I had her undress and take a shower. I gave her a nice scented body wash and shampoo then I cajoled her into one of her new bras, one of her pretty new panties and the pantyhose. Then I sat her down at my dressing table and used my new-found skills to tidy her up and make up her face, not heavily at all, just light enough for daytime.i didn't want to overwhelm her. Still, I had all my work cut out, complimenting her as I want along, heading off any complaints or objections as they arose. At last I had got her dressed in a light top with a scoop neck and a loose skirt. "You look very nice," I complimented her. "Thanks, I guess." "All right, I' m getting hungry," I announced. "What now?" "I'm taking you to lunch, that place along the street. It'll be a late one I guess. And we're walking there." Once I had her out of the door I slid my arm in hers just in case she had second thoughts. "This skirt, I feel exposed!" "Relax, the feeling will wear off. You will soon get used to it. Remember, I've been through all of this." Regan's manner got better and better and I kept her busy with questions, comments on the food , our experiences so that she had little time to think about her situation. At last we were finished lunch. "You are doing okay?" I asked. "Yes, I think I am." "But are you enjoying yourself?" "No, far from it, but I'm not as deathly scared now." "That's good because we now have to do shopping, part two." "What's that for?" "More clothes, shoes and footwear, and accessories, maybe some jewelry and other things." "Do we have to?" "We're on a good run so let's not stop now. I want to get it over with." By six o clock that day I had her reasonably well supplied with women's clothing. She was still a bit apprehensive but I think the simple fact that no one had called her out was a great relief. It would have been highly unlikely anyway, but nervous people imagine all sorts of possibilities. It had been good for me too. I was so busy with guiding her that I had I almost forgotten my own residual reservations. I was exhausted though, and we had all the basics so I called a halt and I invited her home where we had a glass of wine each. I was too tired to think about making supper so again we walked to another restaurant, not too far, as I had persuaded her to get shoes with a heel. She was a bit wobbly but soon got the hang of it. We had a good d meal and when we were finishing she held my hands. "Bree, this has been a long rough day but I thank you for it. You forced me, but I know I can now get on with this." I hugged her. "You know what you're doing on Monday?" "No, what?" "I'm picking you up to go and see Bill Mitchell and you are going to talk about getting back to work. He's already given me the OK." It took a bit more cajoling but she agreed and when I met Regan afterwards she was pleased but nervous. " I think what will happen is you'll be a one day wonder, " I said. "After that you'll be just another female colleague." That fairly well described what happened with both of us, awkward at first, then tailing off over a week. It was good to get back to work and I resumed the research I had been doing before the expedition. From time to time I'd get a visit from the medics to check on me but they usually left disappointed. I was no different from any other woman. The geneticists too could discover no measurable effect despite having two identical X chromosomes. Occasionally there were visits and interviews from one or other scientific sections to discuss progress or lack of it, more lusually. I also met with Jess more and more and our acquaintance evolved and deepened into friendship. We began to meet for coffee and I enjoyed meeting many of her female friends. "You're all the way, there, Bree," she said. "How do you mean?" "You're relaxed, totally at home. Your mannerisms, your talk, all that. They're totally female." "So you're still studying me?" She laughed. "Of course! You're a walking research subject." She gave me a hug. "Oh, I like your fragrance!" I was pleased. I'd just started to wear a light touch. So it was through her doing that I began to develop a social life again and through her mainly that I began to make a circle of friends. I like to think I had become a fairly normal woman. Through her circle of friends I started to be invited to parties, occasionally for dinners too, but these was more awkward. These were usually for couples and a single woman was awkward. Parties were better. I even dated some men too, but no relationships came out of them. I was only mildly interested. But it was at one of the parties I met Jess' brother Kyle again. He had come up to me at one of her parties. "Hi, I'm Kyle Fraser. You having a good time? Your face is slightly familiar, but I can't place it." I wondered if that was his usual starting line with women. I had used it myself in the past, that now seemed so distant. Maybe he was actually sincere. "I'm Bree. I'm a friend of your sister Jess." His head lifted slightly in recognition. "Oh yes, I remember I saw you with her some months back. But you look a little different from then." You've no idea, I thought. I was still getting used to the new me. "Well, I hope it's for the better," I said. His eyes crinkled a little. "A little changed but I doubt if there could be much improvement!" So our flirting was off to a good start. We carried on and I found myself enjoying the light talk, slightly teasing, sometimes suggestive. It was as if my body had started on automatic pilot. I knew I was touching my hair, looking into his eyes then lowering them, angling my bod to show my bust and hips. I even caught myself touching his arm and getting close inside his personal space. "Say, it's noisy in here, you want to go outside and talk?" he asked and I allowed myself to be ushered outside, his hand lightly grazing the small of my back. I wondered how I should react if it dropped any lower. As we casually moved to the French windows out to the pool I saw Jess give me a beaming smile and a wink. It was a lovely night. Our conversation started casually then changed, slowly from the trivial to more serious, and he was telling me about himself. He had retired from the army two years before and was working with the city. I told him the truth. I was an astronomer. "So stars are in your eyes?" "That's so corny! I hope you've got better lines than that." But I smiled as I said it. I added that I was with the same organization as Jess and I had known her through work. He made no comment other than to compliment me so I guessed Jess had kept my case confidential. Then he asked, " Would you like to have dinner with me?" and, my stomach thumping, I agreed. But I knew I would have to call Jess for a talk and some advice. He asked how I was getting home but I just said I had my car with me, and I had been up early so I was going home and I gave him a little kiss on the cheek. That was a first. In a previous life I had kissed many girls, complete with smooth cheeks, smooth lips and smooth breasts. Kyle's cheek was just slightly bristly, but that seemed appropriate. Jess beat me to the punch, calling me the next day. "So should I tell you to be careful with my baby brother?" she asked. "Are you going to see him again?" "Yes, and I'll use soft hands." I was quickly serious. "Jess, does Kyle know anything about me?" "Bree, I am bound by professional ethics. Common sense too. I assure you I have told him nothing, nor will I. If your relationship develops, it will be up to you. However, professionally, I advise you not to say anything. We have managed to keep what happened secret from Kyle and everybody outside the facility. I think Kyle could be trusted but there is always the danger of it getting out. Your life would become a misery from the tabloids and scurrilous news sites, maybe also from religious nuts and pseudo scientists. You already have a group of real scientists who'd love putting you under a microscope." That sobered me up PDQ. "Bree, say I meet with you and we can cook up some past life for you? However, more pertinent things, is Kyle taking you to dinner?" "Yes, tomorrow night, but I've no idea where." "What are you wearing?" "I hadn't got as far as thinking about that?" I heard her chuckle. " Then maybe you're not quite there yet, as a woman , I mean. You'd be thinking about it right away! Just kidding, sort of! Look, Bree, knowing my brother's tastes, it will be somewhere a bit fancy, so I recommend a dress. You should get an LBD." "What's that? It sounds like a disease or a sandwich!" "It's a little black dress, a woman's classic default dress. It's very versatile because you can accessorize it up or down as you want. I'll meet you tomorrow and we'll choose you one." The dinner went well. Kyle and I talked about the kind of day we had had. We talked about our work , our interests, about news and even about politics .I was wearing the lovely black dress I had bought with Jess' advice. It was in a textured fabric with a slightly flared skirt, a scoop neck and cap sleeves and came to the top of my knees. I had teamed it with black heeled shoes and dark pantyhose. I had also been daring and underneath I was wearing a black bra and panties. With a fine gold chain round my neck that matched my earrings . I also carried a black shiny purse. I just felt glamorous and poised. Sexy too. But of course, we talked about ourselves and our hopes. Well, not quite. I kept encouraging Kyle to talk about himself prompting him with questions. But I said little about myself. When he took me home I did not invite him in but I kissed him, lips to lips. His arms went around me and I felt myself tingle . I had taken a small apartment, off the facility. I wanted my own place and more privacy. We were on our fourth date, also a dinner one, and we had reached dessert when he leaned back and put his hands over mine. "Bree, you have to tell me about yourself. Over our last dates I've told you all about me, now it's your turn." I took a deep breath. Jess had warned me not to talk about my true story and we had even cooked up a false history but I wanted to be a little more honest with this man. "Kyle, I like you very much and I think our relationship is going somewhere. I have things in my past, but I can't tell you them. Please trust me." He looked at me. "Bree, you are the loveliest woman I have known. Yes, I sense something in you, but I won't ask any further. I would like to know more about you but if you want to keep it secret then I will respect that." This time, when he took me home, I invited him in. "You're sure?" he asked. I had made my decision but I gave him a frosty look. "And what exactly did you think was going to happen, you lech?" Then I laughed and pulled his arm. We had barely got my door closed when I put my arms up round his neck, pulled him to me and we kissed, long and slow. I felt a small internal satisfaction when I felt myself get wet: my female body was reacting as it should. I kicked off my heels. His hands were pressing me to him and my breasts were crushed against his chest, making a pleasant pressure on my nipples. In a minute they were behind my neck and at the catch of my zipper and it was being slid down, slowly, between my shoulder blades, the small of my back, my waist and over my rear. My dress slipped easily from my upper arms and I stepped out of it when it slid to the floor. "My turn now" I eased off his light jacket his shirt and unbuckled his belt, slid down his zipper and let his pants fall to the floor. I rubbed my hands over his chest then lightly pinched his nipples. I had not planned this and I wondered if we were going to make love on the carpet, but he scooped me up and carried me, lightly laughing, to my bed. "All right you can take the rest off!" I suggested. The pantyhose took a little bit of manoeuvring, and I decided the next time it would be a good idea to wear stockings. Pantyhose were too awkward and unsexy to put on and almost as bad to take off. Then it was my bra loosening and falling off, and my panties were past my feet. He had taken off his socks and I eased his underwear from his hips, past his erection. When I kissed him gently he drew in his breath. We kissed again on the lips and I felt his hand between my legs, finding my groove, stroking me gently then finding the moist opening waiting for him. And I spread my legs. He was over me, and kissed each nipple until it was hard. I felt him at my nether lips. With a light touch, then a firmer push and with a tiny twinge of pain he was in me, moving slowly, ever faster and faster until I was lost in some nebulous space, only aware of the delicious tension building in me until it burst and I cried out. I felt myself pulse as he climaxed too. I awoke in the morning, suddenly panicking at feeling a body beside me but almost immediately at peace with the comforting warmth of human contact, with a man I was in love with. He stirred too, looked up at me and I kissed him awake on his bristly face. "That was wonderful. If you'll give me a repeat performance I'll make you breakfast after." After, I wondered if Jess would be interested in my opinion that women felt it better than men, and what I had been up to with her brother. Maybe... Kyle kept his word about my secret. Through all of our long married life, through triumphs and tears, through up and downs, he never asked. END