Shutter Bug II A Different Angle
- 2 years ago
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The day’s torture wasn’t over, since we still had to tell Heather about the state of things. She was supposed to be calling me that evening after dinner. Lara and I had discussed what we would say to her, but it hadn’t been easy to come up with anything. It felt cruel, now, as we remembered how inspired she’d been the past few days. Now we had to throw sand over it again and bury it away. Before dinner we went for another walk since it was easier to talk freely that way. It was dark, so we...
Colin and Shannon were still chatting near the door to Jane’s classroom, so I told her I’d grab our regular seats. When the bell rang a few minutes later, she joined me. “I guess we’ll have to check out the photos later,” Shannon said apologetically. “Tomorrow’s another day,” I said, grinning. “Nah, no school tomorrow.” I turned to her as Jane called for quiet. “Really? Why?” “Another big storm,” she whispered. “Whoa! They already cancelled?” “I don’t know. But we’re going to get...
After the successful phone call to Colin, Shannon was on cloud ten as we tramped through the deepening snow with the saw horses. Well, I carried the barricades; she badgered me about not being allowed to help. “They’re not that heavy,” I dismissed. “Which is why you should let me carry one!” “They’re crazy heavy,” I amended quickly, pretending to stagger. “This isn’t the eighteen-thirties, Matt. Chivalry is pretty much dead.” “Says the girl who dances in a show where there is literally a...
Friday. The last day before the masks went on, before Dad would have to sleep in my desk drawer for two full seasons, and before Truth was buried, maybe forever. We cleaned, we arranged, we considered everything to make our home normal. After dinner, the four of us were satisfied with both the house and the cabin. Our guests would be treated with respect and love. After dinner, Lara and I went for a walk. It was made much easier by the fact that Colin and Shannon had plowed our driveway at...
Given the unknown amount of potential baggage, Sarah decided to pick up the twins by herself. At best, one more person could have gone with her, but if it turned out that Muireann and Tommy were major packers then it would’ve been a tight fit and an uncomfortable ride. We knew from their letter that they’d likely be bringing some instruments with them. “Better safe than sorry. Besides, this will be my first and last chance to talk to them, I’m sure,” Sarah joked. “Don’t worry, we’ll let you...
I’d set an alarm for five, deciding that the lack of sleep would be better than leaving the twins stranded by themselves. However, when I slapped the sound off and staggered out into the living room, all was quiet. Figuring they’d be up soon, I grabbed my Walkman and stretched out on the couch to relax while I waited. As it turned out, I fell asleep and Lara ended up waking me up. I started, surprised to see her shaking me. “What time is it?” I asked, pulling the tangled headphones from my...
Figuring that the ‘warmest’ part of the day was passing, Lara suggested that if we still wanted to swim, now was the time. Tommy had not forgotten the offer and eagerly agreed, not put off by the frigid air temperature. We put away our guitars and returned to the house to don bathing suits. It was admittedly a bit odd, since Lara and I never did so; pulling jeans over the trunks felt completely alien. Lara had a giant stack of towels in her arms when we met up in the living room. Muireann...
“Well, last period is finally here. Enjoying the first day?” I asked, leading Muireann to some desks on the side of the classroom. I avoided my usual study hall spot, where Carl and a couple of other guys I usually sat with were already seated. “Aye, though it’s been a whirlwind,” she admitted. “Yeah, introducing you in each class ... I swear everyone has met you three times over!” Muireann sniffed. “At least that many. It felt a bit odd, all that. But everyone seems nice.” “For the most...
The morning Alana dropped me off, my reunion with Lara was delicious. We shared a long and happy hug. I’d made every effort while with Alana to do exactly one thing: be with my dear friend. But on returning, I let all that stored-up love for Lara emerge again, and I didn’t want to let go of her. Of course, we eventually had to peel apart. She was due at the shelter soon, so after greeting my moms and Frej, we resumed our morning walks that she’d kept up in my absence. As usual, we didn’t...
We entered August, the last full month of summer, of vacation, and of divine mountain warmth. I spent all my time at Clara’s; Lara increased her hours at the shelter since Chuck hired her more formally and started paying her for her computer work. Our tent became lived-in and undeniably welcoming the more we used it and adjusted our setup. With Frej’s help, we’d flown an oversized tarp above the area that gave us some dry space around the shelter in times of rain. It remained a heavenly...
Are you sure about this... ? Back down by the house, I found Frej in the garage. He was peering closely at a tangle of wires. “These new electronics...” he grumbled. “They are all so small and impossible to fix... ! Or maybe I need glasses.” I laughed as best I could with the tremors that seemed to be creeping into me from all sides. I haven’t been sure of anything lately... “Need a break?” I asked. He tossed the thing onto the worktable and grinned at me. “Yes, that is enough for...
We followed Heather down the pathway to the rocky intertidal expanse and picked our way toward the rowboat that sat patiently in the shallows. Between us, we silently pushed the craft into deeper waters, until it floated freely with enough clearance for the extra weight it would now carry. Heather held it steady as first Lara and then I got in. She joined us with a nimble leap. I studied the rowboat as I sat in the stern with Lara. Though clearly aged, it was sturdy and well-maintained. A...
Not even twenty-five hours into our new life, it became clear that our bodies were entirely unprepared for the relentless existence of sea-harvesting with Heather. When we awoke after that first night’s sleep, early morning’s glow was faint. What’s the rush? It was Heather who had roused us, and despite various attempts to roll over and slumber away the deep soreness that pervaded every cubic inch of my limbs, she would not allow it. I finally yawned, struggled to sit up, and gave her a look...
“Welcome to darkroom class,” I announced as Muireann followed me into the darkroom the following evening. She eyed me. “Are you going to lie on the bed again?” I grinned broadly. “I think I might, and let you do the work. Hands-on is the best way to learn, right?” “You’re going to give Tommy a run for the title of laziest boy.” “Am I winning yet?” Muireann just smirked and started blacking out the windows. “I have to admit something,” she said. “What’s that?” “I didn’t realize the...
When Melissa and I returned to the house after dropping off the order for the necklace, nothing much had changed. In the cabin I found Lara and Tommy at the table, intently studying a sheet of paper. They didn’t even glance at me as I closed the door. I could hear Muireann’s muffled fiddle playing from the darkroom, the sound of a slow Irish melody permeating the warmed air inside. “How’s it going?” I announced, taking off my coat. After scribbling something down, Lara turned to me, smiling...
I felt an arm grip my winter coat. “Matt ... I don’t know that we can do this!” “Of course you can. It’s not that hard.” “No, I’m worried about Tommy!” she whispered. “What if he falls? Or runs into someone?” I gave her gloved hand a pat. “He’ll be okay. It’s pretty soft, you know. Watch...” I let myself fall sideways like a cut tree, landing on my hip and shoulder. Muireann gave a little cry of surprise, but I just laughed it off. In another moment I was standing again. “You want to...
“We need to decide what song we’re going to audition with,” I announced, as the five of us settled into the cabin for some rehearsal. Colin looked at me. “Let’s vote then. What are the choices? We have a lot of songs that we know now. Some more than others.” “I’m thinking we should do an original,” I offered. “We have Four Days, Shell Game, Absinthe... And Please Don’t Stop, but since we played that one at the show last year, probably not a good idea.” “Don’t forget Gunkstomp!” Lara...
“What have we here?” Jane asked, coming to a stop in front of our half-dozen pictures. “Twins,” Muireann said. “Aha.” She examined our spread. “Did you do the project together?” “Aye, we tried something different.” I could hear the hope in Muireann’s voice, that this would be okay by our teacher. Jane pursed her lips. “Interesting approach.” “I know there’s only six photos, but we both did take six shots,” I explained. “There’s two exposures on each!” Jane gave me a small smile. “Yes,...
“Damn, I’ve missed you,” I whispered. She giggled. “Wow, I didn’t realize how much!” “Hey now! Hands above the waist!” Heather cuddled up closer to me on the couch as the hubbub carried on in the rest of the great room. After all the greetings and chats following our guests’ arrival, dinner was soon going to be ready. With Frej volunteering to help with what remained of meal preparations, we’d been told to go hang out. Not being one to deny my parents’ wishes, I didn’t think twice to drag...
I tried delaying our hike for a day. I really did. Although Heather’s ankle was sore after she removed the ski boots in the lodge, by the time we got home it was already feeling a little better. She could certainly get around, since it mostly hurt only when putting sideward pressure on it. Skiing was probably out for a few days, at least, but a walk through the woods was not worth postponing. Or so she said. I was of two minds. Twenty-four hours of extra rest would allow more time for her to...
The music store wasn’t too far from the jeweler’s shop, so Heather and I walked there. “I mean, I get it, now,” I said, still caught up in the surprising meaning of the Chinese symbol she now wore around her neck. “Oh, I think you got it a long time ago,” Heather said. “It’s just a word, Matt. It has no meaning on its own.” “I know, I know. It’s just ... most people would find it kind of...” “Weird,” she supplied. “You said it, not me,” I laughed. “It is what it is.” “Yeah ... Anyway,...
Three girls, three cameras... And me, tagging along, superfluous but certainly enjoying myself. I offered to be their model a few times, but they seemed to prefer photographing each other. And there was the teasing, of course. Endless. “Nice, Muireann!” Heather chirped. “You’ve learned a lot about photography, I can tell.” “She has a good eye,” Shannon agreed. “Matt has been teaching me.” “Which makes it all the more surprising!” Funny... But even there, I was given three cute grins,...
Admittedly, I was slightly apprehensive as we pulled into our clearing that evening after our day of skiing. Heather, alone with Tommy all day... The snow was falling heavily again through the headlight beams. Both Frej’s and the Martins’ cars were parked in the same positions they had been that morning, and they remained covered in several inches of snow. Oddly, there were no lights on in the main house. Maybe Muireann was rubbing off on me, because for a few seconds I had a panicked vision...
Mairead and Aongus left after lunch the next day, forced to end their vacation earlier than Frej and Heather due to the demands of the business they owned. I was indeed grateful for the Danishman’s generosity in allowing Heather to remain for another three days. The Martins’ departure left a rather obvious hole in our daily schedule. After dinner was cleared and we sat around the table, it suddenly seemed remarkably silent. The positive feedback loop between Tommy and Aongus had been...
I was grateful for the band. Heather’s departures were never a good thing for me, inevitably the start of a long slide down into wistful distance, but the fact that I could go from our final embrace to playing my guitar within fifteen minutes was at the very least a welcomed distraction. “So we need to start thinking about a set for the battle,” I said, once we’d played a few numbers to warm up and clear the farewell feelings as best we could. “We have six originals, so we’ll need another...
The week passed slowly and somewhat agonizingly, since Gwen couldn’t rehearse again until the following weekend, and the homework was being laid on thick. I was anxious to make as much progress as we could on the set, which we still hadn’t quite settled on. Certainly as the battle approached, I was imagining more and more how it might turn out, even though I knew that daydreaming about the glories of winning was a dangerous game. Things could turn out so many different ways, surely, but in...
If I hadn’t been sure that Tommy had Dr. Kendall in his back pocket, that was put to rest in study hall the following Tuesday. Carmen, Tommy, and I were walking along the outside of the school building, on our way to the fields as was our habit now, when the principal rounded the far corner and came toward us. “Uh oh,” Carmen said. “Caught.” “Principal alert,” I whispered, for Tommy’s benefit. The three of us laughed quietly, all of us wearing shades as was our other habit these days. “We...
Carmen was disappointed but seemed understanding when I called her to let her know that we didn’t have room for her after all. It was a bit strange to talk to her on the phone, something that I didn’t think I’d ever done before. Odd, considering we were together for a while. Then again, this fact was testament to how messed up that time had been for me. Saturday evening arrived, and it was not without some anxiety that we packed the gear into Colin and Shannon’s vehicles. While my moms...
“Hello?” “Oh hi, Mrs. Martin. How are you?” “Matt ... It’s me,” Heather said. I jerked in my chair. “What... ? No way! You said ‘Hello’!” “I guess I did.” This must be part of a joke... “Okay ... Where have you been? We were supposed to talk on Wednesday, remember?” “What day is it today?” Heather asked. I was quiet for a second. “It’s Friday? Seriously, is everything all right? You answered weird ... Well, you answered normally, which is weird for you. And you really don’t know what...
I was surprisingly alert when Tommy and I slipped into Frej’s car at a quarter of six, just as the light was starting to make itself known in the east. I let Tommy have the front so I could squeeze against Heather in the back. “Good morning, my love,” she whispered, and immediately I wondered if I was overdressed for the warmth she caused in me. Maybe forgetting all my clothes at home would be okay after all. Damn kissing ban, though... “Is your man coming with us today?” Tommy asked...
Lara responded so sweetly when I asked if she could entertain the twins, that I took her into a surprisingly hard hug. We were alone in my room, so I made no effort to hold back. “Easy there, bro,” she warned, even as she returned the tight embrace. “I’m so sorry about the underwater thing,” I breathed. “I still feel terrible about it.” “No sweat. I know you didn’t do it on purpose, because you hate doing laundry. And now you’re stuck doing it every day!” I laughed. “True. But it’s the...
It was strange to wake up. I was still on the couch, but Heather was gone, and I was horizontal and covered by a blanket. I could hear my moms and aunt chatting in the living room, since I was occupying their usual morning hangout spot. Then again, the sun was bright and the shadows on the porch floor were well past parallel to the wood beams, suggesting that my first meal of the day would be called ‘late lunch’ and certainly not ‘breakfast’. So, I really took their usual afternoon spot......
I think I’m half-Danish... It took me a moment, I’ll admit. It was perhaps like seeing someone on a distant hill make an odd movement, and only realizing a long second later that it was the head-on motion of an archer having released an arrow to fly forth from her bow. It took me a moment, yes, but then that five-word missile arrived, slamming into my heart with surgical precision. The world seemed to spin. I only knew one Danish person, and I knew him quite well. I struggled to hold her...
“Do you wish this never happened?” she asked quietly. I turned to look at Heather, her face illuminated by the fading twilight. Until now, Heather had not spoken in the half-hour or so since I’d silently confirmed her connection to Frej. I didn’t mind the quiet, because I had much to think about myself. The pier was strangely deserted, and we’d migrated to the gazebo to sit. “Why do you say that?” I asked. “Because it really puts a new light on everything.” “It does, it does,” I agreed....
I was just about to make a call when Lara poked her head into my room. “Back to the telephone life, huh?” she said, giving me a sympathetic look. “Yep. Hard times again.” “You could’ve been born a hundred years ago,” she observed, “and then you wouldn’t even have had the phone.” “If I’d been born a hundred years ago, I would’ve missed out on her completely. And on you too, sis ... But I’m glad for the phone either way.” Lara nodded thoughtfully. “True. Come up to the cabin when you’re...
On Monday, I was very relieved to get summoned to the principal’s office. Despite the amused looks I got from my classmates, I was feeling pretty high. Dr. Kendall had been silent since our meeting the previous week, a bit worrisome since the time before May wasn’t exactly abundant. But I trusted in his promise, and now it seemed we’d be shifting into gear. When I stepped into his office, another man was already sitting in one of the chairs. He looked vaguely familiar. I took the initiative...
“Sorry I stole your bed,” Lara said, giving me a sheepish grin as she wandered out of my room the next morning. I shrugged. “The couch is comfortable enough.” “I didn’t mean to fall asleep. We were working on lyrics, you know, and ... Yeah. Where is everyone?” “Colin’s not here yet, and Gwen came by a while ago but just grabbed Muireann and took off. And you and Tommy have been sleeping like logs.” “Where did Gwen take her?” “Beats me. She said they’d be back in a few...
“Hello?” Uh oh ... That’s not good... “I don’t like the sound of that,” I said. “The last time you answered ‘Hello’ was—” “Good evening, Matt,” Mairead interrupted. “Oh, hi, Mrs. Martin!” “Heather is not here,” she added, her voice quite amused. I would’ve laughed, except that I suddenly realized how close I’d just been to revealing Heather’s secret. Holy shit... ! Way too close. “I’m sorry about that just now,” I explained, my skin prickling. “Sometimes Heather, well ... She’ll...
The scene at Smith Park, when we pulled in around noon, was rather astonishing. The light scaffolds loomed over the stage, and for a long moment I stood by the car door in complete shock. We’re going to be playing on that... ! “Are you coming, lad?” Tommy asked, having already seized his guitar and equipment bag from the trunk. I snapped out of it and went to grab my own things. “Yeah. It’s just that ... it looks pretty damn neat, man.” He grinned. “I’m sure it does. Now let’s go set...
The post-concert went by in a rush. People came and went, to greet us, share their joy and emotions. The twins and Lara in particular were mobbed, which was fine with me. I’ve had just about as much excitement as I can take... After hugging the people closest to me, I slipped back up to the stage again, grateful for the banality of winding cables, collapsing mic stands, and the opportunity to help the sound and lighting crews get their work done just a little faster. They’d been amazing...
Away... From us... To say these words affected me would be a vast understatement. The massive upwelling that I’d seen a moment earlier in Heather’s eyes, that flood which would destroy everything around ... It suddenly burst out of the sea. Nothing prepared me for its impact. My throat constricted and suffocation beckoned, caressing me gently into blackening edges. “Why?” I tried to ask, but the sound was grotesque, a pitiful gurgle at best. “Shh, shhhh,” she consoled through tears,...
On the day that our connection was severed, I was roused by a warm hand caressing my face, the fingers leaving behind energetic currents. “Good morning, my love...” I opened my eyes all at once. The sun was just barely tinting the sky, and I was disoriented, wondering why the couch felt odd. It took me a moment to realize that I was down in the main house. Memories abruptly returned in a panicked rush. The night before, after partying for a while, the three of us had taken to Lara’s old bed...
The long work of pulling the concert together had fully caught up and crashed into me. That wasn’t the source of my problems, though, or I would’ve simply slept hard for a few days and been done with it. If I’d wanted to take a ‘sick’ day or two to stay home from school, no one would have batted an eyelid, for any of us. I wouldn’t have even had to fake a fever, holding the thermometer against a hot light bulb. I could just cash in on good karma. Instead, on Wednesday I’d found myself...
“So, how much of this will you tell Tommy?” It was the first thing Muireann had said in some time, having grown progressively more reticent as I revealed my secrets to her, one by one. There were many, so it had taken a long while. But they were out, now... All of them. “Tommy...” I murmured. “Yeah, I’m not sure.” “He’s very fond of Lara.” I sniffed. “I know that. You think he’ll be weirded out?” “I can’t say for sure. And what about her?” I frowned. “Lara? She knows all of this...
I was waiting for Muireann to emerge from the restroom before we headed to photography class, when I felt a tap on my shoulder. I figured she was playing the other-shoulder trick to get me to look the wrong way, but I was surprised to find Bruno there after all. “Oh, hey man ... What’s up?” I greeted. “We need to talk,” he said quietly, glancing anxiously down the hall. “Hm. Let me guess ... Pete?” “Yeah. Are you heading to class? I can walk with you.” “I am, but ... I need to wait for...
That evening, I was once again drained. Despite the temporary refueling that Muireann had gifted me in the pool after the terror of Pete’s episode, the subsequent rehearsal of Other Side had eventually sapped me. I could also tell that Muireann was almost as wiped as I was. The song was intense. It was a great relief when we both settled down into our beds in the main room of the cabin, her on the cot and me on the couch. “The downside of sleeping out here is that you can’t go to bed until...
Pete didn’t attend school the rest of the week. The two times I called over to his house, I hung up as soon as I heard his dad answer. Even Bruno said that he hadn’t been able to talk to him since the day he canned Skinner. I was feeling unsettled again, but I held on to the hope that whatever was in motion was happening out of sight. It was all I could do, besides barging over there again and trying to force another chat. In the meantime, I made sure that all my other irons were still in...
The talent show was in full swing. Ready or not, the acts were cycling on and off the stage with inevitable tempo. This time around, Green Space had opened the show, and The Nameless would soon close it. “I hope Pete keeps it together,” I said to Lara, as we stood in the wing watching a kid play a rather impressive classical piece on the piano. “He will. Muireann seems to have a calming influence on him.” “Yeah, I noticed. She’s been so helpful in dealing with Pete these last few weeks, I...
It was early evening on Sunday and the final music marathon was coming to an end, our last opportunity for rehearsing as a full band before Jonah’s concert the following weekend. Gwen was particularly intent about everything, calling out any and all problems she heard, and by now we didn’t question her judgment or ear. The only unknown was if we had the skill to do whatever she asked of us. Usually we did, even if it meant practicing it thirty times. Or more, in my case... But now it was...
We arrived at Jonah’s in the early afternoon as arranged. He emerged from the side door of the Castle, grinning broadly. “What’s up, motherfuckers!” “Fella’s in a better mood than usual,” Tommy quipped. “Aye, probably this is his highest form of greeting,” Muireann added. We exchanged fist bumps, handshakes, and shit-eating grins. “This event is going to be the jewel in the Castle’s crown, I’m fucking telling you!” he gushed. “You’ve been busy,” Lara said, looking around at the yard...
Sunday was a complete waste. I spent the morning dead to the world, vaguely aware of being moved from Jonah’s cabin to Shannon’s car, and then to Colin’s recliner. At least the world was happy about something, because whenever I was semi-conscious I could mostly hear laughing around me. In retrospect, I was obviously being hidden from my folks until such time that I was with it again; that turned out to be late afternoon. Well, maybe not ‘with it’, but a few hours before dinner I finally...
I slumped in the front seat as Sarah started the car. She drove slowly, winding through the short-term parking lot, then out into the seemingly hundreds of ramps and exchanges that strangled the airport like a concrete octopus. Eventually the stress of navigating lanes and fighting off aggressive taxis dissipated as she started heading east on the Southern State Parkway. East, yes, because we had a stop to make. In fact, the twins would be sleeping in their own beds again before I did. Then...
The elation and fright of what I’d just done with the necklace still fluttered violently in me when I arrived at my destination a little while later. I could still go back to the pier... ‘It was all a mistake, Darya ... A joke... !’ I swiped the ridiculous idea aside as I stared at the house. There was no need to climb the stairs and knock, on the chance that anyone would be there. The ‘For Sale’ sign out front and lack of decorations on the porch were enough indication that they’d moved...
Truth is out... There was a long moment where nothing happened. Having been pulverized, that brittle shell washed away and left everything wide open. All was paused as I remained on the couch, stunned and unsteady. My thoughts all glanced at each other in confusion, blinking in the sudden light. What happens now? Then Clara said one thing to me: ‘Let me go... ‘ It wasn’t really her speaking, of course. I wondered what message she would’ve had for me if I’d answered her question with a...
Chapter 25: The Dreams of a Girl Alana’s driving was a balm, a relaxed and smooth ride augmented by the loose shocks on the wheels of her old Buick. I reclined in the passenger seat, swigging from the wine. “Want some?” I asked, holding up the bottle. “Come on, I’m driving.” “I know. I was just being polite,” I murmured. Alana patted my arm. “Fine. But be safe first, polite second, dude. Someday someone will take you up on that offer and next thing you know you’ll end up making out with...
Lara held my hand as we stood in the currents of the Roe, watching the flow of life as this playful tendril of the sea wound her way around and through us. Each little splash measured one more instant of being together with my sister, little moments that when placed end to end added up to simple perfection. Because the hours that recently passed had been just that: a complete surrender of any fear of each other. Our deeds and misdeeds were starting to come out now, weighed and reckoned, then...
“Good morning, sis!” I sang. “Nice bedhead!” Lara squinted at me from the doorway to the darkroom. She released a giant yawn into the cabin before speaking. “Morning ... Uh, what the hell are you doing in an apron?” “Making breakfast!” “I thought I smelled something good, but then I remembered who I live with and was like, nah, can’t be. What’s the deal? Wait, are you making boxty?” “Fuck yeah!” She came close and scrutinized my meal preparation. “You do realize the twins aren’t here,...
Summer was fully ripened now, it being the latter part of July. The chorus of insects was thick in the air as I walked along the last stretch of our road. I was alone; Lara was already home, having left the shelter an hour before I’d swung by to gather her. In fifteen minutes I’d be in the creek, washed clean by Roe, and enjoying my time with her. Or, so I thought. As usual, expectations sure were a bitch. Well, not a bitch this time, but a gorgeous girl that I adored! “Hey there...