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BORN AGAIN - by Monika Ikon one She had to be crazy coming here. Julie stood on the porch of her ex- lover?s impressive colonial-style home. She caught sight of her reflection in the shiny gold mailbox. She shouldn?t be here, but when Brian?s wife asked her to come ?well, somehow she couldn?t refuse. Maybe it was guilt, maybe it was the need to set things straight. Maybe it was just curiosity over the wife Brian had cheated on and a chance of seeing her old lover one last time? Julie knew she should leave. She should just turn around and walk away. The affair was long over. She hadn?t seen Brian in months. Mrs. Baxter had to know that. Still? Julie took a deep breath and pressed the doorbell. A few moments later, a well-dressed, older, but still very pretty woman came to the door. ?Come in Julie,? the woman said warmly. ?I?m so glad you could make it on such short notice.? Brian?s wife had a very friendly smile. She hadn?t seemed the least bit angry over the phone. But Julie had really no idea what to expect. Now as she followed the petite woman through the hallway of the richly appointed house Julie felt a fresh wave of guilt. ?Look Mrs. Baxter,? Julie said once they were seated in the living room. ?I think I know what this is about and I don?t want any trouble.? ?Oh there isn?t going to be any trouble,? Brian?s wife said. She was wearing a sleeveless white tunic and a matching pair of capri pants. A pair of black mule pumps completed her very sophisticated outfit. ?And please call me Sara.? Julie had hardly known what to wear. Why in the world had she chosen this flouncy red polka-dot dress and these ridiculously high red stilettos? She looked like an 28-year-old tart costumed for an 8- year-old tea party. What in the world had she been thinking? Sitting across from Brian?s ultra-chic wife, Julie felt like just what she feared?the cheap and tasteless 'other woman'. ?You look very cute,? Sara said in a kind, sympathetic voice. Julie knew the older woman was just being nice, but she felt a glow of satisfaction nevertheless. She smiled, happily, for a moment forgetting everything else, ?Thank you?Sara.? Julie looked around the beautifully decorated room. She felt a twinge of jealousy when she remembered how Brian had promised her a house of her own like this someday?after the divorce?the divorce that never happened? The guilt came back, a dark wave that nearly overwhelmed her, and Julie felt terribly ashamed of herself. She tugged at the scalloped hem of her dress, trying to pull it down a little over her bare thighs. Julie had always considered herself quite attractive. She was the perfect epitome of the tall blonde Norwegian type that guys fell head-over-heels for. And Brian, her supervisor at the brokerage firm, had been no exception. But now, sitting in front of this calm, composed, and altogether perfectly put-together woman, Julie felt totally deficient. How could she ever have expected Brian to leave this woman for such a silly and unsophisticated girl as herself? ?Some iced tea?? Brian?s wife asked. Julie did her best not to look intimidated and leveled her blue eyes at Sara. Julie wasn?t thirsty but she said, ?Yes. Please.? The pictures on Brian?s desk didn?t do his wife justice. She was even prettier than Julie had first thought. Her delicate face was framed by a stylish blonde bob. Her oufit showed off a well-tanned, well- aerobicized body. The only signs of age were the faint wrinkles around the older woman?s captivating green eyes. She certainly didn?t fit the stereotype of the traditional middle-aged housefrau that Julie had pictured. Sara handed Julie a tall, frosted glass of iced tea poured from a pitcher on the table. ?We have to talk,? she said. ?Oh please Mrs. Baxter?Sara?if this is about what I think it is you have it all wrong. I haven?t seen your husband in eight months?ever since he resigned his position at Morris & Morris.? Julie remembered the stir it had caused when word came that Brian had resigned. It had been so sudden and unexpected. They said that, according to his wife, he?d had some kind of breakdown and had gone away. Of course, Julie had wanted to call, to find out what had happened, but how could she? It had been awful, really, not knowing what had happened. Over the last several months, she had come to understand that what they?d done was wrong. She just wanted a chance to apologize to Brian?s wife?and to satisfy herself that her old lover was okay. No, that wasn?t all of it. She wanted to see him again. She missed him?they had loved each other, hadn?t they? Brian?s wife had been saying something. ?Huh?? Julie said, ?I?m sorry. I didn?t catch?? ?It?s baby,? Sara said. Almost on cue, the little white baby intercom on the end table next to Brian?s wife sputtered and Julie could hear a snatch of baby talk coming through the speaker. Brian had never mentioned anything about having a child. If Julie had known that? Jesus, would it have made a difference? Julie felt almost sick with shame. How could she even sit in the same room with Brian?s wife? How could this cool, intelligent, beautiful woman even stand to have Julie in her house? She must hate me, Julie thought, mortified. If she did, however, Brian?s wife didn?t show the least trace of disgust. ?Perfect timing,? she said, looking delighted. ?Brittney must be up. I put her down an hour ago. She must be hungry.? ?I didn?t know you had a daughter. Brian never mentioned?? Sara waved away the Julie?s concern. ?Forget that?Would you like to see her? Maybe you can help me feed her. She can be quite a handful.? ?I don?t know?I?m not really good around babies?? ?Come on. She?s in the nursery room. You?ll just love her. She?s quite a little girl?? Julie followed Brian?s wife down the hall with its polished parquet floor to a small room just before the master bedroom. Inside the walls were painted pink and decorated with a border of little hearts and ribbons. There was a playpen filled with stuffed animals, rattles, and other baby toys. Julie saw an open book of lullabies lying on a rocking chair. There were dolls and other little girl toys lying on the pink carpeted floor. And inside a large white-barred crib sat what to all appearances was a pretty teenage girl. She was wearing a very short, very tight pink knit dress. Only that--and a diaper. two Julie stood there, stunned. Sara laughed. ?I guess you recognize her. Well, I suppose I?m more used to the change since I saw it take place gradually. Go ahead, take a closer look.? Julie stepped towards the crib and put her hand to her mouth. ?My God,? she said. ?It?s him, isn?t it? I don?t understand? How?? ?Oh its very simple,? Brian?s wife said. ?The poor darling was under so much pressure. The guilt, the sadness, the desire to make things right again?I?m afraid in the end?? She snapped her fingers. ?He just couldn?t take it anymore. He had a kind of regression, I suppose you could call it.? Julie shook her head, hardly believing her eyes. The girl in the crib was quite beautiful. If she hadn?t known Brian so intimately, it would have been hard to recognize this girl as her former lover. ?But he?s a?she?s a?? ?According to the psychiatrist, it?s a severe reaction to intense sexual guilt. It wasn?t enough for her to start over?she had to reject everything, including her old gender identity. She has only the most charming rudimentary intelligence now. No more big, complicated thoughts to confuse my little Brittney.? Brian?s wife picked up a rattle from the floor of the crib and shook it. Brittney clapped and reached for it. ?She has the physical capacity of about a three-year-old, just enough to walk around a bit on her own. That?s a good thing. After all, as you can see, thought she doesn?t weigh much, maybe 90 pounds in a soaking wet dipey, she?s too big for me to carry.? Julie?s initial shock and horror were slowly giving way to fascination. The girl in the crib certainly was pretty. Her long dark blonde hair was tied with pink ribbons in two long pig-tails. Her lips were painted in a sexy Lolita pout and her eyebrows had been plucked to give her a pleasantly surprised look. Sara interrupted herself to look at her watch. ?Let?s finish this discussion in the kitchen. Baby is due for her feeding.? She opened the side to the crib. ?Come on Brittney. Time for lunchy.? The teenaged girl climbed shakily to her feet, putting her hands with their painted little nails on her smooth knees, and then straightening up gingerly to catch her balance. ?Come on Julie, dear.? ?Oh yes,? she said, shaking her head, hardly believing what she was seeing. ?Coming.? Brian walked ahead of them up the hall, his hands out, apparently not to lose his balance. His diaper made a crinkling sound under his miniskirt. Julie found she had to walk extra slowly alongside Sara to stay behind him. ?I?m afraid the drugs she has to take disturb her equilibrium,? Sara said. ?Poor darling. I can?t let her out of my sight for a second. Still I just adore the way she waddles along. I love that she?s so cute and helpless now. No more running around for her, I?m afraid. No more wondering where she is, what she?s doing. She was always far too independent for her own good. Brian waddled into the kitchen. At the table Julie saw what looked like a baby?s high chair. It was really a kind of modified stool with a back-rest and a wooden tray. It was painted white and trimmed in pink. Along the back, there were painted stenciled flowers, little bears, and alphabet-block letters. And written in a flowing, pretty script, the name ?Brittney.? ?Go climb into your chair, honey,? Sara said. Brian climbed up, and, with Sara?s help, managed to seat himself. Sara pushed the tray into place, effectively locking Brian into the chair. Brian?s wife tied a bib with a 'Hello Kitty' around the teenage girl?s neck. The bib barely covered the tops of her two firm grapefruit-sized breasts. Julie noticed how Brian?s pale, thin legs hung down, his white feet with the pretty pink toenails dangling at least a foot from the linoleum floor. She remembered how strong and hairy Brian?s legs had been. Now they looked as smooth and coltish as any 16-year-old?s. What was even more shocking, they were all but useless. If Brian had any idea what had happened to him, he didn?t give a sign. Instead, he was playing with a ring of plastic keys on his tray. With the bib in place, Sara began to feed Brittney a small jar of rice and pears. ?Open wide darling,? Sara cooed at the curvaceous adult baby girl. Brittney obeyed immediately and contentedly ate her lunch oblivious as the two women talked about him. ?She used to be so athletic,? Julie said. ?That?s all over now,? Ms. Baxter said cheerily. ?No more sports or other games now for my little Brittney, isn?t that right darling?? She tickled Brian under the chin and he giggled and kicked his bare feet. ?No more bulky muscle. I like his legs like this so much better. Don?t you?? Julie didn?t know what to say. She figured that perhaps Brian?s wife was trying to make the best of the situation. At least, she hoped that was the case. ?Don?t you, Julie?? Sara said again, emphasizing the question as if to convey the hint. ?Yes, oh yes,? Julie stammered. ?They are very pretty.? Sara nodded her approval. ?You see Brittney. Julie thinks your legs are prettier this way too.? She turned back to Julie. ?It?s so good for Brittney to have positive reinforcement. She just loves to hear how pretty she looks.? ?I?um?can?t quite believe how?? ?Oh, it?s the hormone therapy. That, and the laser electrolysis. Of course, the atrophy has come from disuse.? Her voice rose to a cheery sing-song when she turned back to Brian. ?Smooth legs and soft feet. Why she never even wears shoes anymore. There?s no need for her to. Sometimes pretty sandals to show off her pretty toesies, but most of the time its bare feet for my baby. You don?t need shoes if you have nowhere to go, do you baby? ? Brian just gurgled. ?He?I mean she?looks very cute barefoot,? Julie said, a little flustered, but actually finding herself getting used to seeing Brian like this. ?I guess I wouldn?t mind that part of it myself.? Sara laughed, looking pleased. ?Oh please, get comfortable. Take your shoes off, if you like. Those heels must be killing you.? ?No, that?s okay,? Julie said. ?I was just saying?? ?Please get comfortable.? ?Its not?? ?I insist.? Julie reached down and pulled off her heels. ?That chair?where did you ever get one like that?? She felt the cool linoleum under her stocking feet. ?Oh this? Brittney?s father made that for her.? ?Her father?? Julie was incredulous. She remembered Brian speaking of his father. According to Brian, his father was a violent man who terrorized Brian as a child. After his mother?s premature death, Brian waited impatiently for the day he would be old enough to leave home, which he did shortly after his sixteenth birthday. He?d never seen his father again. At least that was what Brian had said. They?d had that in common, she and Brian, a motherless childhood and a distant, angry father. It was hard to believe that the angry and intolerant man Brian described would now build an adult high chair for his fully grown son. Although the longer Julie sat with Brian the harder it was getting to think of him any more as either fully grown? or anyone?s son. Still? ?Yes, James has been wonderful with her,? Sara said. ?I was a little worried how he would accept Brittney at first. But once he realized how helpless my poor Brittney is and how much she needs a daddy as much as a mommy, he was okay with it. Now they get on so well. Why, Brittney is just a little daddy?s girl. Aren?t you, honey?? She tickled the sole of one of Brian?s soft feet and he laughed and scrunched his painted toes in delight. ?Oh?? Julie could barely manage. ?That?s great?? Sara went to the refrigerator and returned with a small bottle of strained bananas. She sat in a chair next to her husband and began feeding him the baby food with a plastic Pokemon spoon. Once in a while she wiped Brian?s mouth with his bib. He seemed to spit up a lot and Julie slowly realized why. She involuntarily put her hand over her mouth. ?His teeth Ms. Baxter?He has no?? ?It was necessary. We had to make sure she couldn?t hurt anyone?or herself. As I?ve explained, she?s for all intents and purposes a baby. And babies don?t have teeth. They don?t need them any more than they need shoes.? She fed Brian another spoonful of the strained bananas. ?It?s not like she?s going to be eating any more steak or pizza, is it?? ?I guess that?s one way to lose weight,? Julie said. ?I mean, she?s so thin. I wish I looked like that.? ?Try it.? Sara held out the plastic spoon. Julie reached for it, but when it was obvious Sara wasn?t going to let go, she leaned forward and opened her mouth. She swallowed the sweet banana ?flavored custard. ?Mmmm not bad. It can?t be very healthy for her though.? ?It?s pretty nutritious. I give her special supplements and replacement hormones that take care of the rest. She?s actually healthier than she?s ever been. It?s true she hasn?t much strength left at all, but what does she have to do anymore? Oh, she?s so much better off this way. She never could take care of herself. Her doctor said she could give Brittney the body of a 16-year-old. Well, it looks like she did!? Sara laughed. ?Of course, surgery helped, too,? she continued. ?An injection, an implant, a snip here and there. It was all for the best. They removed a rib on each side and stapled her tummy. No more spare tire. She couldn?t overeat if she tried. She just spits up. See?? ?Wow. I?d give anything for a body like that.? ?Anything?? ?You know what I mean.? ?Yes, I do.? Brian seemed oblivious to what the two women were talking about. He was engrossed in the cartoon that Sara had put on the television. ?The Power Puff Girls are his favorite,? Sara explained. ?I remember when I couldn?t get him to watch anything but sports programs. Boy, that?s something I don?t miss.? ?It?s a cute show. My nieces watch it.? ?I understand you don?t see your family much?? ?No,? Julie said. ?I just have one sister. She lives across the country in Simi Valley. I see her once a year around Christmas.? ?Hmmm?? ?How did you know that, anyway?? ?Brian told me a little about you.? ?Really?? Julie had no idea that Brian had ever told his wife about her. She didn?t know what to think about that. How much did Sara know? What did Brian?s wife think of her? Again, Sara seemed to be anticipating her thoughts. ?He told me a little about you before his breakdown. He was really very fond of you.? ?Ms. Baxter, I?m sorry?I never meant..? Brian?s wife held up her hand. ?Oh please, it?s not important anymore. I?ve long since forgiven the both of you.? ?That?s very sweet of you, really. I appreciate. I?ve felt so guilty over what happened. If there?s anything I can do to make things up to you--? Sara smiled her sly smile again. Suddenly there was the sharp smell of urine in the air. ?Did baby Brittney wet herself?? Sara leaned over and felt the front of the diaper. ?She sure did.? Julie thought she had seen it all. She was stunned. ?You mean?? ?Of course,? his wife said. ?You don?t think she wears a diaper for nothing, do you?? She turned back to Brian. ?Does she have to do a poopy too?? Brittney looked wide-eyed at Sara. ?Come on sweetheart. Do a poopy for mommy. You know you have to. Don?t hold it back, just because we have company. It?s not healthy. Relax and let it happen. That?s it honey. Don?t be embarrassed. Julie, I think you scaring her. Try to be a little encouraging.? ?Come on?Brittney,? Julie said slowly, forcing a smile onto her face. ?Go, go to the..to the bathroom for?us.? ?A poopy,? Mrs. Baxter corrected. Julie nodded, ?Yes?a poopy Brian. Do a poopy.? She smiled again. Brittney seemed to relax a little?or maybe it was a sigh of resignation. For a moment Julie thought she saw a flash of desperation in the girl?s eyes. But just as soon as it appeared, it vanished. There was a burbling sound half-muffled by the diaper. ?Good girl,? Sara encouraged. ?Now just go. You know how good it feels when you go.? Brittney felt the inevitable urge to do a poopy take over. There was no stopping it. And a moment later she felt the soft warm poopy filled the diaper, oozing under the back of her thighs. Sara clapped in delight. ?Good girl!? she shouted. ?Now let?s change you into a nice clean nappy.? ?Does she know?? Julie whispered as Sara helped her baby husband out of the chair, his diaper sagging. Julie found herself calling Brian ?she? without a problem. After what she just saw, it was impossible to think of the girl in the high-chair as her old lover. ?I mean does she realize who she once was.? ?There?s no need to whisper. She can?t understand a word. Her language comprehension skills, outside of the most rudimentary communications, are almost nil. It?s amazing to think she used to write all those reports and speeches, isn?t it? A real manipulator of language, of lies. Now?? Brian said something in baby-talk, ?Eeesa ooona poopie poo poo.? The idea that her former lover should be reduced to this was almost incomprehensible. Julie watched as Sara set Brittney on the floor, took her by the slender painted hand, and walked her down the hall to the changing room to the change the soiled diaper hanging from the bottom of his mini-skirt. three Brian lay passively on the changing table, his skirt pulled up over his hips, as Sara removed the soiled diaper. He sucked his thumb contentedly as his wife wiped and powdered him. If any sense of shame remained in the feminized baby-hubbie, he didn?t show it. ?It was a little difficult at first,? Sara admitted. ?She didn?t want to admit her total dependence. But after so many accidents, she finally accepted the diaper. The first time?it was so hard for her to let go. She held it and held it. She fought it so hard, the little darling. But I gave her such a big enema and rubbed her tummy and told her it was okay. Oh, she was so sweet about it. After that first time, it just became easier and easier. Now she realizes there?s no point in being ashamed. She just can?t help it. She can?t expected to be hold it in. Can you honey?? ?I guess it must be a relief in a way,? Julie thought out loud. ?It's like the ultimate giving up of any responsibility.? ?Yes exactly,? Sara said. ?Imagine how wonderful it must be for her. No more worries about money, work, health, anything at all. She doesn?t even have to worry about going to the bathroom.? Brian?s wife laughed. She had a really pleasant, kind laugh, Julie thought. ?I guess that must be kind of a relief,? Julie admitted. She tried not to but she couldn?t help noticing Brian?s flaccid little penis. It was pale and hairless and no thicker around than Julie?s pinkie. Sara noticed her noticing. ?She?s much different there, isn?t she?? Julie nodded. She remembered how Brian?s large, thick penis had filled her. She remembered how she could barely take him in her mouth. She remembered cupping his heavy, cum-filled balls. Now? ?She didn?t need them anymore,? his wife said, ?And besides, they were so ugly. Her little pee-pee, though, I think its rather cute. Besides, she doesn?t need a vagina. What would she ever do with that? She has no sexual impulse at all. Do you sweetums?? Sara tickled Brian?s teeny weeny penis. It jiggled around impotently. He giggled. ?Go ahead,? Sara said. ?Touch it.? ?No?Ms. Baxter?I don?t?? ?Go ahead dear.? Julie reached down and touched Brian?s limp penis. She stroked its underside with her long red fingernail. Brian looked up at her, blinked his wide blue eyes, and smiled sweetly at the two women looking down at him in the nursery. Julie held the small unresponsive organ in her palm. She felt Brian softly pee on her hand. Four In the living room, over coffee, they sat and chatted. Brian sat on the floor, his legs splayed out in front of him, playing with his painted toes. ?Look,? Sara said. ?Remember how restless he used to be? Could you ever imagine him being so content.? ?No,? Julie admitted. She thought of how unsatisfied Brian had always been--with his marriage, with his job, even with her. ?He seems actually?happy now.? ?Of course. She has the simplest wants and desires. She?s so easy to please.? Julie thought of her own life, the difficulties, strains, the problems. ?He has someone to take care of his every need,? Sara said. ?Its not too bad a life.? ?No?? Julie said. What had seemed such a tragedy an hour or so ago, no longer seemed that way now. ?I guess not?? Julie realized that for some time now she had felt very much at ease. She was surprised that she should feel this way in the company of the wife of the man she was having an affair with. But Sara truly didn?t seem angry with her. And the way she acted made her husband?s bizarre transformation seem almost perfectly normal. At one point, Julie asked if she might use the bathroom. ?No,? Sara said. Julie looked at her curiously. ?No?? ?Not now darling.? ?Okay,? Julie said, somewhat confused. Instead of the bathroom, she accepted another cup of coffee. Sara handed her the refilled cup and sat back down in the chair opposite her. ?Is it a shock to see her like this?? ?It was at first,? Julie admitted. ?But I guess?well, you kind of get used to it.? ?You realize she?s not the man you used to know.? Julie nodded. ?He?s so gone. There?s nothing left of him.? ?She?s not a man at all.? Julie looked at the transformed baby-sissy on the floor. His dress, his diaper, his boobs, his long hair, his pouty lips, his toothless mouth, his tiny waist? She thought of the useless little bit of flesh she?d touched between his smooth thighs? He truly wasn?t a man, and wouldn?t be, ever again. ?No,? Julie admitted. ?He?s not a man. Brian continued playing with his toes, totally oblivious, as his wife and former mistress chatted on amiably about his lost manhood. five The room had grown darker. Julie heard a key in the front door and the sound of someone entering the house. She looked at Brian?s wife questioningly. ?That would be James.? A moment later a tall, goodlooking black man came stood in the doorway of the living room. His exquisitely tailored business suit showed off his chiseled frame. Julie forgot all about her feminized, diapered ex-lover sitting on the floor. She couldn?t help but give the handsome black man her sexiest smile. ?Dadda, dadda!? Brian cried excitedly. He had climbed to his feet and toddled across the room unsteadily. ?How?s my little one,? the black man said, lifting Brian up effortlessly, and kissing him on the mouth. Brian laughed and fussed and the black man carried him over to the sofa. He bent over, gave Sara a kiss, and sat down with Brian on his lap. ?Hello dear. This is Julie,? Brian?s wife said. ?Brittney?s little playmate.? ?Of course,? James said. ?Well, she?s a cute one, isn?t she?? Julie felt herself blushing. But if Sara took offense she didn?t show it. Instead, Brian?s wife said, ?Yes, I think they make a very sweet pair.? ?I don?t understand,? Julie said. ?I thought you said Brians? father?? ?I am Brittney?s father,? the black man said. ?Her foster father anyway.? ?Let me explain dear,? Sara said to James. She turned back to Julie. ?I wasn?t talking about Brian?s father before. Brian doesn?t exist anymore. He?s gotten a fresh start, so to speak. He?s been born again. It was Brittney?s father I was talking about. You see, James is my husband now. Of course, that makes him Brittney?s father.? ?You mean, legally?? Julie asked. ?Yes,? Sara said. ?It took some legal doing, but Brittney here, she?s a runaway. I took her in. She has no record, no memory, and she?s obviously somewhat developmentally?challenged. The adoption papers are being processed. Soon, she will be my daughter.? ?This is just so unbelievable?? Julie glanced over at Brian. Her ex-lover in his pretty little dress, the short skirt hiked way up, showing off his pretty white legs and puffy diaper. His tight-fitting, low-cut top made the most of his modest girlish breasts. He was a 35-year-old man with a 16-year-old body and a 3-year-old mind. God, Julie thought with a start, Brian was the perfect sex-kitten. Brian was sitting on the black man?s lap, his delicate painted fingers playing with James?s expensive silk tie, giggling as his ?daddy? bounced him up and down. ?Doesn?t he know?? ?Maybe she did at first,? Sara explained. ?It?s hard to know what goes on in their little minds. She fussed some and cried, but she got over it. Now she understands that sometimes mommy needs to be with grownups. It doesn?t mean I don?t love her; I just love her in a different way. And as you can see, she?s just crazy about James.? Brian was lying cuddled against the black man, his thumb in his mouth, while his ex-wife?s new husband absently fondled his plump rosy-white tits. Suddenly Julie understood. She didn?t have to ask what James got out of the unconventional arrangement or why he put up with having his wife?s ex-husband around. To think of her once successful, handsome lover turned into this?this sissified babydoll! To picture his soft, toothless, lipstick-painted mouth contentedly sucking a hard black cock. Or his skirt pulled up, his diaper bottom?Oh my god, Julie murmured, staring at Brian in fascination. Brian stared right back with wide, innocent-looking blue eyes. He had no idea, Julie thought, no idea whatsoever. Sara could read the comprehension in the younger woman?s eyes. She smiled. ?Yes,? Sara said. ?You really loved Brian, didn?t you?? It was the first time his wife had called Brian by his old name. But aside from that, Julie was thrown off-balance by the awkwardness of the question. After all, she was talking to her ex-lover?s wife. ?It?s okay,? Sara said, sensing Julie?s discomfort. ?You can say. It?s all over anyway.? ?Well yes,? Julie said hesitantly. ?I did.? To Julie?s surprise, Brian?s wife seemed genuinely happy. ?That makes what I?m going to ask so much easier.? ?I don?t understand, Mrs. Baxter?? ?I love Brittney too,? she went on. ?Very very much. And it?s so hard to trust her to just anyone. She?s such a special girl, as you can see. But sometimes, well, I just need a break. Do you know what I mean? What I was thinking is that maybe you could take care of her once in a while. Perhaps once or twice during the week, and sometimes on the weekends.? ?I?? ?It wouldn?t be much different than the way you were seeing her before. I mean, before she got like this. It wouldn?t be interfering with your life any more than that, I don?t imagine.? Julie looked again at her ex-lover sitting on the black man?s lap. She remembered him as he used to be, a strong, healthy, virile man. It was totally absurd to think that?she couldn?t possibly take care of him?of her?of whatever? ?Mrs. Baxter I can?t?I don?t know what to say, but I can?t do this?? ?I see,? Sara said. ?You mean that you loved him when he used to be Brian, but you don?t love him now?? ?No, that?s not it. Its just that I don?t think?it?s not the same. He?s not the same.? ?And I guess I should be the only one responsible for taking care of him now?? Julie was at a loss. ?You?re his wife,? she said in a small voice. ?Yes,? Sara said. ?You should have thought of that before. And so should have Brittney.? ?I don?t understand...You said you weren?t angry anymore, you said?? ?Oh, I?m not angry. I?m just getting even.? ?Mrs. Baxter?I think I should leave now?? Julie stood to go. ?Sit down?Juju.? Sara had spoken calmly and quietly. Julie knew she should leave; she wanted to leave, but something stopped her. It was that name that Brian?s ex-wife had used. Something about that name? Slowly Julie sat back down on the sofa. ?That?s better,? Sara said. ?Did you two really think I was going to let you get away with embarrassing me like that? Did you think I was going to let you steal him away?? ?But you said he had a breakdown, you said?? ?Oh he had a breakdown alright. I broke him down to what you see now?a baby that doesn?t know right from wrong, that doesn?t know what?s good for him, a baby that can?t think or do anything on her own, a baby that needs me, always, and that can never, ever leave.? ?You did this?on purpose!? ?Oh you are such a clever baby aren?t you? I can see we?re going to have to do a lot of shopping at Zany Brainy, James.? Julie shook her head, confused. ?I won?t say anything. I promise.? ?Oh isn't that sweet James,? Sara said. ?She doesn?t quite get it.? James smiled and looked up. He had had one of Brian?s hard little nipples between his teeth. He let the nipple go just long enough to say, ?Perhaps you should explain it to her. Simply.? ?Yes, I suppose I should,? Sara said, ?While she can still understand.? The two laughed. Julie felt frozen to the spot. She was terrified, horrified, she wanted to run, and yet something, something about it all? ?You?re going to have a little brain accident of your own sweetheart,? Sara said. ?You?ll change. Become more passive. More docile. You?re already like that, aren?t you? You?ll become more so. You?ll grow to love me and James as your mommy and daddy, just like Brittney.? ?You?ll never get away with this. They?ll look for me.? ?Not hard, I expect,? Sara said cooly. ?Who?s to care honey? You have no family, really. You?re just a silly junior assistant. If anyone comes here, they?ll find a very upscale, politically correct mixed race couple, doing their best to raise two mentally challenged orphans.? ?No!? Julie shouted. ?You?re crazy and I?m leaving right now. Where are my shoes?where?? ?Stay. Juju.? She started to get up, felt woozy, and sunk back down. Was she hallucinating or did James really have his hand down the back of Brian?s diaper, feeling up the baby sissy?s bottom? ?What have you done to me?what?? Sara looked at her with a delighted intensity. She had been waiting a long time for this moment. ?Brian installed the software on your computer, darling. He couldn?t help it. I dare say, he didn?t even know what it was. You see, he was under my power for the last month or so of your childish little fling. James, he wrote the software. It works subliminally, quick images of sexy adult babies, messages and reinforcements to get you to accept submissiveness, helplessness, defenselessness.? ?That?s impossi?? ?Getting harder to concentrate dear?? ??never get away??it?s like murder, its?? Julie couldn?t think of the words she needed. She felt a sense of panic. Brian was looking at her with blank eyes, his ?daddy? fondling his nipples and asshole. To her surprise and shock, tears started to roll down her cheeks. ?Oh don?t be such a crybaby Juju,? Sara said brightly. ?A few shots to breakdown your ego structure?it will be a relief for you. No more worrying about work, relationships, stealing other women?s boyfriend and husbands?? ??didn?t mean?anything?believe me?? Sara acted as if she hadn?t heard. ?You?re body will change, too. You?ll like that won?t you? You already said so. Some surgery to enlarge your breasts, reduce your waist, puff up your little pout. Why, by the time we?re done with you, no one will even recognize you. Everyone will think you are just another mindless little unfortunate that James and I have adopted.? ?Mrs. Baxter?please?? ?Call me momma.? ?I-umm--momma?momma?? ?That?s it honey. Slide onto the floor. Babies don?t sit on the couch.? ?momma?pweeze?momma?? Julie felt herself sliding onto the carpet. Her dress rode up, her panties showing, but she didn?t seem able to figure out how to cover herself back up. Soon she didn?t care. She tried to say something, something so complicated?. ?Small words baby, small words.? ?Momma doana ga momma?? ?It?s okay, sweetie, you?ll feel better before long. You are going to make a wonderful little twin sister to Brittney here. The two of you are going to be so cute together. Just think, now the two of you will be able to cuddle and sleep together whenever you want. No more sneaking around! Sex, of course, is out of the question. You?ve seen what we?ve done to Brian?s little pee-pee. We?ll fix you up, too. After all, babies don?t have sex.? Sara turned to a grinning James. He had put Brian down on the floor beside her. ?Honey, aren?t they just darling together?? Sara stood and James walked over from the sofa, drew her close, and kissed her. They stood, arms around each other?s waists, and smiled down with satisfaction at their two pretty adult baby sex slaves. ?This is going to be so good,? Sara said. ?So good.? James nodded, satisified. On the floor at their feet, Brittney was once again playing with her toes. Meanwhile, Juju was crawling across the carpet for the doorway. When she came to the child gate, she sat back on her bottom, stuck her thumb in her mouth and started crying. Sara and James watched with interest and laughed goodnaturedly at Juju?s frustration. ?Poor darling,? Sara said. Then she turned to James. ?You keep an eye on the babies, will you? I?m going to get Juju a diaper and some powder so she can make wee-wee. I think she?s ready for her first shot.?