The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)s6e10: Isla McNamee (34) free porn video

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Series 6, Episode 10: ISLA McNAMEE (34)

Fade in – we’re in a small lock-up garage – small and cramped, concrete floor, shelves and a workbench covered in motor-mechanics tools and parts. We’re not looking at any of that though – because between them and the camera, there is a woman bending backwards over an old motorcycle wearing nothing but a very brief bikini and a pair of high-heels.

She’s slim and healthy – strong limbs, flat belly, obviously fake boobs, with tanned flesh (and no tan-lines), and covered with a mass of tattoos ... Her loose blonde hair hangs down over her shoulders, parted to one side to highlight the dark roots – we suspect a style choice rather than a result of the lock-in.

Those boobs are really obviously fake – cheap bolt-ons, big scars on he underside from slicing her chest open and stuffing the saline bags inside. The scars have caused a slight twist to the boobs, the bottom half pulling slightly inward toward her sternum ... Not pretty, but filthy sexy!

But the fake tits are the biggest let-down about her ... That’s her face ... She’s not ugly, but she’s remarkably plain. An anonymous face you’d struggle to remember – thin lips, a pointy noise, dark eyes and a large forehead, with very smooth skin stretched over it. All the slutty make-up in the world can’t hide that she has a very forgettable face.

We hear her talking in voice-over as she poses – a strong Scottish accent, perhaps a little harsh.

“My name is Isla McNamee ... I’m 34, and I’m from Glasgow in Scotland.”

She stands and poses infront of the bike, then turns around to bend over it and present her narrow and firm behind to the camera...

“In my dreams, I’ve got like – two fantasies ... I always wanted to be a model...”

She switches position as her voice-over continues, standing up and posing beside the bike, one hand on the throttle as if she’s holding something phallic... “I’ve posed for some magazines ... I love bein’ in them ... Knowing that men are looking at me ... I’ve always been a bit of a show-off ... That’s what all the ink is about ... Giving men something to look at...”

We cut to a fast series of covers of a number of cheap and tacky looking magazines – tattoo magazines, motorcycle magazines, amateur photography magazines, reader’s wives style top shelf magazines ... Each of them with Isla’s picture, showing off her fake cleavage, her tattoos – with her legs apart. In the last image, from inside the top shelf magazine – we get the kind of view that would make her gynaecologist blush.

We get close ups of those tattoos as she poses and as we see stills from the various magazine layouts – both of her arms sleeved with snakes and dragons, meshed roses growing up the side of one thigh, a snake wraps itself around an ornate crucifix on her other, her belly appears to be a phoenix rising up from her pussy rather than from flames, her back is covered with a large pair of angels wings, the traditional tramp-stamp at the base of her narrow back, and on her backside, a perfectly rendered pair of lips ... It’s all extremely high-quality art – no colour bleed, all sharp lines.

She continues narrating, “I work in a tattoo parlour down in the city, but with everything that’s going on at the moment – We can’t even open the doors ... So I’m just spendin’ all my time at home, workin’ on ideas for the future...”

Then we’re watching her drawing - sitting forward over a coffee table, her loose t-shirt hanging down, big sleeves loose – we can see the side of her boob through the arm-wholes. We’ve just seen her modelling in the skimpiest of bikinis, and we’ve seen her pussy spread open, but this side-boob is all half our audience will be looking at right now ... Most will barely notice how fine her art-work is until we cut to the close-up...

We’re looking at the image of a woman on her hands and knees, with a mean looking, large toothed, Doberman on her back – her arse turned at an angle toward us, showing off the dog’s cock in her pussy, his knot stretching out her cunt, she’s looking back over her shoulder and winking at us. The drawing is stylised, like the pin-ups on the side of aircraft in World War II.

“My other fantasy ... Is dogs ... I’ve always drawn pictures of women with dogs ... Even when I was a wee girl ... Just silly cartoons – but the idea was always there. I used to like to show the pictures to my friends, like a joke – they never knew how much I loved the idea – they thought it was a joke, but I loved the comments they would make. The compliments ... I never thought I’d actually do it myself ... I’ve had chances before – had boyfriends wi’ dogs ... But they never asked, or I didn’t want to say anythin’ and risk losin’ ‘em if they didn’t approve ... So I never acted on my fantasies...”

Now she’s back in that bikini, sitting astride the bike, smooth thighs spread wide around the fat gas-tank ... Looking right into the camera. “But now I’m single ... And I’m bored ... And you’re here ... With your cameras ... And him...”

We pan down to look at a yellow Labrador – sitting on the floor of the garage, looking back up at us, dopey smile, tongue hanging out.

We hear the familiar voice of our hostess, Charley, and realise that she has been filming this ‘modelling’ session. “And what does that all mean?”

Isla looks back at us and manages a smile, “My name is Isla McNamee, and I’m a dirty Scottish whore, who wants to get fucked by a dog on the tele!”

She pauses for a moment, then Charley asks her, “Is it the dog, or the cameras that turn you on the most... ?”

Isla thinks for a second, then reaches up over her boobs, index finger hooking into the bikini string and pulling the cups of her top down and to the sides of her round tits, showing them off. She smiles extra wide, “I love to show off...”

We cut right to the image of Isla on her knees on the concrete floor, kneeling straight up from the knees, through her hips, up her back – making sure she keeps her shoulders back, her fake tits out and her belly in. Posing. Everything is about making her look her best. “I can’t wait for this to be on the tele ... For everyone to see...” She says as she raises her hands above her head, fingers running through her hair. Pouting. The raised arms make her boobs sit higher and wider apart – looking faker than ever, but still very attractive.

She gets a thumbs up from Charley, and smiles, settling down onto her heels – her firm arse resting between them as she reaches out with one hand to the side to stroke Thor’s back, and continues running the other through her long hair – fingers sliding through it and then letting it fall over her shoulder again - looking up at the camera the whole time – giving us that dumb blonde-girl pout again.

Charley calls from behind the camera, “Okay Isla, you’re looking very good ... But are you ready to look very bad?”

Isla cracks a little self-satisfied smile, but tries to stay sexy. “I can do this and still look good ... Trust me...”

“Oh, I think we’re all going to enjoy watching you prove that...” Comments Charley.

Isla smiles – she’s such an exhibitionist, the idea of everyone watching this appears to really get to her – the cameras seem to be making her wetter than the presence of the dog!

We cut to a few moments later, with Isla still on the floor, hands and knees well spread – a strangely wide stance we’ve barely seen on the show before today. Knees spread so wide her pussy is only a few inches off the floor, hands wide and elbows bent so that she’s almost doing a push-up. Her fake bolt-on tits almost reaching down to the floor. Head up and back, peroxide blonde hair all flicked to the side – away from the camera - exposing those dark roots again.

Thor is staggering around behind her, sniffing the floor as much as he’s sniffing her ... Seeming about as interested in the oil smells as he is in her pussy smells.

Isla turns to catch little glimpses of him, but mainly concentrates on maintaining the best angle for our cameras.

As usual for this series – Charley has got one high quality camera on a tripod, and a second hand-held GoPro. She’s not wearing his spectacles today, so the point-of-view camera is off. We switch between the two cameras as Charley walks around her guest, getting different angles of Isla’s hot body with the dog sniffing around behind her. Normally we’d focus more on the dog – but with the tone and shape of her, Isla is hard to ignore.

Then Thor decides it’s time for him to take centre stage ... Moving forward and almost pushing up over her firm buttocks, onto the base of her back, and slipping his front paws around her hips and jamming his crotch in between her thighs.

He’s pumping a little high over her pussy, his cock poking out and rubbing against the top of her arse ... So she angles backward, keeping her shoulders low, rocking her arse back and bending at the knees to raise her backside up to his belly – taking a little of his weight – and lining his cock up with her pussy...

“There ya go...” She says over her shoulder to the beast. “Go on and fuck me now...” She turns toward Charley, looking right into the camera and snarls, “Ya wanna see the beasty fuck the whore?” What she’s really snarling is ‘look at me, look at me!’ to all our viewers at home.

She takes her weight off one hand and drops that side onto her shoulder, bringing her arm down to her side, then her hand under her body and between her thighs – ready to catch/guide the dog’s cock into her pussy if he can get it close enough...

He continues to thrust at her, trying to lower his rear end as she angles hers up toward him ... Getting closer...

We cut to the hand-held camera to see his cock – poking out and beginning to grow larger, already big and hard enough to be ‘useful’, stabbing at her rear end – and her fingers stretching to make contact from below...

Then, as soon as he gets his angle right, edging his cock close-enough, she is able to catch it and steer it immediately to her pussy lips ... Pushing herself back just a little more and slipping the hard tip of his cock between them ... As he slips inside her we hear Isla moaning, “Oh fuck yeah ... Fuck that pussy... !” Making sure she says it loud enough for our microphones to pick up.

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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E01 Christina Bruce 42 from Belfast

With series 12 completed, we roll straight through into series 13 - the same hosts, doing the same things all over again ... Aren’t we getting bored of this yet? Well, it appears not ... So... We start this week’s show with establishing shots of quiet suburban streets – semi-detached homes, very middle class and safe... And then, stepping into frame from the side, moving from behind the camera to infront - this week’s host ... Still the nation’s least likely sex symbol – short, fat,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e10 Imogen

Series 4, Episode 10: IMOGEN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Then we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town - windy, cold and rainy,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e15 Donna Ferry 51

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – dropping all the way down to the North Sea, just off the coast ... Reaching sea level in a few seconds. From here we race toward the coast, between two piers, under a couple of bridges, and up a wide and winding river ... Under an old steel bridge, over a new concrete bridge, then deep inland ... At speed ......

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e8 Rosie

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home... Now we’re at a railway station, a big, clean and vibrant space. A sign on the wall reads ‘BIRMINGHAM NEW STREET’. It’s a large modern space, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e9 Shelly

Series 4, Episode 9: SHELLEY We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town. Out of season and on a windy, cold and rainy day, the place is virtually...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

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