The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)s7e9 - Rosemary Bramble (51) free porn video

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Series 7, Episode 9: Rosemary Bramble (51), from Canterbury

We fade up on the impressive façade of one of the oldest and most famous Churches in the United Kingdom. The huge limestone structure, with its Gothic style arches and spires, stands against a grey sky backdrop, but the dull weather isn’t keeping the tourists away – there’s many a history/church buff here, snapping away with their cameras and phones – and more than a few of them are taking an interest in our camera crew as we film the front of the church.

Then we see our subject for this week ... She’s a very pleasant, unthreatening, some would say plain looking middle-aged woman. Long, shiny dark brunette hair hangs down well over her narrow shoulders. She’s slim, with no particular shape to her – and her anonymous, casual clothing isn’t doing anything to enhance what little she’s got – but as she turns away from the cathedral and walks toward us, her smile is wide and genuine. She’s happy to be on camera...

She introduces herself with a bouncy, friendly, well-spoken accent, “Hello, I’m Rosemary Bramble. I’m 51, married, two children two grandchildren ... I’m a Health Visitor with Kent Community Health, and ... Well ... You know why I’m here...”

We cut to Rosemary’s interview – conducted INSIDE the cathedral, her sitting in one of the pews, our camera crew infront of her and to her side, filming from both angles. For the record, the security staff did check our filming permits, which stated that we were from the BBC, and were recording a segment for an upcoming show about faith. Looking at our guest, it’s not surprising they believed it.

In close-up, very relaxed and chatty... “This place is very special to me ... I was raised Church of England, but that isn’t saying much ... I was raised VERY Church of England, because daddy was a minister ... Not here, but not far away. I used to think that because we were just down the road he might be promoted to Archbishop and work here – he used to think that was so cute ... So, this place has special memories of my childhood...”

She pauses, thinking back... “When I was a little girl, I was a very good little girl ... I never went out with friends after school, I didn’t drink or smoke ... I didn’t even have a boyfriend until I went away to university ... But what I did have, was fantasy ... We never watched tv at home, we read books. Daddy loved history books and mummy loved fantasy books. I used to go into her bedside table and pick up whatever she had been reading and just sit on the bed and read that. Tolkien, Terry Brooks, Anne McCaffery...” She smiles at the memory.

“Then one day I found a book on her bedside table,” she continues, “And I start to read it, and it was different to the other books ... It was all werewolves and virgins ... Very sensual – very sexual ... Lots of scenes of wenches in taverns being used and abused by the tough men of the village ... Then there was a sequence where a man turns into a werewolf, and just as it looked like her was going to eat the girl, he raped her instead ... Well, not rape – but it certainly wasn’t ‘making love’ ... I read it over and over ... I was probably about 15 ... It was a real eye opener ... I absolutely adored it. I found it in the dustbin a few days later – mummy must have got to one of the ‘good bits’ and decided it wasn’t for her ... So I took it out and kept it for myself ... Then bought the author’s other books ... Which were all very similar, thankfully ... I looked for other books, but wasn’t sure where to start – you can’t exactly go to the library and ask the librarian which books include bestial love ... Years later, when the internet was in full swing I found hundreds of similar stories – beasts with young maidens ... Then I discovered actual dogsex stories ... Then videos ... My lord, my mind was blown ... And the feeling has been growing in me ever since.”

Telling the story takes years off her – smiling and animated she looks almost like a goofy schoolgirl for a moment. Then the smile wavers, and those years come racing back. “I’m here today because in the last few years I’ve lost both mummy and daddy, and at the same time I’ve become Granny Rose ... It’s all been a big shock to me ... I’ve gone from being the daughter, to the matriarch of the family. And to be perfectly honest – I don’t feel I lived enough of my own life to be the one with all the wisdom ... It doesn’t make any sense, I know, but I thought a perfect thing to do would be to fulfill my dreams before it’s too late ... And that’s why we’re here today ... To make my dreams come true...”

We cut to a wider shot of her with our film crew – the interview continuing. Then cut back to close-up as she moves onto another thought. “I’d love to do it right here ... Anywhere inside this place. It would be amazing ... The sound out it – hearing everything echoing back at me ... But, um, I’m sure we’d get kicked out as soon as things started – because I can be a bit noisy when I’m having fun...” She half blushes. “I don’t think we’d be here long before security arrived ... And I’m probably not pretty enough for them to want to just watch while I finish ... Ha ha...”

One of our technicians notes that, “We would be able to get a dog in here anyway...” and Rosemary reacts by putting one finger on her nose and pointing the other straight at him.

We cut to our alternate location, a quiet corner of a much smaller church – far less impressive. Unlike the Cathedral there’s nobody here other than Rosemary and our crew.

Rosemary is already stripped out of her boring outer layer of clothing, showing off her red body-stocking/bustier and panty combination, and black stockings. Her boobs are unimpressive, hidden away behind the bra section of the bustier, her belly and hips a little soft, legs looking good in the stocking though, she obviously keeps herself active.

She looks around, just to make sure no one is coming (she doesn’t know that we’ve paid the custodian to take the afternoon off, we’ve got the church all to ourselves for the afternoon), as she chat’s casually to our crew, not realising the cameras (and microphones) are on right now.

“Wolves, werewolves – are a turn-on ... So, something wolf-like would be nice, like a German Shepherd or a Husky ... But, I don’t really care what breed it is ... I like the big ones, but they’re a bit scary, aren’t they ... Scary is good though...” She laughs with the crew.

The main door to the church opens and sunlight floods in – backlighting the new arrivals ... A round man, and a lean dog ... The only thing missing is organ music to herald them, but the man does his bit to fill the silence, his booming, gruff voice echoing around the church. “Laaaaaa-deeez and gennlemen ... Please welcome the ‘Ound from ‘Ell ‘imself...”

They step forward and we get a better look – fat Cockney wide-boy, and sleek black Doberman – Dennis and Casanova (the third). Dennis delivers his herald like a practiced barrow-lad in a market, he’s been waiting for the chance to let rip with it again after being side-lined by Charley’s ego for his last few appearences.

He walks his boy down the aisle like a proud father on a wedding day, and Rosemary waits for them at the alter ... An embarrassed/excited little smile on her face. He continues talking as they approach, “It’s ‘is first time in the ‘ouse of the Lord, hopefully he don’t catch fire or explode ... Here to take your soul and your doggy virginity ... The one and only, Casanova the fird!”

As the man and his dog reach the alter, Rosemary crouches down to welcome them – well, the dog anyway ... Reaching out with both hands, wiggling her fingers as she waits to make contact. She’s smiling the whole time - a nervous ‘what’s-next’ look on her face rather than a ‘come-to-me’ expression as Dennis walks Casanova around her rather than right to her ... Closing in as she crouches, a little unbalanced as she tries to keep her eyes on the prize.

She talks to camera without looking up, “Well ... He’s a bit scary ... So ... Check that one off the list...” A nervous little laugh. “Doesn’t look like a wolf, but certainly some kind of scary monster from the darkness...” Another little laugh, reaching out as he is parade infront of her...

Dennis finally lets his pet close enough to the lady and she greets him with an unsure rub on the chest, the neck, and the sides – Casanova reacting almost as if he doesn’t want a big fuss. Turning away from each hand.

“Hello Casanova ... Hello ... This is all for you!” She says, keeping her ankles together but nervously letting her knees spread wide apart, opening her black stockinged and white flesh thighs, reaching down and pulling her red panties to the side to show him her hairy pussy and big pussy lips. He doesn’t appear to be particularly interested yet.

Dennis moves over and crouches down behind Casanova to join in with the stroking whilst interviewing our guest.

“‘andsome, isn’t he?” Dennis asks. More a boast than a question.

Rosemary answers, “He’s very handsome ... But ... I get the impression he’s not really that interested in me...” She says nervously. “Am I doing something wrong?”

“Noooo...” Dennis laughs, “Not yet, anyway ... He’s probly just a bit confused by this building ... The sound is funny, must be fucking wif ‘is ears... ‘e’ll settle daaan...” He keeps stroking the dog’s head and neck from behind whilst Rosemary strokes him from the front.

There doesn’t appear to be anything wrong with Rosemary, and she certainly didn’t smell bad on set. Definitely no worse than Dennis.

“So ... Is it the depravity the turns you on the most?” Dennis asks, taking his chance to ‘host’ a step further.

Our guest half blushes again, smiling and nodding a little. “Yes ... I think so ... Dogs have been a turn-on for a long time, but the idea of doing it in a church, behind my husband’s back ... All of that ... I’m such a ‘nice’ person – the idea of doing something that’s just totally disgusting ... It’s a massive turn-on. People watching me on television just being used...”

Dennis leans forward, reaching beyond the dog, “Let’s see if we can do something to raise his temperature ... And yours...” He takes her hand off the side of the dog and moves it down between her legs, placing the respectable little lady’s fingers over her pussy – and at the same time, leans in further to kiss her – mouth to mouth, Dennis’s cracked and full lips, whiskery face up against Rosemary’s nervous thin lips. She half smiles again just before they make contact – then reacts half with shock/disgust, and half with delight.

It’s not a passionate kiss, just a mood setter ... Dennis introducing his guest to depravity ... Want a beast? Want disgusting? Kiss a fat bloke before you fuck his dog ... Getting some juices flowing ... By the end of the kiss Rosemary’s smile seems a little more relaxed, and Casanova is suddenly beginning to show an interest in her exposed pussy. Sniffing at it and wagging his tail a little.

Dennis shows his guest how to stroke the dog’s belly, to grope his sheath and feel the shaft within. Teaching teacher her to wank it. Talking her through it as she alternates from looking at what she’s doing to the beast, to looking up at Dennis’s fat face, looking for approval from her ‘teacher’.

Every now and then Dennis will lean forward to plant another kiss on her thin lips, breaking off and giving the occasional wink to the camera to show that this is for show, he has no particular interest in this woman. He’s just degrading her more than the dog would ... As the process goes on, it’s Rosemary that starts to make the first move – leaning over to kiss him above his dog’s head.

Pretty soon Casanova is ready for action – and so is Rosemary ... Our host’s kisses have warmed her up, her pussy is wet, and she’s keen to get a cock inside her...

We cut to a wide shot of her, upright, on her hands ... Dropping the thin shoulder strings of her lingerie off to the side and allow the bustier to drop a little, then peeling it down over her little boobs. Still covering most of her belly and concealing a little pot-belly she was a little shy about.

She allows Dennis to reach over and squeeze her boobs, first one – then the other, as if he’s checking out fruit at the supermarket... “Small ones are more juicy...” He jokes, and she smiles again. Clearly simultaneously appalled and aroused by his rough touch.

Then she’s bending forward, onto her hands, those little titties hanging down, her belly sagging down a little (mostly obscured by the bustier pulled down around her middle), her behind in the air, her panties still pulled over to one side of her pussy – whilst Dennis positions the big Doberman behind her.

Casanova is certainly more interested now - still not exactly horny, but definitely showing signs ... So Dennis physically lifts his front end up, placing him on the smaller woman’s back, positioning his front legs on either side of the lady’s belly ... He settles there, making sure he gets a good grip on her, paws around her middle, belly against her arse...

“Oh gosh...” Gasps Rosemary, tensing up as reality kicks in, the idea of what she’s about to do really hitting home – and Dennis reaches in under the his pet’s hindlegs and takes hold of his shaft, pumping it a few times to get the tip of his famous cock exposed again – then aiming that tip for Rosemary’s pussy ... Slipping it inside then giving the beast another quick wank to get him started...

He warns her, “Okay, get ready for this...”

It takes three attempts, but on the third – with his cock poking out, pushed between the guest’s pussy lips, jerked off and started up like an old engine ... Then suddenly the beast takes control ... And the great lover is happily pumping his cock into Rosemary ... Pushing her forward, the immediate force of his thrusting forcing her to drop from her hands to her forearms.

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Series 4, Episode 7: SIOBHAN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Now we’re in the middle of a busy food-court - restaurants...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e1 Sammy Murty

We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e10 Alison Latham

Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E01 Christina Bruce 42 from Belfast

With series 12 completed, we roll straight through into series 13 - the same hosts, doing the same things all over again ... Aren’t we getting bored of this yet? Well, it appears not ... So... We start this week’s show with establishing shots of quiet suburban streets – semi-detached homes, very middle class and safe... And then, stepping into frame from the side, moving from behind the camera to infront - this week’s host ... Still the nation’s least likely sex symbol – short, fat,...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e10 Imogen

Series 4, Episode 10: IMOGEN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Then we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town - windy, cold and rainy,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e15 Donna Ferry 51

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – dropping all the way down to the North Sea, just off the coast ... Reaching sea level in a few seconds. From here we race toward the coast, between two piers, under a couple of bridges, and up a wide and winding river ... Under an old steel bridge, over a new concrete bridge, then deep inland ... At speed ......

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e8 Rosie

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home... Now we’re at a railway station, a big, clean and vibrant space. A sign on the wall reads ‘BIRMINGHAM NEW STREET’. It’s a large modern space, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e9 Shelly

Series 4, Episode 9: SHELLEY We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town. Out of season and on a windy, cold and rainy day, the place is virtually...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

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