The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)s4e7 - Siobhan free porn video

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Series 4, Episode 7: SIOBHAN

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags.

Now we’re in the middle of a busy food-court - restaurants and café’s feeding into a central open air collection of tables. Loud, confident, ‘creative’ types have loud, confident, creative conversations over lunch.

Charley walks between the tables, approaching our camera. None of the ‘creative types’ even bother to look up. Charley is wearing a smart-casual dress – it’s not cut particularly low at the front, but her cleavage is never not on show ... She smiles as she talks... “Welcome to the United Kingdom of Zoo. I’m Charley Ozvik, and I’m all over this great country of ours, looking for lucky ladies who need our help to live out their secret desires...”

The title, “THE UNITED KINGDOM OF ZOO” flashes up on screen over a graphic showing the UK, with little pins appearing, each pin representing a location we’ve either visited, or will be visiting in this series. Not for the first, or the last time, in this series, the pin is flashing right over London...

We’re back in the food court in Soho. Charley facing the camera, with a group of advertising types sitting behind her. 50/50 split of male and female, but it’s a blonde carefully positioned over Charley’s left shoulder that will be catching most of our viewer’s attention. Pretty, slim and young, with a big smile and moving around a lot.

Charley talks direct to camera. “I’m in our nation’s capital today, in the trendy Soho district, home to advertisers and pornographers ... Where could be more perfect for us? I’m here to meet a young lady who longs to be honest infront of the camera, instead of telling lies from behind it...”

We focus in onto the blonde over Charley’s shoulder. In simple terms, she is a gorgeous 30 year old. Almost too good to be true. Tall and slim – she wears a tight business skirt and a blouse that is neatly tailored to show off her excellent figure. She also owns a set of the whitest teeth a dentist can give you.

Siobhan speaks in voice-over with a plummy “daddy’s-got-me-a-Porsche” accent. A spoiled school-girl all grown up, as we watch her talking and eating with her co-workers, all of whom are oblivious as to why we are filming.

“My name is Siobhan Venison. I’m a 30 year old creative consultant at a boutique advertising agency in Soho ... And I’m not happy unless I have everything I want ... Today, I want to be a very very naughty girl!”

We cut to a narrow back lane, just a couple of minutes away from the food-court. We’ve met up with Siobhan so she can talk freely to us. Charley interviews her – both woman standing side by side. Siobhan is slimmer than Charley, but Charley has the curves. Siobhan with long straight blonde hair, whilst Charley’s is jet black with a natural wave. One thing to watch out for – not immediately obvious to casual viewers, is that our host is trying to cover up her teeth during the interview due to her insecurities about whether they are white enough next to this white toothed babe.

“So, Siobhan, what first turned you on about bestiality?”

“Oh, well, true story ... I went to an old girl’s reunion, our tenth, or year or two ago – and we all had a great time talking about the old days, and the old girls - especially the ones who weren’t there – and someone started telling a story about a girl called Philippa who was staying away because she had apparently been caught having sex with one of her husband’s gundogs. Everyone said they were disgusted, but no-one seemed to want to move the conversation on. I listened to all of their opinions and jokes, but all I could think about was Philippa under that dog ... Then I realised I wasn’t thinking about Philippa as much as I was thinking about the dog. A big, ugly, dumb animal ... Just fucking the living daylights out of Philippa, who was a skinny little girl throughout school ... I’ve no idea what she looks like now.”

“And how long have you wanted to be with a dog yourself?”

“Oh, almost immediately that I had those thoughts about the dog on Philippa ... It was like, he’s on Philippa ... What’s so special about Philippa? I’m hotter than Philippa ... He’d be much better off with me ... I’d give him a much better time. She was boring and ugly – I’m hot and funny...”

Although she hasn’t said anything funny yet, it’s very easy to believe that she is – and there’s no arguing about the ‘hot’ comment. She is. Flipping her long blonde hair, flashing her white teeth, speaking with that perfect public schoolgirl accent. You could easily picture her at St Trinnian’s, tight blouse, short skirt and stockings and a hockey stick at the ready.

“What’s your sex life usually like... ? What are you into when you’re not thinking about dogs?” Asks Charley, closing her mouth as soon as she’s finished asking the question. Smiling with her lips pursed as Siobhan answers.

“Well, I have to admit – or maybe boast, I suppose – that I’ve always had a pretty good sex life. I’ve dabbled with lesbianism because women are so much nicer to look at, and to touch, than men – but I could never get away from the fact that a woman doesn’t have a cock! Dildos are fun, but they aren’t cocks. And I likes cocks.”

The word ‘cock’ pouring out of her mouth doesn’t sound filthy at all.

“But a doggy DOES have a cock...” Adds Charley.

“Absolutely, yes ... And from I’ve seen on your show, quite a large one ... So long as they know how to use it, I think it would be a lot of fun.”

Charley is almost flirting now... “You’re possibly the most attractive woman we’ve had on the show so far ... Many people would ask why you would be attracted to something which you describe yourself as ‘ugly’?”

“Well, that’s the point, isn’t it? It’s ugly and disgusting. It’s beneath me. I shouldn’t have to do it – but I want to do it ... I want to be seen being as dirty as possible. I’m not little Miss Perfect. I’m my own person. I’m independent and I’ll do as I please. And right now, it pleases me to imagine having a dog on my back...”

“What turns you on about having sex with a dog?”

“I think it’s just the depravity of it. I don’t know if I’ll enjoy it itself ... I like the concept though. Big ugly dog on a little sexy lady ... It’ll look fantastic even if it doesn’t feel too good!”

“Does anyone else know about your fantasy?”

“I think most of my friends know about it ... Some of the boys at the agency ... I told them and I know most of them went off the toilet to have a wank thinking about me doing it ... I quite like that to be honest. Controlling them. I’m the opposite of #metoo!”

“If today goes well, will this change your life?”

“I don’t think so ... I’m already a bitch ... Ha ha ... I’ll just be a real bitch once I’ve been with a dog!” She laughs at herself, lips pulling back from white teeth. Charley smiles, flashing her own imperfect teeth, then covers them up again, closing her lips.

In a cramped and cheap hotel room not too far from that Soho Food Court, we’ve pushed the double bed across the room and up against the wall to try and give us a bit more space, but it’s still tight in here. The room would pass a health inspection, probably, but there’s no way a woman like Siobhan should be in a room like this ... To be fair, she appears to find the room as amusing as it is cheap.

She’s stripping off her blouse to reveal a strapless black bra containing two neat little mounds of prime breast and the flattest stomach we’ve seen for a while. She looks like she’s a couple of workouts from having a visible six-pack. Then the business skirt comes off, unzipped at the side and dropped to the floor to show off a black g-string that matches the bra for simplicity and style, and black hold up stockings that grip firmly to her long slim thighs. She’s still wearing her three inch heels.

She pauses for a second so we can take in her figure – it’s worth taking in and she knows it... “Keep going?” She asks.

“Yes please ... Don’t let me stop you...” Jokes Charley.

She peels off her panties next, taking the corners and sliding them down her thighs – the gusset noticeably sticking to her pussy. She’s neatly waxed down there, not a hair in sight. She has one of those very tidy vaginas – everything tucked away neatly.

Charley can’t resist commenting, “Oh I’d kill to have a cunt as neat as yours!”

“Ask nicely and maybe I’ll let you have it...” Jokes Siobhan with a little laugh as she reaches around behind her back and unhooks her bra, letting it fall away with barely any change to the position of her boobs. They aren’t big, but they are natural and firm, with pointy little nipples and large pink areola.

“Can we have a twirl?” Asks Charley – more for herself than for the cameras. As Siobhan performs a cute little shuffling twirl to show off her near perfect pert bottom, narrow back, etc. Charley turns to camera, speaking to the camera-man rather than the camera, “She looked good in her pictures but this is ridiculous!”

From across the room, Siobhan talks over Charley, with a big smile... “We seem to be one doggy short of a good time!”

Then we’re outside in the street, watching one man and his dog approaching. Thomas, a middle-aged, happy looking chap is whistling to himself as he approaches – his dog, Randall, is a tan pitbull and is pulling hard on his chain, obviously keen to get wherever he’s going. Thomas waves to someone as he turns and lets the dog lead him up the steps to the door of a cheap looking hotel.

Inside the hotel, we follow Thomas and Randall as they make their way through reception, along a corridor, up a small staircase, and up to a doorway. As Thomas reaches to the door handle, we cut back into the room.

Siobham looks very happy to see Randall – and Thomas looks pretty impressed with Siobhan’s slim form too as he introduces the lovers to one another.

“This is Randall. He’s a 6 year old American Pitbull, and we’ve come all the way from Watford today just so he can meet you! He’s a randy little bugger, and to be honest, I can’t wait to see what he does to you!”

Siobhan crouches down to welcome him, saying, “He’s a lovely boy ... I can’t wait to see what he does to me either!”

Thomas releases Randall from his chain and the dog immediately rushes to Siobhan who wastes no time getting to know him - rubbing his flanks and belly, not hesitating to slip her hands under his belly to fondle his sheath ... And as she fondles him, she continues to talk to us. “He’s a solid little chap, isn’t it?” She gasps as she feels his muscles, then, “And I think he’s pretty solid all over, oooohhhh!” as she fondles his sheath, feeling the beginnings of his erect shaft within.

Charley moves in between Thomas and Siobhan, effectively pushing Randall’s owner out of frame and taking over the assistant duties. Thomas doesn’t seem too upset, taking a couple of steps back so that he can watch this sexy brunette with her fake boobs and tight clothes, help the naked (save for stockings and high heels), slim and toned blonde with his dog.

Charley drops down into a crouch behind Randall so that she is roughly at Siobhan’s eye level to continue the interview, with nothing but the horny musclebound pitbull between them. “So now that you’ve seen your next lover ... How do you feel about the shape of things to come?” She asks, offering the microphone to the beautiful blonde for her answer.

Siobhan continues to rub and fondle the dog’s sheath under his belly, the dog snuffling and panting but doing absolutely nothing to stop her. “I think I’ve made the right decision ... I can’t wait to have this little chap pumping into me ... I’ve seen a couple of his performances and he certainly looks capable...” She says, adding “And feels capable...” with a very pretty and wide smile.

“Are you ready to get started?” Asks Charley, swinging the microphone back to her beautiful guest.

“I think I already have...” Smirks Siobhan as she shifts position a little to afford our cameras a look under the dog’s belly where we can see a couple of inches of hard doggy cock poking out of the pitbull’s sheath, glistening with the promise of bestial delight...

Charley suggests that Siobhan take up the position right now and let’s the dog get started. “No point wasting a nice erection like that...”

Siobhan smiles, clearly agreeing with her, and assumes the position – down on her hands and knees, back arched toward the floor, her slim little arse pushed up and back. She moves her knees apart until her rear end is at the right height for Randall to make his entrance.

Charley can’t resist giving Siobhan a sharp smack on the backside, leaving her hand on her guest’s flesh for a second, before looking over at the dog and encouraging him with a couple more pats (which are more like smacks). “Come on boy, come and get it while it’s hot...”

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Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E01 Christina Bruce 42 from Belfast

With series 12 completed, we roll straight through into series 13 - the same hosts, doing the same things all over again ... Aren’t we getting bored of this yet? Well, it appears not ... So... We start this week’s show with establishing shots of quiet suburban streets – semi-detached homes, very middle class and safe... And then, stepping into frame from the side, moving from behind the camera to infront - this week’s host ... Still the nation’s least likely sex symbol – short, fat,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e10 Imogen

Series 4, Episode 10: IMOGEN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Then we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town - windy, cold and rainy,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e15 Donna Ferry 51

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – dropping all the way down to the North Sea, just off the coast ... Reaching sea level in a few seconds. From here we race toward the coast, between two piers, under a couple of bridges, and up a wide and winding river ... Under an old steel bridge, over a new concrete bridge, then deep inland ... At speed ......

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e8 Rosie

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home... Now we’re at a railway station, a big, clean and vibrant space. A sign on the wall reads ‘BIRMINGHAM NEW STREET’. It’s a large modern space, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e9 Shelly

Series 4, Episode 9: SHELLEY We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town. Out of season and on a windy, cold and rainy day, the place is virtually...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e18 Sylvia Distin 55 from Chelmsford

We’re cruising along a wide and quiet suburban street. Green lawns stretch back from the pavement to the nice semi-detached homes. There’s a slim woman walking a large dog along the side of the road, and we pan around to look at her as we pass – it’s no-one we know, but we kind of wish we did! Then we’re looking forward again – seeing an intersection infront of us ... Then pulling up, looking out of the side window right at a single story, flat-roofed building. A sign outside reads,...

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