The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)s12e06: April Cisse (55) From Walthamstowe free porn video

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We start this week’s show with establishing shots of an old factory unit - wide, two floors high, without windows ... Moving along the anonymous walls until we come to a sign that reads, “GOD’S JUNKYARD”.

We cut to inside, and find ourselves in a very funky art-space. Displays of large neon signs. The signs themselves forming the aisles that customers/admirers walk up and down. We move toward the end of one of the aisles, and find ourselves face-to-face with a familiar bald head and hairy round face...

It’s everyone’s favourite Cockney wide-boy ... Dennis Baxter ... Waiting for us in a pair of baggy jeans and a West Ham football top that clings to his beer belly and man-boobs. He looks completely out of place in the gallery.

He speaks in his regular, gravelly Cockney accent, “Hi ... I’m Dennis Baxter, and this – is ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ ... This week, we’re in the nation’s capital, God’s own London town, to meet a lady who represents all the best elements of class, sophistication, elegance, beauty and, of course, perversion...”

We cut to watch an older lady approaching, dressed in layers of loose clothing, very bohemian – we can’t see her body, but from the way her clothes hang we can guess she’s in reasonable shape. Her hair is light on top, dark underneath, loose but styled. Her features sharp, mouth wide. She’s neither attractive nor unattractive.

Then we’re looking at the two of them standing together, facing the camera but turned in to face each other. Our classy, feminine guest opposite our fat, slobby host. She appears to find talking to him almost distasteful, but oozes confidence as she introduces herself in an educated, classy tone, drawing out some of the words in that lazy way ‘posh’ ladies often do. “Good eeeeeevening. My naaaaame is April Cisse.” She pronounces it ‘See-say’. “I’m 55 yaaaars old, I’m from Luuuuundon, and I’ve been denyyyyying who I reeeeeally am for decades.”

Dennis begins the interview proper, “So ... Tell me a story ... How does a classy, artistic lady like you end up on a squalid, dirty little show, with a fat cunt like me?”

April doesn’t appear the slightest bit shy about her confessions... “Well, I’ve aaaaalways been a little ‘out there’, really ... I come from a very wealthy familyyyy, and I suppose I’m something of the black sheep, even if I am – arguablyyyyy – the most successful...”

As she continues we cut away from her to see Dennis as he nods as if he gives a fuck what she’s saying, “My parents, my brothers, and my sister are all legal eagles ... All working in financial laaaw, in the City, but I always gravitated toward the aaaart world...”

Back to April. “I’ve been buying and selling art, and operating galleries, since the early eighties ... I indulged my love in art, and I indulged many of my aaaartists ... I’ve always been paaaaartial to experimentation, and frankly, I don’t see anything wrong with trying anything I fancaaayyyyyy.”

“And you fancaaaaay dogs?” Dennis interrupts, dropping his Cockney accent as much as he can for a second as she attempts to copy her guest’s vocal mannerism.

April pauses, as if offended that she’s been interrupted. “Well, of coooouurse ... I ‘fancy’ all of the bestial arts ... I think that it’s one of the most under-rated visuals in the world ... The sight of a woman, in all her natural gloooorrryyy, doing the most natural, yet un-natural acts in the world – flesh again furrrr, sophistication against animal instinct ... With the right lady, and the right animal, it really is an aaaartisitc statement...”

We can’t argue with a word she says. It’s the basis of our whole show!

“And are you the right lady?” Asks Dennis.

April looks at him like he’s an idiot. “Oh good Lord, no ... I’iiiim just a lady who wants to experience the act, so that I can appreeeciate the aaart from a newwww perspective.”

Our host looks genuinely confused, this is high concept for a boy from the East End. “So this is about the art rather than the sex?”

“My dear boy...” April’s tone is becoming super condescending. “ ... The sex IS the art ... Of course I’m here for the sex ... By having the sex myself, I will be able to appreeeeciate watching the sex more effectively...

Don’t you find you enjoy watching videos more since you started doing this?”

Dennis cocks his head to the side as he thinks, pantomiming the thought process, and then agrees, “Yeah, I suppose I do ... Now I know what’s really going on, I get how they’re reacting ... I see what you’re saying now.”

“Well, there you go ... Well done.” Condescends our smirking guest...

We cut to the gallery, a little later, the patrons and staff having departed – and our guest standing on her own infront of the camera, already beginning to remove her clothes ... Pulling layers up over her head, gradually revealing her body to the viewers and our crew.

She’s slim, with smallish boobs that are well spaced on her chest, her ribs stick out a little. She removes her front fastening bra, unclipping it and opening wide, letting those tits drop an inch ... Then her panties - pulling them out and over her hips – showing off her trimmed pussy - and then letting them drop down her slim legs to the floor.

Hands on hips, looking into our camera ... Naked, full frontal, and confident ... She looks her age, but still good.

There’s a short pause, then Dennis’s big Doberman Pincher, Casanova (the Third), bounces into the scene ... He’s had to sit off camera, watching April undressing, and he’s not a patient boy ... He’s full of energy, wound up and ready to rock as he winds around her legs and sniffs at her pussy.

April stares down at him, a wry smile as she watches him bounce around and sniff at her ... The more he fusses, the more amused she looks. After a while she looks up at the camera, then to the side at Dennis, and checks, “What do you have me do?”

We hear Dennis from off camera, “You’re the artist ... Make the art however you wish...”

We cut to a shot of April, now on her knees, facing away from our main camera, showing off an old but firm arse – beginning to bend forward, the crack of her arse opening a little to show off her tight little brown arsehole, then as her hands make contact with the polished concrete floor, crawling around to side-on – taking up a perfect doggy-position on her hands and knees. Old tits smallish, but still with enough weight to hang down and move as she does – her belly firm for an older lady, but with a bit of sag, Her arms and legs looking fine ... Raising her head to look straight forward, then holding the pose – as if she’s trying to be a part of the exhibit in her own gallery. Then ordering, politely, “Release the dog, please...”

To the side of the shot, Dennis is hunched forward, holding Casanova’s collar – he gives his boy one last pep talk. “Make it a good one...” and then releases him.

The big Doberman hurries right to the old slut’s rear end – sniffing and licking at her arse-crack – making her lean forward slightly - struggling to not react. She’s clearly set her mind to staying still and letting the dog use her ... He’s the paint, she’s the canvas...

He digs in – licking hard and fast, swiping his big wide tongue up through her arse-crack, over her arsehole, then starting against -over her pussy, up her crack ... Long, hot, wet strokes...

April may have aimed to remain still, but we can see that she’s already bending her back forward, pushing her belly toward the floor so that he pussy is pushed back between her thighs, being presented to the beast- who continues to lick, catching more of her hot snatch with every stroke. Making her arch her back a little more each time.

He twists his head from side to side, moving closer, slotting his tongue deeper and deeper into the old slut ... The deeper he goes the wider she lets her mouth hang open – still resisting the temptation to moan or cry out, just enjoying that warm, wet, slimy feeling of the long tongue sliding in and out of her snatch. Arching her back even further – and then, as the pleasure becomes almost too frustrating, pulling her behind forward, arching her back up instead of down...

Which Casanova takes as a signal ... Raising his head above her arse, pushing forward, up and over her, grabbing around her hips with his front legs, and pulling himself over and onto her back.

“OOOooohhh!” She gasps, losing control for a second as a moment of panic hits her – this is happening ... This is real ... She’s about to be fucked by a dog...

The big Doberman begins to stab at her rear-end – jerking at her, thrusting in short, sharp, bursts. Looking for his target, looking for that hole ... Hindpaws skipping around behind her legs, claws hitting the back of her calves, scraping over one, resting on the other.

His weight is on her back, pushing down on her, his legs around her, powering his weight into her. Thumping at her ... The tip of his cock poking against her pussy lips...

Shocked by the first contact, she jerks her hips forward, taking herself just out of his range ... But the dog follows her, hindpaws scraping forward on the smooth floor – looking for grip – his hindquarters still bending toward him, belly wrapping around her back, pulling up closer ... And then...

“OOoohhhhh!” She gasps, again – louder this time, more shock than panic as the beast begins to hammer into her – fast and nasty. Pushing deep, forcing himself into her flesh. His cock growing as he thrusts.

She’s obviously still trying to control her reactions, only occasionally letting out a sound when the dog hits her particularly hard, or at a bad angle ... The rest of the time she’s quiet, teeth together, breathing through it...

We move to a side-angle where we can truly appreciate what’s infront of us ... This older, classy, intelligent lady – full of herself before the scene began, but now full of dog-cock ... Her titties jiggling under her as she holds that four-point doggy stance ... The black dog on her back, almost as big as her, dominating her, pumping at her - pumping into her ... His arse moving so fast that it’s a blur – driving his cock in and out of her old snatch.

We cut to a behind-the-scenes shot, watching Dennis standing back amongst the camera-crew, arms folded across his chest, a slight smile. Proud as he watches HIS dog fuck the old slut, rather than simply enjoying watching an old slut being fucked by a dog ... We hear him making an off-microphone comment to one of the crew. “He’ll tie in a second...” – and that crewmember moves forward, dropping down beside them, reaching in under her belly, looking back and up between her thighs...

We cut to the low-angle camera ... Because of the angle of April’s body, her belly and mons pubis are hiding the actual penetration shot – but we can see the way her flesh is being shaken around, her belly is small, but a little loose, so jiggles just like her boobs – and back beyond her, we can see his balls shaking and swinging too.

Back to the wide-angle, the cameraman between us and the action – altering his position so he can reach forward, pushing the camera down lower, between her thighs – then back to the close-up again...

Looking up at her cunt as the cock rattles in and out. Shiny and fat. Drops of watery cum forming around her labia ... Gathering at the lowest point, and dripping from her flesh down past the camera.

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Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e18 Sylvia Distin 55 from Chelmsford

We’re cruising along a wide and quiet suburban street. Green lawns stretch back from the pavement to the nice semi-detached homes. There’s a slim woman walking a large dog along the side of the road, and we pan around to look at her as we pass – it’s no-one we know, but we kind of wish we did! Then we’re looking forward again – seeing an intersection infront of us ... Then pulling up, looking out of the side window right at a single story, flat-roofed building. A sign outside reads,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e10 Imogen

Series 4, Episode 10: IMOGEN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Then we’re on the windswept sea-front of an old fashioned English resort town - windy, cold and rainy,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e15 Donna Ferry 51

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – dropping all the way down to the North Sea, just off the coast ... Reaching sea level in a few seconds. From here we race toward the coast, between two piers, under a couple of bridges, and up a wide and winding river ... Under an old steel bridge, over a new concrete bridge, then deep inland ... At speed ......

2 years ago
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  • 15
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e8 Rosie

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home... Now we’re at a railway station, a big, clean and vibrant space. A sign on the wall reads ‘BIRMINGHAM NEW STREET’. It’s a large modern space, with...

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