The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)S10:E08: Sophia Brayson (35) From Luton, And Gina Howey (31) From Newcastle. free porn video

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We fade in on our regular set – the rusty old bedstead, with the ratty stained mattress, set on a concrete floor in the middle of a dark studio, harshly lit from above by a single spotlight.

The bed looks a little different to previous times we’ve seen it, because one end (the foot-end), and its legs, have been removed, leaving a sloping bedframe and mattress. There’s no explanation for the missing ‘footer’ from the bed.

There’s a brief pause – then we hear footsteps approaching. Heels clicking on concrete, we look around in the direction the sound is coming from and we see...

An attractive, young to middle-age woman – the kind who would fit comfortably in the yummy-mummy category if you saw her at the school drop off. She has long blonde streaked hair, tied up behind her head, with a loose fringe swept to one side – her body is slim but not skinny, with a flat belly - clothed in a white lacy bra and suspender belt set, plus white panties and stockings. The bra is filled with what look to be a nice B-cup’s worth of soft boob flesh.

She looks down at the floor as she comes to a halt on her mark, then looks up into camera and introduces herself in a bright, polite, and friendly southern accent.

“Hello, my name is Sophia Brayson ... I’m 35, and I’m a proud wife and mother, from Pepperstock, just outside Luton ... And I’m here to fulfill my sexy little fantasy ... I’m not a lesbian, but I’ve always wanted to have sex with another woman, whilst sharing an animal ... I just think the idea of sharing a dirty, ugly animal, with a beautiful – hopefully clean, woman, is the most erotic thought in the world.”

In close up we can see that she’s quite pretty, with thin lips, narrow features, high cheekbones and the bluest blue eyes.

So, she’s got an 8/10 body, and an 8 out of 10 face ... She’s not far off being model pretty.

We hold on this image for a second, with Sophia looking a little nervous/hopeful ... Then we hear more footsteps – and see our guest turning to see who’s making them ... Then turn our camera toward the side of the set again to see...

A woman – a little younger than Sophia, and not quite so toned, with D-cup boobs filling out an unfussy black bra, a slim, but not flat belly, then black bikini brief panties across her wide but shapely behind. Her dark hair is tied back into the long ponytail.

She’s a solid 7, possibly even an 8 in the physique column – her rating pushed up by those shapely round boobs.

After clicking over to within a couple of meters of Sophia and then stopping on her mark, she flashes a wide grin at her co-star, then looks up into camera. We note that she’s not as pretty as Sophia, with a girl-next-door type face – not unattractive you understand, just not a head-turner. A 6 out of 10. She introduces herself in a loud and confident Geordie accent.

“Hello, I’m Gina Howey ... I’m a happily divorced, single parent, from Newcastle-upon-Tyne ... And - I’m 31-year-old today...”

Before she can continue, we hear Sophia say, “Happy birthday” from just off camera, and note Gina giving her another quick smile and a “Cheers”, before continuing... “I’ve been fantasizing about having sex with a pig for years, but I’m o’wer nervous about doin’ it alone, like ... So I’m keen to try it with someone else first time up ... Preferably someone like me who’s never done it before!”

They exchange greetings, “Hello” and “Hi”, and then...

We cut to a wider angle, a moment later, with the two women standing side-by-side. Close enough to touch, but not touching. They appear excited but nervous about almost everything they say and every move each other makes.

Geordie Gina starts us off, talking to Sophia rather than the camera. “So are you into girls as well as pigs, or just pigs?”

“Pigs ... Well, all animals actually, but I’ve always thought it might be fun to be with a girl...” Sophia answers.

“You’ve never tried it?” Checks Gina.

“Not with a woman, no ... Or an animal, of course.”

Gina pushes on, “How long have you been turned on by pigs?”

“Well, like I said, it’s all animals really ... I’d like to have sex with a dog, or even something bigger, like a horse ... But pigs seem to be the, erm ... Dirtiest.” She half blushes, whilst Gina smiles and nods. “And it’s doing something dirty that really turns me on.”

“I know ... I know...” Agrees Gina. “I’m the same ... Pigs are just so fuckin’ filthy ... The idea of having one of them on my back, with his long skinny cock stuffed up in my cunny ... It just makes me so fuckin’ horny!” She leans in closer to Sophia, “Have you seen a piggy cock? Yeah ... Disgusting, aren’t they...?”

Both girls laugh at the mutual memory of watching pig’s cocks of video. Gina holding out one long finger and making it wriggle as if it was a pig’s cock ... Regular viewers will recognise it – even if her finger is far too short and fat to genuinely represent a porcine member!

Sophia offers some more information. “I used to have fantasies about dogs ... It’s only when I saw the pigs on this show that I realised how sexy they are...”

Gina nods, “Yeah ... Yeah ... I think my favourite thing about pigs is how much they cum ... I saw a trivia thing years ago that said they cum, like, a pint ... And I love cum ... I just want to get filled up to the brim with that hot spunk!”

They pause for a second, excited by their shared fantasy, and breathing hard. Not too far apart. Flashing half nervous smiles at each other.

Gina breaks the silence... “And ... You wanted to have some lezzie action at the same time...?”

Sophia smiles again, leaning in a little closer, “I just think it makes it a bit sexier ... You know ... Sharing the perversion ... That soft ... Sexy ... Smooth ... Feminine thing ... Along with the ugly pig!” On each pause, she leans a little bit closer – just inches away from Gina’s face now...

Gina breaks the sexy mood with a sharp, “I just wanna watch a pig fucking another slut, right before it fucks me ... Can I watch a pig fucking you?” She leans a bit closer still...

Sophia edges so close that their lips are almost touching... “You can watch it right up close ... So close you can smell it ... And ... Taste it...” And then their lips come together, mouths opening, locking together with the kind of passion only the promise of bestiality can inspire in a slut!

We watch as Gina pushes Sophia back onto the bed, leaning down over her, their lips barely pulling apart as they gasp to each other, “I’m so fucking horny!” – “I can’t believe we’re doing this...” – “The lesbian thing or the pig thing?” – “Both ... Either...” – it’s so hushed and breathy that it’s hard to tell who is saying what as they reach around each other’s backs and unhook bras, pulling them away – exposing boobs, feeling each other, pinching and pulling on each other’s nipples ... Kissing all the time, tongues sweeping around lips and in and out of mouths.

As they go to town on each other, as much as we’d like to keep watching, we pan away – and look over to the door to the loading dock ... And see the huge, round, ugly figure of our prize boar Winston, waddling toward us. We can hear him breath almost before we hear his trotters on the concrete.

Back to our first-time lesbians – still lost in sucking face, grabbing flesh, and swapping comments, “I can’t wait to see you fuck a pig!”, “I want to taste his piggy spunk from your cunt!” – and then they suddenly peel away from each other, turning around on the bed to look at the approaching fat beast.

Gina’s loud voice is unmistakable, “Oh ... My ... Fucking ... God! It’s huge!”

Sophia’s face lights up, she adds, “He’s as ugly as I hoped he’d be...”

Cut to a close-up of Winston as he stumbles onward toward his sows ... His breath rasping, a line of drool beginning to hang down from his hideous jaw. He’s so loud and ugly that we can almost smell him...

“And he stinks too!” Sophia adds.

“Yeaahhhh!” Celebrates Gina, as if this is a dream come true.

They both admire the heavy, pink, bristly bulk of Winston, the prize pig, as he waddles toward them them. “Ohhh God!” Exclaims Gina, gradually losing her breath, thrilled but not overawed... “I feel quite...” She catches her breath for a second, “ ... Flustered!”

Sophia looks from the pig to the Geordie ... Smiles... “Have you ever been this close to one before?”

“No ... I’ve only watched videos...” Answers Gina. “You?”

“Only on the dinner table!” Sophia laughs.

Behind them, Winston gets closer, not getting the dinner reference at all – moving up until Gina is able to sit up, rolling to her knees and reaching out to welcome the ugly creature with a nervous hand on the top of his head. He stops dead still as soon as her fingers touch his bristly head.

She moves her hand down the side of his face and he tips his head around toward her, like a dog searching for tickles. It would be a cute move if he wasn’t so ugly. “OOOhh, he’s such an ugly boy...!” She sighs.

As Gina strokes and pats the side of the pig’s face, Sophia leans forward and pushes up onto her knees, then knee-walks forward to the beast – a little closer than Gina ... She’s seen that the beast, as scary as he is, isn’t a threat, so she feels safe to shuffle up right infront of him and let him move that big, slimy snout over her chest, sniffing at her flesh, leaving a snotty trail down her cleavage. “Oh that’s revolting!” She sighs, her smile suggesting she’s not at all revolted!

She reaches out beyond the pig’s head to rub his neck, and Gina continues to rub the other side of his body – reaching down along his fat flank. Barely looking up from the pig to meet each other’s eyes.

Sophia gasping, “He’s fucking huge ... I can’t wait to see him on your back...”

Gina replying, “Ooooh yeah ... But you first ... Dirty pigwhore ... I want to see his cock in your nasty little cunt!”

They move to either side of him, moving along beside him – leaning forward over him, their boobs rubbing against his hairy back as they bring their heads together – still talking dirty about this filthy beast...

“He’s going to fill your cunt with piggy spunk – and I’m going to drink it all...” Spits Gina.

“OOoooohh ... I can’t wait...” Moans Sophia... “I want your mouth all over me, licking that pig spunk off me...”

They leans further forward, squashing their tits against the pig, bringing their lips together for another dirty, open mouthed, wet kiss ... The pig barely bothered that they are there.

They break off the kiss, both having the same instinct to lean and slide sideways, running their hands down his body, around and under his belly – both of them rubbing their hands over his prepuce, encouraging growth within ... It only takes a few seconds before the tip of his strange cock makes it’s first appearance – and both women are smiling in anticipation.

“Go on then...” Snarls our Geordie slut... “On your hands and knees ... Ready for the pig...”

Sophia doesn’t argue ... She’s happy to be bossed into position ... More than happy – excited. Turning around and leaning up against the slanted bed, elbows and knees against the mattress, arse pushed out backwards. She’s looking over her shoulder back at Gina and the pig ... Gina shuffles after her, grabs at the blonde’s panties and pulls them down over her stockings, exposing her firm arse to the pig...

The pig reacts to the site of her cunt, and its smell, and to her welcoming position, by shuffling forward, breathing hard as he moves up behind our slimline blonde, and then lurching up against her back, his huge bulk almost completely covering her. We hear her gasp as she takes his weight on her back, down through her thighs to her knees on the soft mattress – straining to support him...

We cut down to a low angle and watch his strange cock poking out under his belly, slithering in and out of his prepuce ... Almost appearing to seek out his sow’s pussy ... Slopping between her thighs and against her pussy lips...

“Oh you dirty bitch...” Snarls Gina, her accent particularly strong. “Letting a fucking pig mount you...”

Sophia says nothing, concentrating on supporting the huge bulk of the pig – arms and legs straight as he rocks and rolls on her back, his belly wrapped around her arse, that cock still stabbing unsuccessfully toward her pussy...

Gina drops down to get a better view of the business end of the action – and reaches in to steer the end of the pig’s cock between Sophia’s pussy lips – the first contact making Sophia jump and let out a little involuntary screech. “OOoohhhhh!”

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Series 4, Episode 18: RACHAEL We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... A large sewage treatment plant. A mini montage of big circular pools of household waste, being chewed up and cleaned by large rotating mechanical arms ... It looks like it smells terrible. The occasional member of staff, checking equipment, wearing full overalls...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS11 E06 Lucinda Glass 46 from Middlesbrough

We start this week’s show with establishing footage from our drone camera as it flies over a large area of well-appointed parkland – bowling greens, rows of trees in large curves, recently mown lawns, a children’s play park, over a small lake, more trees and then down to the neat semi-detached houses beyond... Dropping all the way down to street level, bringing our host into view – a white speck on the pavement at first, then as we get closer – a nicer, more attractive speck ... Closer...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e8 Brandy Gardner 44 black widow

Series 9, Episode 8: Brandy Gardner (44), from Wolverhampton We pan around a gritty, pebble strewn road, taking in a commercial storage facility on one side of us, an electrical sub-station infront of us, and then coming to rest on a large building supply business. It’s one of those ‘trade only’ places that the regular DIY guy wouldn’t even know exists. And then the less-than-attractive, but very popular, ‘figure’ of our host steps infront of the big warehouse. All the way from the east end...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E01 Christina Bruce 42 from Belfast

With series 12 completed, we roll straight through into series 13 - the same hosts, doing the same things all over again ... Aren’t we getting bored of this yet? Well, it appears not ... So... We start this week’s show with establishing shots of quiet suburban streets – semi-detached homes, very middle class and safe... And then, stepping into frame from the side, moving from behind the camera to infront - this week’s host ... Still the nation’s least likely sex symbol – short, fat,...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e16 Ava Marvaux 22

from Tottenham, London. We fade in on our hostess, Charley. She’s skirting that territory between sexy and strange. With her heavily botoxed face, obviously fake bolt-on boobs, and all those tattoos on her chest, her legs, her arms ... All wrapped up in too-small clothes, showing off as much flesh as possible – mini-skirt, sleeveless low-cut top. She’s strange, but she’s ours... We’re on a wide grey street, black fences on either side, nothing beyond them on one side, a blue storage...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e19 Belinda

Series 4, Episode 19: Belinda We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... We’re in an unimpressive residential area. Lots of orange/brown two story terraced houses that probably looked very modern and sharp in the early 80s, but now just look boring. An occasional resident walks along the street alone, a couple of cars pass by –...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e19 Sadie Fernandez 45

Series 6, Episode 18: Sadie Gonzalez (45) from Motherwell We fade in on a drone shot – flying over the middle of a small town ... Not too pretty, low rise, tightly packed ... Then panning around over a large, craggy area of parkland, before coming to rest on a large old-school factory. We hover over the factory for a moment, then cut to... Outside the factory ... Ground level. Our hostess – in a low cut top that shows off her fake boobs and chest covering ‘DOGWHORE’ tattoo – and tight...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e5 Julia Green 56

We fade in on high street – plenty of people around, obviously not during the Coronavirus lockdown. The camera swings around to face a bank, then moves in through the doors – past a member of staff on the front desk who waves at whoever is holding the camera (clearly knowing them) ... The camera moves past a line of customers and up to one of the cash windows ... The clerk behind the window looks up... She’s middle-aged, with a tired, almost ‘loose’ looking face – one of those big mouths...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e20 Tina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re looking at a sandy beach on a perfect summer’s day – small waves rolling...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e7 Siobhan

Series 4, Episode 7: SIOBHAN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Now we’re in the middle of a busy food-court - restaurants...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e1 Sammy Murty

We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e10 Alison Latham

Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e6 Julie Durand 29

Hand-held footage – a female hand reaches infront of us and opens a door – a big, light coloured long-haired Labrador, a golden retriever, races past us and bounds out into the room beyond – it’s a garage. A female voice – a familiar voice – with a Manchester accent, says (to him), “Yes ... We’re going for a little drive ... One of your favourite drives ... Yes... !” She opens one of the rear doors of the car, and the dog leaps in, his hindpaws scraping the leather of the seats as he heaves...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

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