The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary series s4e16 Olivia
- 2 years ago
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We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of St Mary’s Stadium, home of Southampton Football Club ... Then spinning around to look over the River Solent, zooming in on a large, gray-green structure with little round windows ... Then we cut to that building – on a dusty industrial estate - with the river and St Mary’s Stadium in the background. A sign on the front of the building reads “MAIN AGGREGATES”.
Our host steps into frame from the side, immediately making the scene better to look at ... Unusually, she’s opted for trousers rather than a skirt or dress ... Tight blue jeans that don’t keep any secrets – her perfect little arse looking tight and totally fuckable ... She’s wearing a leather jacket that’s hanging open at the front so we can see that there’s nothing but a bra underneath ... Her perfect fake globes sitting pretty of display ... It’s our favourite floozy, the dimpled former pornstar, Renae Russell – and she’s ready to launch into another introduction...
“Hello, and welcome to another edition of our little bestiality show ... I’m your host, Renae Russell, and this week, I’ve come down to Southampton, to meet a hard working lady – who needs to take a vacation in ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’!”
We cut to look at the large MAIN AGGREGATES building again – and watch as a large woman in dusty blue overalls approaches. She’s tall and wide rather than fat. Powerful and beefy rather than overweight. She walks with wide rather than long strides, and somewhat flat-footed, not at all graceful of feminine. As she gets closer we see that her face matches her body – wide and plain, somewhat featureless, surrounded by dusty (and dull) short curls.
She smiles as she comes up next to little Renae – and you couldn’t imagine a more marked difference between two women. The beauty and the beast – before our actual beast has even put in an appearance. The guest towering 10 inches over her host, wider than her, looking twice her weight ... She introduces herself – direct to camera – in a gruff southern hack of a voice, as if she’s reporting to duty rather than chasing a fantasy.
“My name’s Tamara Cooper ... I’m 32 years old, and I’m from Southampton in Hampshire.” She looks sideways to Jenna, then remembers she’s missed a line, and adds, “And I want to have sex with a dog.”
She looks around to Renae again, with a slightly gormless smile, happy she’s remembered all her words this time. She’s a big girl, but perhaps doesn’t have the biggest brain.
Renae prompts her, “So ... How did this all begin...”
Tamara looks momentarily confused, then our host clarifies, “What turned you on to the idea of having sex with a dog?”
Tamara smiles, realising what’s expected of her, and launches into her story – speaking into Renae’s microphone as our host nods along with her.
“Well, I’ve always had trouble with dating ... I’m not the kind of girl who attracts people, or impresses on a first date ... I decided a long time ago that I would always say yes to whatever anyone wanted, just to kind of buy myself some extra time ... But I think I scare a lot of people off.” We don’t doubt her. A six-foot-two, broad-shouldered, plane looking woman isn’t exactly top of the most wanted list for most men.
She continues, “Anyway ... I was on a blind date with a guy I’d met on Tinder – and we seemed to be getting on okay, but not, you know, ‘really great’ ... So I’m trying to keep him interested, and I says to myself, just keep saying yes to anything he says ... And he says something about, big women liking anal sex ... And I’d never tried it, but I says, ‘yes’ ... Then he’s talking about how he’s always wanted a threesome, I says ‘yes’, because I don’t mind girls, or more guys ... I says, ‘I’ll try anything once’ ... And that’s when he says, ‘I’ve always wanted to watch a woman having sex with a dog’, and I didn’t even think about it – he was funny, he was okay looking, he was talking to me, sharing private things with me, so I just says, ‘yes’ ... And he laughed, kind of nervous, and told me he could set it up ... And I wasn’t even thinking about having sex with a dog, I was just thinking that he was thinking about me being part of his future ... He was planning ahead, for me ... I’ve honestly never had anyone talking about spending more time with me ... I was thinking, if I have to behave like a total slut to keep him happy, I’m ready to do that ... If I do it long enough maybe he’ll fall in love with me. All this on the first date! And he said he’d set it up and get back to me, then he never did ... But the thought stuck with me. I was really turned on by it ... It had started out being the thought of a man wanting to set that up for me, and wanting to see me do it ... And then it became about me wanting to do it, and now it’s become about wanting people to watch me do it ... So I ended up thinking about who would want to watch me do it, and how would I set that up?”
“And that’s where we come in?” Smiles Renae.
“Yeaah. If I do it on your show, everyone will watch – and someone’s bound to like it ... And you can put my phone number up on the screen and they can contact me ... I’d love to be the centre of attention for a change.”
“Ahh, I see...” Squeaks Renae. “Well, just for you, we’ve already set it up ... And I think there are a even a few people around to watch you in action...”
Tamara looks pretty happy with the idea. Nodding and smiling.
“So...” Continues Renae. “If you’d like to strip off, we can bring our big boy in right now – and get this game started.”
Tamara doesn’t need any further invitation, unzipping the front of her overalls and peeling them off her wide shoulders right here in the yard – managing to do this in the least sexy manner possible ... A race to undress rather than a sexy strip ... Quicky showing off a powerful looking body in a surprisingly sexy looking black corset/basque.
Her boobs are smallish, and look a little lost, widely spaced on her powerful looking chest. Her arms and legs are muscular, her hips wide, buttocks firm. Long suspenders reach down from the bottom of her basque to the top of her stockings, which almost reach her crotch – and she’s not wearing panties and we can see tuft of light brown pussy hair. Her final move, again performed in an unsensual manner, is to pull the cups of her corset/basque down to pop out her boobs – which sag wide, big nipples begging to be pulled – but ignored by our guest.
“Alright then...” She calls, that no-nonsense functional tone in her voice, “Where’s this beasty then?”
We cut to a slow-motion shot of that big, powerful, blue-grey beast walking through the yard toward our girls ... He appears to be floating through the air as he bounces from one paw to the next, skipping over the dirty ground.
Then we’re looking at Tamara, crouching low with her knees out wide, her pussy fully exposed – and she doesn’t care. She’s far more interested in welcoming Logan. Grabbing at his neck and collar, reaching over his back to touch his muscles...
He takes her touch as a sign that he’s free to move closer – drops his head between her thighs and pushes forward, bidding his snout right up against her, snorting hard, then beginning to slop his tongue out over her meaty pussy lips. Tamara holds position but looks up at our camera, flashing us an impressed look, as if she hadn’t expected a dog’s tongue to feel good on her pussy ... As if!
Between her legs, Logan angles his head up as he slides his tongue out and over her pussy, forcing/slipping it between them...
The slightly confused smile on Tamara’s face suggests that she loves this, but she keeps her body still – there’s no shaking or rocking, and she keeps her balance, unaffected by pleasure or pressure as he continues to push and lick at her – just looking down, crouching a little deeper, and letting him get on with it...
Renae stands over them, smiling ... Then suggests, “If you lie down on your back, he’ll lick you out like a pro...”
Tamara nods and immediately flops back onto her backside – bum into the dirt, then lays down on her back, legs in the air and spread wide. She’s not as flexible as some of our guests, so they are bent legs rather than stretched out straight and wide ... The dog cares not one bit, following her as she drops back, his tongue barely leaving her cunt.
She brings her hands up to her chest, pulling the front of her basque down clear of her boobs, taking the nipples between her fingers and thumbs and squeezing/pinching/pulling on them as the dog licks.
She’s gasping for breath and arching her back, pulling on her nipples and spreading her powerful thighs wider and wider apart as he continues to lick at her – over and over ... His tongue sliding and slipping over her crack, again and again...
She lifts her head up to look down over her tits and belly, to watch the dog’s head between her thighs – licking and licking as she pulls on her nipples ... Her legs in the air, shaking...
She suddenly drops her head back to the dirt, arching her back, her body beginning to shake ... She lets out a gasp that sticks in her throat – breaking out into a sweat ... Bucking her hips up toward his snout, twisting ... Tensing up her face as...
She cums loud ... Letting out a sudden growl, “OOooohhhhhmmmmmm!”
She shakes through the pleasure ... Pulling and twisting her nipples away from her tits – straining them as her heart pounds overtime.
Logan continues, loving the taste, sensing that his bitch is enjoying it, and licking even more enthusiastically ... It’s a perfect cycle for our guest – who is changing from the big brute to the broken orgasmic slut infront of us ... No longer looking like a powerful woman who could beat most men up, and looking more and more like a feeble girly ... Almost to the point of passing out...
Just as we think her nipples are about to pull off the end of her tits, she releases them, gasping/squealing again, bringing her hands up to the head, covering her face, twisting and thrashing...
She’s done – and Renae recognises it, stepping in and showing mercy, grabbing Logan by the collar and pulling him back, “Gooooood booooyyy ... Mercy ... Mercy ... Give her a break...”
Tamara lays on her back, hands over her face, chest heaving, legs open, pussy wide and wet. Then moves her hands, uncovering her face – letting us see the joy...
Let’s be clear here – some women look plain until they are smiling, and some look plain until the have that post-orgasmic glow ... Tamara looks just as plain after she’s cum as she did before, the only difference is that she’s now sweaty and out of breath as well as plain – but God she’s happy!
“Oh ffffucckk!” She gasps, half laughing.
“Are you okay?” Giggles our host, her playful voice barely giving away that she knows how over-stimulated her guest is. “He gave you a good one, didn’t he?”
Tamara doesn’t reply – too busy sucking in another lungful of air.
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We fade in on high street – plenty of people around, obviously not during the Coronavirus lockdown. The camera swings around to face a bank, then moves in through the doors – past a member of staff on the front desk who waves at whoever is holding the camera (clearly knowing them) ... The camera moves past a line of customers and up to one of the cash windows ... The clerk behind the window looks up... She’s middle-aged, with a tired, almost ‘loose’ looking face – one of those big mouths...
We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a built-up inner-city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a crowded sandy beach – kids building sandcastles, parents sunbathing ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures... Now we’re looking at a sandy beach on a perfect summer’s day – small waves rolling...
Series 4, Episode 7: SIOBHAN We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a grim street of residential blocks – skinny kids running around as exhausted looking single mothers carry the shopping home ... Then we’re looking down at a crowded street market – barrows selling everything from fresh fruit and veg, to handmade jewelry and knock-off designer handbags. Now we’re in the middle of a busy food-court - restaurants...
We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...
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Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...
“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...
Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...
As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...
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Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...
We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...
We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...
Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...
We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...
We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...
We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...
We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...
Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...
We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...
We’re cruising along a wide and quiet suburban street. Green lawns stretch back from the pavement to the nice semi-detached homes. There’s a slim woman walking a large dog along the side of the road, and we pan around to look at her as we pass – it’s no-one we know, but we kind of wish we did! Then we’re looking forward again – seeing an intersection infront of us ... Then pulling up, looking out of the side window right at a single story, flat-roofed building. A sign outside reads,...
Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...
We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...
Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...