The United Kingdom Of Zoo (A Fake BBC Documentary Series)S13, E09: Zoey Barton (28), From Gillingham free porn video

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We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large hospital (the first two floors are red brick, the third level clad in silver coloured metal sidings. The red brick structure gives way to a dull grey/white building with lots of windows, and at ground level a large ambulance drop-off area. A sign reads, “MEDWAY MARITIME HOSPITAL”...

And then our host steps into frame ... A sexy, curvy, blonde – her eye-catching figure dressed in a tight little-red-dress, her boobs doing their best to escape from the top, and the gusset of her panties almost peeking out from below her skirt.

She doesn’t have a dog with her this week, and it seems strange to see her without a leash in her hand ... She compensates by using her hands a lot as she introduces herself and the show in her familiar mid-west American accent, “Hello, and welcome back to another edition of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’, with me, your host, Jenna McCartney ... And this week, I’m in Gillingham, in the south-east of England, to try a first in the history of our show ... I’ve had an interesting week of research, and I’m sure our latest guest will have an enjoyable time making her fantasy reality...”

We cut away from her to see a mini-montage of a pretty blonde doctor doing her rounds. White coat, stethoscope and clipboard...

Even without make-up, and with her long hair tied back in a loose ponytail – she’s unmistakably pretty – with strong cheekbones, a thin nose, and a fine jawline. She’s slim, and despite the white coat we can guess that she’s got a reasonable figure.

She introduces herself, and tells her story, mostly in voice-over to this montage. She sounds professional, educated, and fun. “My name’s Zoey Barton ... I’m 28 years old, and I’m a doctor, working in the A & E department at Medway Maritime Hospital. I’ve been married for three years, I don’t have any children, and ... I’m obsessed with bestiality!”

We intercut between the slice-of-life clips of her at the hospital, and close-up shots of her telling her story.

“I didn’t get into it until I was already in my twenties ... It’s not a teenage fantasy – or something that’s been on my mind forever ... What happened was - I had a boyfriend who was a furry ... He had a costume and everything. It was a little bit strange at first, but, you know, to be honest, he was a really nice guy, and frankly – he was really good in bed...”

She pauses, then we cut to another shot as she continues, “He liked to be called ‘The Goat’. Like I said, I thought it was strange, but I was really happy he had been open with me, and trusted me enough to tell me. He didn’t want to wear the costume every time we had sex, but I never said no when he wanted to ... I asked him about real animals, and he said it was just a fantasy and he didn’t want to see me do it for real, because he always wanted to be the one fucking me ... But I sometimes imagined it ... When he was fucking me, I know he was imagining being a goat, or whatever, so I imagined him being a goat ... And that got me into thinking about animals ... And here we are...”

We cut to a wider shot, and see that she is sitting at one end of a three-seater couch, with our American host sitting at the other end ... Evidently prompting her guest with questions. “Here we are, indeed ... All the way from a freaky boyfriend, to performing bestiality on national television...”

Zoey nods, “I know ... I know ... I’m just a freak!”

Both ladies laugh with each other – then Jenna checks, “And the boyfriend?”

“Oh, he’s out of the story ... I moved on.” Zoey smiles again. “In most respects.”

“In that case, I think it’s time we were moving on...” She points at her guest, getting bossy, “You ... Strip ... I’ve got a special friend waiting outside for you...”

Our guest stands up and begins to unbutton her blouse ... Before things get interesting, we cut outside to a farmyard, and we’re looking at a goat. Wide-bodied, thin-legged, with sad eyes and a dumb look on his face as he chews on straw.

We hear Zoey before we see her, “Oooohh myyyyy GGaaaahhhhddd...” Then cut to see her approaching the goat – she’s naked and we like it ... Her blonde hair hanging down over her shoulders, almost reaching the nipples on her perky B-cup breasts ... Her belly is slim (but not flat), her pussy clean shaven, her legs long and slim. She’s a very agreeable sight – especially when she smiles, which she’s doing right now as she approaches the goat – letting us see that his back is just about level with her hips.

Jenna completes the introductions, telling us that, “This ... Is ... Billy!”

Zoey reaches out toward his nose, chuckling to herself, repeating, “Billy – Goat” quietly as she runs her hand up to the top of his head, between his curled horns, scratching at his crown, then louder, saying “Hello Billy...” with a mix of anticipation and sudden shyness ... He looks up at her with a mixture of confusion and antitherapy.

She wraps her other hand around one of his horns, gripping it like a handle – taking control the beast, partly from fear, and partly because it’s just fucking sexy to be in control of a strange creature ... Still stroking/patting his head with the other hand, she pulls him around a little, turning him side-on to our camera.

She bends forward from the hips, looking up at our camera as she lowers her firm tits to his back, and rubbing them gently against the rough hair along his spine. Letting out a slow moan/sigh as she feels the course hair against her sensitive nipples...

She hugs up close to him, reaching over his body and down his side, slipping her hand under his belly ... Feeling around to find his privates ... Struggling ... Leaning forward, flattening her boobs on his back as she stretches and twists to reach further back between his legs and find something worth rubbing...

We cut to a low angle, looking up from beneath the goat’s belly as our guest finds what she’s looking for and begins to rub her palm over it, feeling it begin to swell, a sharp little pink fleshy tip poking out from his hairy belly ... Rubbing harder, letting her fingers slide either side of the glistening protuberance ... Rubbing as it grows (longer rather than thicker)...

This is our first goat dick – so we hold on this image a little longer to give our viewers a decent look as it grows. Long and thin, more pointed that any other cock we’ve seen on our show – about the same girth as our pig’s, but without any kind of a twist, this is a straight tool...

We cut to Zoey’s face, pressed down sideways against the goat’s back, her cheek against his hair, gasping, “Ooooooohhhh ... That’s it ... Nice and hard ... Mmmmmmm...” – flicking her big blue eyes up toward our camera and letting a smile briefly cross her lips as it dawns on her that we’re watching her fondles a goat’s prick...

She pushes forward slightly, mashing her tits harder up against him, giving herself another couple of inches of reach so that she can wrap her fingers around that skinny cock...

We cut back to the low angle close-up of his under-carriage, watching as Zoey grips on the shaft and gently tugs and pulls on it ... Exposing a little more pinkness ... Jerking it a little, showing that it’s clearly stiffening up even if it’s not expanding.

Then we cut to a shot of her crouching down beside the beast, feet close together, knees wide, pussy exposed, bringing her head down under his belly. Still gripping his hard dick in one hand, bringing her other down between her thighs to rub her pussy.

She’s smiling as she repositions herself – bending forward, head under his belly, mouth toward that strange cock ... Licking her lips, opening up, tongue slipping out as she makes her move ... Pulling on his tool, stretching it toward her mouth as much as she’s moving her head – making contact, and sighing/gasping as she feels warm flesh on the flat of her tongue ... Letting it stroke over her as much as she’s licking it ... Pulling back for a second so she can utter an “Oh God...”, and then lurching forward to wrap her mouth around it, trapping the pink probe between her lips and sucking on it like the straw in a milk-shake...

We hear Jenna from just out of shot as she asks, “How does that taste?” and see our guest’s immediate reaction, smiling around that skinny dick, breaking the seal around it, letting a little fluid dribble out (we don’t know if it’s goat-spunk or her own saliva, but it’s shiny and wet, and looks very sexy running over her chin).

Regaining her focus, she returns to sucking without saying a word, but we know the answer to the question is “awesome”. She sucks it in, then pulls it out – almost – stopping short so that she can suck it back in ... The smooth pink meat slipping smoothly between her soft, thin lips...

We wonder how much fun a woman could have with a dick this thin, but at the same time envy the goat the treatment she is giving him. She’s not the most beautiful woman we’ve ever had on our show, but there’s not a heterosexual man in our audience who wouldn’t swap places with that goat right now – especially with her mouth as well lubricated as it appears to be ... More slimy fluid escaping the corners of her mouth and running down her chin, to her neck, then trickling down to her chest...

She shuffles forward a little to get her head right under the cock – sucking in deeper – it’s thin, but it’s long, and the tip is clearly approaching the back of her throat ... And when it makes contact, she gags, coughing the whole thing out, giving us our best shot yet of a fully erect goat penis ... Long and thin, pointed, bending slightly under it’s own weight (which isn’t much) ... Fluid dripping from the end, confirming that at least some of that glistening mess on her chin and neck is goat-spunk.

She looks at that strange cock, pondering whether she should take it back into her mouth – then raises a hand and takes the thin shaft between her fingers, holding it steady as she leans forward and runs the tip around her lips like a lipstick, letting the drops of goat-cum wet them.

After a couple of circuits, she pokes her tongue out and flicks it over the tip ... Splashing as much goat spunk up against his belly as she gets into her own mouth ... Then licking her lips again, and pushing forward again – pushing the cock between her lips, closing them around it, sucking on it like a straw ... Moving her head moving back and forth, sucking hard ... Thin cheeks sucking in to highlight her cheekbones...

We pull back to a wide shot again so that we can see how disinterested the goat looks, just staring ahead at the wall as our guest continues to work his thin cock with her mouth, ducking her face forward toward his belly ... One hand holding the base of his shaft, the other hand down between her thighs, fingers tickling her pussy.

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We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a perverted version of Supergirl ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea level over the Severn Estuary, between Wales (with a cartoonish huge flag waving on the coast, and the south-west coast of England, with...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e10 Alison Latham

Series 5, Episode 10: Alison Latham (47) – Wolverhampton We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then our very cartoonish, top heavy and slutty caricature of Charley appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” Then she waves for us to follow her, turns and skydives toward the country below at...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e7 Effat Hassan 41

Footage through a car window, looking out at a twilight sky and a virtually empty motorway ahead ... There’s a car in the distance ahead of us, an occasional car or truck coming the other way, passing us at speed, nothing like you’d expect from a busy rush hour motorway. Then we’re looking down at the driver from a high angle, corner mounted GoPro. The driver, as you’d expect, is the cleavage heavy, filthy looking pornstar-esque Charley Ozvik, the face of the British bestiality business, and...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e3 Rebecca

“The United Kingdom of Zoo” Series 5, Episode 3: Rebecca We open with a shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us like a twisted version of the old “Bewitched’ tv titles ... She smiles at us, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit to sea level over the English Channel, off the south coast, in...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e7 Asha

Series 5, Episode 7: Asha Goyal We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our host, Charley, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the UK below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess10e01 Anita Vernon 25 from Bury

As part of our commitment to social distancing and the safety of our great nation, this season of the “United Kingdom of Zoo” has been filmed almost entirely with remote cameras. We wish to thank the many lovely ladies who have travelled to see us at our Manchester studios, and hope they all enjoyed fulfilling their fantasies as much as we enjoyed watching... We fade in on a dark set. A spotlight illuminates a single bed – steel-frame, mattress, no bedclothes or pillows. We had a scour a...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess3e10 Stacy 44 hairdresser from London

Series 3, Episode 10: Stacy On one side of the street a row of pre-War three-story buildings – shopfront downstairs, residential apartment/flats above. On the other side of the street, modern four/five level office buildings, and an old train station with a sign outside that reads, “Welcome to Enfield Chase”. We’re in North London to meet our next subject, and she’s a subject who’s worth meeting. Back to those shopfronts – one in particular – Hair By Hottinger. A modest hair and beauty...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess6e11 Janine Saunders 18

Series 6, Episode 11 – Janine Saunders (18), from Birmingham We fade in on a nice townhouse in a nice neighbourhood – then we cut to inside the house and see our hostess – Charley – sitting at her desk, a large computer editing suite laid out infront of her (big computer, multiple screens, etc.) She appears to be editing an episode of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’ as we watch, although there’s nothing sexual on screen at the moment, just a young couple walking a large Alsatian. Charley turns...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e2 Victoria Bravia 20

We open with our beautiful animated shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Then our cartoon, top heavy tattooed version of Charley appears, floating in the sky with us, winking and smiling - then waving for us to follow her as she turns and falls toward the country at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the northern part of England, all the way down to a large old city of Sheffield right in the middle, in just a few seconds. Our animated Charley leads us all the...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess9e16 Sienna Triosi 24 married showoff

Series 9, Episode 16: Sienna Triosi (24), from Ipswich We open with a shot of a very boring, street two-up two-down terraced houses. Small paved front yards provide off street parking for a couple of small cars each. And then, walking up the street toward us – the chunky figure of our favourite Cockney wideboy, Dennis, and beside him the sleek, narrow figure of his mean looking, hard-loving, but ultimately very well-behaved Doberman, Casanova. We track backwards as he walks – keeping him...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12E19 Emma Withe 54 from Oakham

We fade in in the middle of a quiet street, in the low-rise central area of a small midlands town, with one and two story buildings around us. To one side, a long flat warehouse/factory type unit, stocking and fitting tyres for local drivers, to the other, the town’s train station. Looking like a traditional old station, but rebuilt fairly recently. There’s a small car park between us and the station, and it’s almost full. We watch as a car drives down the road toward us, then turns into the...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e13 Colette

Series 4, Episode 13: COLETTE We see that familiar opening sequence – various scenes of UK life, taken from the introductions to previous episodes – a field, a beach, a pub, a motorway ... And then we’re looking at something new... This time our drone camera is floating over a road in a nice suburb on a beautiful sunny day. High stone/brick walls separate nice houses from the pavement. Not too many cars driving by. We’re following a middle-aged woman as she jogs ... Well, it’s more of a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess4e4 Melina

We’re looking at the beautiful English countryside – fields, stone walls, a few cows grazing ... Then we’re looking at a build-up inner city street – big shop windows and hundreds of people walking by ... Then we’re looking at a big boat crossing over a river – tourists leaning over the sides, taking pictures ... And finally we’re floating over the dull terraced houses and occasional grim tower-block of a northern English city. Over allotments, over a slow-moving river, dropping down toward a...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e16 Lily Parkinson 32

Series 8, Episode 16: Lily Parkinson (32), from Chester We pan over a couple of large wooden animal shapes – a rhino and a giraffe - open on a large sign that reads “Chester Zoo”, then pan down to the main gates, watching as an excited family enters the facility. A mini-montage shows us some of the animals – large lizards, chimpanzees, elephants, lions, and finally a pair of dingos ... Pausing on the final animals as one suddenly mounts the other and starts fucking her ... We cut to a...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS13E17 Eva Ahn 33 from Motherwell

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a bright and classy business park – 2 and 3 level buildings with red and white facias, large black windows, small car parks... The car parks are mostly empty as we pan from one building to the next, and we realize that the sun is dropping in the background – it’s an evening shoot, and all of the workers have gone home for the day... We end our pan looking at the one building with cars/vans in the carpark. And then our host steps into...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess12e07 Cora Toney 25 from Newcastle

We start this week’s show with establishing shots of a large allotment on a sunny day – lots of small gardens sectioned off from one another, middle aged men avoiding their families – growing flowers, vegetables, or just hiding in garden sheds – and then we’re looking at a large blue-grey Weimaraner ... Watching for a moment as he sniffs around the corner of a garden shed, then turns, cocks his leg, and pisses on it... And then, stepping out from behind the shed, catching a little of that...

3 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS12 E20 Eva Straskova 30 from Notting Hill London

We start this week’s show with an establishing shot of a large, grey, concrete and glass building. Seven storeys high, each as boring and square as the last. If it wasn’t for the row of green trees planted in the wide pavement out front there wouldn’t be any colour here at all. We move toward the building and note that the ground floor windows are mirrored glass – briefly casting a reflection of our camera crew – as we approach a pair of glass double-doors. Stencilled on the glass, a very...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e5 Andrea

Series 5, Episode 5: Andrea Fereday (29) – Uxbridge We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space... Our cartoonish, top heavy image of Charley appears, floating infront of us, smiling and giggling, then waves for us to follow her ... Turns and dives toward the country at hyper-sonic speed – and we follow - dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading toward the south, toward London, then veering westward as we hurtle toward the ground ... Reaching ground level in...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS14E01 Adrienne Huntington 42 from Swanage

We open this week’s show, as usual, with an establishing shot of the seafront of a small seaside town. Shops and shoppers, deserted ice-cream stands, a beach filled with yellow sand but virtually no holiday makers, and a very choppy bay stretching out in the distance, with land on one side and a pier on the other. We can hear the unmistakable blustering sound of wind blowing in off the sea ... We’re clearly at a seaside resort in the middle of winter. A big caption appears, filling almost...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e18 Sylvia Distin 55 from Chelmsford

We’re cruising along a wide and quiet suburban street. Green lawns stretch back from the pavement to the nice semi-detached homes. There’s a slim woman walking a large dog along the side of the road, and we pan around to look at her as we pass – it’s no-one we know, but we kind of wish we did! Then we’re looking forward again – seeing an intersection infront of us ... Then pulling up, looking out of the side window right at a single story, flat-roofed building. A sign outside reads,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e8 Patricia

Series 5, Episode 8: Patricia Grant (41) – Dagenham We open with our familiar high image of the United Kingdom – from high up in orbit ... The whole of the British Isles in one shot. Then our top-heavy cartoon character version of Charley, our host, appears infront of us ... She points down toward the landmass below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then waves and turns and falls toward the country at...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e13 AnneMarie Silverwood

We open with our beautiful animation of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – then fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit – heading north, toward Scotland ... Reaching ground level in the countryside in seconds. From here we race north, approaching cartoon St Andrew’s flags indicating that we are entering Scotland. High speed overland, fading through to live action as we enter the outer suburbs of a city ... Then through the streets...

4 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess5e6 Maria

Series 5, Episode 6: Maria Sinclair (55) We open with an image of the United Kingdom – from high, high up ... The whole country in one shot. Then a very cartoonish, top heavy pouting caricature of our beloved Charley appears, floating in the sky with us ... She points down toward the country below and says, “Hey look ... It’s the United Kingdom of Zoo ... Let’s look closer and see what we can see...” She giggles, then turns and dives toward the country at super-sonic speed, dropping to sea...

1 year ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriess8e6 Simone Butt 27 pig lover

Series 8, Episode 6: Simone Butt (27), from Bristol We open with an establishing shot of an impressive, modern brick and glass façade of a six-story office block on a busy street. Very clean, under a clear blue sky. We can see a figure approaching along the pavement, a slim lady with blonde hair. She’s wearing ripped blue jeans and a tight t-shirt, and her nice round boobs bounce on every step. It’s our Polish princess, Petra – and this week there’s no sign of her lovely Labrador. She...

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